RP LOG with lotterylucky, histhornedrose & gr8muppetyodin

Sep 18, 2010 13:17

[Follows THIS]

Riley was trying desperately not to vomit as he rode the elevator up to the fourteenth floor of the military headquarters. The thing was, despite dragging Buffy along there with him knowing she needed to be there, he couldn't actually reveal anything to her. Not yet. Blaise needed to be the first to know so he could advise on the next move. Of course, Buffy was less than impressed about being kept in the dark as they had made their way through the headquarters that were so technologically advanced, it made The Initiative look like something from the Dark Ages. No bullshit voice recognition for security, it was all retinal recognition and fingerprint code pads. A lot of the staff were getting around in civilian clothing, too. Camos were really only isolated to those out in the field. Riley tended to chop and change between both depending on what he was working on. Buffy had been getting more and more pissed off by the second, demanding to know if this was some sort of joke or trick or set up, but Riley just kept telling her to wait, which probably just pissed her off more.

He had been filled in completely by Graham and the team, and although he was left reeling, he had to try and keep it together to somehow figure out what should be done here. It wasn't just a random attack. It was an attack on a Hunter, and an international one at that. It could just be a mere case of someone getting wind that Rory had been getting close to Blaise and Juliette, but who really knew? The other theory was that he was attacked in an attempt to lure Buffy in. Either way, Riley was not a happy camper.


Buffy was next to him in the elevator with her arms firmly crossed and a deep frown on her face. Obviously when all else failed, she was resorting to the silent treatment. The only thing was, as the elevator arrived on the floor and Riley stepped out, indicating Buffy follow him, it was just a sheer case of bad timing. Graham was standing outside the bay of interview rooms with Blaise and Juliette, both obviously oblivious to the fact Riley would drag Buffy in on this. Riley did an about-turn to drag Buffy back into the elevator, but then Blaise's sharp senses had obviously kicked in and in a flash, he had locked them with a piercing gaze. Or rather, locked Buffy with one. The look on Juliette's face, however, was a far different story at the sight of the Slayer.

Juliette flashed her teeth as the anger bubbled up inside her, ignoring Blaise's soft warning as she took a step forward. The Kindred woman's eyes turned silver and she let out a low, menacing growl. The Slayer had gone too far by sleeping with Rory, and then breaking Blaise's heart. "Get her out of here. I will not let her near us."

Buffy's gaze was still locked with Blaise's and at first she hadn't heard Juliette. She was stuck on what she actually wanted to say to Blaise. All the things that were caught on the tip of her tongue, but things she was hardly about to let slip in front of their current audience. Then she felt the cold trickle at realising Juliette really was serious about not letting Buffy near them. She blinked back the sudden tears, and her expression crumbled before she just gave a nod. She didn't even wait for Riley to agree. She already knew he was going to follow any order the Kindred gave. She met Graham's gaze briefly before she pointed at him. "It's okay, I'll just... I'll hang here." Maybe it would be awkward as all hell, but she figured trying to fight Juliette wasn't going to win her any points. This was the one time she would wave the white flag no matter how much it hurt.

At some point, Riley had actually stepped in between Juliette and Buffy, even if there was still quite the space between them. He had his hand held up to Juliette as he gestured to Graham with his other. "Take Buffy to Interview Six. I'll be there shortly to talk to her about everything. Has there been any change elsewhere?" he asked Graham, holding his gaze for a moment. He was referring to Rory's condition and didn't need to elaborate for Graham to know what he meant.

"No, Sir. No change," Graham stated evenly and was already stepping in front of Buffy to conceal the Kindreds' view of her, and indeed of Buffy's view of them.

