"Irony", Baccano! NaNoWriMo response
I'm starting to get freaked out that I'm going to end up fall behind even though I'm still a day or so ahead. O-O *Starts writing like a maniac*
This one is for resphoina, who appears to have invented a whole new genre just for Ladd and Lua. Sadistic romantic comedy. Golden.
Character(s)/Pairing: Ladd/Lua
Genre: Sadistic romantic comedy. What.
Rating: R for Ladd!
Prompt: Marriage proposal. >D
Title: Irony
Pairing: Ladd/Lua
Genre: Sadistic romantic comedy
Rating: PG-13/R (depends on how sensitive you are to casual thoughts of murder and suicide)
Warnings: Ladd.
Wordcount: 1613
Total Progress: 37202/50000 = 74.40% complete
Ladd Russo had absolutely no desire to kill people that wanted to die. Killing those who felt completely safe was glorious and killing people who feared for their lives was entertaining, but killing the suicidal took all the fun out of murder. Suddenly, his favorite and most skillful hobby would become more of a chore, and just like a stubborn child, he would make every excuse imaginable to get out of it. Luckily, whenever his uncle ordered a hit on one such person, they would usually end up taking care of themselves before he even arrived, driven to suicide upon learning of their limited time, determined to end their existence on their own terms. Of those who patiently waited for him to come to them without any resistance, accepting their fate yet unwilling to do the deed themselves, however, Ladd would persuade them to leap to their deaths from their offices, threatening them with a much more unpleasant and painful passing if they failed to gather the courage. He was a great bluff--there wasn't a single one who didn't lie bloody and broken on the pavement below after such an encounter. His uncle would actually praise him for "making it look like a suicide" in those situations, saving him the money he would have otherwise used to bribe the authorities to look the other way upon discovering whatever horrible and twisted scene Ladd had left behind. It was a very rare occurrence for him to leave any survivors (unless he was ordered to let certain people live, but even then he didn't always obey), and they always demanded more to keep the truth hidden when women and children were counted among the victims, but being asked to aid in an assisted suicide always left him with a bad taste in his mouth and he would leave the mansion without actually harming a single soul. Sometimes it was so bad that took several days for him to recover his joy of killing.
Meeting Lua Klein, however, was completely different. Instead of being apathetic and bored with her lack of love of life, he became intensely interested in what had caused her to feel that way. At first, he rationalized his curiosity as the result of her being the very first woman he knew that wanted to die, but soon he began to understand that his affection was not based shallowly on her pretty face. One day after becoming particularly frustrated and lacking any worthwhile targets to unleashed himself upon, he found himself paying Lua a visit, having offered her a place in his home purely on a whim, and she had accepted the offer, likely expecting him to kill her quickly if she remained in close proximity. She'd looked up from the jigsaw puzzle she had been in the process of solving before his entry, but didn't say a word as Ladd began to rant. Halfway through his complaints, however, Ladd began to notice something that had never happened before without paying a visit to someone of his death list--his mood was beginning to improve. It didn't take him very long to realize that something about Lua's way was affecting him, pacifying him, and he never wanted it to escape him. He decided then and there that she would become his woman, and if Lua objected, she never let him know.
It was quite the dilemma, however, falling in love with a suicidal woman. Ladd had no actual interest in actually killing her, but figured that the only way to keep her from finding someone else to end her life or take it into her own hands was to promise her that he would get around to it eventually. After some consideration, he announced his newly discovered goal to kill everyone who wanted to live more than her in the world, saving her for last, which had the desired effect, judging by how her eyes shone in response. Over time, the declaration became something of a reoccurring pattern of flirting or sweet nothings as they discussed her preferred method; drowning, strangling, stabbing, shooting; but as people were born faster than he or anyone else in the world could dispose of them, her approaching day of destiny was pushed back with every minute. Ladd Russo never broke a promise, but in this case, he was sure to leave it open ended. He doubted anyone in the world wanted to die more than Lua, and if anyone did, they'd already taken care of it, so it would be perfectly reasonable to let her live a full life while she waited. As their conversations progressed, he asserted more and more that he would be the one to kill her in the end, and that it was a privilege no one else was allowed to take from him. He was eventually able to convince Lua to make that promise to him in return.
It was nothing short of ironic how a murderer like him was putting so much effort into persuading someone to stay alive, but Ladd couldn't stop himself from enjoying the time they spent together. Even though he had no interest in killing her, that didn't stop him from occasionally teasing and bullying her, scattering her jigsaw pieces and taking great delight in her sad and lonely expressions. Instead of deterring her, however, his sadism struck a chord in her masochistic heart, and she became more attached to him than ever before, and Ladd began to notice the smallest of changes in them both. He was still easily excitable but had become considerably more calm, and she was slowly beginning to smile more often as he pulled her back from the brink of death, becoming a little more willing to continue living by his side. He began to become unable to imagine life without her, and that was all Ladd needed to commit himself. It had only been a couple of weeks, but Ladd wasn't the type to waver in indecision. Like with all things, he made his decision and charged straight ahead, regardless of the obstacles, expecting nothing but the desired outcome.
