Yep. I flashed James Marsters.

[nightvictorious]

You've all heard me say it before, in blogs and in phone declarations almost indecipherable due to giggles. But this, kids, was the Best. Weekend. Of. My. Life.

THURSDAY.

It started out with some difficulty. Due possibly to the karmic backlash of a spell the night before - or due to too much air traffic; take your pick - Kelly and I's flight was cancelled. We got moved from 5:45 AM to 8:30 PM, which wasn't so bad as we had time to go home and sleep. We got into LaGuardia around midnight or so, and ended up accidentally getting off the bus in Harlem. Oops. We caught a cab to our hostel at 95th and Broadway, which we were pleased to notice had locking doors, clean bathrooms, and veritable hoards of hot European boys. (Most of them were gay, but all of them made pretty eye candy.) We had a cute, small private room with a bunk bed. We left it several times for cigarettes, watching the rats scamper around. Ah, Manhattan, how I missed thee. Considering the fact that the following day held James Marsters in the flesh, no one can blame us for our insomnia. We spent the majority of the wee morning hours giggling and hypothesizing regarding the next day, and I set up a mini-shrine for magickal purposes on the shelf of our closet. We got two hours of sleep.

FRIDAY.

We woke up early feeling surprisingly refreshed. A mere two hours of rest didn't stop us from being insanely excited over James. We grabbed Starbucks and cigarettes, as we knew would be necessary, and took the Metro to Port Authority. There we caught the bus to Secaucus. We were both fairly calm during the bus ride, except for those times we'd both look over and be grinning or one of us would open our cell phone to flash a wallpaper of Spike at the other, and then the giggles would start and we'd almost need CPR. I was wearing, for all interested parties, a tan plaid mini-skirt, and my HUSTLER shirt that exclaims, "Relax. It's Just Sex!"

We got to the Crowne Plaza way before we had to, which was good as we had lots of time to chain-smoke, check our makeup a billion times, and buy things. Kelly got her seat and autograph ticket sorted out for the day, and then we headed to the vendors' room. The first table was James' official merch table, and Kelly and I damn near fell over seeing that many gorgeous pictures of James the second we walked in the door. I bought a picture of him with his guitar, and the 'Words and Music' DVD. Kelly got a couple of pictures as well, and we wandered. At one table I found a thong that said 'Spike' on the front, so I absolutely couldn't resist. The Buzzy Multimedia table had the Dresden audiobooks going, and I would've been happy to stand there all day listening to James as Dresden, but alas, we had places to go. We wandered in and out of the vendors' room for many a cigarette break, and at one point ran into Brian O'Halloran. He's so freaking cool. He wrote a note for me and said, 'Love the tats!' He signed one for my brother and said, 'Cute sister!' (I later gave him my number, just for the sheer amusement of getting to tell all my Kevin Smith fanatic friends that I gave Dante my number.)

Around 4 o'clock was the photo op. Now, in Kelly and I's opinion, they really need to do this a little differently. If the panel or the signing was first, one would have time to get acclimated to being in the presence of James. When the photo op is first, they just shove you in a room and boom, you're there, standing next to James. It's really not fair, and definitely the situation most likely to make girls freak out and faint. We were in line and met a few other first-timers (hi, Maria and Jenny!!!), and Kelly and I argued over who should go first. I gave in and said I would. She and I decided to get a picture of ourselves, and as we did Maria's fiancée told us about four times to turn around. We did and James was walking from the elevator to the door of the photo room, looking fanfuckingtastic in jeans and a tight grey shirt. He waved to us all and as soon as he'd passed, Kelly and I just about died. My heart was racing and I could barely breathe, and there were only five people in line before us. I checked my makeup one last time before we headed in, and soon found myself being ushered in to where James sat.

I did okay. I wasn't shaking or shrieking, which is always a plus. He shook my hand, and I told him my name and reminded him I talked to him on the radio a few months before. He grinned and said, "You're the Nadia!" I giggled, "Yes, I'm the Nadia." We got up close for the picture, which I tried to ignore because if I thought too much about touching him I might've died. We took two pictures, because in the first one I was half-blinking or something, and between photos he looked down and saw my shirt, and purred, "You're dirty." It was one of those giggle-or-die situations, so I giggled. I walked away confidently, giving him a smile as I left. Kelly was next, and he loved her eyes and told her so. One of the security guards commented that she looked like she was going to faint, which she thankfully didn't.



