yeah, uh-huh, alright, lets go.
Good because i got my tax return back.
Good cause i got to pay bill off the money i owed him
good cause i can pay ave off the money i owe him
good cause i paid my late charges at the video store
bad cause i had to break my window to get into my room cause i locked myself out
good cause emily didnt close tonight
good cause -I- didnt have to close tonight
good cause i got off at 10 instead, and went to 'the station' (gag) which is a bar uptown to celebrate a co-workers bday with a few other co-workers.
good cause i had a good time.
good cause afterwards i watched some videos and drank a few beers at the coworkers house and chilled out, walked around town for a while.
bad cause i had to walk a 20 minute walk home in sprinkling rain.
good cause i had to walk a 20 minute walk home in sprinking rain.
bad cause i came home to no new email! grr!
so really it was a lot more good than bad. which is indeed good. but the somewhat bad thing in every second of the good was that i keep thinking about my whore of an ex girlfriend. everything i do reminds me of something that we'd do or she'd do or she liked or i liked but she didnt or something, just everything possible reminds me of her and its bullshit. the music at work plays entirely too many dave matthews songs. bullshit. i dunno. i guess its just like, i know maybe i wasnt the greatest to her, as far as she was concerned, but i dont think i did anything to wrong to her to deserve what happened. and anyone that thinks otherwise is fucking stupid and biased and doesnt know the real story. i guess this is what happens when you have someone in your life so intensely for a while. actually i know this is how it is, ive been through this all before. i need something else, not necessarily someone else particularly, just something, besides work and sleep, and getting drunk. granted going out and getting drunk is actually something, it just usually makes me think of her more often, about how i never liked getting drunk with her cause she was an idiot when we were drunk. but i guess its at least getting out with people, in a slim chance to meet more people... whatever. i dont know if i want to know those kinds of people, but i dont really want to know other people that dont drink, cause those people are usually weird. or they wouldnt agree to other things in my life. i guess i just havent given them a chance but im not sure i really care to. i dont know, im just bored, bitter, angry, tired, and lonely i guess. in all this im optimistic though. for i get to go through what i once had with her all over again with someone else, and those first few times of seeing someone you really like are crazy happy times. its just when it gets around to being like that again is the downer.
Id like to thank kate for getting me addicted to AFI.
speaking of which, im going to post more lyrics. these are the lyrics 'evil lyrics' gives me, so im not positive they're all right, but i really dont care, and i know im a member of a community that posts lyrics. but i dont wanna put them up there right now...
Will you join me in this dance, this dance of misery
Cradled in imposs... impossibility?
Swooning, I am swept away
Swept off my feet, with step by step by step
We take the lead as drop by drop, then we bleed
Oh, we dance in misery
(And we dance on, and we dance on)
Oh, we dance in misery
(All lost in the arms of our misery, oh)
Oh, we dance in misery
(And we dance on, and we dance on)
Swept off our feet by our misery, we're swept into the shadows
Will you lend yourself to beauty that will horrify?
Let me hide within your black, the still inside your eyes
Deafened, caught within a cry
So sensual, as step by step by step, I seperate
As breath to breath, as I... suffocate
(Oh, we dance in misery)
And we dance on, and we dance on
(Oh, we dance in misery)
All lost in the arms of our misery, oh
(Oh, we dance in misery)
And we dance on, and we dance on
Swept off our feet by our misery, we're swept into the shadows
So who will follow? Who is the lead?
I know I'll leave a stain, because I bleed
As we dance, we all dance
We all... have no chance in this horrid romance
(Oh, we dance in misery)
And we dance on, and we dance on
(Oh, we dance in misery)
All lost in the arms of our misery, oh
(Oh, we dance in misery)
And we dance on, and we dance on
Swept off our feet by our misery, we're swept into the shadows
Swept off our feet by our misery, we're swept into the shadows
Im so cool, you dont even know im cool.