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User Name/Nick: Ari
User LJ: rivin
AIM/IM: FallenSun13
E-mail: redrobin133@gmail.com
Other Characters: T'Pol, Tim, Cooper
Character Name: B'Elanna Torres
Series: Star Trek: Voyager
Age: 25
From When?: 4x03, 'Day of Honor'
Inmate/Warden: Warden. B'Elanna's a hot head like no other, but she's a very moral person. She doesn't like compromising them for the sake of...well, anything.
Item: Her comm badge.
Abilities/Powers: B'Elanna's pretty normal. She's half-Klingon, but she's pretty adamant that all that heritage gave her was the forehead and the temper. Her blood's still red, and she's about as fragile as a regular human. But she's an awesome engineer. That's about it.
Personality: B'Elanna's not an easy person to get to know. She's the sort who, for a long time, was more likely to break your arm than to hold a conversation with you. She's got a much better handle on that impulse control now, but Her fuse is still pretty short: it's not difficult at all to make her suspicious, or worse, make her angry. Shouting PetaQ at someone is the very least of what she's usually inclined to do. Call it that Klingon blood, but B'Elanna has a lot of trouble regulating her emotions - particularly the violent ones. She harbors a lot of anger, at a lot of people - her mother, her father, and often herself. She's frequently too angry to feel much else - especially apologetic. "There is too much anger in your heart to be sorry" - that is what B'Elanna's mother told her, and it's true; though B'Elanna wasn't particularly inclined to believe that. She doesn't deal well with authority - and that involves being told what she does or does not feel, even - or especially - when it's true.
When she was very young, B'Elanna's father walked out on her and her mother. That, coupled with the memories of the way her parents would argue about all things Klingon, convinced her in that way small children sometimes have that he was leaving because of her. She was only half-Klingon, but that was enough to drive him away. It left its mark on her; B'Elanna has an innate frustration with her Klingon self. She hates the traditions, the religions, the way they go on and on about honor and the way of the warrior - every reference makes her feel like a child again, being shoved in one direction and rebelling in the other. Learning that her father disapproved of her Klingon half didn't help matters any; it just made her hate that part of herself all the more. The relationship she had with her mother suffered greatly for it - she couldn't vocalize her guilt over her father leaving, and shifted some of the blame to her mother, which strained their bond a lot. B'elanna's had the chance to deal with all those feelings in her time on Voyager - but they're never really going to leave completely.
Growing up, she felt alone, outcast - and sure, children can be mean when they see something different, they'll pick at it until it flails, and that was the case with B'Elanna - but instead of finding some strength to tolerate it, she did what most middle school-aged children do. She withdrew. It's easier to avoid being hurt when you avoid the people who hurt you. That's not to say she did nothing when provoked; stoicism has never been her way, and probably never will be. B'Elanna didn't do herself any favors as a child. She would choose to read instead of having fun with her family, she'd avoid those social interactions on the assumption that she was unliked, unloved, and better off alone.
No kid wants to feel that way. Especially when they're growing up one way, while everyone else seems to be growing up another. She wanted to fit in - all children do. And she wanted her parents to be more like she thought everyone else's parents were. A lot of her issues can be traced back to her early childhood. She blames herself for most of the misery she went through as a child - though to get her to admit that, you have to be a pretty special person. She blamed her half-Klingon nature and appearance for the way she was treated, and she blamed herself, her temper, her frustration, for telling her father to leave. Most cases of divorce have nothing to do with the children who have to live through it - but as irrational as it may be, B'Elanna can't help but hold herself accountable for it. She's spent ten years holding herself accountable for it.
B'Elanna is slow to make connections with people, and she often misreads them. She has a tendency to keep everyone at arm's length, out of a sense of self-protection; if you don't care so much about people, it doesn't hurt as badly when they leave - or worse, disappoint. Of course, that goes both ways - B'Elanna's used to being a disappointment, too, to both of her parents. She clearly has plenty of issues about not being human enough where her father is concerned, but she was never quite Klingon enough for her mother, either. It was like constantly being torn between two worlds; her certainty that her father left because of her and her mother, B'Elanna is much more inclined to reject the Klingon side of herself. She has no honor, no glory, and for the most part, she prefers it that way. The less she can be accused of being honorless, or a mongrel child, or of taking the easy way out - even if it's the way that makes the most sense - the better.
