RP LOG with fraserphoenix | Overdue news
[Follows THIS, THIS and THIS]
Mathieu scratched at his stomach as he walked the halls of the mansion. He was wearing just a pair of jeans after leaving Emmeline talking on her phone to her agent. He was glad to be back around her again, but there was only so much talk of fashion that he could take. As much as he loved beautiful things, he'd rather just admire Emmeline's body, but she had given him that 'I'm busy, go away' look. Now that there was a break in their reunion, Mathieu knew it was time to talk to his godfather.
He padded softly towards Blaise's wing of the palace, and opened the doors as he poked his head in. There was no sign of Blaise yet, but as Mathieu moved in deeper, he could hear moans. Female moans. It wasn't Juliette he found with Blaise though, and Mathieu realised he was interrupting feeding time. He couldn't help but smirk though as he admired the fine female form lying back on the bed. Not that he was about to let his cock stray, though. Just his fangs. "Need a serviette there, Blaise?"
The thing about Kindred, was that between each other, there was very little modesty. Naked, and pretty much in the climatic throes of passion for feeding, Blaise didn't miss a beat as he took his fill from the nurse he had employed for Rory. He couldn't help it if there was an opening there to kill two birds with one stone, and she was more than willing to cater to him. It meant Blaise didn't have to go out hunting for sustenance, and Rory was sleeping under Juliette's watch again. Juliette had quietly admitted to Blaise that she knew it might be invasive, but watching Rory sleep was the only time she felt like she wasn't completely doing something wrong with the Scot. It was something Blaise more than understood, and he was relieved because it meant he didn't have to be a constant presence around Rory to ensure his health and safety. Of course, when he had no need for the nurse...
Blaise pulled back, licking his lips as he turned to look at Mathieu over his shoulder, his eyes silver as he smirked at his godson. He looked back down at the naked nurse sprawled beneath him, murmuring his gratitude in French before trailing his tongue softly over the wounds on her throat. He pressed a few more small kissed to her jaw and then pulled back, moving to sit on the side of the bed as her reached for his bathrobe. "Mon fils," he greeted him. "Comment ça va?"
Mathieu reached up to rub the back of his neck with his hand in a very human gesture of doubt, not really sure how he was supposed to answer that question. As happy as it made him to know that Emmeline wanted him, that she was willing to bond with him, to marry him, he was still saddened by the death of his father. And he wasn't even sure how he was supposed to begin to break the news to Blaise. For a moment it didn't look like the nurse was going to leave, but after a moment she gathered up her clothes and left. Mathieu slipped his hand into the pocket of his jeans, and pulled out a gold pocket watch that had belonged to his father. He brought it over to Blaise, and offered it to him. "I know it's not much, but he wanted you to have it. It meant a lot to him." Mathieu wet his lips before he sat down on the bed next to Blaise. "He died. Two weeks ago..."
Of course, Blaise had been confused initially at the item Mathieu was offering up to him, until he continued to speak. At first, all Blaise could do was look at the younger Kindred in disbelief. Two weeks, and he had heard no word? Not even a note? He felt a chill creep down his spine as his eyes shifted from Mathieu's face to the watch. Very little in this world actually rendered Blaise speechless, but this was definitely one of those times. He was still pulsing all over from the intense feed, and the renewed energy washing through him, but this had grounded him hard. "Why did you not come sooner?" he finally asked quietly. All Mathieu's father wanted as a promise from Blaise was to look after his boy if he wasn't able to, but this felt like some sort of failure even at the first hurdle.
"I had heard you weren't well. I didn't want to bother you. I also didn't want to bother Emmeline, and we've already had that argument. I know it was stupid. Even as I listen to myself now, I realise I just should have told you both. I'm sorry, godfather. I didn't want to burden either of you." Mathieu ran his hand over his head and dropped it into his lap as his shoulders slumped. "My Dad died. I haven't been able to think clearly since. All I can think about is the fact that he's no longer around. He's been there my whole life... My whole afterlife."
Blaise set the watch down onto his nightstand and then put his arm around Mathieu's shoulders, hugging him softly. "You listen to me closely. There is not a single act you could partake in that would ever deign you a burden to me, or to any of your family. Do you understand? This has, granted, been anticipated for some time, but that does not dilute the grief or the loss. He is your father, he will forever be your father, whether he walks this earth or not. Now you have to begin to live without him, and that is not going to be easy, Mathieu. It is going to be one of the hardest things you ever face, and that is never something you should have felt you should be facing on your own. I am never too busy or too indisposed for you. Even ailing, you could have been here with me. It is where you belong now."
Mathieu nodded as he listened, even if that same gnawing feeling of emptiness had started up. With Emmeline it was easy to push it to the side. With Blaise, it wasn't. Blaise had known his father, Blaise was his Sire. Blaise really was his family now. Mathieu looked up at meet Blaise's gaze again. "Merci, Blaise. I just wanted to try and... I don't know. Cope without him. It's been so hard to know that this was going to come, and now that it's happened I still can't really digest it. My Dad's gone. He never even got to know that me and Emmeline--" Mathieu broke off before he got another guilty look, and cleared his throat. "I miss him."
"Of course you do. That will not go away, mon amour. I wish I could promise you that it will, but that would be unfair. It will ease, but you will always miss him. You were very close to him and you will not experience that again. But you do not need to cope without him. You need to grieve and face this, but you do not need to be alone whilst you do. You must stay here. You can be alone when you need, but still know we are here. Where have you been? What have you been doing?" Blaise asked in concern, though he could imagine it was just a whole lot of reckless behaviour and sex with faceless women. Anything to distract from the loss.