He couldn't help but continue to tease her, though, creeping up behind her and pushing the gun barrel to her head. She was surprised, but turned around without fear, knowing it was him, but her eyes were wide with wonder. Despite his promises, he'd never actually made any move to fulfill them before today. "Are you ready to say goodbye to Miss Klein?" Ladd asked her, smirking devilishly, knowing full well that she would misunderstand his intentions. She didn't know enough about guns to realize that the one he held was obviously fake, but even if she did, she was too busy looking at him to examine the model in his hand.
"Ladd," she said, in her usual soft whisper of a voice, but didn't finish vocalizing whatever thought she had begun. Instead, she allowed her eyelids to slowly drift closed as her face slackened, preparing herself for the death she expected to soon follow. Ladd entertained the notion that she would have confessed her love to him if she had continued.
He face was so devoid of emotion that Ladd couldn't stand it. If that was going to be the face she was going to make for him once he finally got around to fulfilling his promise, then she could just forget it. There was nothing interesting about people passing on peacefully. If that was the type of death he enjoyed, he would have become a priest specializing in giving last rites rather than a mafia hitman. "Open your eyes, Lua," he said as he pulled the trigger, turning the gun barrel perpendicular so she could read the message rolling out of the prank pistol as a handful of glitter and ribbons floated to the floor.
However, Lua did not open her eyes and missed the entire display, completely caught up in her expectation to feel death's kiss sweep her up and away from the world of the living. Frustrated, Ladd watched her for a few moments before raising his free hand to lightly flick her nose, the slight pain causing her to react immediately as she was counting on a painless passing. She opened her eyes and covered her stinging nose with one hand, startled and confused.
"Marry me," Ladd demanded, now that he had her full attention, reading out the gun's message since it seemed she was much too dumbfounded to look it over herself. He said it like there was no way she would not accept his proposal, or that he would not allow her to reject him if she had any doubts. His frown quickly becoming a sadistic smirk, he added, "It's going to be too hard to kill everyone who wants to live more than you at this rate, so I'll give you something to want to live for. Just you wait--you'll become so happy with life that you'll become the person who wants to live the most in the world. When that day comes, just like today, the last thing you'll expect is to find me standing behind you with a gun to your head. I'll look forward to the wonderful expression you leave on your beautiful corpse."
"Ladd," Lua said again, in the same breathy tone, her eyes shining with that familiar light. If she had any objections, she didn't voice them, but Ladd wouldn't have entertained them, regardless.
He was still torn between whether or not he would actually live up to his promises, but this way, Ladd supposed, even if he really did kill Lua one day, at least she would be happy enough with her life for it to be worth it.
This one is for resphoina, who appears to have invented a whole new genre just for Ladd and Lua. Sadistic romantic comedy. Golden.
Character(s)/Pairing: Ladd/Lua
Genre: Sadistic romantic comedy. What.
Rating: R for Ladd!
Prompt: Marriage proposal. >D
Title: Irony
Pairing: Ladd/Lua
Genre: Sadistic romantic comedy
Rating: PG-13/R (depends on how sensitive you are to casual thoughts of murder and suicide)
Warnings: Ladd.
Wordcount: 1613
Total Progress: 37202/50000 = 74.40% complete
Ladd Russo had absolutely no desire to kill people that wanted to die. Killing those who felt completely safe was glorious and killing people who feared for their lives was entertaining, but killing the suicidal took all the fun out of murder. Suddenly, his favorite and most skillful hobby would become more of a chore, and just like a stubborn child, he would make every excuse imaginable to get out of it. Luckily, whenever his uncle ordered a hit on one such person, they would usually end up taking care of themselves before he even arrived, driven to suicide upon learning of their limited time, determined to end their existence on their own terms. Of those who patiently waited for him to come to them without any resistance, accepting their fate yet unwilling to do the deed themselves, however, Ladd would persuade them to leap to their deaths from their offices, threatening them with a much more unpleasant and painful passing if they failed to gather the courage. He was a great bluff--there wasn't a single one who didn't lie bloody and broken on the pavement below after such an encounter. His uncle would actually praise him for "making it look like a suicide" in those situations, saving him the money he would have otherwise used to bribe the authorities to look the other way upon discovering whatever horrible and twisted scene Ladd had left behind. It was a very rare occurrence for him to leave any survivors (unless he was ordered to let certain people live, but even then he didn't always obey), and they always demanded more to keep the truth hidden when women and children were counted among the victims, but being asked to aid in an assisted suicide always left him with a bad taste in his mouth and he would leave the mansion without actually harming a single soul. Sometimes it was so bad that took several days for him to recover his joy of killing.
