Fic: All the Truth Unwinding (Ray, Waycest, PG)
Title: All the Truth Unwinding
Summary: Ray couldn’t help but notice that Mikey and Gerard were acting strangely.
Characters: Ray Toro, Mikey/Gerard
Rating: PG
Word count: 1680
AN: For fallingfortruth, for the prompt here. Thanks to chmclfairytales for making this better. :D
The first time Ray noticed something was off was in the middle of a show.
Gerard approached Mikey, who backpedaled, looking almost frantic. Gerard shrugged and turned back to the audience as Mikey tripped. Fell.
Ray watched them out of the corner of his eye, as Frank skidded to a stop, whispering something to Mikey that made him laugh even as he floundered on the floor.
Gerard joined them, and Mikey stiffened before pushing himself up, climbing awkwardly to his feet as Gerard finished singing the song.
Backstage, Mikey laughed it off. “I thought Gerard was going to try something again,” he said, voice shaking just a little. It was barely noticable.
Ray knew Gerard well enough to see the hurt expression cross his face lightning-fast before he pushed Mikey’s shoulder playfully and said, “Like I’d want to.”
“Break it up, boys,” Bob said cheerfully as he pushed past them both on his way to the dressing room.
“Yeah, don’t go breaking your brother’s heart,” Frank laughed. Ray followed behind them, and saw the hurt look Gerard shot Mikey.
Something had changed, something important. Ray had no idea what - their lives all appeared the same as they had a week before, though with the Ways that was no indication of whether or not something catastrophic had occurred - but whatever it was, it was driving a wedge between them.
Mikey hunched his shoulders in and didn’t say a word.
*
Late one night, when Ray should have been asleep but instead was laying in his bunk mentally playing through the new melody he was working on, trying to work out the awkward notes, he heard the tell-tale thump of someone climbing out of their bunk.
He turned on his side, glancing through his slightly open curtain to see Gerard standing in the aisle, awkwardly staring at Mikey’s closed curtain.
Ray was about to tell Gerard to go back to bed when Gerard knocked on Mikey’s curtain.
That was unprecedented. Gerard and Mikey barged into each others’ space freely. Even when the girls were there, they didn’t knock.
Ray had known the Ways forever, it felt like. Certainly sometimes it didn’t seem like he’d done anything worth remembering before he’d fallen into their lives.
He’d never really been jealous of their closeness - it was just who they were. They were Gerard and Mikey, and there was no sense pretending they weren’t the most important person to each other, so it was easy enough to settle in as their friend and bandmate, comfortable in the closeness of the relationship he had with them.
Now he wondered what he had missed, because there was something strange happening. He watched the curtain slowly slide open, and thought that he probably shouldn’t be watching. There was a tension in the air that kept him from saying anything, but he could turn over, stuff in his earphones.
He could do any number of things, but instead he kept watching through the gap, straining to hear what they would say.
He was just being cautious. He remembered all those times when keeping silent had only kept the rest of them in the dark while one of them suffered in silence, and he didn’t want to go through that again.
Mikey spoke first. “What do you want?” His voice was flat and studiously uninterested.
“Mikey,” Gerard said, in that tone he reserved for his brother. The whiney, hopeful one that meant he was begging forgiveness.
Ray wondered again what had happened. They’d been off, yeah, but there hadn’t been any yelling or fussing or even snippy comments. Just... unreadable looks and awkward moments.
“Go ‘way,” Mikey mumbled.
“Do you really want to have this discussion here?” Gerard said, motioning around the bus.
“I don’t want to have it at all.”
“But... I miss you,” Gerard said, sounding so broken Ray fought the urge to leap out of his bunk and give him a bearhug.
“It’s all fucked up,” Mikey replied. Ray couldn’t see his face from this angle.“We fucked it up.”
Gerard leaned in, said something Ray couldn’t make out. Ray clenched at his pillow, eyes glued to the sight of Gerard’s hunched back.
A few long minutes, and Ray could tell from Gerard’s expression that Mikey hadn’t forgiven him. That they hadn’t forgiven each other, for whatever it was that was driving a wedge between them.
“I didn’t think it would change things this much,” Gerard said quietly.
“It did,” Mikey replied, voice sharp in the darkness. “I didn’t want it to, either, but...”
“I love you,” Gerard said.
“I love you too,” Mikey said, the words soft as he pulled his curtain closed.
