You Promised...
Summary: Church finally keeps his promise from Season 4.
Church continued to read the papers in front of him, not looking up. He hoped that maybe if he didn't make eye contact, the other would go away.
Caboose edged closer.
Church scooted his chair away.
Caboose edged in closer again. "Church?"
Church scooted away again. "What?"
Caboose gave him his best wounded puppy look.
Church finally looked up. He gave a frustrated sigh, raking his fingers through his hair, then forced a calm voice through clenched teeth. "What do you what, Caboose?"
Caboose brought his hands out from behind his back and sheepishly held up a book. "You promised."
A moment of confusion flitted across his face when he looked at the title. "Caboose? What is that?"
"You said we would read it together later, remember?"
Church looked back at the title, and groaned. He had hoped Caboose had forgotten. In fact, he had forgotten. How long ago had that been? A month at least. After all that had happened, Tex leaving, the ship blowing up, Tucker taking off, how was he supposed to have remembered such a stupid thing as this? He put the papers down and waved the private over, taking the book and placing it on the table. "Caboose, I'm busy. I-"
"I made popcorn!" he announced happily.
"Caboose, I'm-"
"And I have my story-time blanket already."
He sighed and looked back at what he had been working on. 'Oh well, papers can wait a little longer, I suppose.' He took the book over to the couch, followed by Caboose trailing his blanket and clutching a bowl of popcorn. He resisted a snarl as Caboose clumsily climbed up beside him. Church waited as Caboose fussed, trying to get comfortable. He succeeded in making Church about as uncomfortable as possible, and when Caboose finally got settled, Church quickly undid his efforts by moving to the other end of the couch.
After much pouting, sighing, frustration and maneuvering, they finally managed to settle on a position where Caboose got to rest his head against Church's chest, Church rested his arm over Caboose's shoulder to prop up the book, and the bowl of popcorn was nestled in Caboose's lap where they could both get at it.
"I couldn't find one with pictures," Caboose said as Church finally cracked open the book.
"Probably for the best," Church muttered, knowing exactly what those kinds of pictures would likely do to Caboose. Not that Church really thought Caboose could be scarred any worse than he was, but why risk it?
"Will you do voices?"
"It's not that kind of book, Caboose."
"Oh." Caboose fell quiet, but for the munching of the popcorn.
Church cleared his throat and began to read. "The Human Reproductive Cycle."
It was slow going. Caboose constantly interrupting, Church getting angry and threatening to stop reading, Caboose swearing he would be quiet, Church having to stop and look up irritatingly large words in the dictionary...
Two hours later, Church put the book on the side table and glanced down at Caboose, sound asleep on his lap. He sighed. Sure, Caboose drove him bat-shit crazy but still, somewhere deep inside, Church couldn't help but care for him. Caboose had become like a kid brother. A very stupid, very annoying kid brother. Ok, more like a very stupid dog with blind loyalty who was prone to piddling on the carpet if he got too excited, but he had somehow wormed his way into Church's world in a ways he didn't like to admit.
And now it was going to end. Church realized that explaining where babies come from to Caboose had been an infinitely easier task than trying to explain why their relocation orders were not sending them to the same place was going to be. Church had had a couple of days to adjust to the idea already, but he knew it would be harder for Caboose to understand. Maybe if he made a game out of it, it would ease the shock? He sighed again and brushed his hand absent-mindedly along Caboose's hair.
It pained him that he could never do anything about his feelings. He knew taking advantage of the kid was wrong in about eight different ways, and maybe that was why he always kept him at arm's length. He was afraid of letting him get too close. He was afraid of damaging further what was already so very broken. He wondered how spouses who found themselves suddenly married to mental retardation patients through no fault of their own ever managed to get by.
Gently easing his way out from beneath the sleeping blue, he knelt down beside him and just watched him sleep for a minute. He reached out and brushed a bit of hair back from his eyes, letting his fingers trace down his cheek. Deep down, he hoped he would never have to see Caboose again. Just put it all behind him, move on, let go and not look back.
A bit deeper down, however, he knew he'd never forget him. He pressed his lips to the shaggy blond head, pulling back to quickly wipe at a tear that had snuck out. Then he left to pack before he made any more mistakes.
