[ILC15] Embedded Pasts
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Kangteuk
Genre: AU!Romance, Minor!Sci-fi, Minor!Drama, Minor!Comedy
Disclaimer: I don't own any SuJu member.
IL/Pairing Assigner: rssj1314 & shadowcrawler12
[Challenge][Y][FF] Summary: He finally came to know of the world outside, yet wary of the day that he'd have to answer those avoided questions. Of the day when those answers might push away the only person he needed, the only person he trusts.
-
Fingers over slick surfaces, lips over hot skin, eyes fluttering open and closed, and sounds derived of all possible causes; it was a long night, a long, long night.
Yet the grips of pleasure long vanished as the pain intensified. Clenched fists tearing at the fabric sheets, he yelled for it to stop.
Leeteuk collapsed against the headboard of the bed, wincing from the small impact as he panted labored breaths.
"I'm sorry." Kangin said. "I hurt you again, didn't I?"
Leeteuk peeked through exhausted eyelids, in constant wonderment how the other was always able to look energetic and refreshed, despite the often long lengths of intimacy. "How are you never tired?"
Kangin gave the same smile as he always had the one that showed Leeteuk that it should suffice for an answer, even if it had done nothing to explain his many questions.
-
Kangin walked outside in those early morning hours, the dark skies embracing overhead as he walked from the small house to the wooden docks beside the lake. He glanced back at the house whose lights remained completely off, glancing at a particular window where he had momentarily left the other man.
"Do I tell him?" He asked out loud, as if the skies would answer his question. He recalled a gruff voice reminding him that it should never be told, it wasn't understandable. The mutual feelings he felt in the beginning, oblivious to how the outside world truly worked. Only taking information and experiences relayed to him through movies and books, his questions often avoided, never once able to experience it on his own.
He could never recall the day he was created, given a name, given his purpose to serve the man who made him. Yet always maintained a distance, as if his creator could never allow him to be close, even in his final years. Even after he had passed on, Kangin was left abandoned at home, where no one knew he lived, much less existed.
He could do nothing else but walk amongst those walls, lost and always alone.
The day when the door opened to his home, he was surprised, but instantly hid himself as he was trained to do whenever others had arrived.
"I don't think that old man left much." Kibum uttered, glancing around at the shabbiness of the house.
"We still have to see, his will left everything he owned to us." Leeteuk said, lifting some newspapers from the dusty table.
"I don't see why, uncle never seemed to like us."
Kangin heard their names in passing and the ongoing conversation; it was obvious that while neither of them had really known their uncle, Leeteuk tried to be polite in handling his belongings as Kibum merely gathered them up.
He was too caught up in hearing the commotion downstairs, that he forgot to keep track of his movements; and when Kibum caught eye of a tall shadow on the wall, he cautiously peeked up the stairs and met Kangin's stare.
Kibum screamed at the sudden stranger, reaching instantly for the nearest weapon he could find, and hoped beyond anything that a dusty mop could do justice and hold off this potential attacker.
He couldn't simply run now. Exposed, he walked down the stairs, noting the intense fear in both their faces. "Who are you?" He asked calmly.
"No one, we're no one!"
"You're called...Kibum." He acknowledged in a strained voice, it had been months since he last spoke, the man widened his eyes.
"Dear God, he's a serial killer."
"And you're Leeteuk." Kangin said, glancing at the just as frightened man behind him. "Were you related to him?"
"Explain yourself first." Kibum bit out, stealthily reaching for the house's phone.
"The line's dead." Kangin explained; the man hadn't listened as he tried to dial three numbers, then throwing the phone across the room, confirming his comment.
He chuckled at the memory, it took a lot longer to calm the both of them, and while they had interrogated him with the mop still aimed at him to the point of exhaustion, they seemed only mildly satisfied. Kangin made sure to keep his answers concise and simple, never once referring to his true past, and easily giving the one his creator instilled in him.
"Don't tell me... You were living alone here all these months?" Leeteuk asked tentatively.
"Yes." Kangin answered.
Leeteuk widened his eyes, "All alone?" Kangin nodded. He watched as Leeteuk gave another look around the house, cringing slightly when he looked at his brother.
Kibum narrowed his eyes, knowing that look. "We are not taking him with us. This is exactly how every horror movie starts." He said in a hushed tone.
