With a little bit more character for show
Title: With a little bit more character for show
Author: alles_luege
Pairing: gen with Brendon/Gerard
Rating: PG -13
Summary: A story about Spencer being an awesome friend and Brendon trying to be one as well when things start to fall apart.
“So...?” Brendon asks, waiting for Spencer to tell him how things are between him and Ryan now. Whether he needs to hide his coffee, so it doesn't get poisoned or something.
“Just...don't tell him when Gerard tops,” Spencer answers, smirking.
Warning(s): break-up fic
Author’s Notes: For littleladypunk because she is awesome and just asked for Brendon-fic. I love to write Brendon-fic! Also, I totally got into the spirit of things and wrote her two stories...\o/
Title: Panic! at the disco.
Word Count: 1.415
Beta: asm_z
Disclaimer: Don’t know, don’t own, not real.
~1~
“So...” Brendon says and he doesn't know how to finish that sentence, because it's all really obvious. Clear as day.
“Get in,” Spencer answers; Ryan, beside him, stays quiet. Brendon knows they have their own shit to deal with, but it's not like he does it on purpose.
“You look like shit,” Ryan says from the back-seat.
“I'm just tired.” He answers, and it's the truth, but it's more like he is tired of arguing with his parents than anything else. He leans his head on the cold car window and closes his eyes. “Don't fall asleep now...” he hears Ryan's voice say, but it's really quiet and he is just so tired.
~+~
He wakes up to pale sunlight filtering through the window. It's all too familiar by now, how Spencer's room looks in the morning. He closes his eyes firmly again, turns around to block out the light, and snuggles closer to whoever is sleeping in front of him. By the smell and sharp angles, it's Ryan and this is all too familiar as well. He inhales Ryan's stupid scent and exhales.
“Hey...” Ryan mumbles, his hand on Brendon's hip tightens a bit, his fingers tangled in the fabric of the shirt Brendon borrowed from Spencer last night.
“Hey...” Brendon mumbles into his collarbone.
“Wanna get up...?” Ryan asks. Brendon really needs to piss, but he kinda feels okay just lying in Spencer's bed, so he shakes his head a bit and Ryan nods. “Okay.”
~+~
Breakfast is a quiet affair, as they all feel really tired. Spencer's parents and his sisters are out of town visiting relatives, so Spencer makes pancakes. Ryan makes tea and horrible coffee. Brendon doesn’t complain; he is a guest here, and plus, he’s still tired. It's a bone deep tiredness that has nothing to do with not enough sleep.
“Syrup?” Brendon asks. Spencer nods, as does Ryan. Brendon gets up from the chair and gets the syrup from the second cupboard on the left. Even this feels too familiar. And not. It's a strange feeling.
“You should just tell them,” Ryan says.
“They will throw me out,” Brendon answers. Spencer looks sharply at him, like Brendon is crazy, but the truth is that Spencer doesn't know how it feels when your parents think you are a disappointment.
“It's the truth, Spence.” Brendon says, taking a sip of the horrible coffee Ryan made and waits.
“You can come live with me. I'm sure my mom wouldn't mind.”
“Right...”
“Brendon,” Spencer says, reaching out and dragging him by his neck until their foreheads touch.
“I’m here for you,” he adds and Brendon can't help but smile.
~2~
“Because he is the enemy!” Ryan rages on. Brendon is so pissed off it's not even funny. He has Ryan pinned to the wall and knows that there will be bruises, but this is none of Ryan's business, for fuck's sake!
“I don't care, besides he is not the fucking enemy! For god's sake. Get a grip!” He answers, nearly shouting it into Ryan's stupid face.
“What the hell?” Spencer wants to know as he enters the bus. Brendon takes a calming breath, lets go of Ryan and takes a step back.
“He’s sleeping with Way!” Ryan says, as if it were a crime. In Ryan's twisted head, it totally is a crime.
“You're doing what?” Spencer asks, turning to face Brendon.
“We’re not fucking...”
“But you want to!” Ryan spits.
“Yeah and it is none of your business,” Brendon answers.
“He talked shit about us!”
“And Spencer about them. I think we're even.”
“Ryan,” Spencer says and his voice sounds hard.
“What?”
“We need to talk.”
