Since I've been Loving You Chapter 1
Chapter 1
Chapter 1:
“Dan! Danny! Daniel fucking Cauthorn!”
Jensen groans and turns back in his bed, pulling his pillow over his head to try and tune out his roommate, Misha.
But, of course, Misha grabs his blanket and pulls it off.
“Uggghhh,” he whines, a very manly whine, mind you, “Miisssha.”
“Daannnnyy,” Misha mimics, holding out the word.
“You're like my mother. She used to wake me up like that,” Jensen says, finally sitting up in bed and resting his head on his hands.
“Well, god bless the poor woman that had to do that everyday. She must have be a saint.”
“Haha, very funny Meesh,” Jensen says sarcastically.
“I know,” Misha responds, “Now, get you ass up and get dressed! We're gonna be late! Or, you are, anyways.”
“Fine! Fine! I get it! Shesh... some people,” Jensen grumbles, pulling himself out of bed and rummaging through his clothes, while Misha gets dressed on the other side of the room.
He eventually finds a shirt, some jeans, and UT sweatshirt that smells okay to wear over, even though it ever got below sixty or seventy degrees during August in Austin.
Jensen ducks into a corner of the room, behind a dresser where he knows Misha won’t see him change, and throws on his clothes as quickly as possible, hating not having layers of clothes on, no matter how short the time it is.
Misha has long ago gotten used to Jensen's weird quirk of always wearing long sleeves and jeans, and never changing where people could see him.
Jensen let Misha believe what ever he wanted. But he's just lucky he got Misha as roommate because he has as many weird quirks as Jensen, so he can't bother Jensen for his. He never asks about it. Just accepts that his friend is hunting for privacy in a place where there was no privacy, and lets him be.
It's always weird looking in the mirror and seeing black hair instead of dirty blonde. Even after four years of being Danny Cauthorn instead of Jensen Ackles, he still can't remember to respond to Danny sometimes or has gotten used to the minor changes in his appearance. He still hates that he has to hide his entire life from his best friend. Or, new best friend. He'd left behind all his other friends that he'd known since childhood in Richardson. The ones that mourned him and went to the funeral of Jensen Ackles because his “death” had to seem real.
“Well,” says Misha, suddenly appearing behind Jensen, where he is trying futilely to make his unruly hair sit somewhat nicely in front of the mirror, “if you're done primping, I'd like to go.”
“Jesus!” Jensen yells. “Scare the living shit out of a man why don't ya?”
“Well, I'm not exactly scaring the living shit out of a man. I'm scaring the living shit out of you,” Misha says, a small smirk on his face.
“Fuck you, Collins,” Jensen replies lovingly, while pulling his shoes on.
“I'm flattered, really, but I don't roll that way.”
Jensen rolls his eyes at his friend, before walking out the door.
***
Jensen and Misha continue joking with each other as they walked out of the dorm and across the campus to find their respective classes.
Ten minutes later Jensen's staring at his schedule, reading the room number and building of his first class for the ten-trillionth time, even though he has it memorized by now. Trying to find his class and hoping that he was in the right building. He's tempted to run back outside and check the number even when he knows it will say the exact same thing it did when he checked before walking in.
While he's carefully examining the piece of paper with the room he needs to find, he isn't paying attention to the people around him, and runs right smack dab into some guy.
“Ooomp,” Jensen grunts as he falls to the ground, all his papers and books scattering out from his backpack.
“Oh, shit, sorry man!” says the person Jensen had run into. “Here, let me help. Shit. Wow, I'm really sorry,” he repeats, while bending down to help Jensen gather his stuff and shove it into his bag.
“Thanks,” says Jensen quietly, after getting his stuff into his bag and standing back up.
He looks up at the guy he'd run into.... and up, and up, and up
He's a frickin' giant! Jensen has never considered himself short at a solid 6'1”, but damn, this guy makes him look like a child!
Then, Jensen notices his smile. He has an amazing smile. And pretty eyes...
Damn it, Jensen! What's the matter with you? Why would you even think that? You're not gay.
Well, maybe his mind was thinking all that. His dick on the other hand... well, that's another story.
“Jared,” says the man, extending his gigantic hand towards Jensen. Jensen's mind, which was apparently not cooperating or listening to him, just had to wonder if every part of Jared was gigantic.
Shit! The last thing I need is to start tenting in the middle of the hallway like some fifteen year old kid who's never seen any real action.
Jensen realizes that he's just been standing there while the guy, Jared, is waiting for him to introduce himself.
“Je-Danny,” says Jensen, in such a rush to make up for looking like an ass and leaving Jared hanging, that he almost said 'Jensen' and he's able to just correct himself, then reach out to shake Jared's hand.
“Jadanny?” asks Jared, Jensen's slip of the tongue not getting past him, with a quirked eyebrow.