He shouldn’t have eavesdropped, Ray realized belatedly, turning over and trying to forget the way Gerard’s shoulders had hunched after Mikey shut the curtain.
Just like Mikey’s earlier.
*
Ray started trying to figure out what had gone awry between the brothers after that. He watched them carefully, as carefully as he had during the bad times, and he still couldn’t quite put together what he saw.
They were still speaking. Ray had heard spirited arguments between them about everything from artificial strawberry flavoring to Magneto’s fathering abilities, though the latter argument cut off abruptly after Mikey said, “Yeah, but look at Wanda and Pietro...”
When they piled up on couches for interviews or watching movies, Ray noticed that they never sat side-by-side - Gerard was practically using Frank as a shield between them, half the time. When they were close, they kept a careful distance that Ray had never seen them do before, even when they were just starting out and people tended to make comments in their direction when they saw them tangled together.
They were acting like ex-lovers, Ray thought, and then couldn’t dislodge the thought from his head.
*
Finally Ray decided that he had to talk to one of them, because he couldn’t stand to see them so broken anymore.
It wasn’t even about the well-being of the band, not after everything they’d gone through. It was about Gerard and Mikey, who he loved like brothers and who he couldn’t stand to see hurting like this, especially when trying to keep it a secret, which he knew would only lead to even worse things.
He debated who to approach - he loved them both, but finally decided on Mikey, who was the more stubborn of the two.
It took a little while to corner Mikey, who was the second-stealthiest member of the band, but finally Ray managed it.
Of course, when he did, he had no real idea what to say. Finally he said, “What’s up?”
“Nothing?” Mikey said, looking around as though he was expecting a tub of goo to be dumped on him at any moment.
“I’m worried about you,” Ray said in a rush, forgoing segues.
“I’m fine,” Mikey said. “A bit worried about you, now, but...”
“About you and Gerard,” Ray clarified.
Mikey kind of froze, like a deer in headlights.
“You two haven’t been... you’re off, lately,” he continued. “Like you’re...”
He couldn’t bring himself to tell Mikey that it felt like a messy breakup was happening under their noses.
“We’re the same as we ever were,” Mikey said stoutly.
“No, you’re not,” Ray argued. “And I can’t fucking stand to see you two like this.”
“Did you say something to Frank? Or Bob?” Mikey said suspiciously.
“What? No,” Ray said.
“Because they both tried to say the same thing to me, about how me and Gerard are probably just on each other’s nerves but to get over it already,” Mikey said. Ray couldn’t fail to notice how Mikey had taken the offense, like he was going to deflect the questioning.
There was really only one thing Ray could do. “I don’t know exactly what happened, but it feels like you two are, well. Breaking up.”
Mikey got kind of pale, and Ray knew.
“And... and you know we love you both,” Ray said, because he couldn’t let Mikey think he would let anything come between their friendship. “But whatever it is, it’s fucking stupid, okay? You and Gerard just are, and you can’t fuck that up. Not with anything.”
Ray really hoped so, anyway.
“Things are just different,” Mikey mumbled.
“Things change,” Ray agreed. “But... you just can’t let it drive a wedge between you, okay? No matter how hard it is to get back to where you want to be. You just have to work at it.”
Mikey kind of nodded, then said, “Thanks, Ray.”
Ray swept him up in a hug. “I just want you two fixed, okay?”
He could feel rather than see Mikey’s nod, and he hoped that it would be enough.
*
A week later, Gerard gave him a hug for no apparent reason.
Ray didn’t mind. He’d been keeping an eye on Gerard and Mikey when he wasn’t busy or holed up in the bus’ studio, but he couldn’t gauge whether or not things were less tense.
He’d maybe been purposefully busy, if he was honest with himself, so that he didn’t have to think too much about the implications of his conversation with Mikey. (It seemed like something that should bother him more, but on the other hand, it was Mikey and Gerard, and everything about them was strange.)
Gerard didn’t explain the hug, and instead began to talk about his comic book and a plot twist he’d just thought up - the characters had been slowly falling in love all their lives, you see, it was just the rumor that proved to be a catalyst, and it didn’t matter how the relationship developed because they had each other - and Ray smiled and nodded and played him a new melody.
He thought about asking Frank or Bob what they thought, to see if maybe he wasn’t alone, but in the end decided not to. Judging from the way Mikey mentioned their attempts at fixing things, they both knew, and accepted it the same way he did, as just another odd part of their lives.
