Unjustified Insecurities
Unjustified Insecurities (Sequel to Justified Insecurities)
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Yunjae/Jaeho
Genre: AU!Romance/Drama
Summary: He had fallen for the person he thought he could never have, willing to pick up each broken piece and accept him wholeheartedly. Afraid that one day, this person will leave him for someone more capable and stronger... someone like him never deserves the right guy.
***
Yunho typed into the computer when the door jerked open, welcoming his scowling boyfriend holding a paper bag. “What’s wrong?” Yunho asked.
“My boss is being a total prick.” Jaejoong said irritably as he sat down on the chair before the desk. “Wouldn’t let me out for lunch, even though the place was basically empty and I was starving.”
“He relented and let you go?”
“Nope.” Jaejoong replied as he took out the two boxes from the bag.
Yunho furrowed his eyebrows. “If he didn’t let you go, then why are you here?
Jaejoong narrowed his eyes. “Don’t want me here? “ He placed his box back in the bag and rose to stand up. “I can leave-” Yunho immediately placed his hands over Jaejoong and pulled him back down.
“You know I always want you here.” Yunho replied shyly, Jaejoong smiled as he sat back down.
“Aw, I’m touched.” Jaejoong said mockingly, Yunho pouted as they both ate with light conversation that mostly consisted of Jaejoong’s teasing and Yunho making a fuss.
Jaejoong cleaned up the desk as he threw the boxes into the trash. He turned to head towards the door when Yunho called out to him. “Kiss?” Yunho asked hopefully, Jaejoong raised an eyebrow.
“I’ve spoiled you enough, don’t you think?” Yunho sulked as Jaejoong chuckled. He headed out the door when a man entered inside.
Yunho instantly straightened and composed himself. “You have the documents?” Yunho asked in a serious tone.
“At 2 o’clock sharp, as you asked, though it seems I may have interrupted something.” Yunho ignored him as he examined the documents. “So you like pretty boys.” The man commented. Yunho breathed in deeply, he was already missing his other colleague; unfortunately it was now his extended vacation time. Leaving him with this aggravating son-of-
“I’m surprised that a guy like that likes someone like you. I’d think he’d want someone manlier, more capable-”
“I think we’re done here, you can leave now.” Yunho said icily.
“Of course.” He sneered as he walked out of the office. Yunho fumed, it was only going to be for another two weeks. Just two weeks until he can get this guy out of his hair.
Yunho himself was usually a calm guy, often complimented for his positive persona. But this guy brought out the worst in him, especially when he brought in Jaejoong frequently in their conversation. Just the thought of someone even thinking of him in that way angered him, invoking a fear he thought had laid dormant.
He may have the money, looks and overall charisma, yet he’s still afraid that everything he has worked for doesn’t truly belong to him. Despite what the general people may think, he doesn’t consider himself good enough for Jaejoong. The rejection still lingered in his memory along with the pain he once felt from that because of it.
Jaejoong was once straight and dismissed the whole notion of being with him, being the sole reason for their falling out. However, Yunho remained persistent, he preferred being with Jaejoong, at least friendship wise, than never being with him at all. He forced himself on dates, hoping desperately that he could fall for someone else.
He never wanted to relive being separated from him again.
-
It was late at night when Yunho returned to their apartment, it was rather large but he could afford it. He sighed as he headed towards their bedroom and noted Jaejoong sleeping on the bed. He sat down and gazed at him, Jaejoong usually slept with his shirt off and even in the dark could he see the wounds from countless fights. The most prominent was that scar on his back. Even after all these years, it never fully healed; Yunho traced it with his fingers.
It was due to the accident back then, his parents had both been drunks and used to beat him constantly and were neglectful of him. He had often begged for Jaejoong to leave that place but he refused every time. Until one day he appeared in his doorstep, asking for help before he collapsed. Jaejoong never once explained how he got the scar, but Yunho had an idea. He chose since then to be his guardian, to protect him from anything. When the contact between him and his parents had been severed once and for all, Yunho felt great relief.
