it's a possibility to live without

[nostrils]

on the verge of tears again. couldn't really explain why. i really think i may seek help from someone. maybe even check into a psychiatric hospital. i don't think many people would try to disuade me.

i can't do it alone. never have i felt so alone. isn't this what i wanted? drugs were my boyfriend. drugs were my friends.

drugs are the reasons i have

Comments

[strangeraeons]

Keep in mind that your mind is nothing but an input/output system. Just like a computer. I, like you, am guilty of not knowing when to stop. I've never let myself get into pharmaceuticals, but that's because I knew how addicted I would become. I've let myself become quite the alcoholic though, and now being 21 it's always there. Even when I don't feel like drinking, there's always that little voice in the back of my head that wants this modest altering of consciousness, since I try not to smoke pot as much anymore

[ninascatharsis]

There are other options out there that exist and forms of support for you that you don't even realize. Try going to one meeting of Alcholics (or Narcotics) Anonymous. There are meetings everyday, everywhere, because not only are many people feeling as helpless as you are, but these programs have helped numerous people get and stay sober for the past 70 years. Wouldn't hurt to try...

[strangeraeons]

You still check this, Neen?

[atomicwhisper]

It might be good if you just decide you want to talk to someone, not necessarily check into rehab or something. Like maybe a mental health clinic? I'm not saying you're crazy or anything! Just that it might help to talk to someone who has seen other people go through what you are currently going through. But, if you think that rehab is the way you need to go, then go for it. I mean, look at Carolyn. I am not sure how she did it (she did move to California so that probably helped to get her away from everything) but she's in a really good place now.

[submarginal]

you don't know me, and I don't know you, but I read this, and I have been where you are
tomorrow will come whether you like it or not and it will hopefully get better
just keep pushing on...

[listlesss]

add me back betch. <3