(One-Shot) The Unfinished Green Tea Latte
Title: The Unfinished Green Tea Latte
Author: nikenyk
Pairing: Inoobu
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst
Summary: It all started with a green tea latte, and also ended with it.
I still remember it clearly, the day you walk into my life. You opened the door and enter along with the light.
I also mean it literally, since the time you enter my life, was also the same time you enter the café I was working at. Yeah, you come along with light outside and brought warmth.
**
Cling. The bell on the door ringing.
The me who was focusing on the cashier looked up and smiling, greeting the customer who’s coming in.
“Welcome!” I said.
The light from the outside was blinding, that I couldn’t see who’s coming in. Whether it’s a man or woman. But I could faintly see the movement on his/her head, like he/she was nodding in response.
The customer then step from the door and slowly closing the door behind, covering the light from outside and uncover the customer as a man, and his respond wasn’t just a nod, he also smiled.
He walked through the aisle and chose to sit right beside the big glass window. He placed all his belonging and gesturing the waiter to come, and I come.
This is just an ordinary thing in the café. Someone walks in and we greeted them. And then they respond with nod or smile. But I never know, that the exact ordinary thing happened that day with that man, leads me to such a life.
**
“How may I help you?” I politely ask as I placed the menu list on his table.
“Green tea latte please.” He answered.
“Okay, 1 green tea latte.” I confirmed his order and walked back to the counter and pass the order to my friend. After 5 minutes, the order already done and I took it to the customer.
“Here you go, your green tea latte.” I said as I put the cup on the table. The customer has already opened his laptop and was writing on it. He heard me and instantly stopped his doing and took his latte closer to him.
“Thank you.” He smiled. “Ah, I want to order one more thing.” He said and he tried to reach the menu I placed on his table. I was about to help him when suddenly his hand accidentally shoved his latte.
And it all happened in a blink, yet felt so much like a slow motion.
He shoved his latte and the cup fell.. and spilled onto his laptop… yet, almost. Somehow, the customer fastly push his laptop to prevent the latte fall on it, and he succeeded on that. Yet, the latte spilled on the table and fell on him, drenching his pants.
And after that slow motion moment, none of us moved.
We could only blink.
I was the one who broke the freeze between us first. I quickly took the tissue on the table and handed him.
“Here, tissue, tissue.” I said panickly, yet he still frozen.
“Ah, yeah yeah.” He finally said. He took the tissue from me and tried clean the latte from his pants, but still absentmindedly.
“AH!!! I have a very important meeting after this!!” the customer said in panic. Seemed like he already back to his sense and finally grasp the situation. “Doushiyou…” He mumbled now and then.
He looked so clumsy and panic, it was such a scene to see and I almost laugh because of this very funny scene. His face looked like a puppy, really.
“A.. ano, if you don’t mind, you can clean your pants here” I offered him in murmur.
“Eh?” The customer looked up.
“Yes, we have washing machine here, if you don’t mind.” I explained.
“Oh yeah yeah that’s a relief!” He exclaimed. “But.. is it okay for the customer to do that here? Won’t your boss be mad at you?” He asked. I could see in his eyes that he really mean it and not just a formality about worrying me get scold from the boss.
“It’s okay.. nee you see, I’m the owner of this café.”
“Ah sou. Okay then, sorry for troubling.” He stood up and bow.
“Okay, this way please.” I said and lead the way to the back of the café, and he followed.
The café wasn’t s big. It was originally my house but I turned it into a half café. My mother and father decided to live on the countryside on their retirement days, so I have this house for myself and turned half of this house into a mini café.
Yep, it’s a mini café. It only could serve several customers but I guaranteed its comfort. And since it’s small, I don’t need much people to work here. There’s only 4 person here. Me, Hikaru, Dai-chan and Takaki. They all are my frends. Dai-chan took the afternoon shifts, Hikaru and Takaki took the night shift, while I’m here on time. And mostly, all the orders were made by me. But now, everyone could already made the drink and food just like what I made.
“Here is the machine, just use it okay.” I showed him. “Ah, just take your time okay, I’m going back to the café.” He nodded and I step back. “Oh and you can use this towel while you have your pants cleaned.” I took the clean towel from the counter and handed him, then I quickly left him before he could answer.
It’s not that I harsh to him, I’m just giving him privacy quickly, since he need to get his pants cleaned quickly before it’s noon already. And I just remembered this thing. He was a stranger. What if he was a thief and took my things with him? What if he was a criminal? But I let those thought slide and focusing on my work. He doesn’t look bad, he looked so pure and I don’t think he was a criminal.
I walked inside the café and saw Dai-chan on the cashier.
“I’ve already cleaned the mess.” He said.
“Whoa, thank you Dai-chan. I’m sorry for having you clean that though.” I tapped his shoulder.
“No prob.” He said. “And by the way, who was he? A friend of yours?”
“Hmm.. no, and I don’t know who he is.”
Dai-chan’s eyes went wide and he stepped closer to me. “Is it okay to have stranger inside your house???” He asked in whisper, but I know for sure that he restraining himself from shouting.
“Nah, it’s okay, I believe him.” I answered him. “Hey you want to be on the cashier or the counter now?” Now is my turn to change
the topic and ask him.
“Can I be on the cashier?” Dai-chan smiled sheepishly. He really is a naïve person.
“Yeah you can. Then I’m going to the counter.”
“Yossha! Let’s get to work!”
**
Dai-chan knew quite well that I love to be in the counter, that’s why he chose to be the cashier.
After approx 30 minutes, The customer came from the back of the café and called for me.
“Ah anoo.. my pants already clean, thank you for your help!” He bowed to me again.
“Glad we can help you.” I answered him and smiled.
“ah.. thank you very much.” He bowed again.
“Hey, don’t be like that... if you keep bowing down to me, I’ll feel like an ojii-san.” I said to him, trying to ease his tension.
“AH yeah.. yeah… umm.. by the way.. can I come again, toworrow? To the café?” He asked slowly, seemed so unsure of what he said. Or maybe he was afraid.
“It’s okay, and please do become our regular, ‘kay.”
“Yokatta… I don’t know how many more lattes I’ll spill tho.” And then he finally chuckle.
“About that, please don’t” I chuckle back.
“Ja, I’ll go back to my table now.”
**
On the next day, he came like he promised before.
And the same like the day before, he ordered green tea latte. But fortunately, the latte wasn’t spilled and he can enjoyed the taste. ‘oishi’ he praised, and Dai-chan’s face turned bright since he was the one who made it. ‘Yabu can make a tastier one.’ Dai-chan said and his response was ‘hontou? This is already so good! I wonder how Yabu-san’s taste. Ne, tomorrow, make it for me ‘kay.’ He said with brimming eyes.
And so, now I have my hand full to make his green tea latte. He came again today, and he sit on the cashier. He didn’t order anything, he simply winking his eyes and I know already what he mean.
“Hai hai.” I answered him and proceeded his latte.
He watched how I made his latte thoroughly and ‘whoa’-ing now and then.
“It looked like a magic, Yabu-san…” He said.
“You’re praising too much.” I chuckle.
“Hey I’m serious haha.”
I worked on his latte and it is near its finish. Since he was a new friend of mine and specially request my latte, I gave him a bonus that I rarely gave to my customer. A latte art.
“Here you go.. your latte.” I handed him the latte form the back of the counter and I can saw it clearly. His face turned to awe.
“Th-this is… whoa! Kakkee!” He exclaimed. “Yabu-san you made this??? Whoa It’s my first time to have a latte art! And it’s a house!” He looked so cheerfull and it made me glad I made it for him.
“Yeah this is a house. And since you look like a nice person, I gave you this house. And you can think this café as a home, if you want.” I said, explaining why I gave him a house on his latte.
“Whoa! I thought you gave me a house because you know that I’m majoring in architect.. but the reason turned out to be more wonderful hahaha. Thank you Yabu-san. So now can I say ‘tadaima’ everytime I come here?”
“Then.. ‘o-ka-e-ri’, Inoo-chan. It shouldn’t be this formal if you speak to someone from the same house.”
“Hahahaha, okay no more -san to Yabu-san! And can I also call Arioka-san as Dai-chan?” He asked.
“Yeah you can Inoo-chan!” Dai-chan shouted from the cashier and we both laugh hearing it.
**
The ‘tadaima’ and ‘okaeri’ tradition started on the next day. He come on the same time like the day before and seems like it already become his habit to come on the same time to our café. From then he always come, almost everyday. And he always ordered green tea latte, and sometime when the day is not so cold, and he came on the afternoon, he ordered the iced one. But then he claimed that he doesn’t really like the iced latte one because he couldn’t have the latte art on it. And somehow it made Dai-chan pissed off and on the next day Dai-chan asked me to teach him how to make one. Dai-chan then showed his latte art to Inoo-chan and Inoo-chan praised Dai-chan happily.
Inoo-chan is not a stranger anymore to me and Dai-chan. We already become friends, bestfriends even and we are so proud of this friendship. We already know each other very well and we know what each other liked and disliked. Everything was so much fun.
And finally, for the first time, Inoo-chan came to the café in the evening.
“Tadai…..”
“Welcome!” Takaki said as Inoo-chan enter the café. But hearing ‘tadaima’, Takaki became surprised.
“Hey hey hey hey, are you Inoo-chan?” Hikaru suddenly already stood so close to him.
“AH… yeah…” Inoo answered.
“Oy Takaki! This is the Inoo-chan Yabu always talk about!” Hikaru shouted freely because the café wasn’t crowded.
“Oy!” I shouted from the counter.
“Hahaha, gotcha!” Hikaru winked to me. “Ne Inoo-chan, we already reserved your place, please come this way.” Hikaru lead and Inoo-chan followed. He already know that his table will be on the counter and comfortably put his bag on the counter once he arrived.
“Your place is here, Inoo-chan, in fro not Ya-bu-chan<3” Hikaru joked and went off before I could smack him down.
Inoo-chan watched Hikaru went off and blinked hard. He then face me with a frustrated face, like he was demanding some explanation.
“It’s your first time here, right Inoo-chan? That’s why you didn’t see Dai-chan here and see that clown over there.” I explained.
“Hey, I’m not a clown, Yabu-chan~” Hikaru suddenly appeared behind me and I was surprised.
“Oy! Hikaru!” I shouted, almost mad at him, but on the contrary Inoo-chan laughed.
“Hahahhaa.. yappari… this café is the best!” He laughed.
Inoo-chan laughed for a while, and I glad to see it. Somehow, when he first came in today, I couldn’t sense any happiness from him. Like he was so frustrated with something outside. But well, thanks to Hikaru he laughed like this. After that, I introduced Hikaru and Takaki to Inoo-chan, and it went well. They talked together like they already friends in their life although they just met today.