Yet Yunho could never truly forgive them, it was cause of them that Jaejoong had picked up the same habits early on. He had known Jaejoong since they were kids, and watched as Jaejoong strayed further away from the person he once was. Growing up completely lost and broken. He can’t help but resent anyone who dares to insult Jaejoong for his personality and attitude, because they never knew what he had been through or the trials he had faced. Jaejoong was still a good guy who needed guidance, he didn’t deserve the prejudgment against him.
Yunho laid down beside him, his fingers trailed down his arm. His best friend was always stronger in both strength and personality. Always testing the wrong sides of the law to see if he could get away with it. Doing anything to make him forget any pain, never daring to show weakness in front of anyone. He continued down that downward spiral, never once stopping until the day Yunho watched him through the bars of the jail cell.
Yunho pulled Jaejoong towards him and held him closely. Despite everything Jaejoong’s ever done, he fell for this self-proclaimed jerk.
Jaejoong only depended and trusted him, he willingly did everything to maintain their friendship, and against all odds, they were now together. He’s achieved this happiness that the quote ‘Too good to be true’ haunts him. He’s afraid that it will one day break, afraid that he’ll wake up and realize all these years were just a dream.
---
Yunho returned to work as usual, he wished he could just quit his job and stay home with Jaejoong. But the very man would likely force him back, with a few bruises for good measure. He glanced up at the computer monitor and smiled when he looked at the small picture of him and Jaejoong. Jaejoong himself hated the display but he relented in letting Yunho having at least that one keepsake compared to the entire desk being dedicated to him.
His happiness was short-lived when the door opened and the man he'd rather avoid entered. He handed more documents and started off with professional conversation, but as always, had to include personal talk.
“I honestly don’t see it.” Yunho didn’t look up as he continued. “I mean, I somehow doubt you’re that guy’s type. Certainly not mines.”
“I’m more than delighted to hear that news.” Yunho said, barely containing his disdain for the man who merely smiled in return.
“Maybe that guy just doesn’t realize who’s available. I think even I may be more his type. I’m sure I could even do a better job of satisfying him than you ever could.”
Yunho scowled, this guy really knew how to provoke him. Before he could retort the man left the office, leaving him to his own thoughts, almost right after Jaejoong entered.
Jaejoong raised an eyebrow, “Are you okay?” He asked with concern in his voice. Yunho looked up and smiled. “You were never good at forcing a smile Yunho.”
Yunho looked down; Jaejoong was right with that one. He didn’t say anything as Jaejoong came around the desk and laid his hand on his shoulder. “Was it that guy?” Yunho furrowed his eyebrows. Jaejoong shrugged his shoulders. “I’ve been waiting outside your office a few times, you should remember that door of yours isn’t sound-proof. And I’ll say right now, he’s an idiot if he even thinks I’d like someone like him. I feel sorry for anyone who does actually.” He shuddered at the thought.
Yunho chuckled meekly as he grabbed Jaejoong’s hand and held it towards him. “Yunho, it’s alright.” Jaejoong told him. It was ironic really, Jaejoong had only displayed concern for him at the rarest of times, but it was comforting when he did. “What are you worried about anyway? That’d I leave you and go for him? I already know my taste is weird for picking you, but being with someone like him makes me a complete idiot.”
Yunho laughed again, the concern Jaejoong showed was being overtaken by his attitude. “I know.” Yunho replied. “It’s just that… there are always other guys...”
Jaejoong shook his head. “First of all, let’s get this straight. I am not gay.” Yunho raised an eyebrow as he glanced up at the man. “I turned for you and only you. I am no way interested in those other guys. Got it?” He huffed. “Besides, I’ve gotten all the sleeping around out of my system back in high school.” Jaejoong explained. “I do have some loyalties.”
Yunho smiled and pulled Jaejoong into a tight hug, who fought to be released. “Let me go before I hurt you.” He threatened.