Mathieu raised his eyebrows a little as if he knew Blaise's own thoughts had already answered that question. "Trying not to need Emmeline. No one is a proper substitute for her. Mostly I've just stayed in the place I'd bought him. I don't know if I should sell it, or not. I have no idea what to even do with his things. I need to get back to work as well. I know you will need me if you're still feeling unwell. Are you still feeling unwell? Emmeline doesn't seem to have much faith in the blonde hanging around here. And I realise I have not been so good with the segues, but there is something I need to ask you."
With a faint smirk, Blaise nodded. "Indeed, if she needed a grave, that is what would be on it," he joked, giving Mathieu a soft squeeze. "You know, you do not have to sell it. It is close by, you could keep it as an investment. Or perhaps someone can stay there who needs residence..." He narrowed his eyes slightly in thought, wondering if Rory would consider remaining in Paris for Buffy if the baby turned out to be his. "What I am saying is, however, that there is no rush. Non, I do not need you back at work. Others will step in. I need you to take time to grieve and find your feet without your father. My condition is tolerable. Perhaps not of the strength I require, but I have yet to find a solution for that. Emmeline does not have much faith in anyone. Buffy is harmless to us. She intends us no ill-will. I would not have her in my home if I knew otherwise. I have known from the get-go that she is no threat to us, just perhaps to others she misunderstands. She means a lot to me and whatever happens, I do wish her to remain in my life on some level and I would be appreciative if that was understood to make it easier for me." He looked at Mathieu, eyebrows raising curiously. "Go ahead."
Mathieu gave a slight chuckle as he relaxed in his godfather's embrace. "No doubt. You know of someone that needs a residence?" he asked as he watched Blaise's face. It was easy enough to see when he was in thought about something if you knew him well enough. "So she does mean something to you? In that case I am more than willing to understand. As much as I love Emmeline, I do not share her wish to tear this Buffy apart just for living. If she means something to you, then she means something to me. She doesn't yet make you happy though, does she?" Mathieu braced his hands against his knees and made sure he was holding Blaise's gaze. "I asked Emmeline to marry me. I want her, and only her. There was even a discussion of becoming mates, but she wants the whole package. She wants both. Only I can't propose properly until I get your permission. I want your permission to marry her, Blaise."
"Perhaps," Blaise agreed with a nod. "Rory Buchanan. I am hoping he might see way to remaining in Paris, however he is a Scotsman through and through. It will be like convincing, well, Emmeline to give up make up and jewellery. Considering the situation, though, he would be safer here. There has been murmurings his connection to Kindred might not be born just of his best friend's Embrace, but I am yet to seek confirmation of this from him. He has been unwell and sleeping extensively. I do not wish to bother him while he is recuperating. She does mean something to me, I am just yet to figure out what exactly. Just when I think I have it figured out, something always happens to raise doubt and uncertainty. I am very drained with the whole situation and feel at a loss right now. She does not make me unhappy, but I struggle in the scenario. Where things will lie remains to be seen."
But when Mathieu continued, Blaise's eyebrows shot up in complete surprise. This was unexpected, despite the easy jokes about the connection between Emmeline and Mathieu. He wasn't sure they would ever relinquish to each other. "May I ask what caused the change of heart?"
Mathieu hummed in thought before he gave a nod. "If he wants to stay, the place is his. Although if you truly believe that he would be safer here, then shouldn't he just stay with you? He'd have your protection completely. Does it look at if he's healing okay now? I heard there was some trouble when he first woke up. Brujah influence?" Mathieu pointed a finger at Blaise. "That's how Emmeline got under my skin. Of course we were more concerned with getting down to our skin most of the time. Have you even been with her yet? Perhaps you need to experience her in the flesh."
Mathieu gave a nod. "Oui, of course. My father's death. All I could think about was going to Emmeline, to being with Emmeline. She's all I've ever wanted, and I suppose this just made me realise that it's time I actually went after her."
"For now, he must stay here. He is too weak to protect himself. However, at the end of the day, he is a Hunter and a very determined one at that. He has extensive Kindred knowledge. He will be an asset to our realm. Though, there is an awkward situation at the moment, so a lot is up in the air. I am just trying to forward plan. He is a solo flyer. I think staying would bear on the fact he still has his own environment to exist in." Blaise nodded slowly. "He is, now that he has stopped trying to fight against the injuries. Indeed, Brujah, and based on a lot of inner anger so it was a disaster. Sergeant Finn earned his head being smashed into a wall because of it. It was getting dangerous, to himself as well as others. I cannot tolerate her touch right now."
He watched Mathieu's face intently, his eyes tracing over every tiny feature as he scrutinised him. This was a moment he had contemplated since Emmeline had began showing signs of connecting to the boy. Though now it was here, Blaise had to tread carefully. "Tell me, what will you offer her," he requested.
"Cannot tolerate her touch? That is quite serious, parrain. Is there anything I can do for you? If you trust him that much, then he can definitely have the house. I'm sure you'll still find some way to keep an eye on him no doubt. I hope Sergeant Finn is alright. It's been a little while since I saw him, but he's not completely horrible for a military man. Have there been any other attacks, or it really was centred on this Rory?"
Mathieu didn't feel paranoid when he realised he was under Blaise's scrutiny. He didn't expect any less. "Everything I am, everything I have. I love her wholly, Blaise. I will worship her, but I will not expect her to submit to me. I know her better than that. I won't stray, my cock will be hers and hers alone. Truth is she is the only woman I could ever be faithful to. She is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, and I am protective of that. However, I know she will not give up her job. Just like I would not expect her to stop feeding."
Blaise smirked slightly and shook his head. "Non, mon amour. Unless you are a miracle worker, there is nothing anyone can do at this juncture. The situation has gotten quite difficult even for me to cope with. I am barely beginning to scratch the surface of it all. Sexual relations with her are, unfortunately, not on the cards at this point. Sergeant Finn is... Buffy's ex. So, oui, he is still priceless in his job and role, but again, yet more complications. There have possibly been others, but I do not believe so, non. Very different in their style and signature, and near impossible to link them. The one on Rory seems to pointed and intended. The others, mere reckless overindulgence."