“Danny,” says Jensen. “Just Danny.”
“Whatever you say Ja-Danny,” Jared says with a mischievous sparkle in his brown eyes.
Jensen scowls at Jared and he laughs.
“So, what's your class?”
“Psych 101 with,” Jensen looks at his schedule, “uh... Professor Greenwood.”
“Cool!” says Jared. “Me too!” His face lights up in a smile and his dimples come out. He looks like a fucking puppy-dog.
Again, with the weird analogies and thoughts about this very male person you just met Jensen! God! What's the matter with you?
As it turns out, Jensen and his amazing directional sense had managed to walk right past his classroom. But, despite the accident in the hallway and Jensen's inability to get up in the morning, Jared and Jensen walk in on time.
Jensen and Jared sit in the middle of the classroom, and after Professor Greenwood has vaguely gone over the syllabus and explained all the boring stuff about how the class works, that Jensen tunes out when he really shouldn't , he jumps right into class.
The class finds them avidly trying to keep up with the professor’s pace and write everything he says, until they're finally dismissed (Jared still insisting on calling Jensen 'Ja-danny', much to Jensen's frustration.)
They agree to hang out some time on the weekends and exchange numbers before heading their separate ways.
Jensen catches himself whistling and all but skipping home for lunch.
Jared
Jared pulls out his phone and looks at the contact that reads “Ja-Danny”, and has a picture of the man that Jared had managed to snap when he wasn't looking. Now if he could get one with his beautiful green eyes....
Okay, so, maybe it's a little creepy. Or, a lot creepy. But Jared embraced his inner-stalker a long time ago and, wow, Jensen's hotness is definitely worth his amaze-tastic stalker skills.
Amaze-tastic? Hmm.... I'm going to have to start using that one.
Jared smiles at his new word and walks back to his dorm happily.
His roommate, Chris, is already there.
“Hello, Chris!” Jared all but yells as he barges into the room as ostentatiously as possible, “did you have an amaze-tastic day? I had an amaze-tastic day!”
“Dude,” says Chris, raising an eyebrow at Jared, “did you seriously just say 'amaze-tastic'?”
“Yep! It's my new word. I like my new word. I think I should use it more.”
“Uggghhh!” Chris groans. “I know you're gay and all that, Jare, but seriously? You're not that gay. And I swear to god if I come home someday after you and there are rainbows on the wall and my clothes are all bedazzled, you're moving in with Chad.”
“Oh,” says Jared, putting a hand dramatically over his heart, “you wound me. But it's okay, because I met a super sexy guy today.”
“Again,” Chris starts, “I thought we talked about you telling me about your boyfriends-”
“He's not my boyfriend! Yet...” says Jared with a small smile. Then he sighs, and looks kinda downtrodden. “Besides, I don't even know if he's gay. But his name is Ja-Danny Cauthorn, but only I can call him that. You have to call him Danny. Anyways, that's his name and he's in my Psych class and he's got this really hot black hair that brings out his gorgeous green eyes.”
Chris is caught between being supportive (I mean, how often did Padalecki looks anything but totally happy?) and groaning, again, at the graphic description of this “hottie.”
So, he groans at the description first. “Seriously? We just went over this!”
“Ass,” Jared whines (a manly whine, mind you), and throws a pillow at Chris's head and laughing.
“Oh, you wanna go Padalecki? You're on!” says Chris.
“Bring it!”
Jared runs over to Chris's bed and grabs his pillow, since Chris has his and they jump around fighting like ten-year-old boys until they realize how late it has become.
Jared lays down to sleep, but is still wide awake long after Chris's snores start to fill the room.
What if Jensen isn't gay? What are the chances that in the middle of Texas you'll meet the perfect, funny, friggin' hot guy, and he's gay? Not too likely.
Jared knows that being gay in one of the most conservative states right along the bible-belt is hard. Sure, it's not like people ran around all the time committing hate-crimes, and Jared loves his state, but most older people tend to be conservative, so they aren't usually very accepting of gay people.
Jared knows from experience. His dad kicked him out of the house when he tried to come out and disowned him. And the sad thing is, he knows there are so many people like him out there and not all of them have parents like Chris's, who took Jared into the family until they both went off to college.
Jared had a huge college fund saved up, where all his money went and was working his ass off in school to get as many scholarships as possible. He wasn't going to let the Kane's pay one cent for his education. And in the end, between scholarships, his savings, and loans, he made it into UT with Chris. And the rest was history.
He's dated a couple guys. Had a couple one-night stands. But he's never fallen in love. He didn't think he could at this age and, despite being a pretty romantic person, had never believed in love at first sight.
He really hopes Danny is gay. He's known the guy for all of a few hours and already has fallen in love with him.
