Still in Hide wants to kill himself mode.

[obliviousaspect]

Now why is that? I'm like all talk and no action.

All I seem to use this journal for is for venting so people outside on all my more positive websites do not get fed up with my bullshit.

Okay so I got up. I couldn't sleep good last night, I guess because I was off schedule. Kept tossing and turning, my whole body was throbbing and my heart was acting

Comments

[jess_85]

Aww!

I'm really sorry to hear you had trouble sleeping last night. I had trouble sleeping myself, but I didn't have any strange dreams like that. Not that I can recall, at least. Most of the time when I have dreams like that, I don't think anything about them because I think they are too strange to actually mean anything. But I'm talking to you about it all now :P So we'll just see how this convo goes. lol.

But in the meantime, just try not to have anymore bad dreams like that, k?' *hugs* you much. I hope you feel better, my friend. Take it easy :)

[scapula]

I dont know much about translating dreams, but it seems you're afraid because of your condition of anyone you dont know. And like anyone with a connection to their mother, you're afraid of losing her. Not just because she's your nurse, but because you have a bond even tho she drives you insane..

I think the boy represents your intense fear of the unknown, and the asian version -- is your intense fear of others of your own kind -- and what they might perceive you as.

It almost is like a night-tare, like the kind you percieve as a child -- the kinda that haunt you for years. Yet, it sometimes has an instilled feeling of peace with the boy at times -- like you want to trust people when they say that they can do things for you -- but you're afraid of them because you dont know what life is like..

it's probably something to do with your spirit-situation maybe, like your body screaming at you it's more afraid than you think you are. Yet you have no way of telling it things will move on?

[rikuhayakawa]

You really need to start taking things easy. Stop pushing yourself so hard, because if you don't, you won't have to try and kill your self. Your body will shut down, and do it for you.
Also if you have an infection in your blood, you would be crazy not to go to a doctor and have that checked out.