Judge Not, You Horrible Bastards

[noradre]

Bloke turned up at the A&E when I was there with mum the other week, pissed out of his head and looking like he spent most of his time that way. He vomited on the floor just as I walked past on my way outside for a fag. Later he was in the main casualty waiting room making some incredible retching noises and driving people out of the room into the

Comments

[noradre]

This might sound like "It's not you, it's those *other* people" but I never find you judgemental, always think of you as one of the more easy-going people I know if anything. It is something we all do though so, yeah, it doesn't hurt to realise it and try to do it less.

Thing that really bothered me a lot about the bloke at the hospital is that alcohol is a well-known way of self-medicating and I wondered if somewhere inside that pretty horrible exterior was a voice crying for help but just not knowing how to articulate the plea.

Sorry to hear about Joe, if I can help at all let me know, my email's on my profile if you'd rather talk that way. Not sure if I can offer any words of wisdom - I look back on my childhood and although some of it was definitely inherited I think a lot of it was caused by three pretty traumatic incidents when I was quite young - but if there's anything you want to ask I'll gladly help if I can.

[noradre]

My dad was the same, not to the point of alcoholism but he was a shy man who drank to give himself confidence and he never seemed to move beyond that. I definitely got the shy 'gene' from both parents, although I think it was the permanent sense of insecurity in our circumstances that really affected me, it's very hard to have confidence when you're so aware of how precarious everything is.

I think all you can do as a parent is try to give Joe a sense of security and love, let him know you'll always be there for him, sounds like a cliche but I think it makes a tremendous difference to a child to really feel that.