13th Floor Vendetta
I am reasonably calm enough to commit my thoughts to writing. I am extremely irritated and angry. If Black's purpose on this earth is the make my life a endless loop of torment and misery, he has succeeded.
These are the facts as they stand now.
Sir Martyr decided to play a "harmless" prank. The prank in question being a rather simple spell that transformed my shampoo into a hair bleaching solution. The results? Almost immediate bleaching of my black hair into some golden monstrosity. Unfortunately, I am unable to darken the shade because the spell is irreversible for a day span. Any "reverse" potions I could concoct would take longer to brew than it would to simply wait it out. So, I decided instead of trying to reverse the spell I would accelerate it. There is now an absence of all color. It is simply pitch white.
White is preferable to gold in my opinion. And white doesn't clash with my clothing at all. While the Malfoys can wear those platinum tresses to great effect, Snapes simply cannot. However, the pitch white doesn't look so bad. But I will certainly be more comfortable once I can have my old color back.
I will have to admit that I am mildly disturbed by the thought that Sirius Black was in my personal space. This is the second time he's broken into my rooms for malicious and unforgivable pranks. It's positively creepy. Think about it - it's like Gilderoy Lockhart going around sniffing underwear in the girls’ dormitory. It’s enough to revisit the contents of your stomach. I’ve never gone into HIS rooms to play out a childish prank. I have to wonder what it is about my rooms that compel him to break and enter. I shall have to put up stronger wards, perhaps a nice electrocution spell. That’ll train the mangy cur.
Have your fun now Black, go ahead. Enjoy your paltry victory. I will have my revenge. In fact, I've already put phase one into action. Just know that any second you will get your comeuppance. You will suffer in the pitch-black pit of the lowest level of HELL for doing this to my hair! You will rue the day you snuck into my quarters, Black! By Grabthar's hammer, by the sons of Salazar Slytherin himself, I shall be avenged!!!
Ahem, in other news - Potter smirked in my direction in the Great Hall this afternoon. This, of course, cannot endure. When I demanded to know if there was something that amused him, he had the gall to choke back a laugh and deny everything. Good plan - if the person in question had a halfway decent poker face. However, our Celebrity has no such talent.
I gave out a detention for Longbottom to be served in Potter's stead for Potter's lack of respect for a teacher. The boy's pathetic squeaking soothed my frayed nerves for a few seconds. Of course, this was met with indignation from the rest of the table, but I got my point across. I would like to state I felt terribly after making Neville Longbottom cry like a girly shirt, but we all know that would be a complete lie.
Detention List:
Hermione Granger
Ron Weasley
Lavender Brown
Parvati Patil
Neville Longbottom
Seamus Finnigan
Dean Thomas
Ginny Weasley
Colin Creevey
The rest of Gryffindor
Hufflepuff House
Ravenclaw House
By the Gods, you would think that Potter would get the picture. His academic performance is alarmingly poor, he relies on Granger too much for his homework. Perhaps if I pair him up with a Slytherin partner, he would shape up. Of course, that would be punishing the Slytherin, but I am at my wit's end. I shall endeavor to make the detentions and essays even more difficult and strenuous.
Later, as usual, the meeting of the now-penned Hogwarts Vicious Circle (a.k.a., Hooch, Sinistra and me on our cigarette break) descended into pure spite and malice. After silently bearing their catcalls of "blondie" and enduring more than a decent number of blonde jokes, the break degenerated with Sinistra being positively outraged that Narcissa called her "pear shaped." All I could do was shrug and continue smoking. I happen to think Narcissa a very charming woman. But I can well understand the compulsion to smite anyone who dares to personally insult you. Oh, I know it very well.
Hooch was being her normal dry sarcastic self. Oh, I haven't forgiven her for vacating the seat next to me at the head table when Black said he wanted it for something or other. Slytherin memory is very long. But we three understand each other and have formed somewhat of a truce if you will. So, this means that I get to drag them with me for the Dreaded Dinner.
We really don’t know what to expect at the dinner invitation. I am going to go on the side of caution and not let myself get drawn into any secret corridors, thank you very much. Now, I am in no way claiming that Lucius is a shady character, but there might be something to be said about the mutterings about being invited to Malfoy Manor. “Malfoy Manor: Wizards Check In, but They Don’t Check Out”; which is only slightly worse than, “Join the Death Eaters: They Eat Their Own”. Hardly a good campaign slogan.
