Let's Ride; Oh, Mother; Goodmorning, Sunshine
Another fanfiction dump! Has it really been two months? Sorry!
Just a bunch of one-shots this time.
Title: Let's Ride
Rating: PG
Length: ~1500 words
Genre: Friendship, Humor, Angst
Summary: Zack teaching Cloud how to ride a motorcycle, Cloud being sad (don't read past the hyphens if you don't want to get bummed out...)
A black-gloved hand jabbed at the air, quickly indicating the controls in respective order. “Shifter, clutch, front break, throttle, rear break. Got it?” The SOLDIER was all smiles as he glanced back to Cloud for response.
The youth straddling the motorcycle just leaned back, blond brows furrowed. “What?”
A melodramatic sigh escaped Zack’s lips and he leaned in, clapping a hand on Cloud’s shoulder. “Okay, I’ll go slow for you. ‘Cause you’re blond. Cluuuuutch, shiiiiifff-”
“Shut up!” Mouth screwed into a hybrid of a scowl and a smirk, Cloud shoved at Zack’s arm before leaning over again and grasping the handle bars. “This is the clutch, and the shifter. And...one of the breaks.” Cloud hesitantly jiggled the right lever.
“Front break,” Zack was quick to correct, before tapping at Cloud’s right foot with his left toes. “This is the rear break. And the throttle.”
“Okay. Clutch, shif-” Cloud gasped and gripped the handlebars until his knuckles whitened when Zack turned the ignition, and the engine suddenly roared to life. Obviously braced for something momentous, the blond grew bemused when the bike simply continued to idle.
Zack snickered, even in the face of Cloud’s “we are not amused” glower. “It’s not gonna bite you! It’s not going to do anything until you put it in gear.” He leaned in and indicated to the dimmed light, “See, it’s in neutral. Kick up the stand and shift gears.”
“But I haven’t even learned all the controls yet!” He was not letting up his vice grip on the handlebars.
The brunet easily waved aside Cloud’s concerns, “It’s like swimming. I could talk all day about paddling around, but you’re never going to learn anything until you jump in the water.”
Cloud remained unconvinced, lips pouted out into a frown as he stared ruefully down at the motorcycle beneath him. Resting a hand on Cloud’s opposite shoulder, Zack leaned up against him.
“Don’t worry! I won’t ever let anything bad happen to you, Cloud.” The soft sincerity in Zack’s voice brought a small smile to Cloud’s face, and eyes as blue as the afternoon sky above glanced up to meet the other’s mako-enhanced irises.
There was a small moment when neither boy said anything, their breathing put on hold, the rumbling engine just white noise in the distance-before Cloud rolled his eyes and scoffed, “My hero.”
Zack’s Cheshire grin returned, and he leaned away, “Yeah, well, I’d probably be demoted if I so carelessly sent a cadet to his death, so I’d have to cover it up and bury you in a ditch and say you deserted. And I don’t want to go through all that trouble.” The comment earned him a gentle elbow jab to the ribs, but Zack could see the simper on Cloud’s lips as the blond turned away.
Without another word, Cloud awkwardly hooked his heel around the kickstand and snapped it up.
Three hours later-after frightened cursing and screaming, locked brakes and skidding tires, stalling out and dropping the motorcycle over too many times to count, and even a couple of laughs-Cloud was cruising down the long stretch of road, blonde hair flapping in the breeze and slapping against Zack’s face.
The setting sun cast long, dark shadows against the rusting dirt of the canyon. Suddenly reminded of the time, Zack’s stomach growled hungrily. A sullen sigh left his lungs as he realized the day was coming to an end.
Leaning forward, the SOLDIER pressed his lips close to Cloud’s ear-only to make himself heard over the snarling engine and whipping wind, of course. “Hey, wanna think about heading back, now?” Cloud bright head bobbed in a nod, beginning to downshift through the gears.
As the bike started around the u-turn, Zack unconsciously gripped tighter around Cloud’s waist. His foot came off the peg, ready to reach out and stabilize any tipping. A little too tight in the curve, a little less power than the engine needed, and the bike threatened to pitch. Overcompensating, Cloud gunned the throttle; a little more than necessary, a little too quickly.