“I don’t care if you hurt me.” He held him even tighter. “I won’t let you let go, you’re not allowed to leave me, ever.”
“Mmm, looks who’s suddenly talking big. I can choose to leave when I want to-“
“No. Even if you run away, I’ll follow you and win you back.” Yunho’s voice was muffled as he leaned against Jaejoong.
“Dare stalk me and I’ll kill you.” Jaejoong warned as he lightly smacked Yunho on the head. “Now get ready, we have to visit your parents and I promised I'd help Auntie cook dinner.” Yunho reluctantly let go and gathered his things, he suddenly snapped his fingers when he remembered something. He opened the drawer and pulled out a little box.
Jaejoong widened his eyes. “If that’s for me, return it.” Jaejoong stated, Yunho pouted.
“But I got this for you-“
“Return it! I have enough things from you. Its no wonder everyone thinks I’m a gold-digger.”
“But I love spoiling you! You don’t even wear the clothes I buy you.”
“I’m good with a ten dollar t-shirt compared to three hundred dollars. Besides, I have a job, I can buy my own clothes.”
Yunho mumbled disappointingly. “You don’t even have to, I can pay-”
“Again, gold-digger status. So no.” Jaejoong stated. “And you’re right, I don’t have to. Especially since you hide all the bills from me and refuse to let me pay. Would it kill you to let me pay just once?”
“Yes.” Yunho answered easily, Jaejoong narrowed his eyes and punched him on the shoulder.
“You just have to make my life difficult.” Jaejoong replied. “Hurry or you’re walking to the house.” Yunho hastily packed the rest and followed him out. Yunho reached for Jaejoong’s hand; though he pulled away repeatedly Yunho persisted until Jaejoong gave in. Yunho smiled as he forced a quick kiss on his hand, Jaejoong blushed and withdrew his hand. Yunho rushed to catch up with him and grinned when Jaejoong scowled at him.
He would take every taunt and abuse from Jaejoong. It didn’t matter, as long as Jaejoong was always with him, and that alone was enough.
- Sequel to Justified Insecurities -
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Yunjae/Jaeho
Genre: AU!Romance/Drama
Summary: He had fallen for the person he thought he could never have, willing to pick up each broken piece and accept him wholeheartedly. Afraid that one day, this person will leave him for someone more capable and stronger... someone like him never deserves the right guy.
***
Yunho typed into the computer when the door jerked open, welcoming his scowling boyfriend holding a paper bag. “What’s wrong?” Yunho asked.
“My boss is being a total prick.” Jaejoong said irritably as he sat down on the chair before the desk. “Wouldn’t let me out for lunch, even though the place was basically empty and I was starving.”
“He relented and let you go?”
“Nope.” Jaejoong replied as he took out the two boxes from the bag.
Yunho furrowed his eyebrows. “If he didn’t let you go, then why are you here?
Jaejoong narrowed his eyes. “Don’t want me here? “ He placed his box back in the bag and rose to stand up. “I can leave-” Yunho immediately placed his hands over Jaejoong and pulled him back down.
“You know I always want you here.” Yunho replied shyly, Jaejoong smiled as he sat back down.
“Aw, I’m touched.” Jaejoong said mockingly, Yunho pouted as they both ate with light conversation that mostly consisted of Jaejoong’s teasing and Yunho making a fuss.
Jaejoong cleaned up the desk as he threw the boxes into the trash. He turned to head towards the door when Yunho called out to him. “Kiss?” Yunho asked hopefully, Jaejoong raised an eyebrow.
“I’ve spoiled you enough, don’t you think?” Yunho sulked as Jaejoong chuckled. He headed out the door when a man entered inside.
Yunho instantly straightened and composed himself. “You have the documents?” Yunho asked in a serious tone.
“At 2 o’clock sharp, as you asked, though it seems I may have interrupted something.” Yunho ignored him as he examined the documents. “So you like pretty boys.” The man commented. Yunho breathed in deeply, he was already missing his other colleague; unfortunately it was now his extended vacation time. Leaving him with this aggravating son-of-
“I’m surprised that a guy like that likes someone like you. I’d think he’d want someone manlier, more capable-”
“I think we’re done here, you can leave now.” Yunho said icily.