Voldemort was right to fire that particular PR agency.
These are the facts as they stand now.
Sir Martyr decided to play a "harmless" prank. The prank in question being a rather simple spell that transformed my shampoo into a hair bleaching solution. The results? Almost immediate bleaching of my black hair into some golden monstrosity. Unfortunately, I am unable to darken the shade because the spell is irreversible for a day span. Any "reverse" potions I could concoct would take longer to brew than it would to simply wait it out. So, I decided instead of trying to reverse the spell I would accelerate it. There is now an absence of all color. It is simply pitch white.
White is preferable to gold in my opinion. And white doesn't clash with my clothing at all. While the Malfoys can wear those platinum tresses to great effect, Snapes simply cannot. However, the pitch white doesn't look so bad. But I will certainly be more comfortable once I can have my old color back.
I will have to admit that I am mildly disturbed by the thought that Sirius Black was in my personal space. This is the second time he's broken into my rooms for malicious and unforgivable pranks. It's positively creepy. Think about it - it's like Gilderoy Lockhart going around sniffing underwear in the girls’ dormitory. It’s enough to revisit the contents of your stomach. I’ve never gone into HIS rooms to play out a childish prank. I have to wonder what it is about my rooms that compel him to break and enter. I shall have to put up stronger wards, perhaps a nice electrocution spell. That’ll train the mangy cur.
Have your fun now Black, go ahead. Enjoy your paltry victory. I will have my revenge. In fact, I've already put phase one into action. Just know that any second you will get your comeuppance. You will suffer in the pitch-black pit of the lowest level of HELL for doing this to my hair! You will rue the day you snuck into my quarters, Black! By Grabthar's hammer, by the sons of Salazar Slytherin himself, I shall be avenged!!!
Ahem, in other news - Potter smirked in my direction in the Great Hall this afternoon. This, of course, cannot endure. When I demanded to know if there was something that amused him, he had the gall to choke back a laugh and deny everything. Good plan - if the person in question had a halfway decent poker face. However, our Celebrity has no such talent.
I gave out a detention for Longbottom to be served in Potter's stead for Potter's lack of respect for a teacher. The boy's pathetic squeaking soothed my frayed nerves for a few seconds. Of course, this was met with indignation from the rest of the table, but I got my point across. I would like to state I felt terribly after making Neville Longbottom cry like a girly shirt, but we all know that would be a complete lie.
Detention List:
Hermione Granger
Ron Weasley
Lavender Brown
Parvati Patil
Neville Longbottom
Seamus Finnigan
Dean Thomas
Ginny Weasley
Colin Creevey
The rest of Gryffindor
Hufflepuff House
Ravenclaw House
By the Gods, you would think that Potter would get the picture. His academic performance is alarmingly poor, he relies on Granger too much for his homework. Perhaps if I pair him up with a Slytherin partner, he would shape up. Of course, that would be punishing the Slytherin, but I am at my wit's end. I shall endeavor to make the detentions and essays even more difficult and strenuous.
Later, as usual, the meeting of the now-penned Hogwarts Vicious Circle (a.k.a., Hooch, Sinistra and me on our cigarette break) descended into pure spite and malice. After silently bearing their catcalls of "blondie" and enduring more than a decent number of blonde jokes, the break degenerated with Sinistra being positively outraged that Narcissa called her "pear shaped." All I could do was shrug and continue smoking. I happen to think Narcissa a very charming woman. But I can well understand the compulsion to smite anyone who dares to personally insult you. Oh, I know it very well.
Hooch was being her normal dry sarcastic self. Oh, I haven't forgiven her for vacating the seat next to me at the head table when Black said he wanted it for something or other. Slytherin memory is very long. But we three understand each other and have formed somewhat of a truce if you will. So, this means that I get to drag them with me for the Dreaded Dinner.
We really don’t know what to expect at the dinner invitation. I am going to go on the side of caution and not let myself get drawn into any secret corridors, thank you very much. Now, I am in no way claiming that Lucius is a shady character, but there might be something to be said about the mutterings about being invited to Malfoy Manor. “Malfoy Manor: Wizards Check In, but They Don’t Check Out”; which is only slightly worse than, “Join the Death Eaters: They Eat Their Own”. Hardly a good campaign slogan.
Voldemort was right to fire that particular PR agency.