“You've got to be kidding me!” Ryan says. Brendon doesn't grin, just leaves the bus so they can talk about it.
~+~
“So...you and Way?” Jon says, leaning against the warm metal of the bus, smoking a cigarette.
“Yeah..”
“Which one?”
“Gerard,” Brendon says.
“No wonder Ryan is so pissed off.” Jon says. And yeah, Brendon understands, okay, but he didn't mean to, like, fall for stupid Gerard Way.
“I know he was Ryan's hero and what not, but I can't...it's what I feel.” Brendon says. Jon nods.
“I know, just give him time...and, if he tops, don't let him know.” Jon says. Brendon blushes. Fuck Jon for being awesome.
~+~
“So...?” Brendon asks, waiting for Spencer to tell him how things are between him and Ryan now. Whether he needs to hide his coffee, so it doesn't get poisoned or something.
“Just...don't tell him when Gerard tops,” Spencer answers, smirking.
“Fuck you guys, honestly,” Brendon answers. And then softer: “Thanks, Spence.”
“Yeah, whatever...you know...” Spencer answers.
“Yeah,” because Brendon really does.
~3~
Spencer’s fingers feel cold. Ice cold. Brendon isn't sure how he can even register this, as his own feel exactly the same, he is sure of it.
“What?” Spencer asks. His voice sounds strange, Brendon thinks.
“I want to leave the band...” Ryan says, and he looks directly at Spencer as he says it. As if he owes Spencer that much. And the truth is, Brendon thinks, the fucking truth is, he does.
“You want to leave the band for good? Not just taking a break, because we could take a break...just do other things. Like...like Mike Shinoda!” Brendon says. Spencer turns from Ryan to look at Brendon, and Brendon blushes. Spencer smiles. “What? He has two bands...he...it's a good idea!” Brendon says.
“Yeah, it is.” Spencer answers, squeezing his hand. Brendon squeezes back.
“It won’t work...Jon...Jon wants to leave too,” Ryan says, and he is still staring at Spencer.
“Of course.” Spencer says beside him, as if he knew. And maybe he did. He knows Ryan better than anyone else, maybe better than Ryan knows himself.
“I...” Ryan begins and Brendon wants to hurt him. He really does.
“Brendon...” Spencer says. Brendon pulls his hand away. He is so angry. So god-damned angry, like all those years ago when he was so tired, and then later when he was so fucking crushed. And Spencer was always there.
“I need some air,” he says. He doesn't want to leave Spencer to deal with this alone, but he can't be in the room with Ryan either. Not right now.
The last thing he hears is arguing.
~+~
He meets Jon outside the house. He is leaning against the wall, smoking.
“So, you are leaving with him?” Brendon says, and he is still angry, but not as much at Jon. Because he somehow knows this is Ryan's fault.
“Yeah, can't let him do this shit on his own.” Jon says, exhaling smoke. He reminds Brendon of Gerard when he does this, but maybe that’s because Brendon liked to watch Gerard smoke or something. Now is not the time or the place to be thinking about it.
“He is leaving because of Spencer, right?” Brendon asks, because he has figured this shit out already, he just wants Ryan to see sense and take it all back.
“Yeah...he needs to be on his own...”
“Except not,” Brendon says and it comes out more bitter than he wanted, but he just...he is just so angry, that is what he is.
“He never could be...and now he just can't rely on Spence anymore”
“Or that's what his stupid brain is thinking.” Brendon says.
“Bren...”
“Fuck you for being so awesome, Jon Walker. Fuck you!” Brendon says, softly and Jon laughs, his warm fingers squeezing Brendon's arm. “I’ll miss you.”
“Yeah...I’ll miss you too.” Jon says.
~+~
“I want to hurt him.” Brendon says.
“That's so stupid, Bren,” Spencer answers, putting pancakes on his plate.
“You want to hurt him too.”
“I don't...” Spencer answers.
“I wrote this song...” Brendon says.
“That’s going to hurt him?”
“That expresses my feelings on that matter,” Brendon answers, and doesn't add that it totally, maybe, expresses Spencer's feelings on that matter as well.
“Bren...”
“I’m here for you.” Brendon says, grabbing Spencer by his neck and making their foreheads touch. Spencer closes his eyes and smiles.