"You realise the enormity and importance of mating, I assume." It was more of a comment, though he still had Mathieu's gaze locked intently. "It is never something to be taken lightly. You are grieving. Are you certain this is not a knee-jerk reaction to the sensation of loneliness and loss?"
Mathieu held his hand up. "It's an offer I had to make. I can't not try and help my godfather if he needs it. And now, I understand even more why it's complicated. I don't envy you right now. Especially not when I manage to get territorial over Emmeline when she feeds on someone. I know I'm terrible, and hypocritical, but I can't help it. I don't want anyone else giving her love, or trying to take her from me. I don't want her attentions anywhere but on me. However, I know that she needs the men she feeds on to adore her. And they've been dealt with?"
Mathieu gave a nod. "Of course I do, parrain. And no, it is not. It really is because I have realised that I want Emmeline, and Emmeline alone. I always have."
"You are still so young, mon fils. I know you do not believe that, but you are. You will come to lose that jealousy. You can see Emmeline with her prey. She takes them and discards when they are no longer of use to her. If they begin to fall for her, she loses interest. The thrill is gone. You do not have anything to worry about. But perhaps something you need to think about working more on before you do something like mate with her," Blaise suggested gently. "The days and weeks, even perhaps months, in the wake of mating, you will be extremely sensitive and aware of each other's feelings and emotions. Basing that on jealousy, it could drive you crazy when she must feed. They have, and must learn more self-control. Rory's attackers, however, still remain at large."
Mathieu smirked a little. "I do understand it. Of course I do. And I'm starting to get better at it, but I haven't seen her for a long time. It's easy to fall back into the jealousy when I think about everyone she's been with while in New York. Maybe it really is better to consider the mating further, but I still want to marry her. You haven't given me your permission yet. We can get married first, then try the mating. I realise your relationship with Juliette is different, so you probably never had to deal with the jealousy factor. I'm willing to wait, but I still want to be able to propose to her."
"She is beautiful. That beauty should be shared and admired by others, like a stunning rose. But if everyone took a single petal from that rose to keep for themselves, it would die and be no more. Only one person gets to have the rose all to themselves so it can forever maintain its beauty." With a small smile, Blaise pointed at Mathieu. "But people are never going to cease wanting to admire it. Where you are a priceless Ventrue worth more than your weight, Emmeline is the epitome of Toreador. You both need to work to thrive. You will find your niche together, but it will be trial and error. Non, non, I dealt with jealousy as to Juliette extensively. Lacking approval of men she wishes to favour, and vice versa. Mateship is telling each other that you are taking each other wholly. There will always be jealousy. Control, mon amour. That is the key. With Kindred, it is always the key. You have my permission to marry her, of course. But discuss mating with her further. There is no going back on mating, but death."
"I guess I'm still struggling with the control side of things. That's why I love Emmeline. I don't need to be in control with her because she knows who I am. She knows what I am. There's no holding back, just getting lost in each other. She's always going to be admired, especially given what she does. She is out in the public eye constantly, but I want that rose to be mine. I can't help it, Blaise. I have never loved anyone like I love her." Mathieu finally smiled, his eyes lighting up. "Merci, parrain. I will never be able to thank you enough for this. Of course I will discuss mating further. I'm not about to do anything that would ruin things between us, or hurt her."
Blaise nodded slowly as he listened. "However, your grief and mourning for your father. No more putting it aside, non," he directed. "It will gradually bite away inside you and it is a basis for breeding uncontrollable things like anger and resentment that turn into horrific things like attacking innocent people when you cannot control them. Perhaps you will find being on your own easier to cope with it, but let Emmeline take care of you. She loves you, it will be natural instinct to want to. I realise those words coming out of my mouth are hypocritical, before you say anything, but my scenario is completely different. Too many years experience not to know better."
Mathieu nodded as he turned to look at where Blaise had set down the watch that had belonged to his father. He had carried it on him ever since he had been Mathieu's age, and he was fairly certain that his father had known Blaise for that long as well. "I want her to. I just didn't want to ask it of her in case it was too personal. I know better now. She more than taught me my lesson. I'm just waiting for her to finish with a business call before I go back there. That doesn't mean you're any less deserving of being taken care of, parrain. Hypocritical, but unnecessary. As nice as that woman in here just now was, she will not be a substitute for what you truly crave."
"I have no doubts she will slap you down if you try that again," Blaise agreed with a nod. "You should visit with Rory. He has no one to really just chat to, on a male level, so to speak. He could be a good friend to you. I know how you are, you are not easy at trusting to make friends and companions beyond it being for sexual need. He is... an interesting person. Not so much backwards in coming forward, in any sense. And that, mon amour, is something I do understand. I have been craving it for sometime now. I just wish I could find it without so much pain."
Mathieu shook his head slightly. "Just like I'm sure my father would have wanted my life to have not come at the cost of experiencing such pain. I was lucky to have had a chance at a new life, but I still had the accident. It was not what he imagined for me. I realise you've had more than your fair share of pain, godfather, but sometimes going through the pain is worth it for the prize at the end. I am forever indebted to you for giving me my life back, and to be honest, the accident was worth it. I love being Kindred. My father at least understood that in the end. Just like he loved you, and I think he was growing to love Emmeline. Hm, if you think that then perhaps I will go and see him. He certainly sounds interesting."
"I am not sure it is worth it," Blaise admitted. "I have been given very little but confusion to base my decision on. Even more confusion now. Buffy is pregnant, and there are two possible fathers. I am not sure having her in my world is going to be of benefit to either of us. Even before this, things were confusing. Sometimes people just know when they meet the right person for them. I have not felt that with Buffy. Indeed, you should. I believe he might wish to climb the walls when he is awake. He is very similar to you, had much heartache of his own. He may be someone who understands your situation."
