What does "T.M.I." stand for?
This morning I had some minor surgery done...it was my first experience having any sort of medical procedure done in Japan, and I was way nervous...and it hurt like a motherfucker, but I'm doing fine.
So...guess who learned how to say "anal abscess" in Japanese, today?
Yes, that's right. I developed an abscess on my butt...well...in my butt...well...you know...right around....that area. At first I thought it was a wicked case of the 'rhoids, but the increasing pain made it apparent that this was something worse.
It started last Wednesday as a little bit of nothing...by Friday it hurt significantly but I was still walking about...then by Saturday afternoon I was canceling plans and staying in bed...by Sunday I could NOT get out of bed! It's really quite scary how quickly it progressed. By Sunday the pain was so bad that every little cough, laugh, sneeze, clench, whatever....produced cries of pain. Same for rolling over, standing up, etc...sitting down was absolutely out of the question, as was using the toilet (not that I had to; by then I'd completely lost my appetite and had stopped eating entirely).
Believe me, I would've gone to the doctor on Friday, but...THE HOSPITAL ONLY ACCEPTS PATIENTS FROM 8:30am-!!:00pm. Unless you're an emergency case, which...I suppose I wasn't. So yeah, I had work on Friday. But Ted, why didn't you just go on Saturday? BECAUSE THE HOSPITAL IS CLOSED OVER THE WEEKEND. Lord.
So I spent Sunday evening tossing and turning and crying out, literally watching the clock and counting the minutes because I couldn't sleep. You bet your ass I hauled myself out of bed and dragged my ass to the hospital at 8:30am sharp! I couldn't walk faster than a shuffle, so it took me like half-an-hour (thank god it's so close by).
Finally got it, but then I had to deal with....the waiting. Yes, apparently follow-up patients have appointments, so they get in first...which is understandable I suppose (I've become one, myself), but not when you're hurting the way I was. The whole time I had nightmares of the doctor saying "Hmmm...well, it looks like hemorrhoids...why don't we just let it run its course?" Or "Maybe it will go away on its own if you change your diet..." Or worse: "we don't really deal with that sort of problem...here's the address of a specialist clinic you can go to tomorrow..." ...or some such bullshit (I don't have a lot of faith in the Japanese medical system).
But! I finally got in to see the doctor, and after describing my symptoms he right away said "It sounds like an abscess." Which is what i'd suspected, anyway. So...he drained it right there in the office... All told it was probably a really simple operation...but it fucking HURT!
The people waiting outside got a nice symphony of my screaming and whimpering... Cuz first he had to examine the abscess (ow) then clean it to prepare for local anesthetic (ow), then actually inject the local anesthetic (OW), then pull the syringe back out (MOTHERFUCKING OW OW OW)... And so forth. I could still feel a bit of pain from the incision, and also when he pressed the wound to squeeze out the pus (hey I warned you this was TMI, right?).
When it was all done he got me all cleaned and gauzed up, and while there's still some pain from the incision I'm feeling MUCH better. I got 2 weeks off from work, which I don't think I'll be needing in its entirety, but I'm definitely enjoying the downtime. It still blows my mind how suddenly this developed, so can I just caution everyone else: if you even suspect it's an abscess, for godssake get it checked out!! I went from "sore" to "bedridden" in 5 days...I think if I'd had to wait one more day I would've lost my mind.
So...guess who learned how to say "anal abscess" in Japanese, today?
Yes, that's right. I developed an abscess on my butt...well...in my butt...well...you know...right around....that area. At first I thought it was a wicked case of the 'rhoids, but the increasing pain made it apparent that this was something worse.
It started last Wednesday as a little bit of nothing...by Friday it hurt significantly but I was still walking about...then by Saturday afternoon I was canceling plans and staying in bed...by Sunday I could NOT get out of bed! It's really quite scary how quickly it progressed. By Sunday the pain was so bad that every little cough, laugh, sneeze, clench, whatever....produced cries of pain. Same for rolling over, standing up, etc...sitting down was absolutely out of the question, as was using the toilet (not that I had to; by then I'd completely lost my appetite and had stopped eating entirely).
Believe me, I would've gone to the doctor on Friday, but...THE HOSPITAL ONLY ACCEPTS PATIENTS FROM 8:30am-!!:00pm. Unless you're an emergency case, which...I suppose I wasn't. So yeah, I had work on Friday. But Ted, why didn't you just go on Saturday? BECAUSE THE HOSPITAL IS CLOSED OVER THE WEEKEND. Lord.
So I spent Sunday evening tossing and turning and crying out, literally watching the clock and counting the minutes because I couldn't sleep. You bet your ass I hauled myself out of bed and dragged my ass to the hospital at 8:30am sharp! I couldn't walk faster than a shuffle, so it took me like half-an-hour (thank god it's so close by).
Finally got it, but then I had to deal with....the waiting. Yes, apparently follow-up patients have appointments, so they get in first...which is understandable I suppose (I've become one, myself), but not when you're hurting the way I was. The whole time I had nightmares of the doctor saying "Hmmm...well, it looks like hemorrhoids...why don't we just let it run its course?" Or "Maybe it will go away on its own if you change your diet..." Or worse: "we don't really deal with that sort of problem...here's the address of a specialist clinic you can go to tomorrow..." ...or some such bullshit (I don't have a lot of faith in the Japanese medical system).
But! I finally got in to see the doctor, and after describing my symptoms he right away said "It sounds like an abscess." Which is what i'd suspected, anyway. So...he drained it right there in the office... All told it was probably a really simple operation...but it fucking HURT!
The people waiting outside got a nice symphony of my screaming and whimpering... Cuz first he had to examine the abscess (ow) then clean it to prepare for local anesthetic (ow), then actually inject the local anesthetic (OW), then pull the syringe back out (MOTHERFUCKING OW OW OW)... And so forth. I could still feel a bit of pain from the incision, and also when he pressed the wound to squeeze out the pus (hey I warned you this was TMI, right?).
When it was all done he got me all cleaned and gauzed up, and while there's still some pain from the incision I'm feeling MUCH better. I got 2 weeks off from work, which I don't think I'll be needing in its entirety, but I'm definitely enjoying the downtime. It still blows my mind how suddenly this developed, so can I just caution everyone else: if you even suspect it's an abscess, for godssake get it checked out!! I went from "sore" to "bedridden" in 5 days...I think if I'd had to wait one more day I would've lost my mind.