this icon's for you ;)
GOD DAMMIT. All day, my internet's been wonky and only let me online for two minutes at a time. I finally fixed it and I'm very sorry that it's this late in the day, but Ryan...here you go.
When we last left our heroine....
She was very happily married, as Mrs. Mike Shinoda.
Together, they had lots of brown babies together. (Who knows why they were brown. Ryan, anything you'd like to tell us?)
And her very very best friend, Lexie, was very happily married to the one and only Paul McCartney.
Life couldn't get much better.
But, as time went by, it was obvious that there was trouble in paradise.
One day, a young man moved in next door to the Shinodas. All Ryan knew about him was that he came from another country. Being the nice little neighbor that she is, Ryan decided to be nice and bring him some cookies, to welcome him to the neighboorhood. She went next door and rang the doorbell. "Come in!" A voice said.
Ryan opened the door...and this is what she saw.
"Oh! I'm so sorry!"
"No, it's fine." The hunky young man said. "Damn...girl, get over here."
And before she knew it, she and the new neighbor were making sweet love on his coffee table. Whoops.
In the middle of the act, she heard the front door open. "Excuse me? Is anyone home? My wife came over here about six hours ago and..."
Ryan turned to the front door, still beneath Ewan's sweaty naked body. It was Mike at the door.
And, with that, he angrily grabbed the microphone that he conveniently kept in his pocket at all times, and attacked Ewan with it.
Ryan quickly pulled her clothes back on, and snuck out the back door. She didn't know what to do. But she knew that her best friend Lexie was always there for her, and walked over to London to visit her at the mansion that she and Paul shared.
To her surprise, when she arrived at the house (what a quick walk), Lexie was outside crying. She wasked her what was wrong, and Lexie weeped, "It's me and Paul. It's...we're...it's over."
"But what! Why? You guys were so in love!">
"Well..." Lexie began. "I caught him cheating on me, with some slutty redhead."
"And then again with some sleazy blonde."
"And yet again with some one-legged blonde bitch."
"Oh my god! Lexie! That's terrible!"
"Nah. It's okay. I was screwing his hunky best friend, George, the whole time anyway."
The two girls sat for a while, both feeling sorry for themselves. Then, suddenly, a white glow appeared. A figure of a man appeared in front of them, wearing the most angelic white t-shirt they'd both ever seen....
"Who are you?" They both asked.
"I...I am God." The man said.
"My name is Tom. I have come to tell you that you have superpowers."
"Yeah, yeah, we know. We're the Charmed Ones." Lexie said.
"Not just that....you're also...in fact...Power Rangers." Myspace Tom said.
"Gasp!"
"Not only that...your good friends Sarah and Dez are also Power Rangers." Tom snapped, and the two other girls appeared next to them.
"What the fuck..." Dez said, looking around. "Where the fuck am I?"
God snapped again, and the four girls took on their Power Rangers alter-egos.
"Your mission, girls, should you choose to accept it...is to live out a fan-fiction. One involving you four and...."
"...THE BACKSTREET BOYS!"
"Fuck yeah!" The girls yelled.
Tom snapped his fingers once again, and with that, the girls were transported to a hotel in Hershey, Pennsylvania. Over the next few weeks they laughed, cried, and ultimately fell in love with the Backstreet Boys. I'd go into more detail, but there is an actual fan-fiction about this and I want to save it for a shitty-fan fic night. ;x
ANYWAY.
Finally, the time had come. They'd reached the end of their journey, and they end of their shitty fan-fiction. They knew it was time to go. So the girls kissed their Boys goodbye, and with that, were returned back to Lexie's flat in London.
Sarah and Dez were returned back to where they'd come from, and Lexie and Ryan were left to relect upon their journey. Not just the one they'd returned from, but the ups and downs of their six year long friendship. They lived happily ever after.
Okay, that was cheesy and much much worse than the one I did for you last year, but honestly the sequel is never as good as the real thing. Ry baby, I just want you to know that I still adore you, and I'm always gonna be there for you. You're amazing, and I'm still amazed that we've been friends for so long, but confident that we'll stay close for ever and ever and ever. Happy 18th my love, and I hope it's amazing. Give me a week to finish buying stuff for your care package, and I swear on George Harrison's ashes that I'll have it out to you by Friday.