Dust erupted around the rear wheel, and the bike fishtailed wildly before jolting forward and finding traction again. Obviously startled, Cloud’s shoulders were hunched with tension until Zack reached his hands up and clapped them with a teasing, “Yay, we didn’t die!” Zack caught Cloud’s nervous grin in the mirror.
Halfway home, Cloud choked on a bug. They almost crashed, and Zack only laughed to tears. His contagious case of the giggles lasted long after Cloud had recovered from his unappetizing appetizer and continued. The Midgar skyline drawing closer, Zack rest his temple against Cloud’s shoulder, watching their shadows grow longer and longer until they disappeared into the twilight.
-----------
Wind whipping around him, Cloud sped down the dusty highway. Goggles glimmered in the sunlight, but his iridescent eyes stared into nothing as he continued on towards the skeleton of the once-was Midgar metropolis.
Pain suddenly shot through his diseased left arm, wrenching it into a spasm. Rubber burned as the bike screamed to a halt. Cloud hugged his throbbing arm close to his body, hissing through his gritted teeth. The burning ache eventually ebbed away. The attacks were becoming increasing frequent.
Reaching forward to grasp at the handlebars again, a sudden sense of déjà vu overwhelmed him. Cloud quickly grasped the root of the feeling as a new recognition about the road struck him. Suddenly a different kind of pain squeezed at his heart, traveling up and tightening his throat, stinging against the backs of his eyes.
Almost feebly, his better arm reached up to turn the key and cut off the engine. Now only the softly howling wind echoed through the canyon, tousling his hair. It was startling how little the landscape had changed in-seven years? Five of those had been stolen from him. From both of them.
What he wouldn’t give to go back seven years to that day. To any day. Just one more day with...
His eyes scanned the hills before resting grimly on the fateful bluff. In his mind’s eye, he could make out the silhouette of the Buster sword, even if his own enhanced sight couldn’t. It was tragically ironic how near the two polar memories physically rested.
Casting his gaze back down to his bike, the blond looked into his reflection in the black chrome fuel tank. He could still remember the motorcycle he’d learned on; the junky old Shinra model doomed to scrap before Zack pulled the right strings to get it.
Cloud’s lips twitched into a bare semblance of a smile. He remembered how excited Zack had been on that day. Trying to buff out all the scratches and dings, giddy as he promised to teach Cloud how to ride it ‘one day,’ if the cadet promised not to wreck it.
“It’s already a wreck,” he remembered remarking, and Zack feigned insult before rubbing the piece of junk tenderly and whispering sweet nothings into its headlight.
If Zack had loved that bike so much, he could only imagine the reaction his custom-made Fenrir would have garnered. The SOLDIER probably would have peed his pants. The mental image conjured a soft chuckle that sounded more like a sob.
Misty eyes glanced back to the other man’s final resting place for a moment, swallowing against the tightness in his throat before croaking out, “I’ll come visit you soon.” His eyelids closed in a painful grimace as his heart ached again. The world wouldn’t be so cruel and lonely if Zack were with him. If only.
Turning his head as the tears in his eyes threatened to spill over, ducking down as if embarrassed. “I’m sorry.” He could never apologize enough. He could utter the words every second of every day for the rest of his life and never say it enough. Cloud yanked his goggles down around his neck, a shaking gloved hand smothering his eyes.
His cell phone beeped and buzzed against his thigh, and Cloud didn’t answer. Taking in a shivering breath, Cloud straightened and shifted to reach into his pocket, pulling out the phone after a second set of beeps indicated a new voice mail.
“Hey, Reno called. He’s got a job for you in Healin.” Reno-probably the rest of the Turks, too. He didn’t even want to guess at their goings-on since the fall of the Company. “Cloud. How are you doing?” He snapped the phone shut with a soft sigh, reaching to replace the goggles to his face.
He never looked back up at the hill side. If he had, he might have seen the lone wolf forlornly sniffing at the Buster sword, pacing and whining. Feeling Cloud’s pain.
-----
author's notes: No! No one can convince me that the wolf is anyone or anything but Zack. All the “puppy” references in CC? Hanging around Zack's grave? Following Cloud around? Being in Cloud’s really flashy flashbacks of Zack as he suffers from the Geostigma near his grave? No! NO. It is not a metaphor, because metaphors don’t work like that. Unless Cloud is exuding wolf pheromones, that wolf (or several wolves) is not following Cloud around just to represent his loneliness. Lalalala, I can’t hear you.
