Contrary to popular belief, cowbell is not in fact the only prescription for a fever. It actually just gives you a headache.

How come you never see men working as psychic readers?

Jam, I guess I do look like the Rock.


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In this week's installment of Dave's Life Lessons Learned the Hard Way:

No matter how drunk you are, finding yourself in the passenger seat of a car driven by a girl you met just an hour earlier who subsequently turns out to be even more drunk - and also batshit insane - will sober you up immediately.

Stay tuned for next week's episode, The ( Read more... )

Never would I have imagined that I'd ever celebrate my birthday in Oklahoma.

Only in the army would a grilled cheese sandwich be considered meat.

As I left my apartment earlier this afternoon I saw a plastic bag floating in the breeze. It was not nearly as epic as that movie led me to believe.

I don't think I've quite come to terms with the fact that I'm living in Oklahoma and will be doing so until April.

Casey: Every once and a while, gay pop songs get stuck in my head
Me: like what?
Casey: Lovefool - The Cardigans.
Me: haha, I like that song
Me: love me love me, say that you'll love me!
Me: ....fuck