About what Hikaru said, the ‘Yabu always talk about’ part, well, it’s particularly true, but not true. It’s not just me who talks about Inoo-chan all the time, Dai-chan too. We were so excited to have a regular customer that became our friend. And to add more, Inoo-chan knows how to have fun.
This routine have been occurring for one months for now. Our friendship already deepened. We hang out together twice. One with Dai-chan, and one with Hikaru and Takaki, and of course I was present on those two moments. Dai-chan very clingy to Inoo-chan. He liked to be very close with Inoo-chan just like Inoo-chan is his big sister. And for Takaki, well, Inoo-chan really looked so different. He liked to bully Takaki and made fun of him. Takaki once mad at him, but never again after that time. With Hikaru, he liked to jokes together, well it’s a sight to see, since Hikaru is my childhood friend, my bestfriend, and all, and he was close with Inoo-chan, almost-to-be-my-everything.
As for me.. in this one month, we also get our friendship deepened, like the other. But.. I develop this kind of feeling with him. I don’t know this kind of feeling. I’ve never felt it this way before. I feel like I want to talk to Inoo-chan all the time. I feel like not wanting him to go out of the café, I want him to be always here. Sometimes I feel some frustrating feeling whenever I see Dai-chan being close to him. Sometime I envy Takaki for making Inoo-chan out of his character like usual, and I also envy Hikaru to be able to joke with Inoo-chan like that.
I always tell everything to Hikaru. And once I tell this to Hikaru.
“Whoa! That’s love, boy!” That was Hikaru’s only respond.
And in the next second, my face became so red like a tomato.
What? I am.. in love with Inoo-chan?
Although I don’t fully believe it, I came to a theory. Maybe that’s why I never felt this way before, because I’ve never in love before this. This feeling is so new, I don’t know what to think and do anymore.
After Hikaru said that, I came to observe myself.
Cling. The rings on the door ringing, indicating someone entering.
“Tadaima”
“Okaeri.”
And it’s already obvious who’s entering.
Inoo-chan immediately sit on the usual table, on the counter in front of me. And the moment Inoo-chan being one meter ahead of me, I felt some pang in my stomach. Yet, I was able to compose myself.
“So, what do you have today?” I asked him.
“Can I have a 4 leaf clover? Today’s my presentation.” He said.
And with that, I prepared his green tea latte with a 4leaf clover art on it. I tried to focus on my work and set Inoo-chan’s thing aside. But, with his stare at me, of course I couldn’t set him aside. He was eyeing me, very intense that I feel like he wants to become one with me.
Once I’m done, I gave him his latte.
“Here you go, Inoo-chan.” I put it on his table and our eyes met.
“Thank you.” He smiled.
And that smile really alluring. I felt like myself being drawn to him and I can feel my body start to bend forward, closer to Inoo-chan. Somehow.. I want to taste that pink lumpy lips of his.
I… I…..
“Yabu! I left my phone here last night!!” All of a sudden, Hikaru entered the café and rushly came to my side.
I jumped.
I was so surprised. At Hikaru for rushing in. And for me to think… to kiss Inoo-chan. I felt my face burning.
“Yabu? Oy Yabu!” Hikaru called, pinching my cheek.
“Uruse!!” I shouted and went back to the living room where we usually left our belonging when working in the café. Hikaru followed me.
“That was close Yabu!” Hikaru laughed.
Indeed, this person was preventing me from kissing Inoo-chan.
“Glad I accidentally left my phone here last night. Or else, you wouldn’t have a decent confession to him.” HIkaru laugh more.
“Urusai.” I said coldly.
“Just tell him first Yabu, the type like Inoo-chan, perhaps liked to be confessed before being kissed.”
“Hai hai wakatta..” I said uncaringly.
We already back to the café and to the counter, right in front of Inoo-chan.
“Already got your phone, Hikaru?” Inoo-chan asked.
“Yeah, although the battery is already ran out.” Hikaru answered him. Hikaru looked so absentminded like he was thinking something else. “Nee Inoo-chan, are you free tonight?”
“Hmm… I guess I am.”
“I’m going to throw a party here.” Hikaru said.
And the first one to respond was me.
“WHAT??” I said.
“Yeah Yabu, why don’t we throw a party for Inoo-chan? A welcome party for Inoo-chan.” Hikaru explained.
“And can you please add a ‘congratulation party’ too? Today’s my big project presentation and I feel like succeeding since Yabu gave me this clover!” Inoo-chan exclaimed as he showed his latte to HIkaru.
Gulp.
Am I.. one of the reason of him being confident like this? Am I that important to him?
Hikaru nudged me with his elbow.
“Of course, Inoo-chan!” He said to Inoo. “Then it’s already settled ne, Yabu??” He faced me and tapped both of my shoulder. But in the next second he looked away. “Dai-chan you HAVE to come! Takaki will come, too!” Hikaru shouted, and ready to storm out of the café, just like the way he entered.
But before Hikaru could escaped, I reach for him and caught him.
“Hey, Hika-!”
“Someone’s gonna thank me later.” Before even letting me finish my sentence, Hikaru cut it and immediately leave.
Maybe I will.
**
The party starts after the café closed. Me, Takaki and Hikaru of course already there. Dai-chan came to the café when the café was still open, but he went straight to the living room and decorate a bit. Dai-chan also already bought some beer and snacks on the way so we didn’t have much to do about the party. Hikaru only went out to buy more beer since he thought the beer was too few. And Dai-chan also forget to brought some games, therefore, Hikaru went to buy.
The party should have been started, but still haven’t. The man of the party still haven’t come and we respect him so much that we haven’t even touch a single can of beer.
After 30 minutes, the bell on the door ringing.
“Ahh!! Sorry for being late!” Inoo-chan said.
He was panting, like he was running to get here.
“Breathe, Inoo-chan, breathe.” Hikaru said and Inoo-chan took a very deep breath.
“I was.. the presentation was success.. hah.. hah… and we already move to hah.. the next stage.. that’s.. why I’m late.. hah hah..”
“Breathe! Inoo-chan! Breath… eh? What was that? CONGRATULATION INOO-CHAN!!!” Hikaru shouted. And then we start throwing candies to him. It’s just weird. Hikaru bought candies this much to throw at Inoo-chan instead of coloured paper. ‘Because you think of Inoo as a sweet candy that you want to lick’ Hikaru said when I ask before and he got a smack from me.
And with that, the party officially started.
The party was so loud. We laughed so much and shout too much. We did some karaoke, playing games and all. And not to forget we have beer, and MUCH beer, enough to make a big elephant got drunk.
Yeah, we drank until we get tipsy that out conversation turned to nonsense. But it was fun!
The party last until 3 AM and we fell asleep together on the living room.
Although the living room was full of cans and plastic from snacks, it was comfortable and we don’t want to move from there. All 5 of us lying on the carpet, Takaki slepet right beside a couch (and why he didn’t sleep on that couch, I wonder.) And Dai-chan sleep beside Takaki, using Takaki’s tight as a pillow. Hikaru slept on the center, mumbling unknown things. I don’t even know if that’s Japanese or aliens language.
And me… I know I have to thank Hikaru later. I sleep beside Inoo-chan. Our face were so close that I could see his face clearly. I drank much, but not as much as the other three to be heavily drunk. I still have my sense. I looked at Inoo-chan’s face and captured it in my heart before I close my eyes and drift to sleep.
I was on my way to the dreamland when I suddenly hear a whisper, a very faint one that it almost hard to hear.
“Yabu, I love you.” And I know quite well who that voice belongs to.
**
The morning came finally came, but we still haven’t got enough sleep. Me, Dai-chan and Inoo-chan wake up early, despite of the headache for the hangover, and prepare the café, while HIkaru and Takaki still fast-sleeping since they having night shift. Inoo-chan helped with cleaning the living room and then he will leave for work.
I remembered very well the whisper last night, although I was drunk and sleepy. And I knew it very well that it was Inoo-chan’s voice.
Before Inoo-chan went for work, I insisted to have him sip the green tea latte. I forced him to sit on his usual place and I made his latte in front of him.
Dai-chan was being considerate with me for preparing the ingredients we’ll be using out of the café, to gave us more privacy.
“So, what do we have today, Inoo-chan?”
“Umm… I don’t.. know… I’ll leave it to you then.”
And this is my chance.
I make everything I want him to see and I served it to him once it’s finished.
He was a bit surprised when he see it.
“Ya.. Yabu….?” He looked up and see through my eyes, questioning what’s the meaning of what carved on it.
“Will you go out with me?” I asked him confidentally.
I can see his face surprised with that wide eyes. He then looked to the latte and drink it, which I assume it’s a good sign. Well, of course I have confident and I know it’s a good sign. All this time I was confused of my own feeling around him. And once I know it’s love, he whispered that word to me in my sleep., like it was a secret to begin with.
“Please go out with me.” I continued. “I love you.”
Inoo-chan took another sip and then stood up. He slowly looked up, meet my eyes, and smiled.
“Don’t.” He said. And then he left.
Leaving me with confused feeling.
And leaving the unfinished green tea latte with a heart drawn on it.
**
After that confession, Inoo-chan never came again.
It was already 1 month that he never appear on the café. Everyone were so confused and frustrated, to know that Inoo-chan never came again. They didn’t know what happen with Inoo-chan that made him never come again. Dai-chan became very sad. Inoo-chan was already a good friend of his, he even tried to search for Inoo-chan but failed. Takaki, too, although he always being bullied bt Inoo-chan, he knew that Inoo-chan is just love to joke with him. Takaki also felt lonely when Inoo-chan isn’t around and wondering why Inoo-chan gone.
The only person who know about my confession is Hikaru. I told him everything. From Inoo-chan’s whisper, until my confession where Inoo-chan just said ‘don’t’ to me. I assumed that it was the reason why Inoo-chan don’t come anymore. Hikaru said that I was overthinking about it, that Inoo-chan must have another reason and not because of it. But I can’t think of another reason.
I saw Inoo-chan’s face back then. ‘Don’t’ he said with a smile. But somehow I know, that smile was forced. His eyes were emanating the loneliness when he said that.
‘Yabu I love you..’ his voice where not funny back then. No trace of tipsy in his voice or sleepiness. I know he was serious when he said that. But why?
He didn’t reject me. He just said ‘don’t’.. which means I shouldn’t love him? But why?
He loved me, he said that. But why I shouldn’t love him?
I always wait for him to come again.
And months already passed.
**
Another year come. It has been 2 months since Inoo gone from our café.
On the 2nd day of January, we were preparing to open the café when I saw a postcard on the postbox. It was very nostalgic, and familiar. The postcard were the photo of a latte art, a house. The first latte art I made for Inoo-chan.
I flipped it and see the writing.
‘Happy new year! Thanks for being home for me!’
