A Humble Destiny
Felt like posting some old work. For posterity's sake.
For the future my plans are very simple. My goals are understandable, reasonable, and perfectly sane. Indeed, I would be very surprised should anyone here demonstrate shock or disapproval at these perfectly rational, straightforward, and premeditated plans for the future. For what have I done to be undeserving of such a humble prospect that I, regardless of your approval (although I’d still very much like it), intend to embark upon acquiring?
For I plan to conquer the world.
The Earth shall be mine, its people my subjects upon whom I will shine the benevolence of my reign, a prosperous rule unequaled on this plane of existence. You poor, simple people I will bring into the enlightened age of semi-divinity, briefly preceded of course by an epoch of darkness during which I will crush all opposition, tear out the hearts of my irredeemable foes, and build pyramids of skulls as monuments to the bloody and holy carnage I’ll raise in order to bring this world into the Golden Age. And all Terra will love me for it and erect great statues of me as a testimony to my brilliance; all will bow forth to me and call me their Lord.
Which of my great and luminescent qualities shall bring this ascension - what aspect of me is the most perfect? Why none I profess for to say one skill is greater is to say all the others are lacking and I, as your destined overlord and supreme master, have no faults that are discernible - nigh, they do not exist. I cannot be improved for I am no mere mortal but a celestial being born into your race for the purpose of perfecting it. It is you who need improving, not I.
But I digress, for my prophecies are not yet finished. Once the Earth is mine and its billions my slaves (that would be all of you just so we’re clear) I will proceed with my most ambitious and high-reaching project of all. I will design (through my advisors of course) and construct (through my slaves of course) an immense and invincible fleet of warships for the purpose of conquering not just this world but all of creation from one star to the next, from one far-flung galaxy to another. All the universe shall know and reap the benefits of my benevolent presence, after of course I’ve conquered their homeworlds, broken their leaders, and destroyed their will to fight.
What have I learned from this proclamation of mine? Why nothing of course, there is nothing I did not already know. But you, dear mortals whom I think of with such great, unfathomable sympathy, you have learned a great deal. You have heard now the destiny that lies before you, the destiny to serve at my feet. I’m sure now your gratitude for learning this inevitability has left you speechless, your little minds awed by my vision. So I forgive you, dear subjects, if you fail to appropriately show gratitude towards me for my having taken the effort to speak to you now.
For the future my plans are very simple. My goals are understandable, reasonable, and perfectly sane. Indeed, I would be very surprised should anyone here demonstrate shock or disapproval at these perfectly rational, straightforward, and premeditated plans for the future. For what have I done to be undeserving of such a humble prospect that I, regardless of your approval (although I’d still very much like it), intend to embark upon acquiring?
For I plan to conquer the world.
The Earth shall be mine, its people my subjects upon whom I will shine the benevolence of my reign, a prosperous rule unequaled on this plane of existence. You poor, simple people I will bring into the enlightened age of semi-divinity, briefly preceded of course by an epoch of darkness during which I will crush all opposition, tear out the hearts of my irredeemable foes, and build pyramids of skulls as monuments to the bloody and holy carnage I’ll raise in order to bring this world into the Golden Age. And all Terra will love me for it and erect great statues of me as a testimony to my brilliance; all will bow forth to me and call me their Lord.
Which of my great and luminescent qualities shall bring this ascension - what aspect of me is the most perfect? Why none I profess for to say one skill is greater is to say all the others are lacking and I, as your destined overlord and supreme master, have no faults that are discernible - nigh, they do not exist. I cannot be improved for I am no mere mortal but a celestial being born into your race for the purpose of perfecting it. It is you who need improving, not I.
But I digress, for my prophecies are not yet finished. Once the Earth is mine and its billions my slaves (that would be all of you just so we’re clear) I will proceed with my most ambitious and high-reaching project of all. I will design (through my advisors of course) and construct (through my slaves of course) an immense and invincible fleet of warships for the purpose of conquering not just this world but all of creation from one star to the next, from one far-flung galaxy to another. All the universe shall know and reap the benefits of my benevolent presence, after of course I’ve conquered their homeworlds, broken their leaders, and destroyed their will to fight.
What have I learned from this proclamation of mine? Why nothing of course, there is nothing I did not already know. But you, dear mortals whom I think of with such great, unfathomable sympathy, you have learned a great deal. You have heard now the destiny that lies before you, the destiny to serve at my feet. I’m sure now your gratitude for learning this inevitability has left you speechless, your little minds awed by my vision. So I forgive you, dear subjects, if you fail to appropriately show gratitude towards me for my having taken the effort to speak to you now.