Mathieu let out a long whistle before he just started to laugh in disbelief. "She's what?! Okay, I take it back. I'm not sure I can approve of her anymore. I also do not envy your position, parrain. You are more than welcome to your complicated situation. I think I'd be sick from it, too. If you have not felt it with Buffy, then just let her go. You do not need to waste your time on her." Mathieu nodded. "I cannot blame him for that. I will do anything to save him from the boredom that comes with being stuck in one place."
Blaise shook his head in amusement. "If only life was so easy, mon fils. Between you all under this roof, I believe I am going to go even more crazy. There is also Rory's friend, Airlie. Toreador Childer, and Buffy's best friend, Xander. Rory's brother has come to Paris, but they are estranged, which is again more complications. He also has a Kindred lover and they're members of Britians MI6. Believe me, if I could find a sound way to handle all this, I would be doing it. Besides myself, Rory has not had much to do with male Kindred, or indeed other Ventrue. You will be good for each other. Same age, essentially."
Mathieu got up to stretch his legs, and scratched his stomach again when he realised that he was starting to feel a little peckish. His fangs descended as he thought about going back to Emmeline with a meal to share. He just had to work out who. He hid his fangs again as he turned back to look at Blaise. "I leave you alone for a few months, and this is the mess you get into? I really can't wrap my head around it all just yet. There just suddenly seems to be a lot of human-Kindred relationships popping up. Are you trying to set me up on a Man Date, Blaise?"
"I have been within it for months and I still cannont wrap my head around it, so if you work out a formula, share it with me. Merci. That, however, is an inaccurate assessment. They are all around us. This is just a time they are more in our world than usual." Blaise smirked, standing himself to tie the sash on his robe at his hip before he rubbed his hand over his jaw. "Eat your heart out. Just do not eat him. Do not even think about touching him to feed on him. I forbid it. He has been drained too many times, and he does not wish it. My senses are already all over the place. I am trusting you in his presence, mon amour. I trust you to protect him as I would."
Mathieu gave a slight bow at Blaise's orders. "Bien sur, parrain. I will not feed on him, nor shall I touch him. I shall only protect him, and talk to him. Besides, you know that my tastes do not always extend to men. I only make exceptions when Emmeline is involved. Yes, you're right. They are all around, they really are just more prominent in our world right now. It's easy to forget there's more outside of this city. I cannot imagine leaving France right now. I realise my family are American, but my Dad died here. We made this place our home."
Blaise gave a nod. "Oui, I do. But he is crawling in Kindred signature, it might be a temptation, no matter what he is sporting in his pants. It will be a good test of control for you," he decided. "You know, you are always welcome here. To live. As long as you wish. If you feel the urge to return, we would understand, but you will always be important to me, both personally and professionally. Having said that, I do not envy you one bit for taking Emmeline as your bride. You are going to have your work cut out for you in the near future, I do believe," he added, smirking.
"Why, is she pregnant?" Mathieu asked with a smirk of his own before he held his hands up. "Bad joke. Je suis desole. I would like nothing more than to stay here, and I have every intention of staying for at least a little while. This is Emmeline's home as well, and for the most part wherever she is, I will be. You always did enjoy testing me. I'm sure that's why I'm the Ventrue I am today, parrain." Mathieu moved over to Blaise and kissed him on both cheeks. "I really am sorry I took so long to come and see you."
"Non, just Emmeline," Blaise returned, unphased. "She will likely make a pregnant woman look like an angel. Juliette would love to see you, too. We have been missing you. Perhaps we can have a family gathering at some juncture. The key to being a true Ventrue is to be true to oneself first. You have alway had that in abundance, mon amour. Do not ever change that. It is okay how you initially reacted, just do not stay away anymore. There is no need. Life here is very different now to how it has been, but it is still your home. Your Dad's memory will always be a large part of me."
Mathieu smiled at him. "And for that, I am grateful. He loved you very much, just as I know you cared about him very much. Where is Juliette anyway? I half expected to see her glued to your side considering your condition. A family gathering sounds like a plan. Maybe after I give Emmeline the ring. Do you think you could arrange for a jeweller to bring a collection over? I don't really feel like facing any sort of shopping right now."
"She is watching over Rory. They were... they could have been lovers, but it turned bad. Juliette was part of the reason Rory was where he was when he got attacked. Now he is wary about furthering things with her. Again, another difficult situation with no real obvious solution. He perhaps could have been good for her, but she misjudged his loyalty on some level. It is a shame, because he is a good person." Blaise pushed his fingers through his hair. "I will have a representative from Cartier send over their finest. You will know when you see it what is perfect for her."
"I already made her promise that if we got married, then I was to be trusted with picking the ring. I want it to be my choice for her, not something she tells me to buy. I don't need to be the submissive one either. I am her equal, and I really do have excellent taste. Of course Cartier is still the best. I am sorry to hear about Juliette and Rory. Perhaps all this mess can be sorted out soon. For all you know, my sheer awesomeness will cancel out any shit, and everything will start to work."
Blaise ran his finger along his lips in thought. "I went to a party with him once. The original Monsieur Cartier, before he made anything of himself. She would not want it if she had to select it herself, I believe. She has fine taste, but this is symbolic of so much more. Of course you have excellent taste, you are Ventrue. Nothing but the finest. Well, there you go. Ventrue optimism at its best," he added with a laugh.
Mathieu did another bow, but this one had a lot more theatricality to it. "I am your godson, Blaise. One of us has to have optimism. May as well be me even when I'm knee-deep in grief. Is there anyone you haven't been to a party with?"
Blaise was still smirking knowingly at his godson. "See Jaquelynne regarding Cartier, and perhaps she can point you in the direction of a meal. Then when you see Emmeline next, you can have a sound conversation with her rather than devouring each other in fits of passion. It is amazing how much you can visit when you just simply talk to your lover. Not everything needs to be done naked, mon fils," he told him in amusement.