Riley watched them go and then turned back to Blaise and Juliette indicating they should enter the room. "Monsieur Richelieu, Mademoiselle Rousseau," he greeted them and then followed them inside, closing the door. He was praying he got through this discussion without vomiting, but it was still very much on the cards. He sat down and pulled the closed file towards him that was already waiting for him on the table. Blaise was pulling Juliette's chair out for her like a perfect gentleman. Riley was immediately jealous of how perfect he seemed. "I'm going to be straight with you here. None of us need to be beating around the bush. There was a Kindred attack late last night. Three perpertrators. My men managed to intercept the attack just before Embrace occurred, but the victim was drained and beaten. I suspect he was to be left for dead on the side of the road. Phosphorus bullets were inevitably used. The bodies are in our possession, awaiting burning upon your inspection. The victim was Rory Buchanan, and the attack occured barely two miles away from your estate."

Juliette was on the verge of calming down now the Slayer was out of her sight even if she was still bristling. She couldn't help it. Even as Blaise acted the perfect gentleman her inner vampire was screaming for blood. She had been close to ignoring anything that Riley said as she imagined all the horrible ways she could dispense with the petite blonde a few rooms away. The only thing that was stopping her was that it wasn't what Blaise wanted. He was going to have the Slayer and her minions taken care of through the official channels, so all Juliette could do was bite her tongue. Until she heard Rory's name. Her chair was soon flying back towards the wall of the interview room as her nails dug into the smooth metallic surface of the table. "Ce sont des conneries! Allez a enfer."

Blaise held his hand up to silence her, but he was looking at Riley intently. He wasn't lying. He had absolutely no reason to lie about this, despite their confrontation the day before. Indeed, Rory had been present at that point, and he appeared fine then. He was furious. So furious that it was even difficult for him to draw on appropriate words to continue the conversation. Embracing against one's will was the ultimate crime within the Kindred, and to hear that three of his kind had taken part in such an horrific crime upon an innocent victim was atrocious. Beyond atrocious. Blaise wanted blood. They might be dead, but he wouldn't be finished with them. He didn't even know what to begin to think of all of this. Rory was a Hunter, but he wasn't Hunting for Kindred. Quite the opposite in fact. Unless his link to Buffy... Blaise's own eyes flashed with a sudden, abrupt anger and he was up out of his seat, seizing Riley by the collar of his shirt. "Swear to me the Slayer was not involved in this," he growled, holding Riley's face close to his.

The answer that came was a mistake, and Riley knew it even as he was saying it. "She was with me all night. She wasn't involved." As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he cursed, struggling to catch his breath from how Blaise was near choking him with the shirt. "I was sick! She stayed with me because I was sick! Jesus fucking Christ, how is any of this helping Buchanan?! A little heads-up that your mate was involved with him might have actually helped me, too. It would explain why he was anywhere near your place. I have teams out on red alert trying to figure out why the fuck he was there without a need to be."

Blaise abruptly released his grip, though his eyes were still bright silver with the anger. "Your theory, Sergeant Finn. I'm sure Juliette is waiting with baited breath to hear it. Juliette, tell him anything you know. Now," he demanded.

Juliette took a moment to get her chair back before she sat down again and tried to regain her composure. She had no idea how to speak again without it coming out angry. She wanted someone to pay for this atrocity. She blamed the Slayer, she blamed whatever Kindred were stupid enough to try and Embrace Rory against his will. She blamed Rory, but mostly she blamed herself. "We are friends. We're... We were still working it out. I didn't think he would come to see me. I wasn't expecting him to want to. Not if his attentions were elsewhere. Not if what he wanted was something I would never be able to give him. Those particular details I do not think you need to have, Sergeant Finn. I only know that Rory tried to visit. Our guards did not admit him. On my orders."

Riley sat back down heavily in the hard steel chair, rubbing at his throat and realising Blaise's nails must have released with his anger, because Riley's shirt was torn around the throat. He was lucky it wasn't his flesh. He was hit with a wave of nausea and he had to swallow and look away momentarily to force it to pass. "I'm sorry," he apologised to them and cleared his throat. He played over again in his mind what she had just said, trying to find some common links, or possible leads he could latch on to to follow. He narrowed his eyes a little. "Are you telling me that you cut Rory off when Blaise cut Buffy off?" he asked, trying to understand the situation better. "Why? Rory's a Hunter. That's not even in the same realm as a Vampire Slayer. There is also absolutely no evidence that he provoked this attack in any way. He tried to defend himself, but that was it. Did he even know you had cut him off? When did you last speak to him?"