Leeteuk grabbed his arm and pulled him outside, unaware that Kangin could hear the two of them perfectly. They continued their quiet argument until Leeteuk walked inside with a reluctant Kibum behind him, the decision made final.
-
Leeteuk peered open his eyes, staring around the darkened room for any hint of an outline, realizing soon after that he was alone. He casually dressed himself as he walked down the stairs, ignoring, with a light blush, the sharp pain that occasionally shot through his lower back.
With another quick look around, he figured the other had went about his random nightly walks, one he took upon himself to do as often as he could. As he looked out the small window of the kitchen, he nearly jumped at the sound of his brother's yawn.
"Don't do that." He warned, his hand over his startled heart.
"Please tell me you're making food." Leeteuk could only shake his head as the other aimed for the fridge. "What are you doing up?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Because Kangin usually knocks you out by now." Leeteuk's face turned a bright red as he nearly lost his balance from that blunt statement, his grip on the marble counter the only thing keeping him stable.
He tried to change the subject. "You don't seem to suspect him as much as before, finally gave up those ideas of yours?"
"Do I think he's a trained assassin in hiding? Yes, I still do. But then I realized the benefit of having one in our house."
Leeteuk shook his head, remembering an early conversation between the two of them that carried an entirely different tune.
"Not that we can explain where he came from." Kibum said idly back then, at the time, it had only been a few weeks after Kangin had moved in.
"Does it matter where he came from? Uncle adopted him and we should take care of him." Leeteuk argued back as he rinsed the plates in the sink. "We shouldn't pry if he isn't ready to tell us." All the while, Kibum arched an eyebrow and scoffed.
"You like him."
Leeteuk nearly dropped the plate, before he could deny his brother's allegations, the other cut him off.
"You," He pointed. “are a horrible liar. I bet you were relieved to know he isn't related to us."
The older brother could only sigh.
He hated the fool he made of himself, acting nervous, fumbling over things in his hands, covering his eyes whenever he accidentally came across him in the shower. Although, he wouldn't dare tell them that they were far from accidental.
Kangin was almost childlike, in the sense that everything was new to him. He took it upon himself to act as a guide, teaching and answering his questions without much concern. He found it endearing how the other took to him, following him unconsciously, sometimes too nervous if the other had been away too long. And while some had pointed out that it seemed like a brotherly relationship, Leeteuk never took to that comparison well.
He recalled sulking to it once he heard it again, attempted to distract himself by retying the rope of the wooden docks to a small boat. He heard footsteps behind him and assumed it was Kangin; he turned around to ask for help when the other suddenly kissed him on the cheek, barely missing his lips.
The effect Kangin wanted was not the way he had pictured it.
Especially as he helped pull Leeteuk out of the water, patting his back as Leeteuk coughed from the unintentional drowning.
"I probably shouldn't have done that." Kangin said out loud, Leeteuk tried to clear his throat as he looked up at Kangin's regretful expression. He ran his fingers through his wet hair, looking down at the wooden floor.
"You can." Leeteuk said quietly as he hid his smile behind his hand. "Just... Don't catch me off-guard."
-
Leeteuk walked outside of the house, his hands behind his back as he quietly walked on the docks, correctly guessing that the other would be there.
He tried to remain as quiet-like as he could, and nearly pounced on the other's back. In disappointment, the man he attempted to surprise remained completely unfazed, again.
"What are you out here for?" Leeteuk asked, his arms hung over Kangin's shoulders.
"Thinking."
"And you couldn't do that back in bed?" He asked tentatively, his arms attempting to reach around the other man's torso. "Every time I ask you that question, it's always so cryptic. I can never decipher them."
Kangin gave a strangled smile as Leeteuk swayed against him. Leeteuk thought over his words, attempting to sound assuring.
"You're entitled to a few secrets I guess. I can't expect you to fulfill my curiosity every time, can I?"
He was unaware of the passing guilt that overwhelmed the other. His thoughts filled with the words encoded to him, as bounded by law, and still he found he wanted to break them. Yet he was too afraid to, the gnawing insecurities worsening as their relationship became deeper.
"You'll hate me if I tell you." Kangin explained lowly. "You'll be disgusted if you knew."
"I told you to stop saying things like that." Leeteuk warned as he buried himself in the man's sweater.