Meeting Lua Klein, however, was completely different. Instead of being apathetic and bored with her lack of love of life, he became intensely interested in what had caused her to feel that way. At first, he rationalized his curiosity as the result of her being the very first woman he knew that wanted to die, but soon he began to understand that his affection was not based shallowly on her pretty face. One day after becoming particularly frustrated and lacking any worthwhile targets to unleashed himself upon, he found himself paying Lua a visit, having offered her a place in his home purely on a whim, and she had accepted the offer, likely expecting him to kill her quickly if she remained in close proximity. She'd looked up from the jigsaw puzzle she had been in the process of solving before his entry, but didn't say a word as Ladd began to rant. Halfway through his complaints, however, Ladd began to notice something that had never happened before without paying a visit to someone of his death list--his mood was beginning to improve. It didn't take him very long to realize that something about Lua's way was affecting him, pacifying him, and he never wanted it to escape him. He decided then and there that she would become his woman, and if Lua objected, she never let him know.
It was quite the dilemma, however, falling in love with a suicidal woman. Ladd had no actual interest in actually killing her, but figured that the only way to keep her from finding someone else to end her life or take it into her own hands was to promise her that he would get around to it eventually. After some consideration, he announced his newly discovered goal to kill everyone who wanted to live more than her in the world, saving her for last, which had the desired effect, judging by how her eyes shone in response. Over time, the declaration became something of a reoccurring pattern of flirting or sweet nothings as they discussed her preferred method; drowning, strangling, stabbing, shooting; but as people were born faster than he or anyone else in the world could dispose of them, her approaching day of destiny was pushed back with every minute. Ladd Russo never broke a promise, but in this case, he was sure to leave it open ended. He doubted anyone in the world wanted to die more than Lua, and if anyone did, they'd already taken care of it, so it would be perfectly reasonable to let her live a full life while she waited. As their conversations progressed, he asserted more and more that he would be the one to kill her in the end, and that it was a privilege no one else was allowed to take from him. He was eventually able to convince Lua to make that promise to him in return.
It was nothing short of ironic how a murderer like him was putting so much effort into persuading someone to stay alive, but Ladd couldn't stop himself from enjoying the time they spent together. Even though he had no interest in killing her, that didn't stop him from occasionally teasing and bullying her, scattering her jigsaw pieces and taking great delight in her sad and lonely expressions. Instead of deterring her, however, his sadism struck a chord in her masochistic heart, and she became more attached to him than ever before, and Ladd began to notice the smallest of changes in them both. He was still easily excitable but had become considerably more calm, and she was slowly beginning to smile more often as he pulled her back from the brink of death, becoming a little more willing to continue living by his side. He began to become unable to imagine life without her, and that was all Ladd needed to commit himself. It had only been a couple of weeks, but Ladd wasn't the type to waver in indecision. Like with all things, he made his decision and charged straight ahead, regardless of the obstacles, expecting nothing but the desired outcome.
He couldn't help but continue to tease her, though, creeping up behind her and pushing the gun barrel to her head. She was surprised, but turned around without fear, knowing it was him, but her eyes were wide with wonder. Despite his promises, he'd never actually made any move to fulfill them before today. "Are you ready to say goodbye to Miss Klein?" Ladd asked her, smirking devilishly, knowing full well that she would misunderstand his intentions. She didn't know enough about guns to realize that the one he held was obviously fake, but even if she did, she was too busy looking at him to examine the model in his hand.
"Ladd," she said, in her usual soft whisper of a voice, but didn't finish vocalizing whatever thought she had begun. Instead, she allowed her eyelids to slowly drift closed as her face slackened, preparing herself for the death she expected to soon follow. Ladd entertained the notion that she would have confessed her love to him if she had continued.
He face was so devoid of emotion that Ladd couldn't stand it. If that was going to be the face she was going to make for him once he finally got around to fulfilling his promise, then she could just forget it. There was nothing interesting about people passing on peacefully. If that was the type of death he enjoyed, he would have become a priest specializing in giving last rites rather than a mafia hitman. "Open your eyes, Lua," he said as he pulled the trigger, turning the gun barrel perpendicular so she could read the message rolling out of the prank pistol as a handful of glitter and ribbons floated to the floor.
However, Lua did not open her eyes and missed the entire display, completely caught up in her expectation to feel death's kiss sweep her up and away from the world of the living. Frustrated, Ladd watched her for a few moments before raising his free hand to lightly flick her nose, the slight pain causing her to react immediately as she was counting on a painless passing. She opened her eyes and covered her stinging nose with one hand, startled and confused.
"Marry me," Ladd demanded, now that he had her full attention, reading out the gun's message since it seemed she was much too dumbfounded to look it over herself. He said it like there was no way she would not accept his proposal, or that he would not allow her to reject him if she had any doubts. His frown quickly becoming a sadistic smirk, he added, "It's going to be too hard to kill everyone who wants to live more than you at this rate, so I'll give you something to want to live for. Just you wait--you'll become so happy with life that you'll become the person who wants to live the most in the world. When that day comes, just like today, the last thing you'll expect is to find me standing behind you with a gun to your head. I'll look forward to the wonderful expression you leave on your beautiful corpse."
"Ladd," Lua said again, in the same breathy tone, her eyes shining with that familiar light. If she had any objections, she didn't voice them, but Ladd wouldn't have entertained them, regardless.
He was still torn between whether or not he would actually live up to his promises, but this way, Ladd supposed, even if he really did kill Lua one day, at least she would be happy enough with her life for it to be worth it.