[JE] In-duck-tion
Title: In-duck-tion
Fandom: KAT-TUN
Pairing: Kame/Jin
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 2,000
Disclaimer: Not mine, damnit
Summary: Kame and Jin (and Elmo!) attempt to go to the movies.
A/N: If this seems weird it's because it's a birthday giftfic for the wonderful mnemonic_psych, and I've tried to incorporate some of the things I associate with her. Happy Birthday, Moni! Please excuse the odd timeline.
In-duck-tion
"Do you think we lost them?"
Kame peers out from behind a rack of glittering black cardigans. "I hope so. Next time you decide you want to go on an afternoon date, how about we try a place no one will recognise us, instead of Roppongi Hills?"
Jin shakes his head. "We'd have to leave the country for that, and even then it's not guaranteed. You should've seen the girls trying to stalk me in America."
"I'm surprised you managed to make it through the shop door with such a swelled head."
"What's your problem, huh? At least you managed to get a birthday present for your niece; it's not like this afternoon's been all bad."
"Those crazy fangirls broke the box, though." Kame looks ruefully at the remains of the oversized Elmo doll in his arms. "He's a bit battered. I might have to buy her another one."
"So we'll just jazz him up a little." Jin looks around at the accessories till he finds the perfect hat, and settles the skull-print black fedora on Elmo's head. It just fits. "See? Now he really looks like one of the family."
Sometimes, Kame thinks, Jin has good ideas. Like when they're in a restaurant and Kame's a little tipsy, and Jin suggests skipping dessert and going straight home so they can have their fun before Kame's too drunk to rise to the occasion. Or when Yamapi was feeling down about failing to graduate and Jin suggested a trip to Disney to cheer him up.
Donning disguises of their own in order to avoid rabid fangirls, however, is not one of Jin's better ideas. Not when he decides they'll never be recognised if they dress up as ducks.
"I'm not doing it," Kame says flatly, looking at the downy yellow duck hoodies with barely-concealed disgust. "I'll get fluff all over my shirt."
"It's a shiny purple shirt with sequins and flowers and stuff all over it - it can't look any stranger," Jin points out. "You're already dressing like a teenage girl, so how about dressing like an elementary school boy? Nobody's going to believe THE Kamenashi would ever wear a beak on his head."
Kame thinks back to old Ya-Ya-Yah episodes; he's not so sure about that. "At least I don't show up to collect awards looking like I just stepped out of the shower and threw on the first thing I found on my floor. Besides, everyone's used to seeing you in a yellow animal hoodie."
"Hey!" There are some things Jin cannot let pass. "Don't knock Pikachu."
"Pika pika," Kame says right before he dumps the hoodie on Jin's head.
-----
Ten minutes later, heavily disguised as fashionable young ducks about town, Kame, Jin, and a fedora-wearing Elmo make their way underneath the giant spider towards the cinema. They're not the only oddly dressed people in the area, however.
"Those guys look creepy." Jin shudders as another group of people in black and white robes stride past them, some waving enormous artificial swords. "I wonder why there so many cosplayers around today?"
The first thing they see when they reach the top of the stairs is a poster for a Bleach movie.
"I'm guessing that has something to do with it," Kame says as they walk through the doors. "Come on, let's get in the queue behind Aizen."
"Do you think that's safe?"
Kame flexes a decidedly un-ducklike bicep. "I can take him, unless his bankai involves rollercoasters. Then you're on your own."
"If it's rollercoasters, I'll handle it," Jin says, sounding ridiculously gallant for someone wearing oversized sunglasses and a duck's bill on his head. "I'll protect you, like Mildmay protects Felix."
"Mildmay?" The name acquires a couple of extra syllables when Kame says it. "Is this another one of your weird American shows?"
"Not a TV show," Jin explains. "I'm reading some books to practise my English, and a friend suggested these fantasy novels. Felix is this crazy redhaired wizard with all these rings and tattoos, and then Mildmay's his half-brother and he's a cat burglar, except they don't know they're related at first and-"
"It sounds fascinating," Kame says, hating to interrupt Jin when he's so enthusiastic about something. "But we're almost at the front of the queue and we still haven't decided what we're seeing."
