For creative_muses
Drinks like a fish
Kara has a problem. When people tell her that, she fives them the infamous Starbuck grin, a carefree shrug of her shoulders and follows it with another swig of her drink, whatever alcoholic nectar of choice she has in her hand at the time. Never seen without some kind of drink in her hand, people rarely see Kara Thrace sober (never completely drunk either, but Kara firmly believes that she’s a nicer person when she’s drunk than when she’s sober). Not that she seems to care, or even consider her drinking excessive or a problem. It helps her sleep, it helps her wake up, it keeps her smiling, it stops her from breaking down. She never drinks behind the stick of her viper though, she knows better than that (usually), knows she needs to be focused but when it’s all too much and she feels like she’s drowning and worthless the rush of the alcohol is the only thing that makes her feel alive, and when she fraks up out there and puts herself in danger, she senses the anger around her for the ship she nearly damaged, the parts she nearly destroyed instead of the life that was nearly lost.
Anders gives her a glass, the green nectar inside already warming her throat. He lets her drink and he lets her waste her time and life because he knows it’s the only way he can bond with her. It’s the only way she’ll let him. Gods know she doesn’t kiss him sober anymore and she certainly never lets him touch her when she’s sober. When they’re together she thinks of someone else’s hands on her skin, in her hair, moving against her and inside her. Her wedding ring never returns to her finger.
The guilt is all consuming and so she drinks again, a never ending cycle, drinking more in the hopes that it will make everything stop.
It never does, but Kara will keep on trying because short of letting one of those tin-can bastards out there kill her when she’s flying (and everyone can mourn the loss of another viper, tear it apart for scrap), it’s all she can do to feel something.
Muse: Kara “Starbuck” Thrace
Fandom: Battlestar Galactica
Word Count: 367
Kara has a problem. When people tell her that, she fives them the infamous Starbuck grin, a carefree shrug of her shoulders and follows it with another swig of her drink, whatever alcoholic nectar of choice she has in her hand at the time. Never seen without some kind of drink in her hand, people rarely see Kara Thrace sober (never completely drunk either, but Kara firmly believes that she’s a nicer person when she’s drunk than when she’s sober). Not that she seems to care, or even consider her drinking excessive or a problem. It helps her sleep, it helps her wake up, it keeps her smiling, it stops her from breaking down. She never drinks behind the stick of her viper though, she knows better than that (usually), knows she needs to be focused but when it’s all too much and she feels like she’s drowning and worthless the rush of the alcohol is the only thing that makes her feel alive, and when she fraks up out there and puts herself in danger, she senses the anger around her for the ship she nearly damaged, the parts she nearly destroyed instead of the life that was nearly lost.
Anders gives her a glass, the green nectar inside already warming her throat. He lets her drink and he lets her waste her time and life because he knows it’s the only way he can bond with her. It’s the only way she’ll let him. Gods know she doesn’t kiss him sober anymore and she certainly never lets him touch her when she’s sober. When they’re together she thinks of someone else’s hands on her skin, in her hair, moving against her and inside her. Her wedding ring never returns to her finger.
The guilt is all consuming and so she drinks again, a never ending cycle, drinking more in the hopes that it will make everything stop.
It never does, but Kara will keep on trying because short of letting one of those tin-can bastards out there kill her when she’s flying (and everyone can mourn the loss of another viper, tear it apart for scrap), it’s all she can do to feel something.
Muse: Kara “Starbuck” Thrace
Fandom: Battlestar Galactica
Word Count: 367