We scampered quickly downstairs to smoke about 455,753,857 cigarettes in succession. Okay, maybe it was more like 4, but we were so excited, even an amount in the high millions wouldn't have calmed us down. We had survived the photo op - now it was time for the Q & A panel. We went downstairs and found our seats, which were in row L, only about 8 or 9 rows back, which really wasn't bad. None of my pictures turned out too well from it, but we could see him just fine. He was funny, charismatic, sexy, and awesome in general. I asked him which Dresden character he felt closest to, and he said Harry. One thing about James is, when he talks, he talks, and really doesn't stop until he absolutely has to. There were a few really deep, philosophical questions that could've kept him going for hours if he was allowed. And he has such an abundance of energy, always gesturing when he talks, always excited and happy to be doing what he's doing, so expressive and shining and brilliant and fun. After the panel, which lasted about an hour, was the autograph signing.

The line lasted quite awhile, but was well worth it. I met one girl named Kimmy who immediately won my respect and love as a groupie, as she'd asked James to bite her neck and he'd done so. Lucky, lucky girl. When at last we got up to the front of the line, I had James sign a picture, and asked about what the set length would be like for the concerts the next day. He said about an hour and fifteen minutes, if he didn't stop and chat with people during the show. I gave him a note then which had my number on it. I knew there was a .009 percent chance he'd ever call me, but at least I tried, dammit. Can't get anywhere without at least trying. Now, here's the best part.

When he stood up from the table to give me a hug, we hugged, and then our lips just…met. I've never had a kiss or any sexual experience or anything that made the world disappear entirely, but you always read about such things, about the world fading away with a kiss. This was that kiss. There wasn't even tongue or anything, but for two seconds, it was my lips and they were touching his lips and that was the entire world right there. I could literally feel everything else just fade away to nothing.

When it ended, I grinned and blushed, and walked away beaming so hard my face hurt. Needless to say, another Newport marathon ensued.

Kelly and I hung out at the Plaza a bit longer before deciding to head back to Manhattan. The train ride was one full of giggles, longing sighs, retelling of magic moments, and declarations of exhaustion or the need for another cigarette.

While waiting for the Subway, our attention was captured by a gorgeous young man named Joshua Hawksley, who's a really fantastic musician and beautiful to boot. Just wanted to add him here so you guys can check him out at www.myspace.com/RoseIsland. He's really just awesome.

The rest of the night's mostly a blur. I'm pretty sure we grabbed food at some point? I don't really remember. All I can remember was that kiss, and that I fell asleep that night listening to Shivaree.

Giddy-up, old boy, it's time to go
Voulez-vous savoir the love below
Brother, I've got more than you can take
But more than I can do to stay awake

I close my eyes
So I
Can dream of ways to keep you occupied
So I
Can lock you up, we'll keep it classified
Alright
You're mine tonight, son
When I close my eyes

SATURDAY.

I woke up with cramps so debilitating that I could barely move. If it hadn't been for James' shows, I would've stayed in bed all day, honestly. I doubled over a few times trying to get ready that morning - it really, really sucked. We had crashed around midnight or so the night before, and got a whole six hours of sleep, which was an improvement on Thursday night. We woke up at about six AM, and again headed out for Starbucks and smokes. Then it was off to Penn station to catch the train to Long Island, and we reached the Crazy Donkey around 9:30 AM. There were about a dozen people in line already, and we made conversation with a few other fans in line. Kelly and I spotted a car whose license plate said SPANGEL, which we found pretty much the most awesome thing ever. I was wearing another mini-skirt and a tank top, which I was grateful for as it was really warm out. I tried to get as much sun as possible, as I've recently become obsessed with being slightly bronzed. The hours passed by with Kelly and I spazzing out, discussing which songs should be played, which ones we prayed wouldn't be, and what he'd be wearing. We were both hoping for a tight black t-shirt.

James was driven up in what appeared to be a shitty silver Oldsmobile, which we found hilarious for some reason. We waited out the remaining hours chatting, sharing jokes and stories, hearing about other cons and concerts from the women we sat with, played cards, and I kept Shivaree on my headphones. (Don't know how it happened, but I'd forgotten to bring any James CDs on this trip. Weird.) The venue doors opened at 2 PM, and we were in the front row, but way on the side. Not the best spot for pictures, but again, we could see everything just fine, so it was alright. The first opening band was called Linus Flax, and they were pretty kickass. James entered the venue through a side door rather near us during their set, so we saw him as he stepped backstage. Indeed, Kelly and I's hopes for a tight black t-shirt had been fulfilled, and we fangirled quietly over that fact while Linus Flax played. They were pretty good. The lead singer/pianist is absolutely adorable, and a fantastic singer. She was so nervous but it was definitely a cute kind of nervous. I can't recall who went after them, because once we'd seen James walk right by us, Kelly and I were definitely off in Happy La La Land that involved needing James to be onstage immediately and it was all we could think about.