The cinema was sort of an unfinished plan, concocted over Starbucks right before the fans found them, and they hadn't had a chance to discuss their viewing options. Jin had barely had time to finish his drink.
"How about Inception?" Jin suggests. "I hear it's pretty good."
"But it doesn't have Johnny Depp." Kame points at a poster down the far end of the box office. "That one does."
"It's got Leonardo DiCaprio?" Jin tries. "You thought he was good in Titanic, remember."
What Kame remembers the most about Titanic is a Wink Up photoshoot where they'd all taken turns pretending to be Jack and Rose, and somehow the shot of Jin-as-Rose with Nakamaru-as-Jack had made it into the magazine. Kame would've preferred the one where he was Jack, but their managers would never have gone for it. After all, they'd been pictured less than three feet apart in a shoot only the previous month.
In the end, Kame gives in on the grounds that Inception starts in only ten minutes, so they don't have to wait around in the cinema and risk being spotted. They have just enough time to pick up popcorn and drinks, which Kame tries to pay for but fails when Jin distracts him by pointing out a poster for the new Cameron Diaz movie. By the time Kame turns round again, it's too late.
"You'll go bankrupt if you always insist on paying."
"You shop a lot more than I do," Jin says. "How many appliances have you bought that you don't even know how to use? So I figure I'd better pay when we go out."
Kame can bide his time. He'll get to pay one day, he knows. After all, he managed to treat Matchy, who's had many more years of picking up the check than Jin.
They're still wearing their ridiculous duck hoodies even in the dark cinema. They sit at the back, all the better to hide from fans, and Kame hopes he'll be able to read the subtitles from there or he's not going to follow much of the movie. But from the reviews he's read, it sounds like it's the kind of movie that causes confusion anyway.
The trailers are all boring. Kame amuses himself by pointing out fashion disasters to Jin until he realises that what they're wearing would also count. It's a sad day when Elmo is better dressed than he is.
"Did you just try to grope me?" Jin whispers.
Kame raises both hands, one of which is on his armrest and the other, which is nearest Jin, is in the bucket of popcorn. "Not guilty; I thought I'd wait till the movie started. Try the other side."
Jin turns around to glare at the guy sitting on his right, who flinches and shuffles down towards the end of the row. "I wish people would stop doing that."
"Maybe he has a thing for ducks?" Kame suggests, and then the movie starts and for a moment, he wonders if he's in the wrong screen. Is there supposed to be actual Japanese in this movie?
"See?" Jin murmurs. "Even you can understand some of the film."
Kame retaliates by taking larger handfuls of popcorn than Jin, on occasion stealing pieces right out from under his fingers. But then the closer they get to the bottom of the tub, the closer their fingers get too. Holding hands in a popcorn tub is a messy experience but it's okay as long as they're both covered in salt. It's the closest they can get to a public display of affection, and the closest they want to get unless they're looking for both their careers to come crashing down around them.
To Kame's surprise he finds himself enjoying the movie a great deal, even if it's hard to follow both the action and the subtitles sometimes. He wonder if Jin's even looking at the subtitles or if he's testing his English to the limit. The plot is complicated; he bets Jin's not following half the English dialogue, no matter what he says afterwards.
The girl Ariadne is pretty enough, he thinks, but the real fun for him is watching Arthur and Eames exchange snarky banter - it's a bit like being in KAT-TUN, only with fewer punishment games and more mindbending. And of course Kame's always been rather fond of English accents.
Jin knows it, too, which is why he copies Eames with a pitch-perfect "Darling" in Kame's ear, and Kame almost chokes on his Coke. He contemplates demonstrating how well he's grasped the concept of a "kick" by way of revenge, but the angle's no good.
They both get lost somewhere in the snowy parts and Kame sighs quietly to himself. "I want to go skiing."
"I want to go anywhere," Jin says.
Kame squeezes his hand. "Here's the plan for next year. You conquer America, we'll conquer Asia, and we'll all meet up in Europe for a holiday afterwards. You can buy me expensive stuff in London and I'll get us ashtrays in Paris."
