(no subject)
General announcement: Severus Snape is a psychopath. I sit here, suffering from: not one, not two, but THREE stab wounds from your unstable, much vaunted Potions master. Stab wounds from a fork, no less, so I have to commend the man his inventiveness as no other deadly weapons were at hand. God forbid we'd been having steak...
What did I do to deserve such abuse, you may ask? Why, nothing at all. I merely slipped as I was passing Remus the spaghetti, and Snape happened to be in the way. A few, unnoticeable specks of sauce landed on his sadly outdated clothing, and the man went absolutely insane.
I tell you, Severus Snape should not be allowed around children. He is homicidal. I could have bled to death. He is extremely lucky there will be no scar defacing my otherwise flawless skin.
I may have slipped with the pumpkin juice as well, but that must have been due to the extreme agony I was in from the first stab wound. The rest was not my fault at all.
~Sirius
What did I do to deserve such abuse, you may ask? Why, nothing at all. I merely slipped as I was passing Remus the spaghetti, and Snape happened to be in the way. A few, unnoticeable specks of sauce landed on his sadly outdated clothing, and the man went absolutely insane.
I tell you, Severus Snape should not be allowed around children. He is homicidal. I could have bled to death. He is extremely lucky there will be no scar defacing my otherwise flawless skin.
I may have slipped with the pumpkin juice as well, but that must have been due to the extreme agony I was in from the first stab wound. The rest was not my fault at all.
~Sirius