When finally he did get onstage, the crowd went predictably insane. Oh, and did I mention he looked fantastic? Good goddess, his arms are just…mmm. Watching him play guitar damn near killed me. A guitar can make even the homeliest people look 100% better, but with James, it turned him into a freaking god. I can't recall the entire set list - if someone else has it up online, I'll likely add it here later - but he did play 'Dangerous', which is one of the ones I'd been most vehemently hoping for. He also explained that 'Katie' was about his having been in love with a lesbian, which made the song somehow all the better. He played 'Fall of Night', which is definitely a favorite, and a lot of the new stuff he played was really, really amazing. I think the entire crowd could've done without hearing 'Poor Robyn', because I don't know a single person that likes that song, but he was still pretty to look at whilst singing it. The show was just fantastic. You can tell he's really been trying to work on his music, trying to better himself and his lyrics and whatnot. He's admitted he's not proud of his earlier stuff, but it's easy to see that he's definitely getting better. He also played both 'Bad' and 'No Promises', during which I freaked out because they're both so awesome. And 'For What I Need' had me in a state of near-orgasmic bliss. It was just heaven. Kelly was hoping for a Nirvana cover, but it didn't happen. Yet.

The second show was even better. We were in line waiting for maybe another hour or less, and a lot more people showed up to it than the first. During the second show, we made some friends that totally would change the course of the evening for us. Behind us were Bernadette and Amy, who are awesome beyond all possible words. And in front of us were Ivy, Molly and Erika, who I just have to say here are the coolest chicks in the entire world and because of Ivy I now have three wives. : - ) Anyway, the first opening act was named Blake Ian, and he was really impressive, very charismatic, fantastic voice, amazing skill, and his cover of 'Hallelujah' had me near tears. Dan Conklin was next, and he was pretty cool. He did a funny compilation of various rap songs that endeared him to the audience, which was difficult as Blake had totally captured everyone's hearts. Then after Dan came James.

The vibe of the second show was crazier than the first. I was third row center, and Kelly was a spot or two to the left of me. James came out and I swear, he had to have felt like a Beatle. People went INSANE. Seeing him just made people lose their damn minds. It was fantastic beyond all words. I think he started out with 'Every Man Thinks God is On Their Side', if I recall correctly. He played 'Poor Robyn' again, which made everyone kinda roll their eyes, but not as much as we all did when he played 'Patricia'. (And it's not just because we don't much like Patricia. It's also because the song's just bad, in all honestly.) Even after the lesser liked songs, everyone still freaked out and screamed their throats raw. And Kelly still had her fingers crossed for a Nirvana cover. At some point, James made the comment that it felt like 'impending orgy energy' in there, and everyone loved that idea. And he played 'Dangerous' again at some point, which was the best thing ever. Bernadette bought me a Screwdriver, which I chugged. Not the most brilliant idea as I hadn't eaten all day, and it led me to a state of slight inebriation. Not bad, but just that buzzy pleasant feeling. Which probably was what led me to flash James.

He'd been giving sexy, Spike-like smirks to people throughout the whole show, about every ten seconds or so. He was definitely in a playful mood. Ivy and co. said I should definitely flash him, so I couldn't resist. During 'For What I Need' I did so, and at first he didn't notice. The girls called his name, calling his attention to it, and he gave me an eyebrow raise and the most gorgeous, lascivious grin I've ever seen in my life. It was unbelievably awesome. Also, the first time I'd ever actually flashed someone at a concert, if you can believe that. With all my groupie shit over the years, you think it would've happened by now, but nope. James is the first person I've flashed in concert. Yay!

The rest of the show was just indescribably amazing, as one imagines it would be. He was right, too - the energy of it was maddeningly and frustratingly sexual. I was sweating in places I didn't even know I'd had. Watching his hands on the guitar, hearing that growl he gets in his voice…Guh. That's all I have to say, is 'guh.'