Indeed, it was Inoo-chan. I didn’t know that he took a photo of that first latte art I gave him, but it made my hear hurt a little. On realization of how much I didn’t notice anything about Inoo-chan. On how my latte art had become something precious to him that he capture it.
There was no name on the postcard, but I know it’s Inoo-chan. But.. there’s an address on it.
“Dai-chan, I’ll leave for a while.” And I rushed to the mentioned address.
The 2nd of January is really cold, although I already wear my coat and sweater. Yet, I ran, and let the cold wind brush my face. I could feel my lips trembling and became dry because of the cold, but my feet dragged me to even run faster, just to see his smile sooner.
The address turned to be an apartment, and it was so luxurious. I went straight to his room and press the doorbell.
The door then opened and a woman, maybe in her 40s, came out.
“Yabu-kun right? Please get in.” She said.
I was surprised that she know my name.
“You must be wondering why I know your name, right? Kei talk much about you.”
Inoo-chan talked about me?
“Kei is inside this room, please do enter.” She said and let me go inside alone.
And there he is.. confined to the bed. With tubes and machine bound to him. He was lying weakly on the bed, and once I stepped inside, he heard me and slowly turned his head to me.
“Hello Yabu.” He greeted, with the same smile.
I gulped and walk to him.
I really don’t know what to think. He was gone for months and when I finally meet him again, he was so different. He was much cheerful back then. What happened to him?
“Surprised, Yabu? This is who I really am..” He said. I walked to him and finally reach him. I sit on the chair beside the bed. “I have this severe sickness… and never will be cured.” Inoo explained. “That’s why.. you shouldn’t love me.” His eyes turned to be very lonely when he said this.
Instead, I took his hand and holding it affectionately.
“Don’t I.. disgust you? Don’t you… pity me? Don’t you want to run out of this room right now seeing me like this?” He asked me, he looked so hurt while asking that thing. This surely his fears back then, why he didn’t accept my confession back then and instead running from it. He fears.. that I would be disgust of him and ran away from him once I know this condition.
“I still.. love you.”
“Don’t, Yabu, don’t.”
“How many time you tell me not to, but I still do. I still… love you… knowing your condition.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Inoo-chan shouted.
And I was so surprised that I almost fell back with my chair.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Yabu! It’s just because you pity me!!” He shouted more.
I was really shocked, hell yes. I really didn’t know what to think or feel. I feel like my heart was already so frozen since the time I see him like this, yet, I still don’t to back away. The longing I feel, the longing to be with him, the longing to touch him, to kiss him, to always be with him, still doesn’t fade away. I know I’m still in a state of shock knowing him like this, but… I still feel love in this state.
“But I still love you!! No matter what!! No matter you reject me hundreds times, no matter you left me and gone without explanation, no matter this sickness prevent us to meet, I still love you!!” I shouted back at him, and I didn’t realize that I already stand.
I took back my chair and sit again. He was looking at me with wide eyes and his eyes already so teary. I took both of his hands and hold it firmly.
“Instead of pity.. I feel like I want to always be with you.. to be your energy.. to be you green tea latte that always cheer you up…” I trailed.
I looked up and meet his eyes, staring deeply to them as I speak my words.
“Can I?”
He holds my hand back and started to tremble. He looked down and seems like he was in agony. And then I can hear his sob.
“One month…..” I could hear his faint voice in between his sob. “One more month…. The doctor said so.” He sobbed even more, he even having difficulties saying it. Pain and agony now could be heard very clearly in his voice. And it successfully made my already frozen heart crushed and shattered in pieces.
“O.. one month…..?” I trailed.
How many shocking news should I get today? Knowing Inoo-chan’s condition already become a shock, but I still can endure it. But.. knowing my tiny Inoo-chan’s left time… I just couldn’t bear it. I feel like bursting.
“O.. one mo…nth?” I said again, almost whispering.
I slowly stood up and tried to reach Inoo-chan who crouched down and crying. I want to reach it.
I can also feel my tears start pouring. It was too hurting.
But the one who hurt the most… is Inoo-chan.
That’s why.. although in this shocking and hurting condition, I have to be the one who’s strong.. at least a bit stronger than the fragile Inoo.
I slowly approached him and start bringing him into my chest, and I embraced him.
“I still love you… no matter what..” were able to come out my mouth in a hiss, although always cut with my sob and my tears.
And instead of backing away. He gladly accepting my warm embrace, just like later he accepted me in his life. I also come into his life.. shining like a blinding light.
**
After that moment in Inoo-chan’s house, I promised him that I’ll be coming there everyday in between my working time in the café. And he accepted it, he also said that he always wanted to see me so badly, but shouldn’t and couldn’t.
He also finally accepted my love for him, and he also said in whisper that he loved me. His face were so red when saying it. He was a shy type, and I could see it clearly. And with that, we sealed our love and promise with a kiss. It was our first kiss. And it was the kiss I’ve been wanting from the time he sip my latte that day.
The kiss was so sweet, just like I always imagine. His lips, although not as red as cherry like before and had already become paler because of his sickness, still tasted like a cherry, I could feel the hint.
We kissed for a while and we finally break away. The kiss was smooth, not the passionate type-like. Yet, I could feel his love emanating from it. His love was pure, child-like and innocent. I don’t need him to be passionate lover, feeling his pure love was enough.
And after that I stayed for a while. I mailed Dai-chan that I’ll be on the café late, and I also yell him that I met Inoo-chan. After that he showered me with question about Inoo-chan and almost rush here. But I tell him to stay on the café and promise him to explain later. I also tell him to have Hikaru and Takaki come early from the afternoon, because I want to explain about Inoo-chan’s condition to everyone.
I told everything to Inoo-chan. About how we become at loss when he was gone, and he was feeling sorry of it. He then asked Dai-chan and everyone to come to his place, and of course I’ll let them know about Inoo-chan’s request.
After that we talked about everything, more than before. It was finally the time Inoo-chan opened his heart freely, not bounded like the past. We spent time together and he still do he same like before, like he was being so sick. He was looking so strong, although his face couldn’t hide its pale. But still, he was as energetic as ever.
The promised time with Dai-chan, Takaki and Hikaru finally come and I have to get back to the café. I bid my goodbye to Inoo-chan, and of course, we kissed goodbye, and then I went out of his room. There, I met his mother again and she thanked me to still accepting his son in my life, she was crying to know that I love his son no matter what.
When I reached the café, everyont were already there. The café was open and fortunately we have few cutomers that time so we could sit on the café and discussed it together. They were so hyped about it, they were delighted to know that I already met Inoo-chan and can’t wait any further for me to tell them.
I told them everything. From the day I confessed to Inoo-chan, and what happened this morning, where I received Inoo-chan’s postcard with his address on it. I told them that I rushed there and finally met Inoo-chan. Their eyes were burning with joy when I tell that. But once I told him about Inoo-chan’s true condition.. no one opened their mouth. We fall silence and our cheerfulness vanished. They couldn’t believe that Inoo-chan was sick and… dying.. in one month. They don’t want to believe it, they thought of me as joking. Hell I could joke about the death of my lovely boyfriend. The tried to absorb the truth and tried to accept it. I told them that Inoo-chan wanted to meet them and they almost run to Inoo-chan’s place. But I prevent them.
They wanted to see Inoo-chan and.. want him to spend the rest of his time with happiness with them. I told them to come there, visit Inoo-chan everyday, but not to forget their everyday life, and then they acceoted it. Dai-chan’s shift time already ended, so he could go to Inoo-chan’s place. But Takaki and Hikaru couldn’t because his shift already start. They said they wanted to go there tomorrow morning, and so they go.
Everyone come one by one, and on the second day after I met Inoo-chan, the four of us went there and as expected. Inoo-chan’s room become so noisy but Inoo-chan was laughing all he wanted. The room was full of life, the same goes with Inoo-chan.
On the third day, Inoo-chan moved to the hospital so that the doctors could monitor him everytime. And so we move our base to Inoo-chan’s house to the hospital. It was so funny how we suddenly made Inoo-chan’s room into our base after we labeled the café as our home.
The day we spent was so much fun. Inoo-chan looked so healthy and not look like a sick person at all. But sometimes, when I was with him (I spend the most time with Inoo-chan, but the other doesn’t mind it at all. They said I should be the one who be there all the time and they was OK with me almost always neglecting the café.), sometimes The doctor came and check him up. I also once see him writhing in agony, and I immediately call the doctor. But later he become fine again, and I was glad.
We sometimes kiss, and cuddle. It felt weird, cuddling in the hospital’s ward. But it was fine, as long as I could hug my Inoo-chan. We did what we wanted to do, we feel what we want to feel. I pour all my attention and love for him, and so does him.
Everytime I felt sad because of the one month time, I immediately become cheerful again once I saw Inoo-chan’s smile. As long as he smile for me, I don’t need anything else.
And life have no mercy. The time passed quickly, and we already entered the second week.
**
On the second week, we can see Inoo-chan’s condition worsen. He looked weaker and paler, but he still showed us that he was as strong and as healthy as before.
But our eyes cannot lie, we saw the truth clearly.
On this second week, he asked the doctor his special request that he will ask only once in his life.
It hurts, really. How he asked the doctor and how he said that it is his once in a lifetime request.
It would be normal if someone said ‘once in a lifetime request’ because I know they will break it, and say ‘once in a lifetime request’ again later. But it’s different with Inoo-chan.. He meant it. It’s his once in a lifetime request.. since his time is flying away.
And so the doctor gave up and let Inoo-chan do his request, but with conditions.
His request was to go out of the hospital for one day. He wanted to go to several places, but the doctor told him to just go to 2 places with car and hospital equipments on the car in case of his condition dropped. Inoo-chan accept his condition and so on the Thursday on the second week me and Inoo-chan go on a date. The doctor told us to go with a nurse but Inoo-chan reject it. He wanted us to be alone and so the doctor lost to Inoo-chan again.
We went to the disctrict with old building built there. Inoo-chan used a wheelchair, so he wouldn’t become so tired that could trigger his body to drop, and I am the one who push it. We went around the district quite long, he really love it. He liked seeing building, and I can see his eyes full of awe.
‘I always want to go here’ he said. No wonder he chose to major architecture since he loves building so much. There were also modern building in this district, and Inoo-chan’s eyes brimming again, and he talked about many things. He talked about how he loved seeing building and really want to be able to design one. ‘I want to make a house for you too, Kou..’ He said and I almost burst.
Ko-Kou.. it was the first time he called me by my name, of course I became surprise and went red.
‘Then that house should be ours, Kei.’ I answered him and he giggled. He took my hand and we stopped for a while, and feeling the warmth from our linking hands for a while.
