i wish you were here right now ( Read more... )

you told me to give it a try
this is me trying
one day at a time
im taking it easier

these days

i find

go quicker if i try to forget (and i do)
how life is better without you

i noticed
you kept your flask in the pocket of your blazer
when you see me, for special occasions
to slip into something more comfortable-
a film of indifference
and you know this sweet warm place
where nothing touches your thick wet lips
eyes glazed with apathy;
being so careless has paid off
in full. see?
look at me when im typing to you.

matt gave me an awesome mix cd for my birthday and these imogen heap song came on during my run tonight on the last stretch and i started crying- yay steriods. yay angst.

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Inside out, upside-down twisting beside myself,
Stop that now, cos you and I were never meant to me
I think you better leave; it's ( Read more... )

i feel as though i am gradually letting down everyone in my life
and being miserable
maybe its the steriods- ha, roid rage
but im losing hope in something that i cant even put my finger on
__________________________________________________

I want to know your plans and how involved in them I am.
When I go to sleep for good will I be forgiven?
And If you ( Read more... )

We have a whole life to live together you fucker, but it can't start until you call.- You and me and everyone we know

holy shit
im 21
:)

I left ballet today, I told Pam I was sick
some stomach bug/going around crane/sick during chorus
BULLshit
I JUST COULDNT TAKE AN HOUR AND A HALF OF LOOKING AT MYSLEF IN A HUGE MIRROR
I didn’t mean for caps lock to be on for that- but it definitely worked and i will take artistic credit for it.
so i did Russian diction hw instead and practiced
and ( Read more... )

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

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I might saved a little trouble for the next girl,
Cause the next time that he cheats...

Oh, you know it won't be on me

i had a dream that i just sight read "fill my cup" at a funeral of a boy from high school.  pieces of hosmer choir as well as john reagan were sightreading the piece and sharing music.
i need to stop doing drugs clearly because that dream amde nooooo sense.
today is a homework day and a workout day
today is not a day to map out my life
maybe