Word Count | 5,485
Mathieu scratched at his stomach as he walked the halls of the mansion. He was wearing just a pair of jeans after leaving Emmeline talking on her phone to her agent. He was glad to be back around her again, but there was only so much talk of fashion that he could take. As much as he loved beautiful things, he'd rather just admire Emmeline's body, but she had given him that 'I'm busy, go away' look. Now that there was a break in their reunion, Mathieu knew it was time to talk to his godfather.
He padded softly towards Blaise's wing of the palace, and opened the doors as he poked his head in. There was no sign of Blaise yet, but as Mathieu moved in deeper, he could hear moans. Female moans. It wasn't Juliette he found with Blaise though, and Mathieu realised he was interrupting feeding time. He couldn't help but smirk though as he admired the fine female form lying back on the bed. Not that he was about to let his cock stray, though. Just his fangs. "Need a serviette there, Blaise?"
The thing about Kindred, was that between each other, there was very little modesty. Naked, and pretty much in the climatic throes of passion for feeding, Blaise didn't miss a beat as he took his fill from the nurse he had employed for Rory. He couldn't help it if there was an opening there to kill two birds with one stone, and she was more than willing to cater to him. It meant Blaise didn't have to go out hunting for sustenance, and Rory was sleeping under Juliette's watch again. Juliette had quietly admitted to Blaise that she knew it might be invasive, but watching Rory sleep was the only time she felt like she wasn't completely doing something wrong with the Scot. It was something Blaise more than understood, and he was relieved because it meant he didn't have to be a constant presence around Rory to ensure his health and safety. Of course, when he had no need for the nurse...
Blaise pulled back, licking his lips as he turned to look at Mathieu over his shoulder, his eyes silver as he smirked at his godson. He looked back down at the naked nurse sprawled beneath him, murmuring his gratitude in French before trailing his tongue softly over the wounds on her throat. He pressed a few more small kissed to her jaw and then pulled back, moving to sit on the side of the bed as her reached for his bathrobe. "Mon fils," he greeted him. "Comment ça va?"
Mathieu reached up to rub the back of his neck with his hand in a very human gesture of doubt, not really sure how he was supposed to answer that question. As happy as it made him to know that Emmeline wanted him, that she was willing to bond with him, to marry him, he was still saddened by the death of his father. And he wasn't even sure how he was supposed to begin to break the news to Blaise. For a moment it didn't look like the nurse was going to leave, but after a moment she gathered up her clothes and left. Mathieu slipped his hand into the pocket of his jeans, and pulled out a gold pocket watch that had belonged to his father. He brought it over to Blaise, and offered it to him. "I know it's not much, but he wanted you to have it. It meant a lot to him." Mathieu wet his lips before he sat down on the bed next to Blaise. "He died. Two weeks ago..."
Of course, Blaise had been confused initially at the item Mathieu was offering up to him, until he continued to speak. At first, all Blaise could do was look at the younger Kindred in disbelief. Two weeks, and he had heard no word? Not even a note? He felt a chill creep down his spine as his eyes shifted from Mathieu's face to the watch. Very little in this world actually rendered Blaise speechless, but this was definitely one of those times. He was still pulsing all over from the intense feed, and the renewed energy washing through him, but this had grounded him hard. "Why did you not come sooner?" he finally asked quietly. All Mathieu's father wanted as a promise from Blaise was to look after his boy if he wasn't able to, but this felt like some sort of failure even at the first hurdle.
"I had heard you weren't well. I didn't want to bother you. I also didn't want to bother Emmeline, and we've already had that argument. I know it was stupid. Even as I listen to myself now, I realise I just should have told you both. I'm sorry, godfather. I didn't want to burden either of you." Mathieu ran his hand over his head and dropped it into his lap as his shoulders slumped. "My Dad died. I haven't been able to think clearly since. All I can think about is the fact that he's no longer around. He's been there my whole life... My whole afterlife."
Blaise set the watch down onto his nightstand and then put his arm around Mathieu's shoulders, hugging him softly. "You listen to me closely. There is not a single act you could partake in that would ever deign you a burden to me, or to any of your family. Do you understand? This has, granted, been anticipated for some time, but that does not dilute the grief or the loss. He is your father, he will forever be your father, whether he walks this earth or not. Now you have to begin to live without him, and that is not going to be easy, Mathieu. It is going to be one of the hardest things you ever face, and that is never something you should have felt you should be facing on your own. I am never too busy or too indisposed for you. Even ailing, you could have been here with me. It is where you belong now."
Mathieu nodded as he listened, even if that same gnawing feeling of emptiness had started up. With Emmeline it was easy to push it to the side. With Blaise, it wasn't. Blaise had known his father, Blaise was his Sire. Blaise really was his family now. Mathieu looked up at meet Blaise's gaze again. "Merci, Blaise. I just wanted to try and... I don't know. Cope without him. It's been so hard to know that this was going to come, and now that it's happened I still can't really digest it. My Dad's gone. He never even got to know that me and Emmeline--" Mathieu broke off before he got another guilty look, and cleared his throat. "I miss him."
"Of course you do. That will not go away, mon amour. I wish I could promise you that it will, but that would be unfair. It will ease, but you will always miss him. You were very close to him and you will not experience that again. But you do not need to cope without him. You need to grieve and face this, but you do not need to be alone whilst you do. You must stay here. You can be alone when you need, but still know we are here. Where have you been? What have you been doing?" Blaise asked in concern, though he could imagine it was just a whole lot of reckless behaviour and sex with faceless women. Anything to distract from the loss.
Mathieu raised his eyebrows a little as if he knew Blaise's own thoughts had already answered that question. "Trying not to need Emmeline. No one is a proper substitute for her. Mostly I've just stayed in the place I'd bought him. I don't know if I should sell it, or not. I have no idea what to even do with his things. I need to get back to work as well. I know you will need me if you're still feeling unwell. Are you still feeling unwell? Emmeline doesn't seem to have much faith in the blonde hanging around here. And I realise I have not been so good with the segues, but there is something I need to ask you."