After we went to the district, we went to the café. The second place he really want to come is the café. ‘Home’ he said. At first I thought Kei wanted to come to his house but he shook his head cutely. ‘What I mean by home is the café, Kou~ You’re so insensitive’ he said, and seeing him cute like that really made me giggle.
I rolled his wheelchair to the café’s door and he was the one who push the door.
He was proudly said ‘tadaima!’ and the 3, Dai-chan, Takaki, and Hikaru answered him happily ‘Okaeri Inoo-chan!!’ even almost shouting.
Seeing that, I could see a tiny fragment of water started to gather in Kei’s eyes.
Kei sit on his usual place, on the counter. And I stand in front of him, preparing his drink. This time, we served him a hot green tea, since he was on a special diet and the doctor prevent him to drink anything unusual. At first Kei demanded me to make him a greentea latte but I refused, and after a long argument, he gave up. He is stubborn, very stubborn.
I told everyone that Kei’s coming to the café and so they gathered here. And we talked and laughed in the café like before, like nothing happened with Kei.
It was really a good time, and I can see Kei’s eyes sparkling, it was really what he wanted for, his home and friends in it.
**
Three days after the day in the cafe, his body dropped.
It was like he was anticipating it, like he knew his body will become worse that he force the doctor to accept his request before. Like he was preparing himself, absorbing with the warmth of the outside world before he become like this.
He looked so weak, and pale. Even much more than before. He was moved to the special room where we cannot enter it freely anymore. By that time, everyone told me just to forget the café and always be with Kei.
And yeah, I gladly accepted it. And they knew very well that I really wanted to be with Kei.
I always sit beside Kei and took his hand, and he would always look at me and smiled.
It was already the third week, and Kei’s condition become worse every passing day. Dai-chan, Hikaru and Takaki came almost everyday on the third week and tried to cheer Kei. Kei of course became happy of their visit. But become happy doesn’t mean become better condition. He always look so weak, even when he was smiling.
Sometimes his body suddenly flinching and he cried out of the pain. I immediately called the doctor and the doctor will check on him. I t was already become a routine. But although it is already become a routine, everytime it happened, I can’t prevent my heart from breaking.
I hurt me to see Kei like this. I hurt to see Kei become so weak. If it can be done, I want our position to swap. I want his sickness to become mine, let me be the one who’s sick, I don’t want to see him hurting this much.
My heart is breaking in each days, it even break more knowing the time we have decreased each seconds.
It hurt, painfully hurt. I really want to cry everytime I see Kei smile, but I shouldn’t. It’s hurting enough for him that I don’t need to add more pain to him.
Because of this breaking heart, I sometime hold her hands very strong that he could feel it. He would look at me in the eye and smiled, like he knew what’s on my mind, like he was telling me not to cry.
I really want to lung forward to him and hug him, crushing him with my embrace, but the tubes and the machine preventing it.
I really want to become one… with Kei.
**
Life is cruel. Time flies in a blink and it already the end of the third week.
Kei’s already become so weak. He could barely move, but he still able to speak.. and smile. Although his voice was so low and his smile could barely seen.
I watch him everyday, seeing his body worsen and feeling my heart breaking apart everytime.
On the last day of this third week, although he could barely move.. he forcefully tried to reach my hand and hold it strongly. Strongly for him, but for me, it felt like a faint touch, he was so weak.
Seeing his struggle, I smiled to him and brushing my lips to his forehead.
‘I love you’ I mouthed and he smiled.
He opened his mouth, he was trying to say something but his voice didn’t come out. He tried once again.
“Kou…. I want… your greentea latte.” He said slowly.
I shook my head.
“The doctor forbids you to consume outside food and drink Kei.” I refused him.
“But I… really… want to have it..” He said again, still so weak.
“Still no, Kei.. is having me here not enough for you? I could be you green tea latte to cheer you up.” I reasoned.
“Please…. let me have it Kou, I really really.. want it..” His looked me into my eyes, pleading so hard.
“It will be bad for your condition.” I reasoned.
“But… I’m.. dying… anyway… Lemme have.. everything I want.” He said and again, it breaks my heart to hear him saying it. It could be the first time the words come out of his mouth. He never being so negative. He always full of positive thinking that even he will… die eventually, he always face everything with bright eyes.
I looked away, trying not shed any tear.
“Don’t say that. It’s a bad omen.” I coldly said.
“But it’s the truth.. I have no more time.. lemme have it..” He coughed. “The latte with a heart on it…. That you made on the day you confessed… I haven’t finish it.. and I always regret that I didn’t drink it until the cup’s empty…. I always…. Regret it….”
He was having difficulty of talking, but he tried his hard to say those long words.
“I want… to drink it…. That latte… that love of yours… that you pours on a cup of latte…. Kou…. I want it…..”
I bit my lip, and gave up.
“Give me 40 minutes, and I’ll be back with it.” I said and rushed out of the hospital.
I ran all my might to the café and immediately make one once I arrived. Dai-chan was surprised to see me running to the café and make a green tea latte all of a sudden, but Dai-chan understands it, why I made one.
I finished making one and pour it to the thermos to keep it warm. I took a cup and ingredients to make a latte art and shoved it in my bag. And then I start to run again to the hospital.
Once I arrived, I prepared the drink inside Kei’s room. He watched me preparing for it with kind eyes, he smiled seeing me preparing his drink, preparing the drink where I pour all of my feeling in it. I’ve done the heart art on it and I gave it a finishing touch, and then I served it to Kei.
“Here is your green tea latte, sir.” I joked.
“Thank you.” He said and I switch the bed’s button until he was sitting on it instead of lying. He then move my hand and I handed him the latte carefully.
“You… even brought the café’s… cup.” He smiled wider. He looked at the art and smiled to himself, he stared for a while and seemed like he was reminiscing the day of the confession.
I saw it clearly, the longing, the loneliness, the love from his eyes when he stared the latte. He then bring the latte closer to his lips, and sip it. I watch him carefully and on standby mode to help him with this.
“It’s.. delicious….” He said. “It’s… sweet… and it tasted so deep…” He mumbled. “And the heart.. it’s so big.” He chuckled.
I ruffeld his hair and he smiled even more.
“I can feel…. Your love in this….. latte….. Kou……” He sipped it again until half of the cup, and then he started coughing.
I took the cup from his hand and put it on the desk. I tried to soothe his cough by stroking his back. But he kept on coughing.
I tried to reach for the doctor’s botton to call him, but somehow, his hand was strong enough to stop me.
“Do… don’t….” He managed to say.
He clenched his hand on his chest and tried to steady his breath and his cough. After a while the cough stopped and his hand lying weakly on his side. I switch his bed down again until he wasn’t sitting on it. It seemed painful to him.
“That day…… I came into the café…… I never thought…. That I’ll have a miracle… on it….” He said.
“Kei… you should rest….” I said to him but he slowly shook his head.
“It was… a miracle…. To me….. to have home… as warm as that…. To have friends.. as kind as… all of you….” Although speaking seemed painful to him, he still struggling to say it.
Kei… stop it…. Don’t say things like that..
“When I… enter the café…… and when…. You enter.. my life…. You came… like a blinding light…. My life… was so dark… before… right when I… know about my… sickness…..” He said. “I hate… my sickness… I hate… my body….. I hate… my life…. But with you in it…. I feel like.. it’s a worth living…..”
I ruffled his hair and watch him closely. Our eyes always linking.
“I love you… from the.. very first… and it hurts me…. To break your heart…. When you confess…. But I have to……………..” He cough again and I soothed him. “But you…. Come to me again… and still love me with this condition…….. it… made me really happy…. Kou….” The tears start to toll on his cheeks.
Somehow it breaks my heart.. I don’t know why he said thing like this.. I feel it like a bad omen.
He tried to look afar, to the desk. And watch the latte with a lonely eyes and shed tears even more.
“Seems like…. I wasn’t able… to finish it again………” He smiled apologetically. “The latte of your…. Love….” He tried to smile even wider, but his tears now streams down like a river.
And with this, I start to cry too.
Don’t say it like that, don’t say it like that. You’ll finish it!!
But my mouth was to dry to tell things.
And then he coughed again. And then he seemed to be in agony, having a hard time to breathe.
I could only stroke his hand smoothly, not being able to do anything.
“I guess.. this is… my…. Limit…” He trailed.
And I immediately stood up to reach the button to call the doctor, and again, he took my hand. I looked at him and he was trying so hard to shook his head, but his head only move a little.
I sit again, obeying him. I took his hand and hold it firmly and kiss it desperately.
He was in pain, it was so painful to him for even to breathe. It was like something was choking him but he endured it and face me, look me in the eyes.
“I love…….. y…..” but before being able to finish his sentence, he closed his eyes.
The machine make a sound of a very long beep like there’s never an end to it.
I watch Kei’s face, although his brows were furrowed, like he was in pain, he smiled. I could only see it and hold Kei’s hand.
My tears didn’t come out anymore. It has stopped. Just like my heart feel like stopping seeing this scene.
My mind was blank and I don’t know what to think. The only think I could do is to stare at Kei’s angelic face.
I took his hand and stood up. I bent down to him and kissed his forehead.
“I love you.” I murmured to him in his ‘sleep’. Just like how he whispered to me in my sleep back then, when we started everything.
**
I still remember it clearly, the day you walk into my life. You opened the door and enter along with the light.
And I still can feel it clearly.. the day you walk out of your life, you vanished in the light. But those light.. still shining in my heart. because in there, you’re still alive, and will never fade away.
Hey.. when we meet again in our next life.. promise me you’ll finish that latte, ne.
-owari-
Note: I FORGET ON HOW TO MAKE FIC YEAH haha. I love this story but it's written badly huhu I don't think I can write a good one.
It's a quite long oneshot, almost 9k words, but please do enjoy it ne... I'll be really really happy if you do :')
oh and I must warn you that this fic is mostly narrative instead of conversation.. I'm bad at narrative and I don't know why I write it this style huehehe :B
At first when I write this, I don't know how the story will go, but I was reminded of a certain video and story and.. thenI was inspired of it. The video was a KIA Picanto Ad, but it's soo good. You can see it here-> Coversation Over Coffee and the story is here-> His Promise Wouldn't be Denied And some part of it also inspired by Jostein Gaarder's The Orange Girl.
And then... I want to say
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO TASUKU_KYOTA!!!!!!!
Happy birthday hun!!
WIsh you a good live and wish all of your wishes to be granted!!
You know how bad I am at bday greetings so don't expect me to write a good one ne :')
And one more thing... I'm sorry it's already passed, but HAPPY BIRTHDAY VTANXM!!!
I'm sorry for greeting you late! I wasn't around here for a long time hahaha!!
Wish you all the best! And wish all of your wishes to be granted!! (It's the same with the above, bleh.. I'm sorry I'm bad at things like this. :p) anyway, happy basudei!!