Juliette glanced away briefly before she gave a nod. "Because I will never be able to give him a family, Sergeant Finn. Do you understand that? And because I did not trust myself after finding out he had been with Buffy. As hypocritical as it is while I sit next to my mate, there it is, oui? I last spoke to him the first day he was in France. He left when things became a little too much, a little too emotional. He did say something like, 'see you later' but it's been a few days and no word. I was doing what was best for Kindred."

Riley was looking at her incredulously, and then looked to Blaise as if seeking some sort of ridiculous confirmation of what she was saying. "Are you kidding me? What is it freaking with you chicks and making our decisions for us?! Mapping out all our reactions?! Assuming what we're thinking?! Do you know friggen annoying that is?" Okay, so maybe he was projecting, but he couldn't help it. "He says 'see you later', then goes into the city to get drunk because things get a little too emotional, and you just... just... cut him the hell out of your world? No. No, no. I'm sorry. I'm not buying that. We all know what is going on here. You cut him out because Blaise cut Buffy out, plain and simple. Now he is lying in our infirmary beaten to a pulp and drained of his life's blood. You were doing what was damn best for you. So, just cut the crap here. Both of you. And don't think for a damn minute that I am buying that you two haven't slept together in the time that Rory slept with Buffy. Hypocrisy is a joke, the fact Rory was nearly killed isn't."

Blaise had remained quiet through Riley's speech, though he didn't miss a single word of it, including the misguided projection... albeit an honest one. His eyes narrowed slightly but he had no intentions of commenting on it. "Unless Mademoiselle Summers has been out hunting for prey within my city to have spurred a vengeful attack on her friend, then she remains out of this conversation. She was neither involved nor present at the time it occured, by your own indication, and if she was stupid enough to be Slaying in my city, that close to my home, then I entrust that your faction will continue to protect us as I requested of you yesterday. Despite your beliefs, Sergeant Finn, and despite my personal feelings, I did not come to you as a knee-jerk hope to punish Buffy for sharing your bed or that of Rory Buchanan. I came to you for protection of Kindred within my city. If you have any reason to believe that the attack occured as a result of any link to Buffy, then I expect you to be completely honest with me. If not, then I will immediately get to the source of the rebellion within the Clan responsible and there will be appropriate punishment."

"I don't believe for a minute that Buffy would hurt you so purposefully as to try and slay in your city. I think if there is any link to her, or her being in Paris is the reason for the attack, then it is beyond her and absolutely an issue for you to deal with. If Buffy's presence is the reason some of your Kindred have taken it upon themselves to seek revenge, then we all know why she's in Paris, don't we," Riley said with a pointed look at Blaise.

Juliette held calm through Riley's tirade, and didn't even bat an eyelid. She was hardly going to retract what she'd said. Blaise might have wanted her to cooperate but she wasn't going to apologise. Especially not in the face of a misguided outburst. "All I care about is justice for what was done to Rory. Perhaps I did cut him off, but would have been better for both of us. He would not have felt... obligated to see me. Having said that--" Juliette broke off as she clenched her jaw briefly and her eyes returned to green before she glanced from Riley to Blaise. "How long will Rory be held here? I would prefer it if he was released into my care. Without a lecture."