After the show, our little crowd went out for cigarettes, and took a group picture of all of us. We also noticed a whole bunch of people congregating by the back door and figured, why not? We wandered over there, hung out for a bit, but James was a no-show. Instead, he left out the front or some side door, in a limo. We noticed a bunch of girls heading towards the front, and saw the limo, and James' waving hand, as it disappeared out of the parking lot.

Normal people, when a limousine's leaving a venue, would figure it's all over and it's time to go home.

I and the people I consider friends, are not and have never been normal people.



Ivy, Molly, Erika, Kelly and I piled into Ivy's car and gave chase. It ended up pretty hilariously. We blasted the Civilized Man album as we did our best to follow the limo, and at one point, we did catch up to it. We pulled up alongside it and screamed and waved and blew kisses…and then it turned off onto an exit.

I don't recall the order in which everything happened, but here were the highlights:

-making a turn onto an exit so hard and fast that we almost tipped the car over.
-blaring the 'Once More with Feeling' CD and singing it all the way through.
-almost dying again by going the wrong way down a one-way expressway.
-some random druggie hitting on us at a gas station.
-our fearless leader of a driver having to stop and pee in unconventional places.
-yelling really obscene things whilst in the tunnel.
-a discussion about radar and navels. ("Innie or outtie?" In unison: "Innie." God, we're insane. I miss you girls already!)
-theories about what James was doing right at that moment. (Girls, keep reading - we guessed correctly.)

Essentially, we took a vaguely circuitous route that ended up being our undoing. Remember, we started out in Long Island. I'm pretty sure we spent some time in Brooklyn, Queens, Staten Island at one point, we circled Manhattan, might've almost driven into the ocean, almost drove into a building, and were looking around for Jersey while we were actually IN Jersey but didn't know it until we were getting back on the tunnel for NYC. By then it was around 2 AM and we all looked at each other with bittersweet smiles as we called it quits, but at least we had made a damn good attempt. And even though we didn't catch up to him, we still had the most ridiculous amount of giggly fun that will never be forgotten.



(Kelly's map of our adventures. Yes, we know we're morons.)

We got back into Manhattan around four in the morning, found some crap food to content our empty stomachs, and got insanely lost. Once again, ladies, thanks for driving us all the way back to where we needed to be. You guys are awesome and we love you!!! (Also, as a side note, dunno if you guys checked a map at all, but Kelly and I did, and I swear to goddess, we were a mere two miles off at one point. -Facepalm.-)

I don't remember what time we fell asleep. I didn't WANT to fall asleep, as that would mean that awesome day really had ended. But sleep was necessary, and eventually did occur.

SUNDAY.

We had about five hours of sleep before rising again, checking out of our hostel room and once more heading to Port Authority to catch the bus to Jersey. I wore my red and black corset and a black mini-skirt with lace on it. (Why I bothered to even pack two pairs of pants, I have no clue, because I didn't wear any of them. I should've figured just to bring my whoredrobe.)

When we got to the convention, an auction was going on in the auditorium. They auctioned off signed pics from all sorts of fandoms. Lastly, they were trying to get some decent money for a beautiful black electric guitar that had been signed by every convention guest from this con and the one in L.A. When it wasn't selling for enough, James stepped out from behind the partition where he was waiting to start signing, and picked up the guitar. And then, Kelly finally got Nirvana. He played "All Apologies". She was about to have a heart attack over it. I was about to have a heart attack just getting to see him play an electric. (Somehow it's even sexier than seeing him with an acoustic.)

James' schedule at the convention ran a little differently this time. First was his signing, then the photo op, then the panel. I didn't have money for the signing, but I still wanted him to autograph me so I could get it tattooed. Kelly sold back the magazines she bought on a vendor for Friday, and with three extra dollars I bummed from random guys, we had enough money for a signing ticket. We met a really cool girl named Angela in line, and she had the cutest southern accent. When at last we got up to James, we all just kinda stood there and sighed happily. He was wearing a long-sleeved black tee and looked, as always, fantastic. One woman who worked there, Tammy, told us the view was best from the fire extinguisher just across from James' table, and she was right. He was right in front of us, there to gaze at as the line continued on. When we got up there, Kelly thanked him for playing Nirvana, and he went on to talk about turning pain into beauty through music, and we just kinda nodded adoringly. I mean, of course I agree with it, but we just didn't have much to say. (I could've mentioned both he and Kurt having something in common along the lines of really stupid girlfriends, but decided against it. Ahem.)