With a faint smirk, Blaise nodded. "Indeed, if she needed a grave, that is what would be on it," he joked, giving Mathieu a soft squeeze. "You know, you do not have to sell it. It is close by, you could keep it as an investment. Or perhaps someone can stay there who needs residence..." He narrowed his eyes slightly in thought, wondering if Rory would consider remaining in Paris for Buffy if the baby turned out to be his. "What I am saying is, however, that there is no rush. Non, I do not need you back at work. Others will step in. I need you to take time to grieve and find your feet without your father. My condition is tolerable. Perhaps not of the strength I require, but I have yet to find a solution for that. Emmeline does not have much faith in anyone. Buffy is harmless to us. She intends us no ill-will. I would not have her in my home if I knew otherwise. I have known from the get-go that she is no threat to us, just perhaps to others she misunderstands. She means a lot to me and whatever happens, I do wish her to remain in my life on some level and I would be appreciative if that was understood to make it easier for me." He looked at Mathieu, eyebrows raising curiously. "Go ahead."
Mathieu gave a slight chuckle as he relaxed in his godfather's embrace. "No doubt. You know of someone that needs a residence?" he asked as he watched Blaise's face. It was easy enough to see when he was in thought about something if you knew him well enough. "So she does mean something to you? In that case I am more than willing to understand. As much as I love Emmeline, I do not share her wish to tear this Buffy apart just for living. If she means something to you, then she means something to me. She doesn't yet make you happy though, does she?" Mathieu braced his hands against his knees and made sure he was holding Blaise's gaze. "I asked Emmeline to marry me. I want her, and only her. There was even a discussion of becoming mates, but she wants the whole package. She wants both. Only I can't propose properly until I get your permission. I want your permission to marry her, Blaise."
"Perhaps," Blaise agreed with a nod. "Rory Buchanan. I am hoping he might see way to remaining in Paris, however he is a Scotsman through and through. It will be like convincing, well, Emmeline to give up make up and jewellery. Considering the situation, though, he would be safer here. There has been murmurings his connection to Kindred might not be born just of his best friend's Embrace, but I am yet to seek confirmation of this from him. He has been unwell and sleeping extensively. I do not wish to bother him while he is recuperating. She does mean something to me, I am just yet to figure out what exactly. Just when I think I have it figured out, something always happens to raise doubt and uncertainty. I am very drained with the whole situation and feel at a loss right now. She does not make me unhappy, but I struggle in the scenario. Where things will lie remains to be seen."
But when Mathieu continued, Blaise's eyebrows shot up in complete surprise. This was unexpected, despite the easy jokes about the connection between Emmeline and Mathieu. He wasn't sure they would ever relinquish to each other. "May I ask what caused the change of heart?"
Mathieu hummed in thought before he gave a nod. "If he wants to stay, the place is his. Although if you truly believe that he would be safer here, then shouldn't he just stay with you? He'd have your protection completely. Does it look at if he's healing okay now? I heard there was some trouble when he first woke up. Brujah influence?" Mathieu pointed a finger at Blaise. "That's how Emmeline got under my skin. Of course we were more concerned with getting down to our skin most of the time. Have you even been with her yet? Perhaps you need to experience her in the flesh."
Mathieu gave a nod. "Oui, of course. My father's death. All I could think about was going to Emmeline, to being with Emmeline. She's all I've ever wanted, and I suppose this just made me realise that it's time I actually went after her."
"For now, he must stay here. He is too weak to protect himself. However, at the end of the day, he is a Hunter and a very determined one at that. He has extensive Kindred knowledge. He will be an asset to our realm. Though, there is an awkward situation at the moment, so a lot is up in the air. I am just trying to forward plan. He is a solo flyer. I think staying would bear on the fact he still has his own environment to exist in." Blaise nodded slowly. "He is, now that he has stopped trying to fight against the injuries. Indeed, Brujah, and based on a lot of inner anger so it was a disaster. Sergeant Finn earned his head being smashed into a wall because of it. It was getting dangerous, to himself as well as others. I cannot tolerate her touch right now."
He watched Mathieu's face intently, his eyes tracing over every tiny feature as he scrutinised him. This was a moment he had contemplated since Emmeline had began showing signs of connecting to the boy. Though now it was here, Blaise had to tread carefully. "Tell me, what will you offer her," he requested.
"Cannot tolerate her touch? That is quite serious, parrain. Is there anything I can do for you? If you trust him that much, then he can definitely have the house. I'm sure you'll still find some way to keep an eye on him no doubt. I hope Sergeant Finn is alright. It's been a little while since I saw him, but he's not completely horrible for a military man. Have there been any other attacks, or it really was centred on this Rory?"
Mathieu didn't feel paranoid when he realised he was under Blaise's scrutiny. He didn't expect any less. "Everything I am, everything I have. I love her wholly, Blaise. I will worship her, but I will not expect her to submit to me. I know her better than that. I won't stray, my cock will be hers and hers alone. Truth is she is the only woman I could ever be faithful to. She is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, and I am protective of that. However, I know she will not give up her job. Just like I would not expect her to stop feeding."
Blaise smirked slightly and shook his head. "Non, mon amour. Unless you are a miracle worker, there is nothing anyone can do at this juncture. The situation has gotten quite difficult even for me to cope with. I am barely beginning to scratch the surface of it all. Sexual relations with her are, unfortunately, not on the cards at this point. Sergeant Finn is... Buffy's ex. So, oui, he is still priceless in his job and role, but again, yet more complications. There have possibly been others, but I do not believe so, non. Very different in their style and signature, and near impossible to link them. The one on Rory seems to pointed and intended. The others, mere reckless overindulgence."