Riley only just managed to bite back the urge to call her a bitch. She wanted to play the martyr now. Rory was obligated to see her. Instead, he just snorted, looking away for a few moments when he couldn't tolerate holding the gaze for fear he might say something he really regretted. 'Held here? Are you serious? I cannot believe I am having a conversation like this. He is not being held here. He is unconscious, covered in bruises, broken bones. He is receiving a blood transfusion and other medical treatment. The last thing anyone needs is him in a public hospital with staff asking pointy questions. I don't care if you want a lecture or not. There is no way on this freaking earth I am releasing him into your care until you give me a reason why I should. All I can see right now is a cold-hearted bitch who wanted nothing but distance from him when he had the honesty to open up to you emotionally." There, he said it. And he wasn't going to apologise for it, either. "You're all so damn quick to judge Buffy, but maybe you should stop and look at yourselves for a few moments."

Coming from anyone else, and in any other situation, Blaise would have really lost his cool at this. "Enough. Finite," he barked sharply, standing up so he had the height over Riley. "I will not say it again. She is not to be mentioned. You will take us to see Monsiuer Buchanan so we can analyse the wound to indicate who is responsible for the attack. Certain clans will leave marks, others attack in specific ways. I need to see the victim to know what should be done next."

"Blaise is right, but to address your comment that I am a coldhearted bitch, Sergeant Finn, let me just say this," Juliette started softly as she held her hand up towards Blaise before he could cut her off. "You are divorced, non? You know what it is to have your heart broken. You understand what it is like to need to open your heart after such a thing, to find the will to allow yourself to love again. Even Rory will understand all this. And the loss that comes with outliving the one you love, the one you would give your heart to. I am old, Sergeant Finn. I am not yet as old as Blaise, but I am still old. And even after centuries of guarding my heart, I still do not find it any easier to give away - to trust to another. I get scared, I get lonely. I am still subject to human emotions. Sometimes it is easier to just cut someone out than to be hurt and forgive them. We fool ourselves into just trying to forget. Forget what they mean to us, forget how much we desperately just want to be as important to them as they are to us." Juliette's gaze dropped to her hand that was resting on the table in front of her. "That is why I threw the walls up around my heart again. You can understand that, can't you? It is also why I want to have him in my care. I... I am falling for him already."

Blaise wasn't going to stick around for any of this. In fact, he shot Juliette a furious look and then went over to the door, throwing it open roughly to exit the room. Riley watched him go and then turned back to Juliette calmly. Blaise wouldn't actually have the ability to exit the interview area without Riley's access through the doors to the other departments, so there was no immediate rush to follow him and make sure he didn't walk into places he shouldn't be. "Then you could have just told him that, Mademoiselle Rousseau. My point still stands. Trying to justify this all to me doesn't take away the fact he is seriously injured, and was nearly Embraced. My feelings or personal life are irrelevant. Anything I say won't take away your guilt." He stood up and went over to the door, holding it open for her. "I will take you to see him."

Juliette just gave a nod as she stayed quiet. Maybe it had been more trying to justify it to herself than to Riley. She also had no idea what she was supposed to say to Blaise. In all the years she had known him, it was only now that he was starting to become unpredictable and the realisation scared her. She pushed back from her chair and slipped from the room quietly before trying to see where her mate had gone. He would not be happy with her, only she couldn't bring herself to apologise. Not for speaking the truth. "Merci, Sergeant Finn," she murmured as he joined her again.

With a small nod at her, Riley exited the room after her and he spotted Blaise standing up by the elevator with his hand resting against the wall as he looked down at his feet. For a moment, Riley actually thought the guy was ill and was using the wall to hold himself up, but sensing their presence, Blaise straightened up and gave them a mere glance. Riley narrowed his eyes, analysing first Blaise then the rest of the corridor. He was tired and he was sick and he was damn fed up with this whole unspoken feelings bullshit bubbling under the surface. He was sick of being dragged into an emotional mess that wasn't his and he had no need to be dragged in to. Buffy might be his ex, but that was where it ceased. "Monsieur Richelieu, a word," he requested and nodded in the direction of one of the interview rooms nearest the elevator. He waited for Blaise to move and then went over him, catching up just in time to walk into the room before him.