"But you will hate me."
He watched Leeteuk walked around in front, standing firmly before him. "Have you ever hurt anyone?"
"No." Kangin said blankly.
"Have you ever committed a crime of any sort?" Kangin shook his head. "Have you ever killed anyone?"
"No."
Leeteuk pursed his lips, "That blows Kibum's theory right out of the water." He looked straight into his eyes, "As far as I'm concerned, nothing you did would make me hate you."
"It's not what I did... More of-" What he was, Kangin finished dejectedly in his thoughts.
"I don't care." He insisted as he hung his arms around his neck. "If I can accept my brother, I can accept you."
Kangin gave a stiff smile, closing his eyes as he pressed his forehead against his, even now he could hear the other's heartbeats accelerate despite the time they've spent together. He then pulled Leeteuk into a tight hug, making sure to control his strength as his arms encased the other, cradling him in his shaking embrace.
He couldn't tell the other yet his past, but in due time he decided he would. Only when he was prepared, when he was ready to give up this embedded secret.
And as he felt the other man lean against his chest, resting his eyes as he allowed himself to be held, he felt assured that he would be accepted despite the warnings. That he could listen to his words and know the honesty behind him, the clenching feeling around his heart relaxing when the day would finally come.
The day when someone would accept him for what he was.
☆ rssj1314's Kangteuk ☆
- ILC14 [ Haemin] ☆ ILC16 [HenKyu] -
-
A/N: It's official, I fail at deadlines .-.
Side note, I'm not sure why I thought of this. Maybe it's residue of me missing KYLE XY... that was canceled too soon in my opinion >< And I always liked the stranded man who holds onto/only opens with a single person. The best example expressed was this quote from Dang Ou, a amnesic character from Prince Who Turns into A Frog: "But to me, you're the only person I know. If I'm not with you, I'm afraid I don't even know where to go." (The scene at 5:51 ^^ ) Love that drama, Ming Dao's innocent smile ^^ and yes, I still listen to 183 Club music :)
Also... I made Kibum into a wuss, I make him cool too many times >o So I decided to change it otherwise :)
Cross posted at kangteuk ^^
Pairing: Kangteuk
Genre: AU!Romance, Minor!Sci-fi, Minor!Drama, Minor!Comedy
Disclaimer: I don't own any SuJu member.
IL/Pairing Assigner: rssj1314 & shadowcrawler12
[Challenge][Y][FF] Summary: He finally came to know of the world outside, yet wary of the day that he'd have to answer those avoided questions. Of the day when those answers might push away the only person he needed, the only person he trusts.
-
Fingers over slick surfaces, lips over hot skin, eyes fluttering open and closed, and sounds derived of all possible causes; it was a long night, a long, long night.
Yet the grips of pleasure long vanished as the pain intensified. Clenched fists tearing at the fabric sheets, he yelled for it to stop.
Leeteuk collapsed against the headboard of the bed, wincing from the small impact as he panted labored breaths.
"I'm sorry." Kangin said. "I hurt you again, didn't I?"
Leeteuk peeked through exhausted eyelids, in constant wonderment how the other was always able to look energetic and refreshed, despite the often long lengths of intimacy. "How are you never tired?"
Kangin gave the same smile as he always had the one that showed Leeteuk that it should suffice for an answer, even if it had done nothing to explain his many questions.
-
Kangin walked outside in those early morning hours, the dark skies embracing overhead as he walked from the small house to the wooden docks beside the lake. He glanced back at the house whose lights remained completely off, glancing at a particular window where he had momentarily left the other man.
"Do I tell him?" He asked out loud, as if the skies would answer his question. He recalled a gruff voice reminding him that it should never be told, it wasn't understandable. The mutual feelings he felt in the beginning, oblivious to how the outside world truly worked. Only taking information and experiences relayed to him through movies and books, his questions often avoided, never once able to experience it on his own.
He could never recall the day he was created, given a name, given his purpose to serve the man who made him. Yet always maintained a distance, as if his creator could never allow him to be close, even in his final years. Even after he had passed on, Kangin was left abandoned at home, where no one knew he lived, much less existed.
He could do nothing else but walk amongst those walls, lost and always alone.
The day when the door opened to his home, he was surprised, but instantly hid himself as he was trained to do whenever others had arrived.