~end~
Author: alles_luege
Pairing: gen with Brendon/Gerard
Rating: PG -13
Summary: A story about Spencer being an awesome friend and Brendon trying to be one as well when things start to fall apart.
“So...?” Brendon asks, waiting for Spencer to tell him how things are between him and Ryan now. Whether he needs to hide his coffee, so it doesn't get poisoned or something.
“Just...don't tell him when Gerard tops,” Spencer answers, smirking.
Warning(s): break-up fic
Author’s Notes: For littleladypunk because she is awesome and just asked for Brendon-fic. I love to write Brendon-fic! Also, I totally got into the spirit of things and wrote her two stories...\o/
Title: Panic! at the disco.
Word Count: 1.415
Beta: asm_z
Disclaimer: Don’t know, don’t own, not real.
~1~
“So...” Brendon says and he doesn't know how to finish that sentence, because it's all really obvious. Clear as day.
“Get in,” Spencer answers; Ryan, beside him, stays quiet. Brendon knows they have their own shit to deal with, but it's not like he does it on purpose.
“You look like shit,” Ryan says from the back-seat.
“I'm just tired.” He answers, and it's the truth, but it's more like he is tired of arguing with his parents than anything else. He leans his head on the cold car window and closes his eyes. “Don't fall asleep now...” he hears Ryan's voice say, but it's really quiet and he is just so tired.
~+~
He wakes up to pale sunlight filtering through the window. It's all too familiar by now, how Spencer's room looks in the morning. He closes his eyes firmly again, turns around to block out the light, and snuggles closer to whoever is sleeping in front of him. By the smell and sharp angles, it's Ryan and this is all too familiar as well. He inhales Ryan's stupid scent and exhales.
“Hey...” Ryan mumbles, his hand on Brendon's hip tightens a bit, his fingers tangled in the fabric of the shirt Brendon borrowed from Spencer last night.
“Hey...” Brendon mumbles into his collarbone.
“Wanna get up...?” Ryan asks. Brendon really needs to piss, but he kinda feels okay just lying in Spencer's bed, so he shakes his head a bit and Ryan nods. “Okay.”
~+~
Breakfast is a quiet affair, as they all feel really tired. Spencer's parents and his sisters are out of town visiting relatives, so Spencer makes pancakes. Ryan makes tea and horrible coffee. Brendon doesn’t complain; he is a guest here, and plus, he’s still tired. It's a bone deep tiredness that has nothing to do with not enough sleep.
“Syrup?” Brendon asks. Spencer nods, as does Ryan. Brendon gets up from the chair and gets the syrup from the second cupboard on the left. Even this feels too familiar. And not. It's a strange feeling.
“You should just tell them,” Ryan says.
“They will throw me out,” Brendon answers. Spencer looks sharply at him, like Brendon is crazy, but the truth is that Spencer doesn't know how it feels when your parents think you are a disappointment.
“It's the truth, Spence.” Brendon says, taking a sip of the horrible coffee Ryan made and waits.
“You can come live with me. I'm sure my mom wouldn't mind.”
“Right...”
“Brendon,” Spencer says, reaching out and dragging him by his neck until their foreheads touch.
“I’m here for you,” he adds and Brendon can't help but smile.
~2~
“Because he is the enemy!” Ryan rages on. Brendon is so pissed off it's not even funny. He has Ryan pinned to the wall and knows that there will be bruises, but this is none of Ryan's business, for fuck's sake!
“I don't care, besides he is not the fucking enemy! For god's sake. Get a grip!” He answers, nearly shouting it into Ryan's stupid face.
“What the hell?” Spencer wants to know as he enters the bus. Brendon takes a calming breath, lets go of Ryan and takes a step back.
“He’s sleeping with Way!” Ryan says, as if it were a crime. In Ryan's twisted head, it totally is a crime.
“You're doing what?” Spencer asks, turning to face Brendon.
“We’re not fucking...”
“But you want to!” Ryan spits.
“Yeah and it is none of your business,” Brendon answers.
“He talked shit about us!”
“And Spencer about them. I think we're even.”
“Ryan,” Spencer says and his voice sounds hard.
“What?”
“We need to talk.”