Her time on Voyager has been instrumental to B'elanna's growth. When she first boarded as a Maquis rebel, she was twenty-two, angry at the world, short tempered - she was little more than an unruly teenager. Her years in the Delta Quadrant forced her to grow up, however. She's learned - well, is learning - to keep her temper in check, at least sometimes. That doesn't stop her from being stubborn, though, sometimes to the point of ridiculousness: when B'Elanna sets her mind on something, she'll do it, no matter who decides to get in her way. At least there's some balance, though - for all that B'Elanna can be pessimistic, or blunt, or sarcastic, she's also extremely dedicated. Once she has a job to do, that she wants to do, that she may even enjoy, no one can get in her way. She'll barrel them over with a hypospanner first. That stretches to friends, too; since it's so hard for her to make connections with people, she holds fast to them once they exist. Which means that she deals with losing those people very, very poorly. Whether it's betrayal (here's looking at you, Sesca), or actual loss, B'Elanna's reactions tend to be less than healthy. If it's not rage, it's depression - cripplingly so. And it takes a lot to knock her out of a mindframe like that.
Path to Redemption: --
History: Here. Because I am lazy. And she's done a lot of stuff.
Sample Journal Entry: [The feed flips on, and B'Elanna's sitting at her desk, studying a PADD. She's in a yellow, twenty-fourth century Starfleet uniform, and the way she's frowning at what she's reading makes her cranial ridges more prominent. But it's only a few seconds before she discards the PADD onto the desk, and looks up.]
Right. So as I understand it, this ship is a little like a traveling penal colony. Not exactly a setting I'm familiar with, but. [She shrugs, looking nonchalant, and turns away, snorting to herself.] Of course Tom's never around when he'd be useful. So. Since I don't get myself an inmate until God knows when, who can point me toward engineering?
Sample RP: If this was the engine room, she wanted to go back to Voyager.
It was - well, it looked like equal parts junk and unbelievably complex technology, and she couldn't tell where one part ended and the other began. There were no warp coils, no warp core, and hell if she could find impulse drive. Just how this juggernaut of a ship moved was beyond her - which made the engine room both completely frustrating, and utterly fascinating.
All the free time was making her itch; she still didn't have an inmate, and half the people who knew what Starfleet meant were from centuries ago. She didn't have duty shifts, and she didn't have any place to blow off some steam besides the gym - and as holodecks went, the CES was pretty pitiful. (But that was another thing that was almost as amazing as it was ridiculous.)
In any case, the lack of something to do with herself saw her returning more and more often to the engine room. She could handle the total lack of command structure - even if it had been four years since she'd been with the Maquis. It wasn't like she needed Starfleet, or their rules and regulations. More often than not, they were a frustration. And if she took the time to sit down for one retrospective moment, she'd probably realize that she did miss it, at least a little. But she never sat to have that moment, which meant it wasn't long before she was spending every waking moment getting to know the Barge's engine.
It felt like being back at the Academy, sometimes - like she still had no idea what she was doing, and someone was standing around waiting for her to screw up - and no matter how much experience she'd gained on Voyager, nothing seemed to match up with the Barge's systems. There were no bioneural processes, not even any replicators, and not a gel pack in sight. She didn't get how the whole thing ran itself, and there was no way she was just accepting magic. Maybe there were anti-neutrinos at work, maybe it was folding space around it - but she didn't have any scanners high tech enough to figure it out!
Crossing her arms, B'Elanna stood at the entrance to the engine room, what she was starting to think of as her own personal engineering section (though there were probably plenty of people who'd object to that). She shook her head, smiling a tense little smile, one that really wasn't about mirth. It was all about determination. She was going to figure this thing out if it killed her.
And apparently, she'd just wake up in the infirmary later, anyway. Seemed like a decent deal.