"You realise the enormity and importance of mating, I assume." It was more of a comment, though he still had Mathieu's gaze locked intently. "It is never something to be taken lightly. You are grieving. Are you certain this is not a knee-jerk reaction to the sensation of loneliness and loss?"
Mathieu held his hand up. "It's an offer I had to make. I can't not try and help my godfather if he needs it. And now, I understand even more why it's complicated. I don't envy you right now. Especially not when I manage to get territorial over Emmeline when she feeds on someone. I know I'm terrible, and hypocritical, but I can't help it. I don't want anyone else giving her love, or trying to take her from me. I don't want her attentions anywhere but on me. However, I know that she needs the men she feeds on to adore her. And they've been dealt with?"
Mathieu gave a nod. "Of course I do, parrain. And no, it is not. It really is because I have realised that I want Emmeline, and Emmeline alone. I always have."
"You are still so young, mon fils. I know you do not believe that, but you are. You will come to lose that jealousy. You can see Emmeline with her prey. She takes them and discards when they are no longer of use to her. If they begin to fall for her, she loses interest. The thrill is gone. You do not have anything to worry about. But perhaps something you need to think about working more on before you do something like mate with her," Blaise suggested gently. "The days and weeks, even perhaps months, in the wake of mating, you will be extremely sensitive and aware of each other's feelings and emotions. Basing that on jealousy, it could drive you crazy when she must feed. They have, and must learn more self-control. Rory's attackers, however, still remain at large."
Mathieu smirked a little. "I do understand it. Of course I do. And I'm starting to get better at it, but I haven't seen her for a long time. It's easy to fall back into the jealousy when I think about everyone she's been with while in New York. Maybe it really is better to consider the mating further, but I still want to marry her. You haven't given me your permission yet. We can get married first, then try the mating. I realise your relationship with Juliette is different, so you probably never had to deal with the jealousy factor. I'm willing to wait, but I still want to be able to propose to her."
"She is beautiful. That beauty should be shared and admired by others, like a stunning rose. But if everyone took a single petal from that rose to keep for themselves, it would die and be no more. Only one person gets to have the rose all to themselves so it can forever maintain its beauty." With a small smile, Blaise pointed at Mathieu. "But people are never going to cease wanting to admire it. Where you are a priceless Ventrue worth more than your weight, Emmeline is the epitome of Toreador. You both need to work to thrive. You will find your niche together, but it will be trial and error. Non, non, I dealt with jealousy as to Juliette extensively. Lacking approval of men she wishes to favour, and vice versa. Mateship is telling each other that you are taking each other wholly. There will always be jealousy. Control, mon amour. That is the key. With Kindred, it is always the key. You have my permission to marry her, of course. But discuss mating with her further. There is no going back on mating, but death."
"I guess I'm still struggling with the control side of things. That's why I love Emmeline. I don't need to be in control with her because she knows who I am. She knows what I am. There's no holding back, just getting lost in each other. She's always going to be admired, especially given what she does. She is out in the public eye constantly, but I want that rose to be mine. I can't help it, Blaise. I have never loved anyone like I love her." Mathieu finally smiled, his eyes lighting up. "Merci, parrain. I will never be able to thank you enough for this. Of course I will discuss mating further. I'm not about to do anything that would ruin things between us, or hurt her."
Blaise nodded slowly as he listened. "However, your grief and mourning for your father. No more putting it aside, non," he directed. "It will gradually bite away inside you and it is a basis for breeding uncontrollable things like anger and resentment that turn into horrific things like attacking innocent people when you cannot control them. Perhaps you will find being on your own easier to cope with it, but let Emmeline take care of you. She loves you, it will be natural instinct to want to. I realise those words coming out of my mouth are hypocritical, before you say anything, but my scenario is completely different. Too many years experience not to know better."
Mathieu nodded as he turned to look at where Blaise had set down the watch that had belonged to his father. He had carried it on him ever since he had been Mathieu's age, and he was fairly certain that his father had known Blaise for that long as well. "I want her to. I just didn't want to ask it of her in case it was too personal. I know better now. She more than taught me my lesson. I'm just waiting for her to finish with a business call before I go back there. That doesn't mean you're any less deserving of being taken care of, parrain. Hypocritical, but unnecessary. As nice as that woman in here just now was, she will not be a substitute for what you truly crave."
"I have no doubts she will slap you down if you try that again," Blaise agreed with a nod. "You should visit with Rory. He has no one to really just chat to, on a male level, so to speak. He could be a good friend to you. I know how you are, you are not easy at trusting to make friends and companions beyond it being for sexual need. He is... an interesting person. Not so much backwards in coming forward, in any sense. And that, mon amour, is something I do understand. I have been craving it for sometime now. I just wish I could find it without so much pain."
Mathieu shook his head slightly. "Just like I'm sure my father would have wanted my life to have not come at the cost of experiencing such pain. I was lucky to have had a chance at a new life, but I still had the accident. It was not what he imagined for me. I realise you've had more than your fair share of pain, godfather, but sometimes going through the pain is worth it for the prize at the end. I am forever indebted to you for giving me my life back, and to be honest, the accident was worth it. I love being Kindred. My father at least understood that in the end. Just like he loved you, and I think he was growing to love Emmeline. Hm, if you think that then perhaps I will go and see him. He certainly sounds interesting."
"I am not sure it is worth it," Blaise admitted. "I have been given very little but confusion to base my decision on. Even more confusion now. Buffy is pregnant, and there are two possible fathers. I am not sure having her in my world is going to be of benefit to either of us. Even before this, things were confusing. Sometimes people just know when they meet the right person for them. I have not felt that with Buffy. Indeed, you should. I believe he might wish to climb the walls when he is awake. He is very similar to you, had much heartache of his own. He may be someone who understands your situation."