“You've got to be kidding me!” Ryan says. Brendon doesn't grin, just leaves the bus so they can talk about it.
~+~
“So...you and Way?” Jon says, leaning against the warm metal of the bus, smoking a cigarette.
“Yeah..”
“Which one?”
“Gerard,” Brendon says.
“No wonder Ryan is so pissed off.” Jon says. And yeah, Brendon understands, okay, but he didn't mean to, like, fall for stupid Gerard Way.
“I know he was Ryan's hero and what not, but I can't...it's what I feel.” Brendon says. Jon nods.
“I know, just give him time...and, if he tops, don't let him know.” Jon says. Brendon blushes. Fuck Jon for being awesome.
~+~
“So...?” Brendon asks, waiting for Spencer to tell him how things are between him and Ryan now. Whether he needs to hide his coffee, so it doesn't get poisoned or something.
“Just...don't tell him when Gerard tops,” Spencer answers, smirking.
“Fuck you guys, honestly,” Brendon answers. And then softer: “Thanks, Spence.”
“Yeah, whatever...you know...” Spencer answers.
“Yeah,” because Brendon really does.
~3~
Spencer’s fingers feel cold. Ice cold. Brendon isn't sure how he can even register this, as his own feel exactly the same, he is sure of it.
“What?” Spencer asks. His voice sounds strange, Brendon thinks.
“I want to leave the band...” Ryan says, and he looks directly at Spencer as he says it. As if he owes Spencer that much. And the truth is, Brendon thinks, the fucking truth is, he does.
“You want to leave the band for good? Not just taking a break, because we could take a break...just do other things. Like...like Mike Shinoda!” Brendon says. Spencer turns from Ryan to look at Brendon, and Brendon blushes. Spencer smiles. “What? He has two bands...he...it's a good idea!” Brendon says.
“Yeah, it is.” Spencer answers, squeezing his hand. Brendon squeezes back.
“It won’t work...Jon...Jon wants to leave too,” Ryan says, and he is still staring at Spencer.
“Of course.” Spencer says beside him, as if he knew. And maybe he did. He knows Ryan better than anyone else, maybe better than Ryan knows himself.
“I...” Ryan begins and Brendon wants to hurt him. He really does.
“Brendon...” Spencer says. Brendon pulls his hand away. He is so angry. So god-damned angry, like all those years ago when he was so tired, and then later when he was so fucking crushed. And Spencer was always there.
“I need some air,” he says. He doesn't want to leave Spencer to deal with this alone, but he can't be in the room with Ryan either. Not right now.
The last thing he hears is arguing.
~+~
He meets Jon outside the house. He is leaning against the wall, smoking.
“So, you are leaving with him?” Brendon says, and he is still angry, but not as much at Jon. Because he somehow knows this is Ryan's fault.
“Yeah, can't let him do this shit on his own.” Jon says, exhaling smoke. He reminds Brendon of Gerard when he does this, but maybe that’s because Brendon liked to watch Gerard smoke or something. Now is not the time or the place to be thinking about it.
“He is leaving because of Spencer, right?” Brendon asks, because he has figured this shit out already, he just wants Ryan to see sense and take it all back.
“Yeah...he needs to be on his own...”
“Except not,” Brendon says and it comes out more bitter than he wanted, but he just...he is just so angry, that is what he is.
“He never could be...and now he just can't rely on Spence anymore”
“Or that's what his stupid brain is thinking.” Brendon says.
“Bren...”
“Fuck you for being so awesome, Jon Walker. Fuck you!” Brendon says, softly and Jon laughs, his warm fingers squeezing Brendon's arm. “I’ll miss you.”
“Yeah...I’ll miss you too.” Jon says.
~+~
“I want to hurt him.” Brendon says.
“That's so stupid, Bren,” Spencer answers, putting pancakes on his plate.
“You want to hurt him too.”
“I don't...” Spencer answers.
“I wrote this song...” Brendon says.
“That’s going to hurt him?”
“That expresses my feelings on that matter,” Brendon answers, and doesn't add that it totally, maybe, expresses Spencer's feelings on that matter as well.
“Bren...”
“I’m here for you.” Brendon says, grabbing Spencer by his neck and making their foreheads touch. Spencer closes his eyes and smiles.
~end~