Title: Oh, Mother
Rating: PG
Length: ~650 words
Genre: Humor?
Summary: Cloud visiting his mother on the infamous trip to Nibelheim.
“My, how you've grown.” Cloud was sure mothers were obligated to say such things. Grandparents, too. How long had it been, less than a year? He really hadn’t grown a whole lot, much to his own chagrin. His mother smiled at his embarrassed pout as she dutifully preened his unruly hair.
“Mom!” Mouth screwed in a scowl, he ducked his head and batted her hands away when she licked her own hand and tried to paste down one of his tufts of hair. Taking the hint, she left his blond head alone.
She just smiled down at her son, looking so tough and handsome in his little uniform. Cloud may have been upset for not being one rank or the other, but she was proud of him nonetheless. He'd left the nest a little too early for her liking, but he was making something of himself-no matter how sick with worry it made her.
“I bet the girls never leave you alone.” She began straightening out his collar and smoothing out his right sleeve. The poor boy’s clothes had probably not been ironed since he left. She vowed to press his things before he went off again.
Cloud sighed heavily. He hated when his mom brought this subject up, even in her letters. “Not really.” His arms flailed loosely in an attempt to regain his personal space.
His mother just rolled her eyes and sighed. What she wouldn’t give for the Cloud of ten years ago, who would let her baby and coddle him to no end. Unsure of what to do with herself, she paced and returned to stirring the pot of stew simmering on the stove. Cloud poured himself a glass of iced tea and sat down at the table.
After a few moments of silence, she looked back, “I'm worried about you.” Now Cloud rolled his eyes. His mother tapped the wooden spoon against the side of the pot before turning and gesturing with utensil, “There are a lot of temptations in the city. I'd feel a lot better if you just settled down and had a nice girlfriend.”
The “G” word again. Cloud looked down into his drink. There was one temptation in the city, but he’d sooner die before telling his mother about the stunning young SOLDIER with a silly grin he’d always fancied from afar. He didn’t doubt that his mother would accept him unconditionally, but she would tell her friend, and that friend would tell another friend. Word spread fast in Nibelheim, and Cloud didn’t want his personal life making town news.
Most importantly, with said SOLDIER currently stationed in that very town at that very moment, no doubt his mother would try to “set them up” with disastrous results. ‘Oh, you must be Cloud’s best friend Zack! You should come over for dinner. Oh, Zack, Cloud, will two you rush upstairs and stay there until dinner is ready? I want it to be a surprise. Don’t worry about making noise, I’ll be banging pots and pans down here. Oh, you are so charming, Zack! Won’t you marry my son and adopt some little babies and make me a happy grandma?’
“...I'm all right.” He took a sip of his drink, hoping beyond hope that she would drop the subject.
No such luck. “You should have an older girlfriend, one that'll take care of you. I think that would be the perfect type for you.” She nodded to accentuate her point, turning to stir again.
“I'm not interested.” Drop it, Mom. Just drop it. Just take the hint, and drop it.
His passive-aggressive protests fell on deaf ears. “But bring her home, first. I have to meet her. I don’t want you running off with some hussy to elope!”
Cloud wordlessly folded his arms across the table and dropped his head into them.
-----
more author's notes: All of the dialogue is from Final Fantasy 7. I claim no ownership to the dialogue (the rest of the prose is mine), and I’m getting no profit from this. But yeah, when Cloud had this discussion with his mom in the flashbacks (“Get a girlfriend!” “Not interested.”) I was, like, “Oh, he’s gay.” And when it got to the Zack flashbacks, and Zack undressed Cloud’s unconscious body and told him he “looked good” in the SOLDIER uniform, I realized, “Oh, so that’s his gay lover.” And the rest is history.
Anyway, I bet Zack’s mom is the same way. “Cloud, no. We do not tell my mom that her only son has a gay lover. She has been asking me for grandchildren since I turned thirteen. We cannot take that dream away from her, or she will have a nervous breakdown. But don’t worry, I got this all planned out. I marry Aeris and have a bunch of kids with her. Then she fakes her death, so I’m the troubled widower single-dad, and then you catch me on the rebound! No? No? Okay...”
Title: Good Morning, Sunshine
Rating: PG--13? Talk of naked butt.