Mathieu let out a long whistle before he just started to laugh in disbelief. "She's what?! Okay, I take it back. I'm not sure I can approve of her anymore. I also do not envy your position, parrain. You are more than welcome to your complicated situation. I think I'd be sick from it, too. If you have not felt it with Buffy, then just let her go. You do not need to waste your time on her." Mathieu nodded. "I cannot blame him for that. I will do anything to save him from the boredom that comes with being stuck in one place."
Blaise shook his head in amusement. "If only life was so easy, mon fils. Between you all under this roof, I believe I am going to go even more crazy. There is also Rory's friend, Airlie. Toreador Childer, and Buffy's best friend, Xander. Rory's brother has come to Paris, but they are estranged, which is again more complications. He also has a Kindred lover and they're members of Britians MI6. Believe me, if I could find a sound way to handle all this, I would be doing it. Besides myself, Rory has not had much to do with male Kindred, or indeed other Ventrue. You will be good for each other. Same age, essentially."
Mathieu got up to stretch his legs, and scratched his stomach again when he realised that he was starting to feel a little peckish. His fangs descended as he thought about going back to Emmeline with a meal to share. He just had to work out who. He hid his fangs again as he turned back to look at Blaise. "I leave you alone for a few months, and this is the mess you get into? I really can't wrap my head around it all just yet. There just suddenly seems to be a lot of human-Kindred relationships popping up. Are you trying to set me up on a Man Date, Blaise?"
"I have been within it for months and I still cannont wrap my head around it, so if you work out a formula, share it with me. Merci. That, however, is an inaccurate assessment. They are all around us. This is just a time they are more in our world than usual." Blaise smirked, standing himself to tie the sash on his robe at his hip before he rubbed his hand over his jaw. "Eat your heart out. Just do not eat him. Do not even think about touching him to feed on him. I forbid it. He has been drained too many times, and he does not wish it. My senses are already all over the place. I am trusting you in his presence, mon amour. I trust you to protect him as I would."
Mathieu gave a slight bow at Blaise's orders. "Bien sur, parrain. I will not feed on him, nor shall I touch him. I shall only protect him, and talk to him. Besides, you know that my tastes do not always extend to men. I only make exceptions when Emmeline is involved. Yes, you're right. They are all around, they really are just more prominent in our world right now. It's easy to forget there's more outside of this city. I cannot imagine leaving France right now. I realise my family are American, but my Dad died here. We made this place our home."
Blaise gave a nod. "Oui, I do. But he is crawling in Kindred signature, it might be a temptation, no matter what he is sporting in his pants. It will be a good test of control for you," he decided. "You know, you are always welcome here. To live. As long as you wish. If you feel the urge to return, we would understand, but you will always be important to me, both personally and professionally. Having said that, I do not envy you one bit for taking Emmeline as your bride. You are going to have your work cut out for you in the near future, I do believe," he added, smirking.
"Why, is she pregnant?" Mathieu asked with a smirk of his own before he held his hands up. "Bad joke. Je suis desole. I would like nothing more than to stay here, and I have every intention of staying for at least a little while. This is Emmeline's home as well, and for the most part wherever she is, I will be. You always did enjoy testing me. I'm sure that's why I'm the Ventrue I am today, parrain." Mathieu moved over to Blaise and kissed him on both cheeks. "I really am sorry I took so long to come and see you."
"Non, just Emmeline," Blaise returned, unphased. "She will likely make a pregnant woman look like an angel. Juliette would love to see you, too. We have been missing you. Perhaps we can have a family gathering at some juncture. The key to being a true Ventrue is to be true to oneself first. You have alway had that in abundance, mon amour. Do not ever change that. It is okay how you initially reacted, just do not stay away anymore. There is no need. Life here is very different now to how it has been, but it is still your home. Your Dad's memory will always be a large part of me."
Mathieu smiled at him. "And for that, I am grateful. He loved you very much, just as I know you cared about him very much. Where is Juliette anyway? I half expected to see her glued to your side considering your condition. A family gathering sounds like a plan. Maybe after I give Emmeline the ring. Do you think you could arrange for a jeweller to bring a collection over? I don't really feel like facing any sort of shopping right now."
"She is watching over Rory. They were... they could have been lovers, but it turned bad. Juliette was part of the reason Rory was where he was when he got attacked. Now he is wary about furthering things with her. Again, another difficult situation with no real obvious solution. He perhaps could have been good for her, but she misjudged his loyalty on some level. It is a shame, because he is a good person." Blaise pushed his fingers through his hair. "I will have a representative from Cartier send over their finest. You will know when you see it what is perfect for her."
"I already made her promise that if we got married, then I was to be trusted with picking the ring. I want it to be my choice for her, not something she tells me to buy. I don't need to be the submissive one either. I am her equal, and I really do have excellent taste. Of course Cartier is still the best. I am sorry to hear about Juliette and Rory. Perhaps all this mess can be sorted out soon. For all you know, my sheer awesomeness will cancel out any shit, and everything will start to work."
Blaise ran his finger along his lips in thought. "I went to a party with him once. The original Monsieur Cartier, before he made anything of himself. She would not want it if she had to select it herself, I believe. She has fine taste, but this is symbolic of so much more. Of course you have excellent taste, you are Ventrue. Nothing but the finest. Well, there you go. Ventrue optimism at its best," he added with a laugh.
Mathieu did another bow, but this one had a lot more theatricality to it. "I am your godson, Blaise. One of us has to have optimism. May as well be me even when I'm knee-deep in grief. Is there anyone you haven't been to a party with?"
Blaise was still smirking knowingly at his godson. "See Jaquelynne regarding Cartier, and perhaps she can point you in the direction of a meal. Then when you see Emmeline next, you can have a sound conversation with her rather than devouring each other in fits of passion. It is amazing how much you can visit when you just simply talk to your lover. Not everything needs to be done naked, mon fils," he told him in amusement.
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