Special Notes: --
User LJ: rivin
AIM/IM: FallenSun13
E-mail: redrobin133@gmail.com
Other Characters: T'Pol, Tim, Cooper
Character Name: B'Elanna Torres
Series: Star Trek: Voyager
Age: 25
From When?: 4x03, 'Day of Honor'
Inmate/Warden: Warden. B'Elanna's a hot head like no other, but she's a very moral person. She doesn't like compromising them for the sake of...well, anything.
Item: Her comm badge.
Abilities/Powers: B'Elanna's pretty normal. She's half-Klingon, but she's pretty adamant that all that heritage gave her was the forehead and the temper. Her blood's still red, and she's about as fragile as a regular human. But she's an awesome engineer. That's about it.
Personality: B'Elanna's not an easy person to get to know. She's the sort who, for a long time, was more likely to break your arm than to hold a conversation with you. She's got a much better handle on that impulse control now, but Her fuse is still pretty short: it's not difficult at all to make her suspicious, or worse, make her angry. Shouting PetaQ at someone is the very least of what she's usually inclined to do. Call it that Klingon blood, but B'Elanna has a lot of trouble regulating her emotions - particularly the violent ones. She harbors a lot of anger, at a lot of people - her mother, her father, and often herself. She's frequently too angry to feel much else - especially apologetic. "There is too much anger in your heart to be sorry" - that is what B'Elanna's mother told her, and it's true; though B'Elanna wasn't particularly inclined to believe that. She doesn't deal well with authority - and that involves being told what she does or does not feel, even - or especially - when it's true.
When she was very young, B'Elanna's father walked out on her and her mother. That, coupled with the memories of the way her parents would argue about all things Klingon, convinced her in that way small children sometimes have that he was leaving because of her. She was only half-Klingon, but that was enough to drive him away. It left its mark on her; B'Elanna has an innate frustration with her Klingon self. She hates the traditions, the religions, the way they go on and on about honor and the way of the warrior - every reference makes her feel like a child again, being shoved in one direction and rebelling in the other. Learning that her father disapproved of her Klingon half didn't help matters any; it just made her hate that part of herself all the more. The relationship she had with her mother suffered greatly for it - she couldn't vocalize her guilt over her father leaving, and shifted some of the blame to her mother, which strained their bond a lot. B'elanna's had the chance to deal with all those feelings in her time on Voyager - but they're never really going to leave completely.
Growing up, she felt alone, outcast - and sure, children can be mean when they see something different, they'll pick at it until it flails, and that was the case with B'Elanna - but instead of finding some strength to tolerate it, she did what most middle school-aged children do. She withdrew. It's easier to avoid being hurt when you avoid the people who hurt you. That's not to say she did nothing when provoked; stoicism has never been her way, and probably never will be. B'Elanna didn't do herself any favors as a child. She would choose to read instead of having fun with her family, she'd avoid those social interactions on the assumption that she was unliked, unloved, and better off alone.
No kid wants to feel that way. Especially when they're growing up one way, while everyone else seems to be growing up another. She wanted to fit in - all children do. And she wanted her parents to be more like she thought everyone else's parents were. A lot of her issues can be traced back to her early childhood. She blames herself for most of the misery she went through as a child - though to get her to admit that, you have to be a pretty special person. She blamed her half-Klingon nature and appearance for the way she was treated, and she blamed herself, her temper, her frustration, for telling her father to leave. Most cases of divorce have nothing to do with the children who have to live through it - but as irrational as it may be, B'Elanna can't help but hold herself accountable for it. She's spent ten years holding herself accountable for it.
B'Elanna is slow to make connections with people, and she often misreads them. She has a tendency to keep everyone at arm's length, out of a sense of self-protection; if you don't care so much about people, it doesn't hurt as badly when they leave - or worse, disappoint. Of course, that goes both ways - B'Elanna's used to being a disappointment, too, to both of her parents. She clearly has plenty of issues about not being human enough where her father is concerned, but she was never quite Klingon enough for her mother, either. It was like constantly being torn between two worlds; her certainty that her father left because of her and her mother, B'Elanna is much more inclined to reject the Klingon side of herself. She has no honor, no glory, and for the most part, she prefers it that way. The less she can be accused of being honorless, or a mongrel child, or of taking the easy way out - even if it's the way that makes the most sense - the better.