Church continued to read the papers in front of him, not looking up. He hoped that maybe if he didn't make eye contact, the other would go away.
Caboose edged closer.
Church scooted his chair away.
Caboose edged in closer again. "Church?"
Church scooted away again. "What?"
Caboose gave him his best wounded puppy look.
Church finally looked up. He gave a frustrated sigh, raking his fingers through his hair, then forced a calm voice through clenched teeth. "What do you what, Caboose?"
Caboose brought his hands out from behind his back and sheepishly held up a book. "You promised."
A moment of confusion flitted across his face when he looked at the title. "Caboose? What is that?"
"You said we would read it together later, remember?"
Church looked back at the title, and groaned. He had hoped Caboose had forgotten. In fact, he had forgotten. How long ago had that been? A month at least. After all that had happened, Tex leaving, the ship blowing up, Tucker taking off, how was he supposed to have remembered such a stupid thing as this? He put the papers down and waved the private over, taking the book and placing it on the table. "Caboose, I'm busy. I-"
"I made popcorn!" he announced happily.
"Caboose, I'm-"
"And I have my story-time blanket already."
He sighed and looked back at what he had been working on. 'Oh well, papers can wait a little longer, I suppose.' He took the book over to the couch, followed by Caboose trailing his blanket and clutching a bowl of popcorn. He resisted a snarl as Caboose clumsily climbed up beside him. Church waited as Caboose fussed, trying to get comfortable. He succeeded in making Church about as uncomfortable as possible, and when Caboose finally got settled, Church quickly undid his efforts by moving to the other end of the couch.
After much pouting, sighing, frustration and maneuvering, they finally managed to settle on a position where Caboose got to rest his head against Church's chest, Church rested his arm over Caboose's shoulder to prop up the book, and the bowl of popcorn was nestled in Caboose's lap where they could both get at it.
"I couldn't find one with pictures," Caboose said as Church finally cracked open the book.
"Probably for the best," Church muttered, knowing exactly what those kinds of pictures would likely do to Caboose. Not that Church really thought Caboose could be scarred any worse than he was, but why risk it?
"Will you do voices?"
"It's not that kind of book, Caboose."
"Oh." Caboose fell quiet, but for the munching of the popcorn.
Church cleared his throat and began to read. "The Human Reproductive Cycle."
It was slow going. Caboose constantly interrupting, Church getting angry and threatening to stop reading, Caboose swearing he would be quiet, Church having to stop and look up irritatingly large words in the dictionary...
Two hours later, Church put the book on the side table and glanced down at Caboose, sound asleep on his lap. He sighed. Sure, Caboose drove him bat-shit crazy but still, somewhere deep inside, Church couldn't help but care for him. Caboose had become like a kid brother. A very stupid, very annoying kid brother. Ok, more like a very stupid dog with blind loyalty who was prone to piddling on the carpet if he got too excited, but he had somehow wormed his way into Church's world in a ways he didn't like to admit.
And now it was going to end. Church realized that explaining where babies come from to Caboose had been an infinitely easier task than trying to explain why their relocation orders were not sending them to the same place was going to be. Church had had a couple of days to adjust to the idea already, but he knew it would be harder for Caboose to understand. Maybe if he made a game out of it, it would ease the shock? He sighed again and brushed his hand absent-mindedly along Caboose's hair.
It pained him that he could never do anything about his feelings. He knew taking advantage of the kid was wrong in about eight different ways, and maybe that was why he always kept him at arm's length. He was afraid of letting him get too close. He was afraid of damaging further what was already so very broken. He wondered how spouses who found themselves suddenly married to mental retardation patients through no fault of their own ever managed to get by.
Gently easing his way out from beneath the sleeping blue, he knelt down beside him and just watched him sleep for a minute. He reached out and brushed a bit of hair back from his eyes, letting his fingers trace down his cheek. Deep down, he hoped he would never have to see Caboose again. Just put it all behind him, move on, let go and not look back.
A bit deeper down, however, he knew he'd never forget him. He pressed his lips to the shaggy blond head, pulling back to quickly wipe at a tear that had snuck out. Then he left to pack before he made any more mistakes.