“Of course.” He sneered as he walked out of the office. Yunho fumed, it was only going to be for another two weeks. Just two weeks until he can get this guy out of his hair.
Yunho himself was usually a calm guy, often complimented for his positive persona. But this guy brought out the worst in him, especially when he brought in Jaejoong frequently in their conversation. Just the thought of someone even thinking of him in that way angered him, invoking a fear he thought had laid dormant.
He may have the money, looks and overall charisma, yet he’s still afraid that everything he has worked for doesn’t truly belong to him. Despite what the general people may think, he doesn’t consider himself good enough for Jaejoong. The rejection still lingered in his memory along with the pain he once felt from that because of it.
Jaejoong was once straight and dismissed the whole notion of being with him, being the sole reason for their falling out. However, Yunho remained persistent, he preferred being with Jaejoong, at least friendship wise, than never being with him at all. He forced himself on dates, hoping desperately that he could fall for someone else.
He never wanted to relive being separated from him again.
-
It was late at night when Yunho returned to their apartment, it was rather large but he could afford it. He sighed as he headed towards their bedroom and noted Jaejoong sleeping on the bed. He sat down and gazed at him, Jaejoong usually slept with his shirt off and even in the dark could he see the wounds from countless fights. The most prominent was that scar on his back. Even after all these years, it never fully healed; Yunho traced it with his fingers.
It was due to the accident back then, his parents had both been drunks and used to beat him constantly and were neglectful of him. He had often begged for Jaejoong to leave that place but he refused every time. Until one day he appeared in his doorstep, asking for help before he collapsed. Jaejoong never once explained how he got the scar, but Yunho had an idea. He chose since then to be his guardian, to protect him from anything. When the contact between him and his parents had been severed once and for all, Yunho felt great relief.
Yet Yunho could never truly forgive them, it was cause of them that Jaejoong had picked up the same habits early on. He had known Jaejoong since they were kids, and watched as Jaejoong strayed further away from the person he once was. Growing up completely lost and broken. He can’t help but resent anyone who dares to insult Jaejoong for his personality and attitude, because they never knew what he had been through or the trials he had faced. Jaejoong was still a good guy who needed guidance, he didn’t deserve the prejudgment against him.
Yunho laid down beside him, his fingers trailed down his arm. His best friend was always stronger in both strength and personality. Always testing the wrong sides of the law to see if he could get away with it. Doing anything to make him forget any pain, never daring to show weakness in front of anyone. He continued down that downward spiral, never once stopping until the day Yunho watched him through the bars of the jail cell.
Yunho pulled Jaejoong towards him and held him closely. Despite everything Jaejoong’s ever done, he fell for this self-proclaimed jerk.
Jaejoong only depended and trusted him, he willingly did everything to maintain their friendship, and against all odds, they were now together. He’s achieved this happiness that the quote ‘Too good to be true’ haunts him. He’s afraid that it will one day break, afraid that he’ll wake up and realize all these years were just a dream.
---
Yunho returned to work as usual, he wished he could just quit his job and stay home with Jaejoong. But the very man would likely force him back, with a few bruises for good measure. He glanced up at the computer monitor and smiled when he looked at the small picture of him and Jaejoong. Jaejoong himself hated the display but he relented in letting Yunho having at least that one keepsake compared to the entire desk being dedicated to him.
His happiness was short-lived when the door opened and the man he'd rather avoid entered. He handed more documents and started off with professional conversation, but as always, had to include personal talk.
“I honestly don’t see it.” Yunho didn’t look up as he continued. “I mean, I somehow doubt you’re that guy’s type. Certainly not mines.”
“I’m more than delighted to hear that news.” Yunho said, barely containing his disdain for the man who merely smiled in return.