Okay, that's all. Ciao<3
Author: nikenyk
Pairing: Inoobu
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst
Summary: It all started with a green tea latte, and also ended with it.
I still remember it clearly, the day you walk into my life. You opened the door and enter along with the light.
I also mean it literally, since the time you enter my life, was also the same time you enter the café I was working at. Yeah, you come along with light outside and brought warmth.
**
Cling. The bell on the door ringing.
The me who was focusing on the cashier looked up and smiling, greeting the customer who’s coming in.
“Welcome!” I said.
The light from the outside was blinding, that I couldn’t see who’s coming in. Whether it’s a man or woman. But I could faintly see the movement on his/her head, like he/she was nodding in response.
The customer then step from the door and slowly closing the door behind, covering the light from outside and uncover the customer as a man, and his respond wasn’t just a nod, he also smiled.
He walked through the aisle and chose to sit right beside the big glass window. He placed all his belonging and gesturing the waiter to come, and I come.
This is just an ordinary thing in the café. Someone walks in and we greeted them. And then they respond with nod or smile. But I never know, that the exact ordinary thing happened that day with that man, leads me to such a life.
**
“How may I help you?” I politely ask as I placed the menu list on his table.
“Green tea latte please.” He answered.
“Okay, 1 green tea latte.” I confirmed his order and walked back to the counter and pass the order to my friend. After 5 minutes, the order already done and I took it to the customer.
“Here you go, your green tea latte.” I said as I put the cup on the table. The customer has already opened his laptop and was writing on it. He heard me and instantly stopped his doing and took his latte closer to him.
“Thank you.” He smiled. “Ah, I want to order one more thing.” He said and he tried to reach the menu I placed on his table. I was about to help him when suddenly his hand accidentally shoved his latte.
And it all happened in a blink, yet felt so much like a slow motion.
He shoved his latte and the cup fell.. and spilled onto his laptop… yet, almost. Somehow, the customer fastly push his laptop to prevent the latte fall on it, and he succeeded on that. Yet, the latte spilled on the table and fell on him, drenching his pants.
And after that slow motion moment, none of us moved.
We could only blink.
I was the one who broke the freeze between us first. I quickly took the tissue on the table and handed him.
“Here, tissue, tissue.” I said panickly, yet he still frozen.
“Ah, yeah yeah.” He finally said. He took the tissue from me and tried clean the latte from his pants, but still absentmindedly.
“AH!!! I have a very important meeting after this!!” the customer said in panic. Seemed like he already back to his sense and finally grasp the situation. “Doushiyou…” He mumbled now and then.
He looked so clumsy and panic, it was such a scene to see and I almost laugh because of this very funny scene. His face looked like a puppy, really.
“A.. ano, if you don’t mind, you can clean your pants here” I offered him in murmur.
“Eh?” The customer looked up.
“Yes, we have washing machine here, if you don’t mind.” I explained.
“Oh yeah yeah that’s a relief!” He exclaimed. “But.. is it okay for the customer to do that here? Won’t your boss be mad at you?” He asked. I could see in his eyes that he really mean it and not just a formality about worrying me get scold from the boss.
“It’s okay.. nee you see, I’m the owner of this café.”
“Ah sou. Okay then, sorry for troubling.” He stood up and bow.
“Okay, this way please.” I said and lead the way to the back of the café, and he followed.
The café wasn’t s big. It was originally my house but I turned it into a half café. My mother and father decided to live on the countryside on their retirement days, so I have this house for myself and turned half of this house into a mini café.
Yep, it’s a mini café. It only could serve several customers but I guaranteed its comfort. And since it’s small, I don’t need much people to work here. There’s only 4 person here. Me, Hikaru, Dai-chan and Takaki. They all are my frends. Dai-chan took the afternoon shifts, Hikaru and Takaki took the night shift, while I’m here on time. And mostly, all the orders were made by me. But now, everyone could already made the drink and food just like what I made.
“Here is the machine, just use it okay.” I showed him. “Ah, just take your time okay, I’m going back to the café.” He nodded and I step back. “Oh and you can use this towel while you have your pants cleaned.” I took the clean towel from the counter and handed him, then I quickly left him before he could answer.
It’s not that I harsh to him, I’m just giving him privacy quickly, since he need to get his pants cleaned quickly before it’s noon already. And I just remembered this thing. He was a stranger. What if he was a thief and took my things with him? What if he was a criminal? But I let those thought slide and focusing on my work. He doesn’t look bad, he looked so pure and I don’t think he was a criminal.
I walked inside the café and saw Dai-chan on the cashier.
“I’ve already cleaned the mess.” He said.
“Whoa, thank you Dai-chan. I’m sorry for having you clean that though.” I tapped his shoulder.
“No prob.” He said. “And by the way, who was he? A friend of yours?”
“Hmm.. no, and I don’t know who he is.”
Dai-chan’s eyes went wide and he stepped closer to me. “Is it okay to have stranger inside your house???” He asked in whisper, but I know for sure that he restraining himself from shouting.
“Nah, it’s okay, I believe him.” I answered him. “Hey you want to be on the cashier or the counter now?” Now is my turn to change
the topic and ask him.
“Can I be on the cashier?” Dai-chan smiled sheepishly. He really is a naïve person.
“Yeah you can. Then I’m going to the counter.”
“Yossha! Let’s get to work!”
**
Dai-chan knew quite well that I love to be in the counter, that’s why he chose to be the cashier.
After approx 30 minutes, The customer came from the back of the café and called for me.
“Ah anoo.. my pants already clean, thank you for your help!” He bowed to me again.
“Glad we can help you.” I answered him and smiled.
“ah.. thank you very much.” He bowed again.
“Hey, don’t be like that... if you keep bowing down to me, I’ll feel like an ojii-san.” I said to him, trying to ease his tension.
“AH yeah.. yeah… umm.. by the way.. can I come again, toworrow? To the café?” He asked slowly, seemed so unsure of what he said. Or maybe he was afraid.
“It’s okay, and please do become our regular, ‘kay.”
“Yokatta… I don’t know how many more lattes I’ll spill tho.” And then he finally chuckle.
“About that, please don’t” I chuckle back.
“Ja, I’ll go back to my table now.”
**
On the next day, he came like he promised before.
And the same like the day before, he ordered green tea latte. But fortunately, the latte wasn’t spilled and he can enjoyed the taste. ‘oishi’ he praised, and Dai-chan’s face turned bright since he was the one who made it. ‘Yabu can make a tastier one.’ Dai-chan said and his response was ‘hontou? This is already so good! I wonder how Yabu-san’s taste. Ne, tomorrow, make it for me ‘kay.’ He said with brimming eyes.
And so, now I have my hand full to make his green tea latte. He came again today, and he sit on the cashier. He didn’t order anything, he simply winking his eyes and I know already what he mean.
“Hai hai.” I answered him and proceeded his latte.
He watched how I made his latte thoroughly and ‘whoa’-ing now and then.
“It looked like a magic, Yabu-san…” He said.
“You’re praising too much.” I chuckle.
“Hey I’m serious haha.”
I worked on his latte and it is near its finish. Since he was a new friend of mine and specially request my latte, I gave him a bonus that I rarely gave to my customer. A latte art.
“Here you go.. your latte.” I handed him the latte form the back of the counter and I can saw it clearly. His face turned to awe.
“Th-this is… whoa! Kakkee!” He exclaimed. “Yabu-san you made this??? Whoa It’s my first time to have a latte art! And it’s a house!” He looked so cheerfull and it made me glad I made it for him.
“Yeah this is a house. And since you look like a nice person, I gave you this house. And you can think this café as a home, if you want.” I said, explaining why I gave him a house on his latte.
“Whoa! I thought you gave me a house because you know that I’m majoring in architect.. but the reason turned out to be more wonderful hahaha. Thank you Yabu-san. So now can I say ‘tadaima’ everytime I come here?”
“Then.. ‘o-ka-e-ri’, Inoo-chan. It shouldn’t be this formal if you speak to someone from the same house.”
“Hahahaha, okay no more -san to Yabu-san! And can I also call Arioka-san as Dai-chan?” He asked.
“Yeah you can Inoo-chan!” Dai-chan shouted from the cashier and we both laugh hearing it.
**
The ‘tadaima’ and ‘okaeri’ tradition started on the next day. He come on the same time like the day before and seems like it already become his habit to come on the same time to our café. From then he always come, almost everyday. And he always ordered green tea latte, and sometime when the day is not so cold, and he came on the afternoon, he ordered the iced one. But then he claimed that he doesn’t really like the iced latte one because he couldn’t have the latte art on it. And somehow it made Dai-chan pissed off and on the next day Dai-chan asked me to teach him how to make one. Dai-chan then showed his latte art to Inoo-chan and Inoo-chan praised Dai-chan happily.
Inoo-chan is not a stranger anymore to me and Dai-chan. We already become friends, bestfriends even and we are so proud of this friendship. We already know each other very well and we know what each other liked and disliked. Everything was so much fun.
And finally, for the first time, Inoo-chan came to the café in the evening.
“Tadai…..”
“Welcome!” Takaki said as Inoo-chan enter the café. But hearing ‘tadaima’, Takaki became surprised.
“Hey hey hey hey, are you Inoo-chan?” Hikaru suddenly already stood so close to him.
“AH… yeah…” Inoo answered.
“Oy Takaki! This is the Inoo-chan Yabu always talk about!” Hikaru shouted freely because the café wasn’t crowded.
“Oy!” I shouted from the counter.
“Hahaha, gotcha!” Hikaru winked to me. “Ne Inoo-chan, we already reserved your place, please come this way.” Hikaru lead and Inoo-chan followed. He already know that his table will be on the counter and comfortably put his bag on the counter once he arrived.
“Your place is here, Inoo-chan, in fro not Ya-bu-chan<3” Hikaru joked and went off before I could smack him down.
Inoo-chan watched Hikaru went off and blinked hard. He then face me with a frustrated face, like he was demanding some explanation.
“It’s your first time here, right Inoo-chan? That’s why you didn’t see Dai-chan here and see that clown over there.” I explained.
“Hey, I’m not a clown, Yabu-chan~” Hikaru suddenly appeared behind me and I was surprised.
“Oy! Hikaru!” I shouted, almost mad at him, but on the contrary Inoo-chan laughed.
“Hahahhaa.. yappari… this café is the best!” He laughed.
Inoo-chan laughed for a while, and I glad to see it. Somehow, when he first came in today, I couldn’t sense any happiness from him. Like he was so frustrated with something outside. But well, thanks to Hikaru he laughed like this. After that, I introduced Hikaru and Takaki to Inoo-chan, and it went well. They talked together like they already friends in their life although they just met today.