Length: ~360 words
Genre: Humor
Summary: Zack wakes up with a surprise after getting drunk.
As consciousness returned, Zack groaned into his pillow. Reaching down to grab a sheet and pull it over his head, he found the effort fruitless; he was lying on top of top of them. The SOLDIER turned over with a disgruntled sigh, pushing himself up onto one arm and blearily opening his eyes.
Then he flopped back down onto the pillow, burrowing his face back into the mushy cushion. Several more minutes passed before Zack developed the will power to roll back up and turn his legs out over the side of the bed. Head in his hands, he heaved out another sigh and rubbed his face vigorously before slapping at his cheeks.
His head throbbed and his mouth tasted like day old vomit. He wouldn’t be surprised if it really was day-old vomit. He’d offered to take Kunsel out on the town to celebrate the 2nd Class SOLDIER’s birthday, and things got a little fuzzy after that.
He heaved himself up off the bed, beginning his usual morning squats to wake up and-
Ow.
After a night of drunken revelry, it’s not a good sign to wake up with a sore ass.
Zack reached back, rubbing at his tender cheek. He quickly unfastened his belts and pulled his pants down. Twisting, he noticed a gauze patch taped to his left butt cheek. Had he fallen down an injured himself? The SOLDIER peeled the patch off and rubbed, but felt no gash or stitching. But there was a grey mark he couldn’t quite make out-a bruise?
Nearly tripping over a pile of boots and armor haphazardly strewn across the floor, he made his way to the bathroom, trying to see what injury had befallen him. He had to place one foot on the toilet and the other on the sink to get a good look in the medicine cabinet’s mirror. And he was dumbfounded.
“What? What?” Leaning in closer, his footing slipped and he tumbled to the ground with a curse. Getting up on his knees, he twisted again to be sure of what he’d seen.
A tattoo. Of a little fluffy cloud. In the shape of a heart. On his ass.
Well, hope you enjoyed them!
Does anyone know where I can download files of the cutscenes from Crisis Core and/or Advent Children? (Or, does anyone know how to rip video files from a DVD?) I really want to try my hand at AMVs, but have no idea where to find the videos. (Shhh, we never had this discussion of illicit deeds.)
Thanks!
Just a bunch of one-shots this time.
Title: Let's Ride
Rating: PG
Length: ~1500 words
Genre: Friendship, Humor, Angst
Summary: Zack teaching Cloud how to ride a motorcycle, Cloud being sad (don't read past the hyphens if you don't want to get bummed out...)
A black-gloved hand jabbed at the air, quickly indicating the controls in respective order. “Shifter, clutch, front break, throttle, rear break. Got it?” The SOLDIER was all smiles as he glanced back to Cloud for response.
The youth straddling the motorcycle just leaned back, blond brows furrowed. “What?”
A melodramatic sigh escaped Zack’s lips and he leaned in, clapping a hand on Cloud’s shoulder. “Okay, I’ll go slow for you. ‘Cause you’re blond. Cluuuuutch, shiiiiifff-”
“Shut up!” Mouth screwed into a hybrid of a scowl and a smirk, Cloud shoved at Zack’s arm before leaning over again and grasping the handle bars. “This is the clutch, and the shifter. And...one of the breaks.” Cloud hesitantly jiggled the right lever.
“Front break,” Zack was quick to correct, before tapping at Cloud’s right foot with his left toes. “This is the rear break. And the throttle.”
“Okay. Clutch, shif-” Cloud gasped and gripped the handlebars until his knuckles whitened when Zack turned the ignition, and the engine suddenly roared to life. Obviously braced for something momentous, the blond grew bemused when the bike simply continued to idle.
Zack snickered, even in the face of Cloud’s “we are not amused” glower. “It’s not gonna bite you! It’s not going to do anything until you put it in gear.” He leaned in and indicated to the dimmed light, “See, it’s in neutral. Kick up the stand and shift gears.”
“But I haven’t even learned all the controls yet!” He was not letting up his vice grip on the handlebars.
The brunet easily waved aside Cloud’s concerns, “It’s like swimming. I could talk all day about paddling around, but you’re never going to learn anything until you jump in the water.”
Cloud remained unconvinced, lips pouted out into a frown as he stared ruefully down at the motorcycle beneath him. Resting a hand on Cloud’s opposite shoulder, Zack leaned up against him.