The thing was, Buffy's presence was known to him, but it wasn't known to Blaise. This was the room he had asked Graham to bring Buffy to so she could wait, and Blaise hadn't hesitated in following him in there, likely expecting to talk business. But Riley stepped aside as soon as they were both in there, and about simultaneous to Blaise realising Buffy was there, he stepped backwards out of the room again and pulled the door firmly closed behind him with a satisfied nod, effectively isolating Buffy and Blaise in a room alone together. He pressed his fingertips to the security pad and waited for the recognition. "Isolate, thirty minutes," he stated and the electronic voice repeated it back to him upon locking the door. He went back over to Juliette. "No need to rip me to shreds. He's pefectly safe," he assured her and hit the down button on the elevator.

Juliette arched an eyebrow and fought to keep herself from growling. Riley seemed to be winning no favours with her today, but she more than understood that he probably didn't care. She also couldn't help but wonder if he had any idea at all what kind of trouble he would be in with Blaise once the Kindred Prince made it out of the interview room. "I'll believe it when I see it," she replied softly. She smoothed her hands down over her blouse and skirt, ensuring that she still looked immaculate. "You said he was unconscious, oui? Have your doctors said for how long they expect him to be so?" She might have switched the subject back to Rory, but she was still listening intently for sounds of a struggle from the room Blaise was now locked in.

"Then he can take it up with me later. If he's lucky, I won't barf on his Armani," Riley replied as the elevator arrived and the doors opened. "Ladies first," he told her, gesturing into the cubicle. The infirmary was on the third floor. In fact, the whole of the third floor was like a mini hospital, state of the art, albeit still military. At least Rory would have the best doctors at his disposal. He wanted to ask her if Blaise was sick or something, but he figured he would just get brick wall answers, so he didn't bother. Instead, he just hit the 3 button and wiped the beads of perspiration from his forehead with the back of his wrist. "A couple of days at least, I would assume. They'll probably keep him asleep for that long so he doesn't wake. You'll know what I mean when you see him. He's very injured, he would be in a lot of pain if he was awake."

"If your men had not killed the connards that did this, I would rip them to shreds," Juliette threatened with a growl. Her eyes had flashed silver briefly but now they turned with concern onto Riley. She could smell the sickness on him, not just see it. "Are you alright, Sergeant? You look as if you could use a bed yourself. Blaise has enough Armani to sacrifice one suit if you do choose to barf on him. He will complain, but he really does have others," she joked with a slight smile.

Finally, Riley shot her a reluctant smile. It was easy to get wrapped up in the seriousness and the business of being a soldier. He often did it, without even realising he was being all business only. "I was supposed to be off sick today. But, you know, sometimes things are just more important. Just so long as I manage to stay concious without fainting, I can still do my job. I mean, it's not like you and Blaise can catch anything off me, is there? Rory will be drugged up to his eyeballs on prophylatic antibiotics, so he won't catch anything. I don't know. Maybe I'm just allergic to certain... situations lately." He cleared his throat and crossed his arms over his chest. "My men are some of the best in the world, Mademoiselle Rousseau. As are our medical staff. He'll be fine. I just imagine extremely spooked when he wakes up."

Juliette let out a sigh, a habit that was hard to break after years of maintaining the masquerade. She knew how to keep up the appearance of breathing, and how to use it to effect. She stared ahead of them as the doors to the elevator started to open before she placed a hand on Riley's arm. "I realise Blaise will have more cause to disapprove of my actions, but would you perhaps... allow me to sit with Rory until he does wake? At least then he'll have someone familiar here. Even if I did make a mistake."

Riley pressed his lips together and sighed. He stepped out into the infirmary and then turned to her. "I'll make you a deal. You go home after you see him and I'll make sure they don't stop the sedation until they call you and you can come back for when he wakes up. For now, he really does need to sleep through the aftermath, and you really don't want to be stuck sitting around a military hospital. I promise, I'll make sure he's taken good care of. Trust me, he'll appreciate a familiar face. I've woken up in my fair share of military hospitals, and it never gets better. It's never easy being alone, either. I'm not as big a prick as I come across."