"I don't think that old man left much." Kibum uttered, glancing around at the shabbiness of the house.
"We still have to see, his will left everything he owned to us." Leeteuk said, lifting some newspapers from the dusty table.
"I don't see why, uncle never seemed to like us."
Kangin heard their names in passing and the ongoing conversation; it was obvious that while neither of them had really known their uncle, Leeteuk tried to be polite in handling his belongings as Kibum merely gathered them up.
He was too caught up in hearing the commotion downstairs, that he forgot to keep track of his movements; and when Kibum caught eye of a tall shadow on the wall, he cautiously peeked up the stairs and met Kangin's stare.
Kibum screamed at the sudden stranger, reaching instantly for the nearest weapon he could find, and hoped beyond anything that a dusty mop could do justice and hold off this potential attacker.
He couldn't simply run now. Exposed, he walked down the stairs, noting the intense fear in both their faces. "Who are you?" He asked calmly.
"No one, we're no one!"
"You're called...Kibum." He acknowledged in a strained voice, it had been months since he last spoke, the man widened his eyes.
"Dear God, he's a serial killer."
"And you're Leeteuk." Kangin said, glancing at the just as frightened man behind him. "Were you related to him?"
"Explain yourself first." Kibum bit out, stealthily reaching for the house's phone.
"The line's dead." Kangin explained; the man hadn't listened as he tried to dial three numbers, then throwing the phone across the room, confirming his comment.
He chuckled at the memory, it took a lot longer to calm the both of them, and while they had interrogated him with the mop still aimed at him to the point of exhaustion, they seemed only mildly satisfied. Kangin made sure to keep his answers concise and simple, never once referring to his true past, and easily giving the one his creator instilled in him.
"Don't tell me... You were living alone here all these months?" Leeteuk asked tentatively.
"Yes." Kangin answered.
Leeteuk widened his eyes, "All alone?" Kangin nodded. He watched as Leeteuk gave another look around the house, cringing slightly when he looked at his brother.
Kibum narrowed his eyes, knowing that look. "We are not taking him with us. This is exactly how every horror movie starts." He said in a hushed tone.
Leeteuk grabbed his arm and pulled him outside, unaware that Kangin could hear the two of them perfectly. They continued their quiet argument until Leeteuk walked inside with a reluctant Kibum behind him, the decision made final.
-
Leeteuk peered open his eyes, staring around the darkened room for any hint of an outline, realizing soon after that he was alone. He casually dressed himself as he walked down the stairs, ignoring, with a light blush, the sharp pain that occasionally shot through his lower back.
With another quick look around, he figured the other had went about his random nightly walks, one he took upon himself to do as often as he could. As he looked out the small window of the kitchen, he nearly jumped at the sound of his brother's yawn.
"Don't do that." He warned, his hand over his startled heart.
"Please tell me you're making food." Leeteuk could only shake his head as the other aimed for the fridge. "What are you doing up?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Because Kangin usually knocks you out by now." Leeteuk's face turned a bright red as he nearly lost his balance from that blunt statement, his grip on the marble counter the only thing keeping him stable.
He tried to change the subject. "You don't seem to suspect him as much as before, finally gave up those ideas of yours?"
"Do I think he's a trained assassin in hiding? Yes, I still do. But then I realized the benefit of having one in our house."
Leeteuk shook his head, remembering an early conversation between the two of them that carried an entirely different tune.
"Not that we can explain where he came from." Kibum said idly back then, at the time, it had only been a few weeks after Kangin had moved in.
"Does it matter where he came from? Uncle adopted him and we should take care of him." Leeteuk argued back as he rinsed the plates in the sink. "We shouldn't pry if he isn't ready to tell us." All the while, Kibum arched an eyebrow and scoffed.
"You like him."
Leeteuk nearly dropped the plate, before he could deny his brother's allegations, the other cut him off.
"You," He pointed. “are a horrible liar. I bet you were relieved to know he isn't related to us."
The older brother could only sigh.
He hated the fool he made of himself, acting nervous, fumbling over things in his hands, covering his eyes whenever he accidentally came across him in the shower. Although, he wouldn't dare tell them that they were far from accidental.