“Don’t worry! I won’t ever let anything bad happen to you, Cloud.” The soft sincerity in Zack’s voice brought a small smile to Cloud’s face, and eyes as blue as the afternoon sky above glanced up to meet the other’s mako-enhanced irises.
There was a small moment when neither boy said anything, their breathing put on hold, the rumbling engine just white noise in the distance-before Cloud rolled his eyes and scoffed, “My hero.”
Zack’s Cheshire grin returned, and he leaned away, “Yeah, well, I’d probably be demoted if I so carelessly sent a cadet to his death, so I’d have to cover it up and bury you in a ditch and say you deserted. And I don’t want to go through all that trouble.” The comment earned him a gentle elbow jab to the ribs, but Zack could see the simper on Cloud’s lips as the blond turned away.
Without another word, Cloud awkwardly hooked his heel around the kickstand and snapped it up.
Three hours later-after frightened cursing and screaming, locked brakes and skidding tires, stalling out and dropping the motorcycle over too many times to count, and even a couple of laughs-Cloud was cruising down the long stretch of road, blonde hair flapping in the breeze and slapping against Zack’s face.
The setting sun cast long, dark shadows against the rusting dirt of the canyon. Suddenly reminded of the time, Zack’s stomach growled hungrily. A sullen sigh left his lungs as he realized the day was coming to an end.
Leaning forward, the SOLDIER pressed his lips close to Cloud’s ear-only to make himself heard over the snarling engine and whipping wind, of course. “Hey, wanna think about heading back, now?” Cloud bright head bobbed in a nod, beginning to downshift through the gears.
As the bike started around the u-turn, Zack unconsciously gripped tighter around Cloud’s waist. His foot came off the peg, ready to reach out and stabilize any tipping. A little too tight in the curve, a little less power than the engine needed, and the bike threatened to pitch. Overcompensating, Cloud gunned the throttle; a little more than necessary, a little too quickly.
Dust erupted around the rear wheel, and the bike fishtailed wildly before jolting forward and finding traction again. Obviously startled, Cloud’s shoulders were hunched with tension until Zack reached his hands up and clapped them with a teasing, “Yay, we didn’t die!” Zack caught Cloud’s nervous grin in the mirror.
Halfway home, Cloud choked on a bug. They almost crashed, and Zack only laughed to tears. His contagious case of the giggles lasted long after Cloud had recovered from his unappetizing appetizer and continued. The Midgar skyline drawing closer, Zack rest his temple against Cloud’s shoulder, watching their shadows grow longer and longer until they disappeared into the twilight.
-----------
Wind whipping around him, Cloud sped down the dusty highway. Goggles glimmered in the sunlight, but his iridescent eyes stared into nothing as he continued on towards the skeleton of the once-was Midgar metropolis.
Pain suddenly shot through his diseased left arm, wrenching it into a spasm. Rubber burned as the bike screamed to a halt. Cloud hugged his throbbing arm close to his body, hissing through his gritted teeth. The burning ache eventually ebbed away. The attacks were becoming increasing frequent.
Reaching forward to grasp at the handlebars again, a sudden sense of déjà vu overwhelmed him. Cloud quickly grasped the root of the feeling as a new recognition about the road struck him. Suddenly a different kind of pain squeezed at his heart, traveling up and tightening his throat, stinging against the backs of his eyes.
Almost feebly, his better arm reached up to turn the key and cut off the engine. Now only the softly howling wind echoed through the canyon, tousling his hair. It was startling how little the landscape had changed in-seven years? Five of those had been stolen from him. From both of them.
What he wouldn’t give to go back seven years to that day. To any day. Just one more day with...
His eyes scanned the hills before resting grimly on the fateful bluff. In his mind’s eye, he could make out the silhouette of the Buster sword, even if his own enhanced sight couldn’t. It was tragically ironic how near the two polar memories physically rested.
Casting his gaze back down to his bike, the blond looked into his reflection in the black chrome fuel tank. He could still remember the motorcycle he’d learned on; the junky old Shinra model doomed to scrap before Zack pulled the right strings to get it.
Cloud’s lips twitched into a bare semblance of a smile. He remembered how excited Zack had been on that day. Trying to buff out all the scratches and dings, giddy as he promised to teach Cloud how to ride it ‘one day,’ if the cadet promised not to wreck it.