I asked him to sign my arm so I could get it tattooed, and we deliberated over what angle it should be at. He took a long time on the signature, making it perfect, and then I got a hug from him. He kissed me on the far side of my cheek, closer to where my ear and jawbone meet, and I did the same to him. (Oh, and Heather, you're right - he does smell pretty!) After the hug, I told him, "Oh, and thanks for appreciating my flashing you last night." He grinned and told me it was sexy, and as I walked away, he did the head tilt and gave me the once-over. I grinned and blew him a kiss, and walked away to another trillion cigarettes.

The panel was even funnier and more entertaining than the first one. One woman asked him about a very detailed feminist question he'd talked about on Friday, and as much as he loves arguments, everyone pretty much thought he and the woman were gonna really get into it. One girl asked about puppet Angel and puppet Spike getting into a fight, and another girl asked about a comment someone made about him not having an ass. I had a question, and Kelly and I debated how he would answer - blushing and making up a lie, or being honest. So I went up there and asked, "You said your pre-show ritual is usually sitting around being nervous, and during last night's show you said something about it feeling like impending orgy energy." He laughed and nodded, likely having a feeling what was coming, and I continued, "After shows like that, what's your after-show ritual?"

He gave me a grin with a hint of the tongue, rather like the one when I'd flashed him the night before, and said with all the confidence in the world, "Masturbation!" The audience cheered and James is like, "I'm not lying." It was just fabulous.

As a side note, I've come to the decision that James himself is sexier than Spike. It's a pretty lofty thing to say, and something I'm even surprised by, but yeah. James is way sexier to me than Spike is, and I fucking love Spike. So, yeah. Anyway.

James' PR guy/road manager Steve came out to ask James why he'd been so frisky/flirtatious this weekend. Now, this was something I'd heard from the other women who'd seen him several times - that he wasn't usually this playful and sexual and frisky with everyone. James' comment was that he wasn't sure, just the kind of mood he was in, or maybe it was because nobody had tried to grab his ass that weekend. Either way, I just wanted to thank anyone who had a copy of my sigil this weekend and was sending it interesting energy. Might've been at least part of the cause. : - )

The rest of the panel passed pretty quickly. Near the end, he made some comment about having to get to the airport for a cavity search before heading to London. A few minutes later, Steve came out with a plastic glove on his hand, trying to lure James off the stage. The crowd cheered riotously as he left, and that was that.

We stepped outside for more smoking and noticed that, since there was a large crowd of people near the front door, he likely wasn't going to take that route out. We walked quite far away from the doors of the center, to sit on this small mound of grass across from a fire extinguisher, near the only possible vehicle exit. We lit cigarettes and relaxed, and out of the blue, this cab rolls up. It slowed down, and James had the window rolled down. He said goodbye and thanked us for coming. I was speechless. Like, when I'm expecting to see him, I can plan for it, but he just rolled up out of bloody nowhere, grinning that sexy grin and wearing that gorgeous brown leather jacket…Kelly managed to say, "We love you!" The car started pulling away and he yelled back, "I love you, too!" She also somehow managed, "Have a safe trip!" and he waved as the cab drove away. We were likely the last people from the convention to see him, and it was a perfect ending to a whole weekend spent in his presence.

The cab had idled so close to us, there was a lot I could've said or done had I prepared for it, I'm sure. But I just FROZE, which really never happens to me. I replay it in my head and it's in slow motion, and I'm just sitting there waving like a moron…Agh. Still, it was awesome, as the entire weekend was. Either way, we decided that DragonCon in the fall was most certainly a necessity.

We needed food and almost got stuck on the elevator when headed up to the fourth floor of the hotel, and then found Amy from the night before and smoked cigarettes with her. Kelly and I went in and sat down to listen to Voltaire, whose music is like a cross between HIM and Stephen Lynch in regards to vampire content and hilarity. (www.myspace.com/voltairenyc) He was utterly hilarious, and we ended up riding on the same bus with him back to Manhattan. He gave me a free live CD, and he said he'd be at DragonCon as well.

The rest of the trip isn't even worth discussing, as it involves far too many hours trying to fall asleep in an Arctic Tundra of an airport terminal. But despite that comedown of a sobering, frustrating experience, the weekend was sheer perfection. James is one of the most vibrant, kind, sweet, intelligent and beautiful-inside-and-out individuals I've ever met, and I can't wait to do it all again at DragonCon in two months!!!

Also, I took this with a cameraphone so it's not great, but I got James' signature tattooed on my arm! Here's the pic: