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[nil_nil_nil]

Mother's been sent home from hospital last thursday, with a light diet prescription and a rib-crunchingly tight corset to wear for a month or so, meant to prevent entrails from spilling out (as the doctor wittily put it). On a hindsight now, the whole thing may have looked worse than it actually was, mainly cause it took us all by surprise... like

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[lucylle]

That's mainly because the earlier generation lived in a time where they effortlessly passed from mother's care to living with a wife... they didn't have the chance to learn housework: the only men who knew how to cook and clean (apart from those in the business) were those who held those jobs in the army/prison. ;-)

Plus, women didn't have all those articles explaining exactly how to get a man to do household chores. :-P

[nil_nil_nil]

Couldn't have put it better :)

One real bad memory I have from when I was a kid is when my father and my mother worked in different cities - I lived with my mother and we only met on weekends. Each time we got to his place it looked like it had been the playground for a dozen baboons on a massive speed high. So my mother and I would spend the best part of the weekend cleaning up, we would leave on sunday night and next week it would start all over again.

You see, his cluelessness is no issue per se - as a matter of generations, I expect it. It's his persistant refusal to admit it that pisses me off. I mean, he's not able cook, no problem, I don't bother doing it - I just can't bear him circling around like a vulture for all the time it takes, grunting, criticising and acting like he knows better when it's only obvious he doesn't. Sometimes I just wonder how could my mother swallow this shit for thirty years without going mental.

[lucylle]

So my mother and I would spend the best part of the weekend cleaning up, we would leave on sunday night and next week it would start all over again.

I bet it certainly damped your enthusiasm for the weekends...

On the other hand, parents usually develop the rock hard belief that "they know better". While it certainly sounds reasonable during the first years of their children's life, once they hit adulthood matters usually turn around... example: whoever spent eons explaining how to send a fax/email/sms to a parent will agree with me on the fact that they just aren't fit to use modern day technology.
But they keep on seeing it as "you are kindly explaining a finer point on something I already know", rather than "yes, I was trying to send a fax through the printer"... it's inconceivable that someone they had to nurse and buttwhipe is now capable of performing tasks better than them. So you get the vultures.... ;-)

[nil_nil_nil]

Exactly. The know-better attitude has something to do with evolution and it's going to stay - it's all about keeping pups out of the reach of predators, either dinosaurs or paedophiles. Technology would deserve a whole chapter on its own in that it smashes the I-know-better paradigm at a much earlier stage than most parents expect or are comfortable with... I mean, most people over fourty I know are so naive a five-year old could lecture them silly. No wonder Luddites come so cheap nowadays ;)

Problem with my father is, aside from parent-child dynamics, he fucking knows EVERYTHING better than everyone else (or so he thinks). Art, politics, housekeeping, pitbull-breeding - you name it? He knows better. I've lost count on how many friendly talks I've seen degenerate into Stalingrad Act II. Now that can be challenging (if not fun) if you're talking about Dali's paintings, much less when you're trying to cook a proper amatriciana :P