Pondering it all

[nonbiomum]

In a week or so's time, this journal will be four years old. I always hoped that one day I'd be able to write the kind of entries I can write now, talking about our child, and how much they enrich our lives. It's true, Ember is more fabulous than we could ever have hoped, but when I think of writing in this journal, I find other thoughts come to

Comments

[alexisyael]

That was lovely!

[rosypie]

haven't checked in here for ages. love the post, can't believe how far back the journal goes. I re-read mine and it seems so long ago.

anyway, what you say in you post about bio/nonbio not mattering, this is exactly how we felt when jude arrived. the plan in pencil had always been that perhaps eve would have our second child, or third. we realised very quickly that it really didn't matter, especially when the breastfeeding stopped. having done it, i can say it's true that ttc detracts somewhat from your relationship with your existing child. actually for us, not so much the ttc process but the pregnancy itself. it's knackering no matter how ace you are at being pregnant and you are unable to give parenting 100%. Nine months is a long stretch when you're a toddler.

of course having that second child is wonderous when it happens, just as much as the first. having (and not having) a third child is something i think about a lot.