Death by Strawberry Cheesecake..
I had a pretty awesome weekend, up until the end when i nearly had a icecream & allergies OD and had to go home.
Never be sick and consume ungodly amounts of ice cream no matter HOW delicious it is...was the lesson to be learned. and it was so damn delicious..
You know what? TOTALLY WORTH IT...even though by the time i rushed home i had a super high fever and felt like i was dying.Then..SUPRISE.... like ALL of my dads side of the family is loitering in moms backyard and being loud and refusing to leave, cause its fathers day. And my mom, despite hating my dad & his side of the family enuff to have ..you kno..DIVORCED THEM nearly a decade ago was all "Meh... theyll leave eventually..you deal w/ it...just dont let them inside..." and barricaded herself inside her room. It wasnt pleasant. im really starting to dislike like ALL relatives outside of my brothers and my dog. Thats, about it. Oh and my Baby Cousin Bella and my Baby niece Naya..cause well... theyre too small and too cute to be a pain in the ass ...yet.
I'm SO glad Lee & Donna allowed me to hang out w/ them, cause my mom and step-dad are driving me fucking bonkers.
We watched movies and what not, i as per usual went out of my way NOT to bring up specifics on how im doing. even though i think lee asked a BUNCH of times.
Its not that i dont want to talk about it, it more i feel better about it when im distracted as hell and just dont want to think about it. also, im now officially paying someone to judge and psychoanalyze me for a living and she is DAMN good. 2 weeks into therapy and we're already going to dive head 1st into "childhood truama". Her words not mine. i mean, i cant pretend i have some huge dark past or anything but....well.... i guess i do have stuff to work out or i wouldnt go all doom and gloom every couple of months.
Job hunting is still going terribly. i went on (what i thought) was a fucking stellar interview and i was already clearing my schedule cause i was anticipating mornings re-stocking isles and dealing w/ bitchy customers..... only to never get the call back. i've applied to a few other places but my moms not exactly being awesome about it, and has said already that I dont live here, and i shouldnt be getting comfortable.i would move RIGHT back to my dad's(my complete distrust and uter repulsion of the thought of stepping foot in that ENTIRE neighborhood be damned)but it would be a nightmare.i have no phone, no functioning laptop, and he no longer pays for internet/phone/cable.... so id be going to there to literally disconnect myself from the outside world and..well... DIE OF BOREDOM and Isolation.Forever indoors for fear of leaving the house and being beaten up again.
I digress. Happier thoughts.
Um... ah.... oh WAIT. animenext hapend!
And...was ..wel..sort of lame.
Some really sketchy stuff happend that i had to agree to pretend never happend or else i didnt have a place to crash or a badge to wander the convention floor with. I dont have many guy friends (something my thereapist imediately sideyed and wants to 'talk" about..watvr), and i was looking forward to this cause here this was...a group of guys, who thought i was cool (somethings thats never happend before)and specificly requested me to come and chill w/ them. Except, it quickly became clear to me why i dont.They We are all sexist homophobic douchebags ,aparently.*shrug* All they talked about was how they were going to lure chics up to the room w/ the all the liqour they baught (see? sketchy...and i didnt head back to the room til 5ish...by my lonesome...lord only kno's what happend there). And they just got so boring afterwhile...THEY FUCKING WENT BACK TO THE HOTEL TO WATCH A GORRAM BASKETBALL GAME. 0__o. or was it baseball. idk. i just didnt understand why theyd get a hotel,badges, AND never spend time at the actual convention.
but aparently despite being more friends w/ his gf than him, i had to agree to turn a blind eye to whatever Ceasar got up to with watvr random skank at the rave that night, and im not cool with it. And i dont get why/how its like "guy code"
to be ok with this sort of thing.
I was SO GLAD they let left me alone at the Doctor Who photoshoot. I had SO MUCH fun there. It was AWESOME.
We were all interviewed for this webshow thing... i cant wait til that gets posted.
OH and im so glad they werent there for this.... The photoshoot bled into the MLP meet up, and i spazed out hardcore.
I was being all nonchalant and watching it from afar when a SUPER in character Pinkie Pie came up to me and started chatting me up and then her friend was an AWESOME (and hawt) Rainbow dash and.... and... ok i know its stupid..and lame..but whatever..i was having fun. SO MUCH FUN.
In the middle of a anime con, dressed as 11, Doctor's to the left of me, ponies to the right of me...just general GEEKYNESS everywhere, and theres no place in the world i'd rather have been and it reminded me of why i love cons so much.
I have to get my shit together for comiccon. i cant let ANYTHING get in the way of me having ALL the fun i want there. This year i wont let anything get in my way.i want to go to panels, i wana buy stuff, i wana stay mad late and get there mad early the next day, Im even gona put money aside so i can get a pic w/ Felicia Day <3. After Karen, if i get a pic w/ Felicia, then At some point Deborah Anne Woll (i Hope she's gona be there too for some reason)...i'd of gotten my pic taken w/ like "The hawt geeky ginger trifecta". Im gona get my cosplays together, its gona be SO AMAZING.
SO yeah... i had other stuff to bring up but ill probly post tomorrow... i have a nite of not sleeping much and loitering forums, and tumblr ahead of me...