Kangin was almost childlike, in the sense that everything was new to him. He took it upon himself to act as a guide, teaching and answering his questions without much concern. He found it endearing how the other took to him, following him unconsciously, sometimes too nervous if the other had been away too long. And while some had pointed out that it seemed like a brotherly relationship, Leeteuk never took to that comparison well.
He recalled sulking to it once he heard it again, attempted to distract himself by retying the rope of the wooden docks to a small boat. He heard footsteps behind him and assumed it was Kangin; he turned around to ask for help when the other suddenly kissed him on the cheek, barely missing his lips.
The effect Kangin wanted was not the way he had pictured it.
Especially as he helped pull Leeteuk out of the water, patting his back as Leeteuk coughed from the unintentional drowning.
"I probably shouldn't have done that." Kangin said out loud, Leeteuk tried to clear his throat as he looked up at Kangin's regretful expression. He ran his fingers through his wet hair, looking down at the wooden floor.
"You can." Leeteuk said quietly as he hid his smile behind his hand. "Just... Don't catch me off-guard."
-
Leeteuk walked outside of the house, his hands behind his back as he quietly walked on the docks, correctly guessing that the other would be there.
He tried to remain as quiet-like as he could, and nearly pounced on the other's back. In disappointment, the man he attempted to surprise remained completely unfazed, again.
"What are you out here for?" Leeteuk asked, his arms hung over Kangin's shoulders.
"Thinking."
"And you couldn't do that back in bed?" He asked tentatively, his arms attempting to reach around the other man's torso. "Every time I ask you that question, it's always so cryptic. I can never decipher them."
Kangin gave a strangled smile as Leeteuk swayed against him. Leeteuk thought over his words, attempting to sound assuring.
"You're entitled to a few secrets I guess. I can't expect you to fulfill my curiosity every time, can I?"
He was unaware of the passing guilt that overwhelmed the other. His thoughts filled with the words encoded to him, as bounded by law, and still he found he wanted to break them. Yet he was too afraid to, the gnawing insecurities worsening as their relationship became deeper.
"You'll hate me if I tell you." Kangin explained lowly. "You'll be disgusted if you knew."
"I told you to stop saying things like that." Leeteuk warned as he buried himself in the man's sweater.
"But you will hate me."
He watched Leeteuk walked around in front, standing firmly before him. "Have you ever hurt anyone?"
"No." Kangin said blankly.
"Have you ever committed a crime of any sort?" Kangin shook his head. "Have you ever killed anyone?"
"No."
Leeteuk pursed his lips, "That blows Kibum's theory right out of the water." He looked straight into his eyes, "As far as I'm concerned, nothing you did would make me hate you."
"It's not what I did... More of-" What he was, Kangin finished dejectedly in his thoughts.
"I don't care." He insisted as he hung his arms around his neck. "If I can accept my brother, I can accept you."
Kangin gave a stiff smile, closing his eyes as he pressed his forehead against his, even now he could hear the other's heartbeats accelerate despite the time they've spent together. He then pulled Leeteuk into a tight hug, making sure to control his strength as his arms encased the other, cradling him in his shaking embrace.
He couldn't tell the other yet his past, but in due time he decided he would. Only when he was prepared, when he was ready to give up this embedded secret.
And as he felt the other man lean against his chest, resting his eyes as he allowed himself to be held, he felt assured that he would be accepted despite the warnings. That he could listen to his words and know the honesty behind him, the clenching feeling around his heart relaxing when the day would finally come.
The day when someone would accept him for what he was.
☆ rssj1314's Kangteuk ☆
- ILC14 [ Haemin] ☆ ILC16 [HenKyu] -
-
A/N: It's official, I fail at deadlines .-.
Side note, I'm not sure why I thought of this. Maybe it's residue of me missing KYLE XY... that was canceled too soon in my opinion >< And I always liked the stranded man who holds onto/only opens with a single person. The best example expressed was this quote from Dang Ou, a amnesic character from Prince Who Turns into A Frog: "But to me, you're the only person I know. If I'm not with you, I'm afraid I don't even know where to go." (The scene at 5:51 ^^ ) Love that drama, Ming Dao's innocent smile ^^ and yes, I still listen to 183 Club music :)
Also... I made Kibum into a wuss, I make him cool too many times >o So I decided to change it otherwise :)
Cross posted at kangteuk ^^