“It’s already a wreck,” he remembered remarking, and Zack feigned insult before rubbing the piece of junk tenderly and whispering sweet nothings into its headlight.
If Zack had loved that bike so much, he could only imagine the reaction his custom-made Fenrir would have garnered. The SOLDIER probably would have peed his pants. The mental image conjured a soft chuckle that sounded more like a sob.
Misty eyes glanced back to the other man’s final resting place for a moment, swallowing against the tightness in his throat before croaking out, “I’ll come visit you soon.” His eyelids closed in a painful grimace as his heart ached again. The world wouldn’t be so cruel and lonely if Zack were with him. If only.
Turning his head as the tears in his eyes threatened to spill over, ducking down as if embarrassed. “I’m sorry.” He could never apologize enough. He could utter the words every second of every day for the rest of his life and never say it enough. Cloud yanked his goggles down around his neck, a shaking gloved hand smothering his eyes.
His cell phone beeped and buzzed against his thigh, and Cloud didn’t answer. Taking in a shivering breath, Cloud straightened and shifted to reach into his pocket, pulling out the phone after a second set of beeps indicated a new voice mail.
“Hey, Reno called. He’s got a job for you in Healin.” Reno-probably the rest of the Turks, too. He didn’t even want to guess at their goings-on since the fall of the Company. “Cloud. How are you doing?” He snapped the phone shut with a soft sigh, reaching to replace the goggles to his face.
He never looked back up at the hill side. If he had, he might have seen the lone wolf forlornly sniffing at the Buster sword, pacing and whining. Feeling Cloud’s pain.
-----
author's notes: No! No one can convince me that the wolf is anyone or anything but Zack. All the “puppy” references in CC? Hanging around Zack's grave? Following Cloud around? Being in Cloud’s really flashy flashbacks of Zack as he suffers from the Geostigma near his grave? No! NO. It is not a metaphor, because metaphors don’t work like that. Unless Cloud is exuding wolf pheromones, that wolf (or several wolves) is not following Cloud around just to represent his loneliness. Lalalala, I can’t hear you.
Title: Oh, Mother
Rating: PG
Length: ~650 words
Genre: Humor?
Summary: Cloud visiting his mother on the infamous trip to Nibelheim.
“My, how you've grown.” Cloud was sure mothers were obligated to say such things. Grandparents, too. How long had it been, less than a year? He really hadn’t grown a whole lot, much to his own chagrin. His mother smiled at his embarrassed pout as she dutifully preened his unruly hair.
“Mom!” Mouth screwed in a scowl, he ducked his head and batted her hands away when she licked her own hand and tried to paste down one of his tufts of hair. Taking the hint, she left his blond head alone.
She just smiled down at her son, looking so tough and handsome in his little uniform. Cloud may have been upset for not being one rank or the other, but she was proud of him nonetheless. He'd left the nest a little too early for her liking, but he was making something of himself-no matter how sick with worry it made her.
“I bet the girls never leave you alone.” She began straightening out his collar and smoothing out his right sleeve. The poor boy’s clothes had probably not been ironed since he left. She vowed to press his things before he went off again.
Cloud sighed heavily. He hated when his mom brought this subject up, even in her letters. “Not really.” His arms flailed loosely in an attempt to regain his personal space.
His mother just rolled her eyes and sighed. What she wouldn’t give for the Cloud of ten years ago, who would let her baby and coddle him to no end. Unsure of what to do with herself, she paced and returned to stirring the pot of stew simmering on the stove. Cloud poured himself a glass of iced tea and sat down at the table.
After a few moments of silence, she looked back, “I'm worried about you.” Now Cloud rolled his eyes. His mother tapped the wooden spoon against the side of the pot before turning and gesturing with utensil, “There are a lot of temptations in the city. I'd feel a lot better if you just settled down and had a nice girlfriend.”
The “G” word again. Cloud looked down into his drink. There was one temptation in the city, but he’d sooner die before telling his mother about the stunning young SOLDIER with a silly grin he’d always fancied from afar. He didn’t doubt that his mother would accept him unconditionally, but she would tell her friend, and that friend would tell another friend. Word spread fast in Nibelheim, and Cloud didn’t want his personal life making town news.