About what Hikaru said, the ‘Yabu always talk about’ part, well, it’s particularly true, but not true. It’s not just me who talks about Inoo-chan all the time, Dai-chan too. We were so excited to have a regular customer that became our friend. And to add more, Inoo-chan knows how to have fun.
This routine have been occurring for one months for now. Our friendship already deepened. We hang out together twice. One with Dai-chan, and one with Hikaru and Takaki, and of course I was present on those two moments. Dai-chan very clingy to Inoo-chan. He liked to be very close with Inoo-chan just like Inoo-chan is his big sister. And for Takaki, well, Inoo-chan really looked so different. He liked to bully Takaki and made fun of him. Takaki once mad at him, but never again after that time. With Hikaru, he liked to jokes together, well it’s a sight to see, since Hikaru is my childhood friend, my bestfriend, and all, and he was close with Inoo-chan, almost-to-be-my-everything.
As for me.. in this one month, we also get our friendship deepened, like the other. But.. I develop this kind of feeling with him. I don’t know this kind of feeling. I’ve never felt it this way before. I feel like I want to talk to Inoo-chan all the time. I feel like not wanting him to go out of the café, I want him to be always here. Sometimes I feel some frustrating feeling whenever I see Dai-chan being close to him. Sometime I envy Takaki for making Inoo-chan out of his character like usual, and I also envy Hikaru to be able to joke with Inoo-chan like that.
I always tell everything to Hikaru. And once I tell this to Hikaru.
“Whoa! That’s love, boy!” That was Hikaru’s only respond.
And in the next second, my face became so red like a tomato.
What? I am.. in love with Inoo-chan?
Although I don’t fully believe it, I came to a theory. Maybe that’s why I never felt this way before, because I’ve never in love before this. This feeling is so new, I don’t know what to think and do anymore.
After Hikaru said that, I came to observe myself.
Cling. The rings on the door ringing, indicating someone entering.
“Tadaima”
“Okaeri.”
And it’s already obvious who’s entering.
Inoo-chan immediately sit on the usual table, on the counter in front of me. And the moment Inoo-chan being one meter ahead of me, I felt some pang in my stomach. Yet, I was able to compose myself.
“So, what do you have today?” I asked him.
“Can I have a 4 leaf clover? Today’s my presentation.” He said.
And with that, I prepared his green tea latte with a 4leaf clover art on it. I tried to focus on my work and set Inoo-chan’s thing aside. But, with his stare at me, of course I couldn’t set him aside. He was eyeing me, very intense that I feel like he wants to become one with me.
Once I’m done, I gave him his latte.
“Here you go, Inoo-chan.” I put it on his table and our eyes met.
“Thank you.” He smiled.
And that smile really alluring. I felt like myself being drawn to him and I can feel my body start to bend forward, closer to Inoo-chan. Somehow.. I want to taste that pink lumpy lips of his.
I… I…..
“Yabu! I left my phone here last night!!” All of a sudden, Hikaru entered the café and rushly came to my side.
I jumped.
I was so surprised. At Hikaru for rushing in. And for me to think… to kiss Inoo-chan. I felt my face burning.
“Yabu? Oy Yabu!” Hikaru called, pinching my cheek.
“Uruse!!” I shouted and went back to the living room where we usually left our belonging when working in the café. Hikaru followed me.
“That was close Yabu!” Hikaru laughed.
Indeed, this person was preventing me from kissing Inoo-chan.
“Glad I accidentally left my phone here last night. Or else, you wouldn’t have a decent confession to him.” HIkaru laugh more.
“Urusai.” I said coldly.
“Just tell him first Yabu, the type like Inoo-chan, perhaps liked to be confessed before being kissed.”
“Hai hai wakatta..” I said uncaringly.
We already back to the café and to the counter, right in front of Inoo-chan.
“Already got your phone, Hikaru?” Inoo-chan asked.
“Yeah, although the battery is already ran out.” Hikaru answered him. Hikaru looked so absentminded like he was thinking something else. “Nee Inoo-chan, are you free tonight?”
“Hmm… I guess I am.”
“I’m going to throw a party here.” Hikaru said.
And the first one to respond was me.
“WHAT??” I said.
“Yeah Yabu, why don’t we throw a party for Inoo-chan? A welcome party for Inoo-chan.” Hikaru explained.
“And can you please add a ‘congratulation party’ too? Today’s my big project presentation and I feel like succeeding since Yabu gave me this clover!” Inoo-chan exclaimed as he showed his latte to HIkaru.
Gulp.
Am I.. one of the reason of him being confident like this? Am I that important to him?
Hikaru nudged me with his elbow.
“Of course, Inoo-chan!” He said to Inoo. “Then it’s already settled ne, Yabu??” He faced me and tapped both of my shoulder. But in the next second he looked away. “Dai-chan you HAVE to come! Takaki will come, too!” Hikaru shouted, and ready to storm out of the café, just like the way he entered.
But before Hikaru could escaped, I reach for him and caught him.
“Hey, Hika-!”
“Someone’s gonna thank me later.” Before even letting me finish my sentence, Hikaru cut it and immediately leave.
Maybe I will.
**
The party starts after the café closed. Me, Takaki and Hikaru of course already there. Dai-chan came to the café when the café was still open, but he went straight to the living room and decorate a bit. Dai-chan also already bought some beer and snacks on the way so we didn’t have much to do about the party. Hikaru only went out to buy more beer since he thought the beer was too few. And Dai-chan also forget to brought some games, therefore, Hikaru went to buy.
The party should have been started, but still haven’t. The man of the party still haven’t come and we respect him so much that we haven’t even touch a single can of beer.
After 30 minutes, the bell on the door ringing.
“Ahh!! Sorry for being late!” Inoo-chan said.
He was panting, like he was running to get here.
“Breathe, Inoo-chan, breathe.” Hikaru said and Inoo-chan took a very deep breath.
“I was.. the presentation was success.. hah.. hah… and we already move to hah.. the next stage.. that’s.. why I’m late.. hah hah..”
“Breathe! Inoo-chan! Breath… eh? What was that? CONGRATULATION INOO-CHAN!!!” Hikaru shouted. And then we start throwing candies to him. It’s just weird. Hikaru bought candies this much to throw at Inoo-chan instead of coloured paper. ‘Because you think of Inoo as a sweet candy that you want to lick’ Hikaru said when I ask before and he got a smack from me.
And with that, the party officially started.
The party was so loud. We laughed so much and shout too much. We did some karaoke, playing games and all. And not to forget we have beer, and MUCH beer, enough to make a big elephant got drunk.
Yeah, we drank until we get tipsy that out conversation turned to nonsense. But it was fun!
The party last until 3 AM and we fell asleep together on the living room.
Although the living room was full of cans and plastic from snacks, it was comfortable and we don’t want to move from there. All 5 of us lying on the carpet, Takaki slepet right beside a couch (and why he didn’t sleep on that couch, I wonder.) And Dai-chan sleep beside Takaki, using Takaki’s tight as a pillow. Hikaru slept on the center, mumbling unknown things. I don’t even know if that’s Japanese or aliens language.
And me… I know I have to thank Hikaru later. I sleep beside Inoo-chan. Our face were so close that I could see his face clearly. I drank much, but not as much as the other three to be heavily drunk. I still have my sense. I looked at Inoo-chan’s face and captured it in my heart before I close my eyes and drift to sleep.
I was on my way to the dreamland when I suddenly hear a whisper, a very faint one that it almost hard to hear.
“Yabu, I love you.” And I know quite well who that voice belongs to.
**
The morning came finally came, but we still haven’t got enough sleep. Me, Dai-chan and Inoo-chan wake up early, despite of the headache for the hangover, and prepare the café, while HIkaru and Takaki still fast-sleeping since they having night shift. Inoo-chan helped with cleaning the living room and then he will leave for work.
I remembered very well the whisper last night, although I was drunk and sleepy. And I knew it very well that it was Inoo-chan’s voice.
Before Inoo-chan went for work, I insisted to have him sip the green tea latte. I forced him to sit on his usual place and I made his latte in front of him.
Dai-chan was being considerate with me for preparing the ingredients we’ll be using out of the café, to gave us more privacy.
“So, what do we have today, Inoo-chan?”
“Umm… I don’t.. know… I’ll leave it to you then.”
And this is my chance.
I make everything I want him to see and I served it to him once it’s finished.
He was a bit surprised when he see it.
“Ya.. Yabu….?” He looked up and see through my eyes, questioning what’s the meaning of what carved on it.
“Will you go out with me?” I asked him confidentally.
I can see his face surprised with that wide eyes. He then looked to the latte and drink it, which I assume it’s a good sign. Well, of course I have confident and I know it’s a good sign. All this time I was confused of my own feeling around him. And once I know it’s love, he whispered that word to me in my sleep., like it was a secret to begin with.
“Please go out with me.” I continued. “I love you.”
Inoo-chan took another sip and then stood up. He slowly looked up, meet my eyes, and smiled.
“Don’t.” He said. And then he left.
Leaving me with confused feeling.
And leaving the unfinished green tea latte with a heart drawn on it.
**
After that confession, Inoo-chan never came again.
It was already 1 month that he never appear on the café. Everyone were so confused and frustrated, to know that Inoo-chan never came again. They didn’t know what happen with Inoo-chan that made him never come again. Dai-chan became very sad. Inoo-chan was already a good friend of his, he even tried to search for Inoo-chan but failed. Takaki, too, although he always being bullied bt Inoo-chan, he knew that Inoo-chan is just love to joke with him. Takaki also felt lonely when Inoo-chan isn’t around and wondering why Inoo-chan gone.
The only person who know about my confession is Hikaru. I told him everything. From Inoo-chan’s whisper, until my confession where Inoo-chan just said ‘don’t’ to me. I assumed that it was the reason why Inoo-chan don’t come anymore. Hikaru said that I was overthinking about it, that Inoo-chan must have another reason and not because of it. But I can’t think of another reason.
I saw Inoo-chan’s face back then. ‘Don’t’ he said with a smile. But somehow I know, that smile was forced. His eyes were emanating the loneliness when he said that.
‘Yabu I love you..’ his voice where not funny back then. No trace of tipsy in his voice or sleepiness. I know he was serious when he said that. But why?
He didn’t reject me. He just said ‘don’t’.. which means I shouldn’t love him? But why?
He loved me, he said that. But why I shouldn’t love him?
I always wait for him to come again.
And months already passed.
**
Another year come. It has been 2 months since Inoo gone from our café.
On the 2nd day of January, we were preparing to open the café when I saw a postcard on the postbox. It was very nostalgic, and familiar. The postcard were the photo of a latte art, a house. The first latte art I made for Inoo-chan.
I flipped it and see the writing.
‘Happy new year! Thanks for being home for me!’