"Deal." Jin squeezes back.
The couple in front turn around and glare at them to shut up, so they guiltily slide their hands free from the popcorn tub and try to look innocent. Kame wipes his salty hand on Jin's duck hoodie, on the grounds that he'll never wear the thing again anyway and the stupid disguises are all Jin's fault in the first place.
It makes Jin giggle and squirm in his seat, unfortunately catching the attention of the couple in front again, and this time the girl gives them a searching stare. Kame pulls the beak down over his eyes but it's too late - they've been recognised. He can tell by the way the girl's eyes light up and her mouth stretches in an incredulous smile, like she can't believe her luck. She jabs her boyfriend in the shoulder and Kame knows they have to leave now.
"But we're missing the end of the movie!" Jin complains as they dash through the foyer, Elmo in tow.
"I'm sure the Internet can tell you." There are all kinds of useful things on the Internet, Kame knows, but he's not very good with it. "Or you can wait for the DVD."
Jin forgets to sulk about leaving early when they manage to make it back to Kame's place without attracting any stalkers. Kame's couch is a lot more comfortable than the cinema seats and there's beer, and ice cream, and baseball on the TV, and they can curl up and talk about sightseeing in Europe till they both drift off, dreaming of towers and bridges and fantastic, far-off places from another world.
Months later, Jin buys the DVD and they watch it again, this time at his apartment. When they reach the end of the movie Kame says, "I think I understood it better before I saw the whole thing."
"I thought I got it." Jin frowns. "Right up until the last minute or so. It looked amazing though, didn't it? With all the scenery bending and stuff."
"It was very impressive. Makes a change from our high school delinquent and rock band movies, doesn't it?"
Jin looks over at his bookcase, where his BANDAGE DVD boxset sits next to Gokusen: The Movie, and sighs. "I'm never going to get to do anything like that in America, am I? It'll be bit parts in obscure indie movies, if I'm lucky."
Kame cups Jin's jaw with his hand and turns him gently away from the DVDs to try out one of the few English lines he remembers from the movie.
"You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling."
Fandom: KAT-TUN
Pairing: Kame/Jin
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 2,000
Disclaimer: Not mine, damnit
Summary: Kame and Jin (and Elmo!) attempt to go to the movies.
A/N: If this seems weird it's because it's a birthday giftfic for the wonderful mnemonic_psych, and I've tried to incorporate some of the things I associate with her. Happy Birthday, Moni! Please excuse the odd timeline.
In-duck-tion
"Do you think we lost them?"
Kame peers out from behind a rack of glittering black cardigans. "I hope so. Next time you decide you want to go on an afternoon date, how about we try a place no one will recognise us, instead of Roppongi Hills?"
Jin shakes his head. "We'd have to leave the country for that, and even then it's not guaranteed. You should've seen the girls trying to stalk me in America."
"I'm surprised you managed to make it through the shop door with such a swelled head."
"What's your problem, huh? At least you managed to get a birthday present for your niece; it's not like this afternoon's been all bad."
"Those crazy fangirls broke the box, though." Kame looks ruefully at the remains of the oversized Elmo doll in his arms. "He's a bit battered. I might have to buy her another one."
"So we'll just jazz him up a little." Jin looks around at the accessories till he finds the perfect hat, and settles the skull-print black fedora on Elmo's head. It just fits. "See? Now he really looks like one of the family."
Sometimes, Kame thinks, Jin has good ideas. Like when they're in a restaurant and Kame's a little tipsy, and Jin suggests skipping dessert and going straight home so they can have their fun before Kame's too drunk to rise to the occasion. Or when Yamapi was feeling down about failing to graduate and Jin suggested a trip to Disney to cheer him up.
Donning disguises of their own in order to avoid rabid fangirls, however, is not one of Jin's better ideas. Not when he decides they'll never be recognised if they dress up as ducks.
"I'm not doing it," Kame says flatly, looking at the downy yellow duck hoodies with barely-concealed disgust. "I'll get fluff all over my shirt."