Chapter 2: http://nympha-fluminis.livejournal.com/6643.html#cutid1
Chapter 1:
“Dan! Danny! Daniel fucking Cauthorn!”
Jensen groans and turns back in his bed, pulling his pillow over his head to try and tune out his roommate, Misha.
But, of course, Misha grabs his blanket and pulls it off.
“Uggghhh,” he whines, a very manly whine, mind you, “Miisssha.”
“Daannnnyy,” Misha mimics, holding out the word.
“You're like my mother. She used to wake me up like that,” Jensen says, finally sitting up in bed and resting his head on his hands.
“Well, god bless the poor woman that had to do that everyday. She must have be a saint.”
“Haha, very funny Meesh,” Jensen says sarcastically.
“I know,” Misha responds, “Now, get you ass up and get dressed! We're gonna be late! Or, you are, anyways.”
“Fine! Fine! I get it! Shesh... some people,” Jensen grumbles, pulling himself out of bed and rummaging through his clothes, while Misha gets dressed on the other side of the room.
He eventually finds a shirt, some jeans, and UT sweatshirt that smells okay to wear over, even though it ever got below sixty or seventy degrees during August in Austin.
Jensen ducks into a corner of the room, behind a dresser where he knows Misha won’t see him change, and throws on his clothes as quickly as possible, hating not having layers of clothes on, no matter how short the time it is.
Misha has long ago gotten used to Jensen's weird quirk of always wearing long sleeves and jeans, and never changing where people could see him.
Jensen let Misha believe what ever he wanted. But he's just lucky he got Misha as roommate because he has as many weird quirks as Jensen, so he can't bother Jensen for his. He never asks about it. Just accepts that his friend is hunting for privacy in a place where there was no privacy, and lets him be.
It's always weird looking in the mirror and seeing black hair instead of dirty blonde. Even after four years of being Danny Cauthorn instead of Jensen Ackles, he still can't remember to respond to Danny sometimes or has gotten used to the minor changes in his appearance. He still hates that he has to hide his entire life from his best friend. Or, new best friend. He'd left behind all his other friends that he'd known since childhood in Richardson. The ones that mourned him and went to the funeral of Jensen Ackles because his “death” had to seem real.
“Well,” says Misha, suddenly appearing behind Jensen, where he is trying futilely to make his unruly hair sit somewhat nicely in front of the mirror, “if you're done primping, I'd like to go.”
“Jesus!” Jensen yells. “Scare the living shit out of a man why don't ya?”
“Well, I'm not exactly scaring the living shit out of a man. I'm scaring the living shit out of you,” Misha says, a small smirk on his face.
“Fuck you, Collins,” Jensen replies lovingly, while pulling his shoes on.
“I'm flattered, really, but I don't roll that way.”
Jensen rolls his eyes at his friend, before walking out the door.
***
Jensen and Misha continue joking with each other as they walked out of the dorm and across the campus to find their respective classes.
Ten minutes later Jensen's staring at his schedule, reading the room number and building of his first class for the ten-trillionth time, even though he has it memorized by now. Trying to find his class and hoping that he was in the right building. He's tempted to run back outside and check the number even when he knows it will say the exact same thing it did when he checked before walking in.
While he's carefully examining the piece of paper with the room he needs to find, he isn't paying attention to the people around him, and runs right smack dab into some guy.
“Ooomp,” Jensen grunts as he falls to the ground, all his papers and books scattering out from his backpack.
“Oh, shit, sorry man!” says the person Jensen had run into. “Here, let me help. Shit. Wow, I'm really sorry,” he repeats, while bending down to help Jensen gather his stuff and shove it into his bag.
“Thanks,” says Jensen quietly, after getting his stuff into his bag and standing back up.
He looks up at the guy he'd run into.... and up, and up, and up
He's a frickin' giant! Jensen has never considered himself short at a solid 6'1”, but damn, this guy makes him look like a child!
Then, Jensen notices his smile. He has an amazing smile. And pretty eyes...
Damn it, Jensen! What's the matter with you? Why would you even think that? You're not gay.
Well, maybe his mind was thinking all that. His dick on the other hand... well, that's another story.
“Jared,” says the man, extending his gigantic hand towards Jensen. Jensen's mind, which was apparently not cooperating or listening to him, just had to wonder if every part of Jared was gigantic.
Shit! The last thing I need is to start tenting in the middle of the hallway like some fifteen year old kid who's never seen any real action.
Jensen realizes that he's just been standing there while the guy, Jared, is waiting for him to introduce himself.
“Je-Danny,” says Jensen, in such a rush to make up for looking like an ass and leaving Jared hanging, that he almost said 'Jensen' and he's able to just correct himself, then reach out to shake Jared's hand.
“Jadanny?” asks Jared, Jensen's slip of the tongue not getting past him, with a quirked eyebrow.