Most importantly, with said SOLDIER currently stationed in that very town at that very moment, no doubt his mother would try to “set them up” with disastrous results. ‘Oh, you must be Cloud’s best friend Zack! You should come over for dinner. Oh, Zack, Cloud, will two you rush upstairs and stay there until dinner is ready? I want it to be a surprise. Don’t worry about making noise, I’ll be banging pots and pans down here. Oh, you are so charming, Zack! Won’t you marry my son and adopt some little babies and make me a happy grandma?’
“...I'm all right.” He took a sip of his drink, hoping beyond hope that she would drop the subject.
No such luck. “You should have an older girlfriend, one that'll take care of you. I think that would be the perfect type for you.” She nodded to accentuate her point, turning to stir again.
“I'm not interested.” Drop it, Mom. Just drop it. Just take the hint, and drop it.
His passive-aggressive protests fell on deaf ears. “But bring her home, first. I have to meet her. I don’t want you running off with some hussy to elope!”
Cloud wordlessly folded his arms across the table and dropped his head into them.
-----
more author's notes: All of the dialogue is from Final Fantasy 7. I claim no ownership to the dialogue (the rest of the prose is mine), and I’m getting no profit from this. But yeah, when Cloud had this discussion with his mom in the flashbacks (“Get a girlfriend!” “Not interested.”) I was, like, “Oh, he’s gay.” And when it got to the Zack flashbacks, and Zack undressed Cloud’s unconscious body and told him he “looked good” in the SOLDIER uniform, I realized, “Oh, so that’s his gay lover.” And the rest is history.
Anyway, I bet Zack’s mom is the same way. “Cloud, no. We do not tell my mom that her only son has a gay lover. She has been asking me for grandchildren since I turned thirteen. We cannot take that dream away from her, or she will have a nervous breakdown. But don’t worry, I got this all planned out. I marry Aeris and have a bunch of kids with her. Then she fakes her death, so I’m the troubled widower single-dad, and then you catch me on the rebound! No? No? Okay...”
Title: Good Morning, Sunshine
Rating: PG--13? Talk of naked butt.
Length: ~360 words
Genre: Humor
Summary: Zack wakes up with a surprise after getting drunk.
As consciousness returned, Zack groaned into his pillow. Reaching down to grab a sheet and pull it over his head, he found the effort fruitless; he was lying on top of top of them. The SOLDIER turned over with a disgruntled sigh, pushing himself up onto one arm and blearily opening his eyes.
Then he flopped back down onto the pillow, burrowing his face back into the mushy cushion. Several more minutes passed before Zack developed the will power to roll back up and turn his legs out over the side of the bed. Head in his hands, he heaved out another sigh and rubbed his face vigorously before slapping at his cheeks.
His head throbbed and his mouth tasted like day old vomit. He wouldn’t be surprised if it really was day-old vomit. He’d offered to take Kunsel out on the town to celebrate the 2nd Class SOLDIER’s birthday, and things got a little fuzzy after that.
He heaved himself up off the bed, beginning his usual morning squats to wake up and-
Ow.
After a night of drunken revelry, it’s not a good sign to wake up with a sore ass.
Zack reached back, rubbing at his tender cheek. He quickly unfastened his belts and pulled his pants down. Twisting, he noticed a gauze patch taped to his left butt cheek. Had he fallen down an injured himself? The SOLDIER peeled the patch off and rubbed, but felt no gash or stitching. But there was a grey mark he couldn’t quite make out-a bruise?
Nearly tripping over a pile of boots and armor haphazardly strewn across the floor, he made his way to the bathroom, trying to see what injury had befallen him. He had to place one foot on the toilet and the other on the sink to get a good look in the medicine cabinet’s mirror. And he was dumbfounded.
“What? What?” Leaning in closer, his footing slipped and he tumbled to the ground with a curse. Getting up on his knees, he twisted again to be sure of what he’d seen.
A tattoo. Of a little fluffy cloud. In the shape of a heart. On his ass.
Well, hope you enjoyed them!
Does anyone know where I can download files of the cutscenes from Crisis Core and/or Advent Children? (Or, does anyone know how to rip video files from a DVD?) I really want to try my hand at AMVs, but have no idea where to find the videos. (Shhh, we never had this discussion of illicit deeds.)
Thanks!