Some things were best left unsaid.
Summary: Ray couldn’t help but notice that Mikey and Gerard were acting strangely.
Characters: Ray Toro, Mikey/Gerard
Rating: PG
Word count: 1680
AN: For fallingfortruth, for the prompt here. Thanks to chmclfairytales for making this better. :D
The first time Ray noticed something was off was in the middle of a show.
Gerard approached Mikey, who backpedaled, looking almost frantic. Gerard shrugged and turned back to the audience as Mikey tripped. Fell.
Ray watched them out of the corner of his eye, as Frank skidded to a stop, whispering something to Mikey that made him laugh even as he floundered on the floor.
Gerard joined them, and Mikey stiffened before pushing himself up, climbing awkwardly to his feet as Gerard finished singing the song.
Backstage, Mikey laughed it off. “I thought Gerard was going to try something again,” he said, voice shaking just a little. It was barely noticable.
Ray knew Gerard well enough to see the hurt expression cross his face lightning-fast before he pushed Mikey’s shoulder playfully and said, “Like I’d want to.”
“Break it up, boys,” Bob said cheerfully as he pushed past them both on his way to the dressing room.
“Yeah, don’t go breaking your brother’s heart,” Frank laughed. Ray followed behind them, and saw the hurt look Gerard shot Mikey.
Something had changed, something important. Ray had no idea what - their lives all appeared the same as they had a week before, though with the Ways that was no indication of whether or not something catastrophic had occurred - but whatever it was, it was driving a wedge between them.
Mikey hunched his shoulders in and didn’t say a word.
*
Late one night, when Ray should have been asleep but instead was laying in his bunk mentally playing through the new melody he was working on, trying to work out the awkward notes, he heard the tell-tale thump of someone climbing out of their bunk.
He turned on his side, glancing through his slightly open curtain to see Gerard standing in the aisle, awkwardly staring at Mikey’s closed curtain.
Ray was about to tell Gerard to go back to bed when Gerard knocked on Mikey’s curtain.
That was unprecedented. Gerard and Mikey barged into each others’ space freely. Even when the girls were there, they didn’t knock.
Ray had known the Ways forever, it felt like. Certainly sometimes it didn’t seem like he’d done anything worth remembering before he’d fallen into their lives.
He’d never really been jealous of their closeness - it was just who they were. They were Gerard and Mikey, and there was no sense pretending they weren’t the most important person to each other, so it was easy enough to settle in as their friend and bandmate, comfortable in the closeness of the relationship he had with them.
Now he wondered what he had missed, because there was something strange happening. He watched the curtain slowly slide open, and thought that he probably shouldn’t be watching. There was a tension in the air that kept him from saying anything, but he could turn over, stuff in his earphones.
He could do any number of things, but instead he kept watching through the gap, straining to hear what they would say.
He was just being cautious. He remembered all those times when keeping silent had only kept the rest of them in the dark while one of them suffered in silence, and he didn’t want to go through that again.
Mikey spoke first. “What do you want?” His voice was flat and studiously uninterested.
“Mikey,” Gerard said, in that tone he reserved for his brother. The whiney, hopeful one that meant he was begging forgiveness.
Ray wondered again what had happened. They’d been off, yeah, but there hadn’t been any yelling or fussing or even snippy comments. Just... unreadable looks and awkward moments.
“Go ‘way,” Mikey mumbled.
“Do you really want to have this discussion here?” Gerard said, motioning around the bus.
“I don’t want to have it at all.”
“But... I miss you,” Gerard said, sounding so broken Ray fought the urge to leap out of his bunk and give him a bearhug.
“It’s all fucked up,” Mikey replied. Ray couldn’t see his face from this angle.“We fucked it up.”
Gerard leaned in, said something Ray couldn’t make out. Ray clenched at his pillow, eyes glued to the sight of Gerard’s hunched back.
A few long minutes, and Ray could tell from Gerard’s expression that Mikey hadn’t forgiven him. That they hadn’t forgiven each other, for whatever it was that was driving a wedge between them.
“I didn’t think it would change things this much,” Gerard said quietly.
“It did,” Mikey replied, voice sharp in the darkness. “I didn’t want it to, either, but...”
“I love you,” Gerard said.
“I love you too,” Mikey said, the words soft as he pulled his curtain closed.