"It's a shiny purple shirt with sequins and flowers and stuff all over it - it can't look any stranger," Jin points out. "You're already dressing like a teenage girl, so how about dressing like an elementary school boy? Nobody's going to believe THE Kamenashi would ever wear a beak on his head."
Kame thinks back to old Ya-Ya-Yah episodes; he's not so sure about that. "At least I don't show up to collect awards looking like I just stepped out of the shower and threw on the first thing I found on my floor. Besides, everyone's used to seeing you in a yellow animal hoodie."
"Hey!" There are some things Jin cannot let pass. "Don't knock Pikachu."
"Pika pika," Kame says right before he dumps the hoodie on Jin's head.
-----
Ten minutes later, heavily disguised as fashionable young ducks about town, Kame, Jin, and a fedora-wearing Elmo make their way underneath the giant spider towards the cinema. They're not the only oddly dressed people in the area, however.
"Those guys look creepy." Jin shudders as another group of people in black and white robes stride past them, some waving enormous artificial swords. "I wonder why there so many cosplayers around today?"
The first thing they see when they reach the top of the stairs is a poster for a Bleach movie.
"I'm guessing that has something to do with it," Kame says as they walk through the doors. "Come on, let's get in the queue behind Aizen."
"Do you think that's safe?"
Kame flexes a decidedly un-ducklike bicep. "I can take him, unless his bankai involves rollercoasters. Then you're on your own."
"If it's rollercoasters, I'll handle it," Jin says, sounding ridiculously gallant for someone wearing oversized sunglasses and a duck's bill on his head. "I'll protect you, like Mildmay protects Felix."
"Mildmay?" The name acquires a couple of extra syllables when Kame says it. "Is this another one of your weird American shows?"
"Not a TV show," Jin explains. "I'm reading some books to practise my English, and a friend suggested these fantasy novels. Felix is this crazy redhaired wizard with all these rings and tattoos, and then Mildmay's his half-brother and he's a cat burglar, except they don't know they're related at first and-"
"It sounds fascinating," Kame says, hating to interrupt Jin when he's so enthusiastic about something. "But we're almost at the front of the queue and we still haven't decided what we're seeing."
The cinema was sort of an unfinished plan, concocted over Starbucks right before the fans found them, and they hadn't had a chance to discuss their viewing options. Jin had barely had time to finish his drink.
"How about Inception?" Jin suggests. "I hear it's pretty good."
"But it doesn't have Johnny Depp." Kame points at a poster down the far end of the box office. "That one does."
"It's got Leonardo DiCaprio?" Jin tries. "You thought he was good in Titanic, remember."
What Kame remembers the most about Titanic is a Wink Up photoshoot where they'd all taken turns pretending to be Jack and Rose, and somehow the shot of Jin-as-Rose with Nakamaru-as-Jack had made it into the magazine. Kame would've preferred the one where he was Jack, but their managers would never have gone for it. After all, they'd been pictured less than three feet apart in a shoot only the previous month.
In the end, Kame gives in on the grounds that Inception starts in only ten minutes, so they don't have to wait around in the cinema and risk being spotted. They have just enough time to pick up popcorn and drinks, which Kame tries to pay for but fails when Jin distracts him by pointing out a poster for the new Cameron Diaz movie. By the time Kame turns round again, it's too late.
"You'll go bankrupt if you always insist on paying."
"You shop a lot more than I do," Jin says. "How many appliances have you bought that you don't even know how to use? So I figure I'd better pay when we go out."
Kame can bide his time. He'll get to pay one day, he knows. After all, he managed to treat Matchy, who's had many more years of picking up the check than Jin.
They're still wearing their ridiculous duck hoodies even in the dark cinema. They sit at the back, all the better to hide from fans, and Kame hopes he'll be able to read the subtitles from there or he's not going to follow much of the movie. But from the reviews he's read, it sounds like it's the kind of movie that causes confusion anyway.
The trailers are all boring. Kame amuses himself by pointing out fashion disasters to Jin until he realises that what they're wearing would also count. It's a sad day when Elmo is better dressed than he is.
"Did you just try to grope me?" Jin whispers.