Juliette held her hand out for him to shake. "I accept your terms. And really, I've met bigger pricks. I sleep with one of them." She smiled at her little joke before she turned her head as she caught Rory's scent under the rich tang of blood, and the burning odour of disinfectant. Her nostrils flared briefly before she followed the scent, not needing Riley's guidance to find the Scotsman's bed. She gripped the foot of it as she stared at Rory's broken body. "Mon dieu... what have they done to you, mon amour?"

At her comment about Blaise, Riley just bit down on his lip and looked down at his shoes momentarily. He didn't know why that bothered him. Probably still weird residual feelings about realising things with Buffy really were just history. Or maybe he was just lonely and wanted that with someone too. Someone who wasn't an ex who didn't want him in return. He just followed her to Rory's cubicle. The doctors had Rory on life support, but only because he had lost so much blood. Once the transfusion worked, he would be taken off it to heal on his own. It was just confronting. Of course it was. Rory was black and blue. He had a cracked head, broken ribs, a broken arm. "They wanted him down," he murmured, looking over the Scot. "I don't understand why they wanted to turn him, though."

Juliette raised her hand to her mouth as she shock started to set in. She had seen many bodies in her time, but nothing like this. Or rather none mutilated that had meant so much to her. She moved around to the side of Rory's bed as she looked over his injuries, her eyes narrowing in thought. "I know there was a lot of talk about Buffy being a cause, but perhaps it was more... Blaise. He is the Kindred Prince, but that does not mean he is not above personal attacks. And when they cannot get close enough, they will attempt to go after those they assume are close. Why not turn a Hunter that is apparently suddenly close to him?"

"There would be no reason Blaise would be directly hurt by Rory's Embrace. If anyone is the cause, it's you, Mademoiselle. And excuse me for saying so. Vengeance on Blaise seeking vengeance on you, via Rory. I don't mean to indicate he is hurt because of you, but it would be the soundest explanation. Of course, I can't even begin to know what Kindred could have to seek vengeance on an innocent victim in such a vicious way. I only know what I have been told and what I have researched. In saying that, it could just be a completely random attack. It looked like he had stopped on the side of the road for some reason, and his cell phone was on the passenger seat of the car. The engine was still running, so... who really knows," Riley murmured.

Juliette blinked at Riley's words before she touched her fingers to Rory's hair with one hand and fished out her mobile phone with the other. She dialled the number for her message service before handing it to the soldier. "My guilt will never fade, Sergeant Finn. I am the cause..."

Riley looked at the phone and then reached out to take it and put it to his ear. He listened quietly to the message, watching Rory's unconscious face with a small frown. When the message ended, he handed the phone back and bit back the temptation to say 'I told you so'. "That doesn't mean you're the cause. It means he got attacked coming from your place. We don't know there is any connection. He sounds upset and pissed off, but I doubt he threw himself into a pack of vicious Kindred to placate himself. Unless you're saying some of your guards could be responsible...?"

Juliette's head snapped up even if her hand was still resting lightly on Rory's head. "Our guards are carefully vetted. I cannot imagine they would perpetrate such an atrocity. That they would be so foolish as to go after someone like Rory." She looked down at the Scotsman again. "Then again, I do not know much of anything anymore."

Riley held up a hand in apology. "Still, sounds like he had an awful lot of guns pointed at him. All it would take was one who wanted to go that little step further to protect your honour. You're beautiful. I am sure Blaise isn't the only one who is attracted to you and in admiration of you. In saying that, do you have any Kindred guards in Clans capable of this level of ferocity? I would think Blaise would be quite choosy about who guards his premises." He paused. "Why, really, did you order them to hold him off seeing you? That was pretty intense action for just deciding you were doing the best thing for him."