He shouldn’t have eavesdropped, Ray realized belatedly, turning over and trying to forget the way Gerard’s shoulders had hunched after Mikey shut the curtain.
Just like Mikey’s earlier.
*
Ray started trying to figure out what had gone awry between the brothers after that. He watched them carefully, as carefully as he had during the bad times, and he still couldn’t quite put together what he saw.
They were still speaking. Ray had heard spirited arguments between them about everything from artificial strawberry flavoring to Magneto’s fathering abilities, though the latter argument cut off abruptly after Mikey said, “Yeah, but look at Wanda and Pietro...”
When they piled up on couches for interviews or watching movies, Ray noticed that they never sat side-by-side - Gerard was practically using Frank as a shield between them, half the time. When they were close, they kept a careful distance that Ray had never seen them do before, even when they were just starting out and people tended to make comments in their direction when they saw them tangled together.
They were acting like ex-lovers, Ray thought, and then couldn’t dislodge the thought from his head.
*
Finally Ray decided that he had to talk to one of them, because he couldn’t stand to see them so broken anymore.
It wasn’t even about the well-being of the band, not after everything they’d gone through. It was about Gerard and Mikey, who he loved like brothers and who he couldn’t stand to see hurting like this, especially when trying to keep it a secret, which he knew would only lead to even worse things.
He debated who to approach - he loved them both, but finally decided on Mikey, who was the more stubborn of the two.
It took a little while to corner Mikey, who was the second-stealthiest member of the band, but finally Ray managed it.
Of course, when he did, he had no real idea what to say. Finally he said, “What’s up?”
“Nothing?” Mikey said, looking around as though he was expecting a tub of goo to be dumped on him at any moment.
“I’m worried about you,” Ray said in a rush, forgoing segues.
“I’m fine,” Mikey said. “A bit worried about you, now, but...”
“About you and Gerard,” Ray clarified.
Mikey kind of froze, like a deer in headlights.
“You two haven’t been... you’re off, lately,” he continued. “Like you’re...”
He couldn’t bring himself to tell Mikey that it felt like a messy breakup was happening under their noses.
“We’re the same as we ever were,” Mikey said stoutly.
“No, you’re not,” Ray argued. “And I can’t fucking stand to see you two like this.”
“Did you say something to Frank? Or Bob?” Mikey said suspiciously.
“What? No,” Ray said.
“Because they both tried to say the same thing to me, about how me and Gerard are probably just on each other’s nerves but to get over it already,” Mikey said. Ray couldn’t fail to notice how Mikey had taken the offense, like he was going to deflect the questioning.
There was really only one thing Ray could do. “I don’t know exactly what happened, but it feels like you two are, well. Breaking up.”
Mikey got kind of pale, and Ray knew.
“And... and you know we love you both,” Ray said, because he couldn’t let Mikey think he would let anything come between their friendship. “But whatever it is, it’s fucking stupid, okay? You and Gerard just are, and you can’t fuck that up. Not with anything.”
Ray really hoped so, anyway.
“Things are just different,” Mikey mumbled.
“Things change,” Ray agreed. “But... you just can’t let it drive a wedge between you, okay? No matter how hard it is to get back to where you want to be. You just have to work at it.”
Mikey kind of nodded, then said, “Thanks, Ray.”
Ray swept him up in a hug. “I just want you two fixed, okay?”
He could feel rather than see Mikey’s nod, and he hoped that it would be enough.
*
A week later, Gerard gave him a hug for no apparent reason.
Ray didn’t mind. He’d been keeping an eye on Gerard and Mikey when he wasn’t busy or holed up in the bus’ studio, but he couldn’t gauge whether or not things were less tense.
He’d maybe been purposefully busy, if he was honest with himself, so that he didn’t have to think too much about the implications of his conversation with Mikey. (It seemed like something that should bother him more, but on the other hand, it was Mikey and Gerard, and everything about them was strange.)
Gerard didn’t explain the hug, and instead began to talk about his comic book and a plot twist he’d just thought up - the characters had been slowly falling in love all their lives, you see, it was just the rumor that proved to be a catalyst, and it didn’t matter how the relationship developed because they had each other - and Ray smiled and nodded and played him a new melody.
He thought about asking Frank or Bob what they thought, to see if maybe he wasn’t alone, but in the end decided not to. Judging from the way Mikey mentioned their attempts at fixing things, they both knew, and accepted it the same way he did, as just another odd part of their lives.
Some things were best left unsaid.