Kame raises both hands, one of which is on his armrest and the other, which is nearest Jin, is in the bucket of popcorn. "Not guilty; I thought I'd wait till the movie started. Try the other side."
Jin turns around to glare at the guy sitting on his right, who flinches and shuffles down towards the end of the row. "I wish people would stop doing that."
"Maybe he has a thing for ducks?" Kame suggests, and then the movie starts and for a moment, he wonders if he's in the wrong screen. Is there supposed to be actual Japanese in this movie?
"See?" Jin murmurs. "Even you can understand some of the film."
Kame retaliates by taking larger handfuls of popcorn than Jin, on occasion stealing pieces right out from under his fingers. But then the closer they get to the bottom of the tub, the closer their fingers get too. Holding hands in a popcorn tub is a messy experience but it's okay as long as they're both covered in salt. It's the closest they can get to a public display of affection, and the closest they want to get unless they're looking for both their careers to come crashing down around them.
To Kame's surprise he finds himself enjoying the movie a great deal, even if it's hard to follow both the action and the subtitles sometimes. He wonder if Jin's even looking at the subtitles or if he's testing his English to the limit. The plot is complicated; he bets Jin's not following half the English dialogue, no matter what he says afterwards.
The girl Ariadne is pretty enough, he thinks, but the real fun for him is watching Arthur and Eames exchange snarky banter - it's a bit like being in KAT-TUN, only with fewer punishment games and more mindbending. And of course Kame's always been rather fond of English accents.
Jin knows it, too, which is why he copies Eames with a pitch-perfect "Darling" in Kame's ear, and Kame almost chokes on his Coke. He contemplates demonstrating how well he's grasped the concept of a "kick" by way of revenge, but the angle's no good.
They both get lost somewhere in the snowy parts and Kame sighs quietly to himself. "I want to go skiing."
"I want to go anywhere," Jin says.
Kame squeezes his hand. "Here's the plan for next year. You conquer America, we'll conquer Asia, and we'll all meet up in Europe for a holiday afterwards. You can buy me expensive stuff in London and I'll get us ashtrays in Paris."
"Deal." Jin squeezes back.
The couple in front turn around and glare at them to shut up, so they guiltily slide their hands free from the popcorn tub and try to look innocent. Kame wipes his salty hand on Jin's duck hoodie, on the grounds that he'll never wear the thing again anyway and the stupid disguises are all Jin's fault in the first place.
It makes Jin giggle and squirm in his seat, unfortunately catching the attention of the couple in front again, and this time the girl gives them a searching stare. Kame pulls the beak down over his eyes but it's too late - they've been recognised. He can tell by the way the girl's eyes light up and her mouth stretches in an incredulous smile, like she can't believe her luck. She jabs her boyfriend in the shoulder and Kame knows they have to leave now.
"But we're missing the end of the movie!" Jin complains as they dash through the foyer, Elmo in tow.
"I'm sure the Internet can tell you." There are all kinds of useful things on the Internet, Kame knows, but he's not very good with it. "Or you can wait for the DVD."
Jin forgets to sulk about leaving early when they manage to make it back to Kame's place without attracting any stalkers. Kame's couch is a lot more comfortable than the cinema seats and there's beer, and ice cream, and baseball on the TV, and they can curl up and talk about sightseeing in Europe till they both drift off, dreaming of towers and bridges and fantastic, far-off places from another world.
Months later, Jin buys the DVD and they watch it again, this time at his apartment. When they reach the end of the movie Kame says, "I think I understood it better before I saw the whole thing."
"I thought I got it." Jin frowns. "Right up until the last minute or so. It looked amazing though, didn't it? With all the scenery bending and stuff."
"It was very impressive. Makes a change from our high school delinquent and rock band movies, doesn't it?"
Jin looks over at his bookcase, where his BANDAGE DVD boxset sits next to Gokusen: The Movie, and sighs. "I'm never going to get to do anything like that in America, am I? It'll be bit parts in obscure indie movies, if I'm lucky."
Kame cups Jin's jaw with his hand and turns him gently away from the DVDs to try out one of the few English lines he remembers from the movie.
"You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling."