Live a Lie
[Title] Live a Lie
[Prompt] 100. Regrets [WC]
[Characters] Donghae/Hankyung, EunHae, HanChul
[Rating] G
[Words] 1191
[Summary] So he stays and he smiles and he says the words, all the while imagining that it’s someone else entirely that he’s speaking to.
[Disclaimer] Not mine. Not mine. Not mine. Not mine. Not mine. Need I say more?
[Notes] For the 100 Super Junior Fics Challenge. Angst.
[Archive] here
Lee Donghae stares at the sight before him. He watches as both men clasp their hands together and sees the smile on their faces. He can feel, more than see, their happiness as they stare at each other's eyes. He hears one of them laugh - an unforced laugh, honest and out of pure joy - and then the other leans in and whispers something to his ear. Donghae doesn't need to hear what he's saying. From the way the other man's eyes light up, he knows. He can practically hear it with his own ears.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
He hears everyone else around them start to tease the couple and Donghae hears himself speak, joining in on poking fun of the two. Donghae can barely feel the fake smile he plasters on his face. He has no worries of anyone seeing through his façade; it is one that came with years of practice.
He feels someone approach him and clasp on to his hand. Donghae stiffens for the briefest moment before forcing himself to relax. "All right, all right. Heechul-hyung, stop molesting Hankyung-hyung in front of everyone," the man holding his hand jokes with a small laugh.
Feeling Donghae's eyes on him, he turns to the boy, eyes still filled with amusement. "You okay?" he asks, a hint of concern behind his gummy smile. Donghae nods to assure him, fake smile never leaving his face.
Busy looking at the couple in front of him, Donghae barely registers the tug on his hand until he finds himself pressed up with the body beside him. He can feel the breath on his ear and their hearts beating together.
He can hear the words being whispered softly into his ear.
I love you.
Donghae smiles, leans in closer to the warm body next to his, and whispers the same words back. He sees the happiness in those eyes and sees the smile spread in those lip. Donghae tries not to hate himself as he pretends that those are someone else's eyes staring deeply into his and someone else's lips whispering those loving words and someone else arms wrapped safely around his waist.
---
Hankyung stares at the sight before him. He is aware of the jokes that the others throw his way because of Heechul's displays of affection, but he can barely hear their words. He is too busy staring at the couple in the corner of the room, lost in their own little world.
He watches as they lean on one another and as arms slowly encircle each other. He sees the older boy lean in to whisper words to the other's ear and watches as those words bring a heartbreakingly sweet smile on the younger boy's face. He watches the happiness dance in their eyes as they speak softly to one another, away from the scrutiny of their friends.
"Donghae and Eunhyuk sure look comfy together, don't they?" Hankyung startles as Heechul softly whispers in his ear. He nods softly and tries to pry his eyes away from the couple. "How about we have them come here?" And before Hankyung can say anything to stop him, Heechul goes over to the couple and pulls them to the center of the room.
Satisfied with taking everyone's eyes off of him and his boyfriend, Heechul goes back to Hankyung's side. He grabs Hankyung's arms and places it around his waist, then places his own on Hankyung's shoulders. Heechul pulls the two of the closer together and slowly teases Hankyung's lips with his own before kissing the other man.
Leaning on his shoulder, Heechul sighs quietly and starts playing with his hair. Hankyung can feel the fingers on his hair and the warm breath on his ear, but his eyes are still drawn to the couple at the center of the room. He hears Heechul call his name and he looks at the man in his arms.
Heechul leans in and whispers softly into his ear.
I love you.
Hankyung smiles and whispers those same words back. He leans in closer, closes his eyes, and fights the guilt that tries to overcome him as he imagines someone else's arms around him and someone else's lips on his and someone else's ears hearing his words.
---
Donghae remains in Eunhyuk's arms, keeping his eyes closed so he doesn't have to see Hankyung in Heechul's arms.
Donghae knows that he only has himself to blame with how things turned out. Donghae knows he loved Hankyung far longer than Heechul did. He knows because he remembers the exact day that Heechul came up to him and told him that he was going to confess to Hankyung. Donghae remembers feeling confused, because he loved Hankyung and having Heechul love Hankyung too would create too much confusion and hurt for everyone involved.