“Maybe that guy just doesn’t realize who’s available. I think even I may be more his type. I’m sure I could even do a better job of satisfying him than you ever could.”
Yunho scowled, this guy really knew how to provoke him. Before he could retort the man left the office, leaving him to his own thoughts, almost right after Jaejoong entered.
Jaejoong raised an eyebrow, “Are you okay?” He asked with concern in his voice. Yunho looked up and smiled. “You were never good at forcing a smile Yunho.”
Yunho looked down; Jaejoong was right with that one. He didn’t say anything as Jaejoong came around the desk and laid his hand on his shoulder. “Was it that guy?” Yunho furrowed his eyebrows. Jaejoong shrugged his shoulders. “I’ve been waiting outside your office a few times, you should remember that door of yours isn’t sound-proof. And I’ll say right now, he’s an idiot if he even thinks I’d like someone like him. I feel sorry for anyone who does actually.” He shuddered at the thought.
Yunho chuckled meekly as he grabbed Jaejoong’s hand and held it towards him. “Yunho, it’s alright.” Jaejoong told him. It was ironic really, Jaejoong had only displayed concern for him at the rarest of times, but it was comforting when he did. “What are you worried about anyway? That’d I leave you and go for him? I already know my taste is weird for picking you, but being with someone like him makes me a complete idiot.”
Yunho laughed again, the concern Jaejoong showed was being overtaken by his attitude. “I know.” Yunho replied. “It’s just that… there are always other guys...”
Jaejoong shook his head. “First of all, let’s get this straight. I am not gay.” Yunho raised an eyebrow as he glanced up at the man. “I turned for you and only you. I am no way interested in those other guys. Got it?” He huffed. “Besides, I’ve gotten all the sleeping around out of my system back in high school.” Jaejoong explained. “I do have some loyalties.”
Yunho smiled and pulled Jaejoong into a tight hug, who fought to be released. “Let me go before I hurt you.” He threatened.
“I don’t care if you hurt me.” He held him even tighter. “I won’t let you let go, you’re not allowed to leave me, ever.”
“Mmm, looks who’s suddenly talking big. I can choose to leave when I want to-“
“No. Even if you run away, I’ll follow you and win you back.” Yunho’s voice was muffled as he leaned against Jaejoong.
“Dare stalk me and I’ll kill you.” Jaejoong warned as he lightly smacked Yunho on the head. “Now get ready, we have to visit your parents and I promised I'd help Auntie cook dinner.” Yunho reluctantly let go and gathered his things, he suddenly snapped his fingers when he remembered something. He opened the drawer and pulled out a little box.
Jaejoong widened his eyes. “If that’s for me, return it.” Jaejoong stated, Yunho pouted.
“But I got this for you-“
“Return it! I have enough things from you. Its no wonder everyone thinks I’m a gold-digger.”
“But I love spoiling you! You don’t even wear the clothes I buy you.”
“I’m good with a ten dollar t-shirt compared to three hundred dollars. Besides, I have a job, I can buy my own clothes.”
Yunho mumbled disappointingly. “You don’t even have to, I can pay-”
“Again, gold-digger status. So no.” Jaejoong stated. “And you’re right, I don’t have to. Especially since you hide all the bills from me and refuse to let me pay. Would it kill you to let me pay just once?”
“Yes.” Yunho answered easily, Jaejoong narrowed his eyes and punched him on the shoulder.
“You just have to make my life difficult.” Jaejoong replied. “Hurry or you’re walking to the house.” Yunho hastily packed the rest and followed him out. Yunho reached for Jaejoong’s hand; though he pulled away repeatedly Yunho persisted until Jaejoong gave in. Yunho smiled as he forced a quick kiss on his hand, Jaejoong blushed and withdrew his hand. Yunho rushed to catch up with him and grinned when Jaejoong scowled at him.
He would take every taunt and abuse from Jaejoong. It didn’t matter, as long as Jaejoong was always with him, and that alone was enough.
- Sequel to Justified Insecurities -