“Danny,” says Jensen. “Just Danny.”
“Whatever you say Ja-Danny,” Jared says with a mischievous sparkle in his brown eyes.
Jensen scowls at Jared and he laughs.
“So, what's your class?”
“Psych 101 with,” Jensen looks at his schedule, “uh... Professor Greenwood.”
“Cool!” says Jared. “Me too!” His face lights up in a smile and his dimples come out. He looks like a fucking puppy-dog.
Again, with the weird analogies and thoughts about this very male person you just met Jensen! God! What's the matter with you?
As it turns out, Jensen and his amazing directional sense had managed to walk right past his classroom. But, despite the accident in the hallway and Jensen's inability to get up in the morning, Jared and Jensen walk in on time.
Jensen and Jared sit in the middle of the classroom, and after Professor Greenwood has vaguely gone over the syllabus and explained all the boring stuff about how the class works, that Jensen tunes out when he really shouldn't , he jumps right into class.
The class finds them avidly trying to keep up with the professor’s pace and write everything he says, until they're finally dismissed (Jared still insisting on calling Jensen 'Ja-danny', much to Jensen's frustration.)
They agree to hang out some time on the weekends and exchange numbers before heading their separate ways.
Jensen catches himself whistling and all but skipping home for lunch.
Jared
Jared pulls out his phone and looks at the contact that reads “Ja-Danny”, and has a picture of the man that Jared had managed to snap when he wasn't looking. Now if he could get one with his beautiful green eyes....
Okay, so, maybe it's a little creepy. Or, a lot creepy. But Jared embraced his inner-stalker a long time ago and, wow, Jensen's hotness is definitely worth his amaze-tastic stalker skills.
Amaze-tastic? Hmm.... I'm going to have to start using that one.
Jared smiles at his new word and walks back to his dorm happily.
His roommate, Chris, is already there.
“Hello, Chris!” Jared all but yells as he barges into the room as ostentatiously as possible, “did you have an amaze-tastic day? I had an amaze-tastic day!”
“Dude,” says Chris, raising an eyebrow at Jared, “did you seriously just say 'amaze-tastic'?”
“Yep! It's my new word. I like my new word. I think I should use it more.”
“Uggghhh!” Chris groans. “I know you're gay and all that, Jare, but seriously? You're not that gay. And I swear to god if I come home someday after you and there are rainbows on the wall and my clothes are all bedazzled, you're moving in with Chad.”
“Oh,” says Jared, putting a hand dramatically over his heart, “you wound me. But it's okay, because I met a super sexy guy today.”
“Again,” Chris starts, “I thought we talked about you telling me about your boyfriends-”
“He's not my boyfriend! Yet...” says Jared with a small smile. Then he sighs, and looks kinda downtrodden. “Besides, I don't even know if he's gay. But his name is Ja-Danny Cauthorn, but only I can call him that. You have to call him Danny. Anyways, that's his name and he's in my Psych class and he's got this really hot black hair that brings out his gorgeous green eyes.”
Chris is caught between being supportive (I mean, how often did Padalecki looks anything but totally happy?) and groaning, again, at the graphic description of this “hottie.”
So, he groans at the description first. “Seriously? We just went over this!”
“Ass,” Jared whines (a manly whine, mind you), and throws a pillow at Chris's head and laughing.
“Oh, you wanna go Padalecki? You're on!” says Chris.
“Bring it!”
Jared runs over to Chris's bed and grabs his pillow, since Chris has his and they jump around fighting like ten-year-old boys until they realize how late it has become.
Jared lays down to sleep, but is still wide awake long after Chris's snores start to fill the room.
What if Jensen isn't gay? What are the chances that in the middle of Texas you'll meet the perfect, funny, friggin' hot guy, and he's gay? Not too likely.
Jared knows that being gay in one of the most conservative states right along the bible-belt is hard. Sure, it's not like people ran around all the time committing hate-crimes, and Jared loves his state, but most older people tend to be conservative, so they aren't usually very accepting of gay people.
Jared knows from experience. His dad kicked him out of the house when he tried to come out and disowned him. And the sad thing is, he knows there are so many people like him out there and not all of them have parents like Chris's, who took Jared into the family until they both went off to college.
Jared had a huge college fund saved up, where all his money went and was working his ass off in school to get as many scholarships as possible. He wasn't going to let the Kane's pay one cent for his education. And in the end, between scholarships, his savings, and loans, he made it into UT with Chris. And the rest was history.
He's dated a couple guys. Had a couple one-night stands. But he's never fallen in love. He didn't think he could at this age and, despite being a pretty romantic person, had never believed in love at first sight.
He really hopes Danny is gay. He's known the guy for all of a few hours and already has fallen in love with him.
Chapter 2: http://nympha-fluminis.livejournal.com/6643.html#cutid1