Her time on Voyager has been instrumental to B'elanna's growth. When she first boarded as a Maquis rebel, she was twenty-two, angry at the world, short tempered - she was little more than an unruly teenager. Her years in the Delta Quadrant forced her to grow up, however. She's learned - well, is learning - to keep her temper in check, at least sometimes. That doesn't stop her from being stubborn, though, sometimes to the point of ridiculousness: when B'Elanna sets her mind on something, she'll do it, no matter who decides to get in her way. At least there's some balance, though - for all that B'Elanna can be pessimistic, or blunt, or sarcastic, she's also extremely dedicated. Once she has a job to do, that she wants to do, that she may even enjoy, no one can get in her way. She'll barrel them over with a hypospanner first. That stretches to friends, too; since it's so hard for her to make connections with people, she holds fast to them once they exist. Which means that she deals with losing those people very, very poorly. Whether it's betrayal (here's looking at you, Sesca), or actual loss, B'Elanna's reactions tend to be less than healthy. If it's not rage, it's depression - cripplingly so. And it takes a lot to knock her out of a mindframe like that.
Path to Redemption: --
History: Here. Because I am lazy. And she's done a lot of stuff.
Sample Journal Entry: [The feed flips on, and B'Elanna's sitting at her desk, studying a PADD. She's in a yellow, twenty-fourth century Starfleet uniform, and the way she's frowning at what she's reading makes her cranial ridges more prominent. But it's only a few seconds before she discards the PADD onto the desk, and looks up.]
Right. So as I understand it, this ship is a little like a traveling penal colony. Not exactly a setting I'm familiar with, but. [She shrugs, looking nonchalant, and turns away, snorting to herself.] Of course Tom's never around when he'd be useful. So. Since I don't get myself an inmate until God knows when, who can point me toward engineering?
Sample RP: If this was the engine room, she wanted to go back to Voyager.
It was - well, it looked like equal parts junk and unbelievably complex technology, and she couldn't tell where one part ended and the other began. There were no warp coils, no warp core, and hell if she could find impulse drive. Just how this juggernaut of a ship moved was beyond her - which made the engine room both completely frustrating, and utterly fascinating.
All the free time was making her itch; she still didn't have an inmate, and half the people who knew what Starfleet meant were from centuries ago. She didn't have duty shifts, and she didn't have any place to blow off some steam besides the gym - and as holodecks went, the CES was pretty pitiful. (But that was another thing that was almost as amazing as it was ridiculous.)
In any case, the lack of something to do with herself saw her returning more and more often to the engine room. She could handle the total lack of command structure - even if it had been four years since she'd been with the Maquis. It wasn't like she needed Starfleet, or their rules and regulations. More often than not, they were a frustration. And if she took the time to sit down for one retrospective moment, she'd probably realize that she did miss it, at least a little. But she never sat to have that moment, which meant it wasn't long before she was spending every waking moment getting to know the Barge's engine.
It felt like being back at the Academy, sometimes - like she still had no idea what she was doing, and someone was standing around waiting for her to screw up - and no matter how much experience she'd gained on Voyager, nothing seemed to match up with the Barge's systems. There were no bioneural processes, not even any replicators, and not a gel pack in sight. She didn't get how the whole thing ran itself, and there was no way she was just accepting magic. Maybe there were anti-neutrinos at work, maybe it was folding space around it - but she didn't have any scanners high tech enough to figure it out!
Crossing her arms, B'Elanna stood at the entrance to the engine room, what she was starting to think of as her own personal engineering section (though there were probably plenty of people who'd object to that). She shook her head, smiling a tense little smile, one that really wasn't about mirth. It was all about determination. She was going to figure this thing out if it killed her.
And apparently, she'd just wake up in the infirmary later, anyway. Seemed like a decent deal.
Special Notes: --