Donghae remembers telling Heechul to go for it, fake smile already fixed on his face. Donghae remembers the look on Heechul's face when Hankyung agreed. More importantly, Donghae remembers the look on Hankyung's face when Heechul asked. The pure joy in those eyes told Donghae that he had already lost his chance. Hankyung already belonged to Heechul.
---
Hankyung keeps his arms around Heechul, his head still leaning on the older man's shoulder. Hankyung refuses to look up because he doesn't want to see Donghae in Eunhyuk's arms. Not when he knows that it should be him holding on to Donghae like that. Not when he knows that it's his fault that Donghae now belongs to someone else.
Hankyung remembers when Heechul told him how he felt. What Hankyung doesn't remember is what made him react the way he did. His only reasoning is that maybe it will finally make Donghae take notice.
Hankyung remembers when Eunhyuk approached everyone in the group, asking how he should confess his feelings to Donghae. He came to Hankyung last, after getting no advice from anyone else. At least nothing useful. Hankyung told him to just go for it, and looking back at it, Hankyung wants to beat his past self against the wall for his suggestion. But Hankyung was with Heechul and Donghae wasn't his, so who was he to stand in the way?
Hankyung remembers when Eunhyuk finally built his courage up and told the younger boy how he felt. The look of nervousness on Eunhyuk's face was offset by the look of happiness on Donghae's. It was at that time that Hankyung knew that he never stood a chance. Donghae already belonged to Eunhyuk.
---
Donghae knows it's not fair to Eunhyuk, but he knows that saying anything will hurt his best friend more than his silence ever could. So he stays and he smiles and he says the words, all the while pretending that it's someone else entirely that he's speaking to.
---
Hankyung knows it's not fair to Heechul, but he knows that saying anything will hurt his best friend more than his silence ever could. So he stays and he smiles and he says the words, all the while imagining that it's someone else entirely that he's speaking to.
-End-
11.01.08 / 11.08.08
So, I think I distinctly remember saying last time that my next HanHae would be happy. Clearly, I failed. D:
um...next time? ^^;;
[Prompt] 100. Regrets [WC]
[Characters] Donghae/Hankyung, EunHae, HanChul
[Rating] G
[Words] 1191
[Summary] So he stays and he smiles and he says the words, all the while imagining that it’s someone else entirely that he’s speaking to.
[Disclaimer] Not mine. Not mine. Not mine. Not mine. Not mine. Need I say more?
[Notes] For the 100 Super Junior Fics Challenge. Angst.
[Archive] here
Lee Donghae stares at the sight before him. He watches as both men clasp their hands together and sees the smile on their faces. He can feel, more than see, their happiness as they stare at each other's eyes. He hears one of them laugh - an unforced laugh, honest and out of pure joy - and then the other leans in and whispers something to his ear. Donghae doesn't need to hear what he's saying. From the way the other man's eyes light up, he knows. He can practically hear it with his own ears.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
He hears everyone else around them start to tease the couple and Donghae hears himself speak, joining in on poking fun of the two. Donghae can barely feel the fake smile he plasters on his face. He has no worries of anyone seeing through his façade; it is one that came with years of practice.
He feels someone approach him and clasp on to his hand. Donghae stiffens for the briefest moment before forcing himself to relax. "All right, all right. Heechul-hyung, stop molesting Hankyung-hyung in front of everyone," the man holding his hand jokes with a small laugh.
Feeling Donghae's eyes on him, he turns to the boy, eyes still filled with amusement. "You okay?" he asks, a hint of concern behind his gummy smile. Donghae nods to assure him, fake smile never leaving his face.
Busy looking at the couple in front of him, Donghae barely registers the tug on his hand until he finds himself pressed up with the body beside him. He can feel the breath on his ear and their hearts beating together.
He can hear the words being whispered softly into his ear.
I love you.
Donghae smiles, leans in closer to the warm body next to his, and whispers the same words back. He sees the happiness in those eyes and sees the smile spread in those lip. Donghae tries not to hate himself as he pretends that those are someone else's eyes staring deeply into his and someone else's lips whispering those loving words and someone else arms wrapped safely around his waist.