NIGHT!
Never be sick and consume ungodly amounts of ice cream no matter HOW delicious it is...was the lesson to be learned. and it was so damn delicious..
You know what? TOTALLY WORTH IT...even though by the time i rushed home i had a super high fever and felt like i was dying.Then..SUPRISE.... like ALL of my dads side of the family is loitering in moms backyard and being loud and refusing to leave, cause its fathers day. And my mom, despite hating my dad & his side of the family enuff to have ..you kno..DIVORCED THEM nearly a decade ago was all "Meh... theyll leave eventually..you deal w/ it...just dont let them inside..." and barricaded herself inside her room. It wasnt pleasant. im really starting to dislike like ALL relatives outside of my brothers and my dog. Thats, about it. Oh and my Baby Cousin Bella and my Baby niece Naya..cause well... theyre too small and too cute to be a pain in the ass ...yet.
I'm SO glad Lee & Donna allowed me to hang out w/ them, cause my mom and step-dad are driving me fucking bonkers.
We watched movies and what not, i as per usual went out of my way NOT to bring up specifics on how im doing. even though i think lee asked a BUNCH of times.
Its not that i dont want to talk about it, it more i feel better about it when im distracted as hell and just dont want to think about it. also, im now officially paying someone to judge and psychoanalyze me for a living and she is DAMN good. 2 weeks into therapy and we're already going to dive head 1st into "childhood truama". Her words not mine. i mean, i cant pretend i have some huge dark past or anything but....well.... i guess i do have stuff to work out or i wouldnt go all doom and gloom every couple of months.
Job hunting is still going terribly. i went on (what i thought) was a fucking stellar interview and i was already clearing my schedule cause i was anticipating mornings re-stocking isles and dealing w/ bitchy customers..... only to never get the call back. i've applied to a few other places but my moms not exactly being awesome about it, and has said already that I dont live here, and i shouldnt be getting comfortable.i would move RIGHT back to my dad's(my complete distrust and uter repulsion of the thought of stepping foot in that ENTIRE neighborhood be damned)but it would be a nightmare.i have no phone, no functioning laptop, and he no longer pays for internet/phone/cable.... so id be going to there to literally disconnect myself from the outside world and..well... DIE OF BOREDOM and Isolation.Forever indoors for fear of leaving the house and being beaten up again.
I digress. Happier thoughts.
Um... ah.... oh WAIT. animenext hapend!
And...was ..wel..sort of lame.
Some really sketchy stuff happend that i had to agree to pretend never happend or else i didnt have a place to crash or a badge to wander the convention floor with. I dont have many guy friends (something my thereapist imediately sideyed and wants to 'talk" about..watvr), and i was looking forward to this cause here this was...a group of guys, who thought i was cool (somethings thats never happend before)and specificly requested me to come and chill w/ them. Except, it quickly became clear to me why i dont.They We are all sexist homophobic douchebags ,aparently.*shrug* All they talked about was how they were going to lure chics up to the room w/ the all the liqour they baught (see? sketchy...and i didnt head back to the room til 5ish...by my lonesome...lord only kno's what happend there). And they just got so boring afterwhile...THEY FUCKING WENT BACK TO THE HOTEL TO WATCH A GORRAM BASKETBALL GAME. 0__o. or was it baseball. idk. i just didnt understand why theyd get a hotel,badges, AND never spend time at the actual convention.
but aparently despite being more friends w/ his gf than him, i had to agree to turn a blind eye to whatever Ceasar got up to with watvr random skank at the rave that night, and im not cool with it. And i dont get why/how its like "guy code"
to be ok with this sort of thing.
I was SO GLAD they let left me alone at the Doctor Who photoshoot. I had SO MUCH fun there. It was AWESOME.
We were all interviewed for this webshow thing... i cant wait til that gets posted.
OH and im so glad they werent there for this.... The photoshoot bled into the MLP meet up, and i spazed out hardcore.
I was being all nonchalant and watching it from afar when a SUPER in character Pinkie Pie came up to me and started chatting me up and then her friend was an AWESOME (and hawt) Rainbow dash and.... and... ok i know its stupid..and lame..but whatever..i was having fun. SO MUCH FUN.
In the middle of a anime con, dressed as 11, Doctor's to the left of me, ponies to the right of me...just general GEEKYNESS everywhere, and theres no place in the world i'd rather have been and it reminded me of why i love cons so much.
I have to get my shit together for comiccon. i cant let ANYTHING get in the way of me having ALL the fun i want there. This year i wont let anything get in my way.i want to go to panels, i wana buy stuff, i wana stay mad late and get there mad early the next day, Im even gona put money aside so i can get a pic w/ Felicia Day <3. After Karen, if i get a pic w/ Felicia, then At some point Deborah Anne Woll (i Hope she's gona be there too for some reason)...i'd of gotten my pic taken w/ like "The hawt geeky ginger trifecta". Im gona get my cosplays together, its gona be SO AMAZING.
SO yeah... i had other stuff to bring up but ill probly post tomorrow... i have a nite of not sleeping much and loitering forums, and tumblr ahead of me...
NIGHT!