Indeed, it was Inoo-chan. I didn’t know that he took a photo of that first latte art I gave him, but it made my hear hurt a little. On realization of how much I didn’t notice anything about Inoo-chan. On how my latte art had become something precious to him that he capture it.
There was no name on the postcard, but I know it’s Inoo-chan. But.. there’s an address on it.
“Dai-chan, I’ll leave for a while.” And I rushed to the mentioned address.
The 2nd of January is really cold, although I already wear my coat and sweater. Yet, I ran, and let the cold wind brush my face. I could feel my lips trembling and became dry because of the cold, but my feet dragged me to even run faster, just to see his smile sooner.
The address turned to be an apartment, and it was so luxurious. I went straight to his room and press the doorbell.
The door then opened and a woman, maybe in her 40s, came out.
“Yabu-kun right? Please get in.” She said.
I was surprised that she know my name.
“You must be wondering why I know your name, right? Kei talk much about you.”
Inoo-chan talked about me?
“Kei is inside this room, please do enter.” She said and let me go inside alone.
And there he is.. confined to the bed. With tubes and machine bound to him. He was lying weakly on the bed, and once I stepped inside, he heard me and slowly turned his head to me.
“Hello Yabu.” He greeted, with the same smile.
I gulped and walk to him.
I really don’t know what to think. He was gone for months and when I finally meet him again, he was so different. He was much cheerful back then. What happened to him?
“Surprised, Yabu? This is who I really am..” He said. I walked to him and finally reach him. I sit on the chair beside the bed. “I have this severe sickness… and never will be cured.” Inoo explained. “That’s why.. you shouldn’t love me.” His eyes turned to be very lonely when he said this.
Instead, I took his hand and holding it affectionately.
“Don’t I.. disgust you? Don’t you… pity me? Don’t you want to run out of this room right now seeing me like this?” He asked me, he looked so hurt while asking that thing. This surely his fears back then, why he didn’t accept my confession back then and instead running from it. He fears.. that I would be disgust of him and ran away from him once I know this condition.
“I still.. love you.”
“Don’t, Yabu, don’t.”
“How many time you tell me not to, but I still do. I still… love you… knowing your condition.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Inoo-chan shouted.
And I was so surprised that I almost fell back with my chair.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Yabu! It’s just because you pity me!!” He shouted more.
I was really shocked, hell yes. I really didn’t know what to think or feel. I feel like my heart was already so frozen since the time I see him like this, yet, I still don’t to back away. The longing I feel, the longing to be with him, the longing to touch him, to kiss him, to always be with him, still doesn’t fade away. I know I’m still in a state of shock knowing him like this, but… I still feel love in this state.
“But I still love you!! No matter what!! No matter you reject me hundreds times, no matter you left me and gone without explanation, no matter this sickness prevent us to meet, I still love you!!” I shouted back at him, and I didn’t realize that I already stand.
I took back my chair and sit again. He was looking at me with wide eyes and his eyes already so teary. I took both of his hands and hold it firmly.
“Instead of pity.. I feel like I want to always be with you.. to be your energy.. to be you green tea latte that always cheer you up…” I trailed.
I looked up and meet his eyes, staring deeply to them as I speak my words.
“Can I?”
He holds my hand back and started to tremble. He looked down and seems like he was in agony. And then I can hear his sob.
“One month…..” I could hear his faint voice in between his sob. “One more month…. The doctor said so.” He sobbed even more, he even having difficulties saying it. Pain and agony now could be heard very clearly in his voice. And it successfully made my already frozen heart crushed and shattered in pieces.
“O.. one month…..?” I trailed.
How many shocking news should I get today? Knowing Inoo-chan’s condition already become a shock, but I still can endure it. But.. knowing my tiny Inoo-chan’s left time… I just couldn’t bear it. I feel like bursting.
“O.. one mo…nth?” I said again, almost whispering.
I slowly stood up and tried to reach Inoo-chan who crouched down and crying. I want to reach it.
I can also feel my tears start pouring. It was too hurting.
But the one who hurt the most… is Inoo-chan.
That’s why.. although in this shocking and hurting condition, I have to be the one who’s strong.. at least a bit stronger than the fragile Inoo.
I slowly approached him and start bringing him into my chest, and I embraced him.
“I still love you… no matter what..” were able to come out my mouth in a hiss, although always cut with my sob and my tears.
And instead of backing away. He gladly accepting my warm embrace, just like later he accepted me in his life. I also come into his life.. shining like a blinding light.
**
After that moment in Inoo-chan’s house, I promised him that I’ll be coming there everyday in between my working time in the café. And he accepted it, he also said that he always wanted to see me so badly, but shouldn’t and couldn’t.
He also finally accepted my love for him, and he also said in whisper that he loved me. His face were so red when saying it. He was a shy type, and I could see it clearly. And with that, we sealed our love and promise with a kiss. It was our first kiss. And it was the kiss I’ve been wanting from the time he sip my latte that day.
The kiss was so sweet, just like I always imagine. His lips, although not as red as cherry like before and had already become paler because of his sickness, still tasted like a cherry, I could feel the hint.
We kissed for a while and we finally break away. The kiss was smooth, not the passionate type-like. Yet, I could feel his love emanating from it. His love was pure, child-like and innocent. I don’t need him to be passionate lover, feeling his pure love was enough.
And after that I stayed for a while. I mailed Dai-chan that I’ll be on the café late, and I also yell him that I met Inoo-chan. After that he showered me with question about Inoo-chan and almost rush here. But I tell him to stay on the café and promise him to explain later. I also tell him to have Hikaru and Takaki come early from the afternoon, because I want to explain about Inoo-chan’s condition to everyone.
I told everything to Inoo-chan. About how we become at loss when he was gone, and he was feeling sorry of it. He then asked Dai-chan and everyone to come to his place, and of course I’ll let them know about Inoo-chan’s request.
After that we talked about everything, more than before. It was finally the time Inoo-chan opened his heart freely, not bounded like the past. We spent time together and he still do he same like before, like he was being so sick. He was looking so strong, although his face couldn’t hide its pale. But still, he was as energetic as ever.
The promised time with Dai-chan, Takaki and Hikaru finally come and I have to get back to the café. I bid my goodbye to Inoo-chan, and of course, we kissed goodbye, and then I went out of his room. There, I met his mother again and she thanked me to still accepting his son in my life, she was crying to know that I love his son no matter what.
When I reached the café, everyont were already there. The café was open and fortunately we have few cutomers that time so we could sit on the café and discussed it together. They were so hyped about it, they were delighted to know that I already met Inoo-chan and can’t wait any further for me to tell them.
I told them everything. From the day I confessed to Inoo-chan, and what happened this morning, where I received Inoo-chan’s postcard with his address on it. I told them that I rushed there and finally met Inoo-chan. Their eyes were burning with joy when I tell that. But once I told him about Inoo-chan’s true condition.. no one opened their mouth. We fall silence and our cheerfulness vanished. They couldn’t believe that Inoo-chan was sick and… dying.. in one month. They don’t want to believe it, they thought of me as joking. Hell I could joke about the death of my lovely boyfriend. The tried to absorb the truth and tried to accept it. I told them that Inoo-chan wanted to meet them and they almost run to Inoo-chan’s place. But I prevent them.
They wanted to see Inoo-chan and.. want him to spend the rest of his time with happiness with them. I told them to come there, visit Inoo-chan everyday, but not to forget their everyday life, and then they acceoted it. Dai-chan’s shift time already ended, so he could go to Inoo-chan’s place. But Takaki and Hikaru couldn’t because his shift already start. They said they wanted to go there tomorrow morning, and so they go.
Everyone come one by one, and on the second day after I met Inoo-chan, the four of us went there and as expected. Inoo-chan’s room become so noisy but Inoo-chan was laughing all he wanted. The room was full of life, the same goes with Inoo-chan.
On the third day, Inoo-chan moved to the hospital so that the doctors could monitor him everytime. And so we move our base to Inoo-chan’s house to the hospital. It was so funny how we suddenly made Inoo-chan’s room into our base after we labeled the café as our home.
The day we spent was so much fun. Inoo-chan looked so healthy and not look like a sick person at all. But sometimes, when I was with him (I spend the most time with Inoo-chan, but the other doesn’t mind it at all. They said I should be the one who be there all the time and they was OK with me almost always neglecting the café.), sometimes The doctor came and check him up. I also once see him writhing in agony, and I immediately call the doctor. But later he become fine again, and I was glad.
We sometimes kiss, and cuddle. It felt weird, cuddling in the hospital’s ward. But it was fine, as long as I could hug my Inoo-chan. We did what we wanted to do, we feel what we want to feel. I pour all my attention and love for him, and so does him.
Everytime I felt sad because of the one month time, I immediately become cheerful again once I saw Inoo-chan’s smile. As long as he smile for me, I don’t need anything else.
And life have no mercy. The time passed quickly, and we already entered the second week.
**
On the second week, we can see Inoo-chan’s condition worsen. He looked weaker and paler, but he still showed us that he was as strong and as healthy as before.
But our eyes cannot lie, we saw the truth clearly.
On this second week, he asked the doctor his special request that he will ask only once in his life.
It hurts, really. How he asked the doctor and how he said that it is his once in a lifetime request.
It would be normal if someone said ‘once in a lifetime request’ because I know they will break it, and say ‘once in a lifetime request’ again later. But it’s different with Inoo-chan.. He meant it. It’s his once in a lifetime request.. since his time is flying away.
And so the doctor gave up and let Inoo-chan do his request, but with conditions.
His request was to go out of the hospital for one day. He wanted to go to several places, but the doctor told him to just go to 2 places with car and hospital equipments on the car in case of his condition dropped. Inoo-chan accept his condition and so on the Thursday on the second week me and Inoo-chan go on a date. The doctor told us to go with a nurse but Inoo-chan reject it. He wanted us to be alone and so the doctor lost to Inoo-chan again.
We went to the disctrict with old building built there. Inoo-chan used a wheelchair, so he wouldn’t become so tired that could trigger his body to drop, and I am the one who push it. We went around the district quite long, he really love it. He liked seeing building, and I can see his eyes full of awe.
‘I always want to go here’ he said. No wonder he chose to major architecture since he loves building so much. There were also modern building in this district, and Inoo-chan’s eyes brimming again, and he talked about many things. He talked about how he loved seeing building and really want to be able to design one. ‘I want to make a house for you too, Kou..’ He said and I almost burst.
Ko-Kou.. it was the first time he called me by my name, of course I became surprise and went red.
‘Then that house should be ours, Kei.’ I answered him and he giggled. He took my hand and we stopped for a while, and feeling the warmth from our linking hands for a while.
After we went to the district, we went to the café. The second place he really want to come is the café. ‘Home’ he said. At first I thought Kei wanted to come to his house but he shook his head cutely. ‘What I mean by home is the café, Kou~ You’re so insensitive’ he said, and seeing him cute like that really made me giggle.