When we last left our heroine....
She was very happily married, as Mrs. Mike Shinoda.
Together, they had lots of brown babies together. (Who knows why they were brown. Ryan, anything you'd like to tell us?)
And her very very best friend, Lexie, was very happily married to the one and only Paul McCartney.
Life couldn't get much better.
But, as time went by, it was obvious that there was trouble in paradise.
One day, a young man moved in next door to the Shinodas. All Ryan knew about him was that he came from another country. Being the nice little neighbor that she is, Ryan decided to be nice and bring him some cookies, to welcome him to the neighboorhood. She went next door and rang the doorbell. "Come in!" A voice said.
Ryan opened the door...and this is what she saw.
"Oh! I'm so sorry!"
"No, it's fine." The hunky young man said. "Damn...girl, get over here."
And before she knew it, she and the new neighbor were making sweet love on his coffee table. Whoops.
In the middle of the act, she heard the front door open. "Excuse me? Is anyone home? My wife came over here about six hours ago and..."
Ryan turned to the front door, still beneath Ewan's sweaty naked body. It was Mike at the door.
And, with that, he angrily grabbed the microphone that he conveniently kept in his pocket at all times, and attacked Ewan with it.
Ryan quickly pulled her clothes back on, and snuck out the back door. She didn't know what to do. But she knew that her best friend Lexie was always there for her, and walked over to London to visit her at the mansion that she and Paul shared.
To her surprise, when she arrived at the house (what a quick walk), Lexie was outside crying. She wasked her what was wrong, and Lexie weeped, "It's me and Paul. It's...we're...it's over."
"But what! Why? You guys were so in love!">
"Well..." Lexie began. "I caught him cheating on me, with some slutty redhead."
"And then again with some sleazy blonde."
"And yet again with some one-legged blonde bitch."
"Oh my god! Lexie! That's terrible!"
"Nah. It's okay. I was screwing his hunky best friend, George, the whole time anyway."
The two girls sat for a while, both feeling sorry for themselves. Then, suddenly, a white glow appeared. A figure of a man appeared in front of them, wearing the most angelic white t-shirt they'd both ever seen....
"Who are you?" They both asked.
"I...I am God." The man said.
"My name is Tom. I have come to tell you that you have superpowers."
"Yeah, yeah, we know. We're the Charmed Ones." Lexie said.
"Not just that....you're also...in fact...Power Rangers." Myspace Tom said.
"Gasp!"
"Not only that...your good friends Sarah and Dez are also Power Rangers." Tom snapped, and the two other girls appeared next to them.
"What the fuck..." Dez said, looking around. "Where the fuck am I?"
God snapped again, and the four girls took on their Power Rangers alter-egos.
"Your mission, girls, should you choose to accept it...is to live out a fan-fiction. One involving you four and...."
"...THE BACKSTREET BOYS!"
"Fuck yeah!" The girls yelled.
Tom snapped his fingers once again, and with that, the girls were transported to a hotel in Hershey, Pennsylvania. Over the next few weeks they laughed, cried, and ultimately fell in love with the Backstreet Boys. I'd go into more detail, but there is an actual fan-fiction about this and I want to save it for a shitty-fan fic night. ;x
ANYWAY.
Finally, the time had come. They'd reached the end of their journey, and they end of their shitty fan-fiction. They knew it was time to go. So the girls kissed their Boys goodbye, and with that, were returned back to Lexie's flat in London.
Sarah and Dez were returned back to where they'd come from, and Lexie and Ryan were left to relect upon their journey. Not just the one they'd returned from, but the ups and downs of their six year long friendship. They lived happily ever after.
Okay, that was cheesy and much much worse than the one I did for you last year, but honestly the sequel is never as good as the real thing. Ry baby, I just want you to know that I still adore you, and I'm always gonna be there for you. You're amazing, and I'm still amazed that we've been friends for so long, but confident that we'll stay close for ever and ever and ever. Happy 18th my love, and I hope it's amazing. Give me a week to finish buying stuff for your care package, and I swear on George Harrison's ashes that I'll have it out to you by Friday.