---
Hankyung stares at the sight before him. He is aware of the jokes that the others throw his way because of Heechul's displays of affection, but he can barely hear their words. He is too busy staring at the couple in the corner of the room, lost in their own little world.
He watches as they lean on one another and as arms slowly encircle each other. He sees the older boy lean in to whisper words to the other's ear and watches as those words bring a heartbreakingly sweet smile on the younger boy's face. He watches the happiness dance in their eyes as they speak softly to one another, away from the scrutiny of their friends.
"Donghae and Eunhyuk sure look comfy together, don't they?" Hankyung startles as Heechul softly whispers in his ear. He nods softly and tries to pry his eyes away from the couple. "How about we have them come here?" And before Hankyung can say anything to stop him, Heechul goes over to the couple and pulls them to the center of the room.
Satisfied with taking everyone's eyes off of him and his boyfriend, Heechul goes back to Hankyung's side. He grabs Hankyung's arms and places it around his waist, then places his own on Hankyung's shoulders. Heechul pulls the two of the closer together and slowly teases Hankyung's lips with his own before kissing the other man.
Leaning on his shoulder, Heechul sighs quietly and starts playing with his hair. Hankyung can feel the fingers on his hair and the warm breath on his ear, but his eyes are still drawn to the couple at the center of the room. He hears Heechul call his name and he looks at the man in his arms.
Heechul leans in and whispers softly into his ear.
I love you.
Hankyung smiles and whispers those same words back. He leans in closer, closes his eyes, and fights the guilt that tries to overcome him as he imagines someone else's arms around him and someone else's lips on his and someone else's ears hearing his words.
---
Donghae remains in Eunhyuk's arms, keeping his eyes closed so he doesn't have to see Hankyung in Heechul's arms.
Donghae knows that he only has himself to blame with how things turned out. Donghae knows he loved Hankyung far longer than Heechul did. He knows because he remembers the exact day that Heechul came up to him and told him that he was going to confess to Hankyung. Donghae remembers feeling confused, because he loved Hankyung and having Heechul love Hankyung too would create too much confusion and hurt for everyone involved.
Donghae remembers telling Heechul to go for it, fake smile already fixed on his face. Donghae remembers the look on Heechul's face when Hankyung agreed. More importantly, Donghae remembers the look on Hankyung's face when Heechul asked. The pure joy in those eyes told Donghae that he had already lost his chance. Hankyung already belonged to Heechul.
---
Hankyung keeps his arms around Heechul, his head still leaning on the older man's shoulder. Hankyung refuses to look up because he doesn't want to see Donghae in Eunhyuk's arms. Not when he knows that it should be him holding on to Donghae like that. Not when he knows that it's his fault that Donghae now belongs to someone else.
Hankyung remembers when Heechul told him how he felt. What Hankyung doesn't remember is what made him react the way he did. His only reasoning is that maybe it will finally make Donghae take notice.
Hankyung remembers when Eunhyuk approached everyone in the group, asking how he should confess his feelings to Donghae. He came to Hankyung last, after getting no advice from anyone else. At least nothing useful. Hankyung told him to just go for it, and looking back at it, Hankyung wants to beat his past self against the wall for his suggestion. But Hankyung was with Heechul and Donghae wasn't his, so who was he to stand in the way?
Hankyung remembers when Eunhyuk finally built his courage up and told the younger boy how he felt. The look of nervousness on Eunhyuk's face was offset by the look of happiness on Donghae's. It was at that time that Hankyung knew that he never stood a chance. Donghae already belonged to Eunhyuk.
---
Donghae knows it's not fair to Eunhyuk, but he knows that saying anything will hurt his best friend more than his silence ever could. So he stays and he smiles and he says the words, all the while pretending that it's someone else entirely that he's speaking to.
---
Hankyung knows it's not fair to Heechul, but he knows that saying anything will hurt his best friend more than his silence ever could. So he stays and he smiles and he says the words, all the while imagining that it's someone else entirely that he's speaking to.
-End-
11.01.08 / 11.08.08
So, I think I distinctly remember saying last time that my next HanHae would be happy. Clearly, I failed. D:
um...next time? ^^;;