I rolled his wheelchair to the café’s door and he was the one who push the door.
He was proudly said ‘tadaima!’ and the 3, Dai-chan, Takaki, and Hikaru answered him happily ‘Okaeri Inoo-chan!!’ even almost shouting.
Seeing that, I could see a tiny fragment of water started to gather in Kei’s eyes.
Kei sit on his usual place, on the counter. And I stand in front of him, preparing his drink. This time, we served him a hot green tea, since he was on a special diet and the doctor prevent him to drink anything unusual. At first Kei demanded me to make him a greentea latte but I refused, and after a long argument, he gave up. He is stubborn, very stubborn.
I told everyone that Kei’s coming to the café and so they gathered here. And we talked and laughed in the café like before, like nothing happened with Kei.
It was really a good time, and I can see Kei’s eyes sparkling, it was really what he wanted for, his home and friends in it.
**
Three days after the day in the cafe, his body dropped.
It was like he was anticipating it, like he knew his body will become worse that he force the doctor to accept his request before. Like he was preparing himself, absorbing with the warmth of the outside world before he become like this.
He looked so weak, and pale. Even much more than before. He was moved to the special room where we cannot enter it freely anymore. By that time, everyone told me just to forget the café and always be with Kei.
And yeah, I gladly accepted it. And they knew very well that I really wanted to be with Kei.
I always sit beside Kei and took his hand, and he would always look at me and smiled.
It was already the third week, and Kei’s condition become worse every passing day. Dai-chan, Hikaru and Takaki came almost everyday on the third week and tried to cheer Kei. Kei of course became happy of their visit. But become happy doesn’t mean become better condition. He always look so weak, even when he was smiling.
Sometimes his body suddenly flinching and he cried out of the pain. I immediately called the doctor and the doctor will check on him. I t was already become a routine. But although it is already become a routine, everytime it happened, I can’t prevent my heart from breaking.
I hurt me to see Kei like this. I hurt to see Kei become so weak. If it can be done, I want our position to swap. I want his sickness to become mine, let me be the one who’s sick, I don’t want to see him hurting this much.
My heart is breaking in each days, it even break more knowing the time we have decreased each seconds.
It hurt, painfully hurt. I really want to cry everytime I see Kei smile, but I shouldn’t. It’s hurting enough for him that I don’t need to add more pain to him.
Because of this breaking heart, I sometime hold her hands very strong that he could feel it. He would look at me in the eye and smiled, like he knew what’s on my mind, like he was telling me not to cry.
I really want to lung forward to him and hug him, crushing him with my embrace, but the tubes and the machine preventing it.
I really want to become one… with Kei.
**
Life is cruel. Time flies in a blink and it already the end of the third week.
Kei’s already become so weak. He could barely move, but he still able to speak.. and smile. Although his voice was so low and his smile could barely seen.
I watch him everyday, seeing his body worsen and feeling my heart breaking apart everytime.
On the last day of this third week, although he could barely move.. he forcefully tried to reach my hand and hold it strongly. Strongly for him, but for me, it felt like a faint touch, he was so weak.
Seeing his struggle, I smiled to him and brushing my lips to his forehead.
‘I love you’ I mouthed and he smiled.
He opened his mouth, he was trying to say something but his voice didn’t come out. He tried once again.
“Kou…. I want… your greentea latte.” He said slowly.
I shook my head.
“The doctor forbids you to consume outside food and drink Kei.” I refused him.
“But I… really… want to have it..” He said again, still so weak.
“Still no, Kei.. is having me here not enough for you? I could be you green tea latte to cheer you up.” I reasoned.
“Please…. let me have it Kou, I really really.. want it..” His looked me into my eyes, pleading so hard.
“It will be bad for your condition.” I reasoned.
“But… I’m.. dying… anyway… Lemme have.. everything I want.” He said and again, it breaks my heart to hear him saying it. It could be the first time the words come out of his mouth. He never being so negative. He always full of positive thinking that even he will… die eventually, he always face everything with bright eyes.
I looked away, trying not shed any tear.
“Don’t say that. It’s a bad omen.” I coldly said.
“But it’s the truth.. I have no more time.. lemme have it..” He coughed. “The latte with a heart on it…. That you made on the day you confessed… I haven’t finish it.. and I always regret that I didn’t drink it until the cup’s empty…. I always…. Regret it….”
He was having difficulty of talking, but he tried his hard to say those long words.
“I want… to drink it…. That latte… that love of yours… that you pours on a cup of latte…. Kou…. I want it…..”
I bit my lip, and gave up.
“Give me 40 minutes, and I’ll be back with it.” I said and rushed out of the hospital.
I ran all my might to the café and immediately make one once I arrived. Dai-chan was surprised to see me running to the café and make a green tea latte all of a sudden, but Dai-chan understands it, why I made one.
I finished making one and pour it to the thermos to keep it warm. I took a cup and ingredients to make a latte art and shoved it in my bag. And then I start to run again to the hospital.
Once I arrived, I prepared the drink inside Kei’s room. He watched me preparing for it with kind eyes, he smiled seeing me preparing his drink, preparing the drink where I pour all of my feeling in it. I’ve done the heart art on it and I gave it a finishing touch, and then I served it to Kei.
“Here is your green tea latte, sir.” I joked.
“Thank you.” He said and I switch the bed’s button until he was sitting on it instead of lying. He then move my hand and I handed him the latte carefully.
“You… even brought the café’s… cup.” He smiled wider. He looked at the art and smiled to himself, he stared for a while and seemed like he was reminiscing the day of the confession.
I saw it clearly, the longing, the loneliness, the love from his eyes when he stared the latte. He then bring the latte closer to his lips, and sip it. I watch him carefully and on standby mode to help him with this.
“It’s.. delicious….” He said. “It’s… sweet… and it tasted so deep…” He mumbled. “And the heart.. it’s so big.” He chuckled.
I ruffeld his hair and he smiled even more.
“I can feel…. Your love in this….. latte….. Kou……” He sipped it again until half of the cup, and then he started coughing.
I took the cup from his hand and put it on the desk. I tried to soothe his cough by stroking his back. But he kept on coughing.
I tried to reach for the doctor’s botton to call him, but somehow, his hand was strong enough to stop me.
“Do… don’t….” He managed to say.
He clenched his hand on his chest and tried to steady his breath and his cough. After a while the cough stopped and his hand lying weakly on his side. I switch his bed down again until he wasn’t sitting on it. It seemed painful to him.
“That day…… I came into the café…… I never thought…. That I’ll have a miracle… on it….” He said.
“Kei… you should rest….” I said to him but he slowly shook his head.
“It was… a miracle…. To me….. to have home… as warm as that…. To have friends.. as kind as… all of you….” Although speaking seemed painful to him, he still struggling to say it.
Kei… stop it…. Don’t say things like that..
“When I… enter the café…… and when…. You enter.. my life…. You came… like a blinding light…. My life… was so dark… before… right when I… know about my… sickness…..” He said. “I hate… my sickness… I hate… my body….. I hate… my life…. But with you in it…. I feel like.. it’s a worth living…..”
I ruffled his hair and watch him closely. Our eyes always linking.
“I love you… from the.. very first… and it hurts me…. To break your heart…. When you confess…. But I have to……………..” He cough again and I soothed him. “But you…. Come to me again… and still love me with this condition…….. it… made me really happy…. Kou….” The tears start to toll on his cheeks.
Somehow it breaks my heart.. I don’t know why he said thing like this.. I feel it like a bad omen.
He tried to look afar, to the desk. And watch the latte with a lonely eyes and shed tears even more.
“Seems like…. I wasn’t able… to finish it again………” He smiled apologetically. “The latte of your…. Love….” He tried to smile even wider, but his tears now streams down like a river.
And with this, I start to cry too.
Don’t say it like that, don’t say it like that. You’ll finish it!!
But my mouth was to dry to tell things.
And then he coughed again. And then he seemed to be in agony, having a hard time to breathe.
I could only stroke his hand smoothly, not being able to do anything.
“I guess.. this is… my…. Limit…” He trailed.
And I immediately stood up to reach the button to call the doctor, and again, he took my hand. I looked at him and he was trying so hard to shook his head, but his head only move a little.
I sit again, obeying him. I took his hand and hold it firmly and kiss it desperately.
He was in pain, it was so painful to him for even to breathe. It was like something was choking him but he endured it and face me, look me in the eyes.
“I love…….. y…..” but before being able to finish his sentence, he closed his eyes.
The machine make a sound of a very long beep like there’s never an end to it.
I watch Kei’s face, although his brows were furrowed, like he was in pain, he smiled. I could only see it and hold Kei’s hand.
My tears didn’t come out anymore. It has stopped. Just like my heart feel like stopping seeing this scene.
My mind was blank and I don’t know what to think. The only think I could do is to stare at Kei’s angelic face.
I took his hand and stood up. I bent down to him and kissed his forehead.
“I love you.” I murmured to him in his ‘sleep’. Just like how he whispered to me in my sleep back then, when we started everything.
**
I still remember it clearly, the day you walk into my life. You opened the door and enter along with the light.
And I still can feel it clearly.. the day you walk out of your life, you vanished in the light. But those light.. still shining in my heart. because in there, you’re still alive, and will never fade away.
Hey.. when we meet again in our next life.. promise me you’ll finish that latte, ne.
-owari-
Note: I FORGET ON HOW TO MAKE FIC YEAH haha. I love this story but it's written badly huhu I don't think I can write a good one.
It's a quite long oneshot, almost 9k words, but please do enjoy it ne... I'll be really really happy if you do :')
oh and I must warn you that this fic is mostly narrative instead of conversation.. I'm bad at narrative and I don't know why I write it this style huehehe :B
At first when I write this, I don't know how the story will go, but I was reminded of a certain video and story and.. thenI was inspired of it. The video was a KIA Picanto Ad, but it's soo good. You can see it here-> Coversation Over Coffee and the story is here-> His Promise Wouldn't be Denied And some part of it also inspired by Jostein Gaarder's The Orange Girl.
And then... I want to say
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO TASUKU_KYOTA!!!!!!!
Happy birthday hun!!
WIsh you a good live and wish all of your wishes to be granted!!
You know how bad I am at bday greetings so don't expect me to write a good one ne :')
And one more thing... I'm sorry it's already passed, but HAPPY BIRTHDAY VTANXM!!!
I'm sorry for greeting you late! I wasn't around here for a long time hahaha!!
Wish you all the best! And wish all of your wishes to be granted!! (It's the same with the above, bleh.. I'm sorry I'm bad at things like this. :p) anyway, happy basudei!!
Okay, that's all. Ciao<3