Juliette leaned forward to brush a soft kiss to Rory's forehead even if he was bruised, and murmured something in French quietly into his ear before she straightened up and faced Riley. "Because I am not perfect. I was jealous, and feeling petty. The fact that Blaise had smelt both you and Rory on Buffy made me angry, d'accord? I did it because I was in pain. I realise it's hypocritical as you said before, and I suppose I did not mean for him to remain faithful when we are not even together. But I did not want him to sleep with a woman that could have held Blaise's heart. I felt my own betrayal, and my mate's." She frowned a little. "It is the first time I have ever truly regretted my own actions. As for the guards, there is one. I still cannot see him being this stupid, but perhaps someone made the right offer to him. His name is Luc."

Riley sat down on one of the nearby chairs, the one he had sat in when Graham had filled him in on what had happened. He was still feeling tired and weak. His stomach was all churny again, too. Maybe he really did need to be in bed, but that would have to wait. "They were drunk, you know. Rory told me he can barely remember sleeping with Buffy. We do stupid things when we're drunk. In saying that, I can't even blame alcohol for sleeping with her. It was just plain stupidity. She hurt me so much in the past, I didn't know what I thought would make it different this time. It wasn't different. It was all very much the same. In my own defense, I didn't know she was so tied to Blaise. Not at all. I wouldn't have done it if I had known." He nodded, noting the name. "I'll have deeper investigation into him. So, Blaise liked a mix of Clans in his services? For some reason I assumed he would stick to his own. Strange the assumptions one can make."

Juliette clicked her tongue in disapproval as she shook her head. "Non, non, non, Sergeant. Have you never heard what they say about something that is whole and the sum of its parts? Blaise is a beloved Prince because he knows how to appreciate each clan. He knows how to play their strengths, and how to protect their weaknesses. For the most part. He is a businessman at heart. He will do what it takes to survive, and to survive he understands that it won't be because he has nothing but other Ventrue at his command. Have you never read the business pages in a newspaper? Can you imagine a court filled with power-hungry Kindred? They would all have their eyes on his throne." Juliette brushed her fingers through Rory's hair as she watched his barely recognisable face. "I do not think even Buffy realises how tied she is to Blaise. Just like I do not think even he realises just how tied to her he was. I am sorry your heart was broken again, Sergeant Finn. I truly am. But to be fair, I did actually defend you at first. I know what it is like to love the thing you will never have."

"Makes sense," Riley agreed quietly and folded his arms around his waist to lean forward with his elbows on his knees. He was more and more realising just how much he had to learn about Kindred. Maybe he would never stop learning. He had only been on the job a few months and had been bombarded with information since then. Blaise had worked closely with him in the early days making sure he knew the essentials, but it was the finer details that had to come out on their own with different situations. He gave a small laugh. "I'm sorry too. But you've got it wrong, and that's the shitty part. I don't still love Buffy. I've just been so hurt and screwed up, that I guess it was more like trying to grip onto a piece of my past that was pretty good. At least, it was good for awhile. Until it stopped being good and just started being... a constant battle for her affection, for her attention, for her to trust me, for her to lean on me. I got tired. Really tired. Maybe I still am. I'm just not ready to completely give up yet."

"On love, or Buffy?" Juliette asked as she looked at him. She couldn't help but still wonder if the soldier was as ready to let go of the Slayer as he said. He might now know that there was something between her and Blaise, but that didn't always mean a person was ready to give up. "Last question about her, I promise," she added after a moment. "I do not mean to pry, but I suppose I just want to try and understand. Blaise is... hurting. He might not seem like it, but he is. His actions are also not a direct result of the hurt. He really is concerned about the threat an army of Slayers might pose. He is not quite himself," she finally admitted with a wry twist of her lips.

"Love," Riley replied without hesitation. "Buffy isn't the only one who has broken my heart. She just prolonged it a lot more than my wife did. I know what you're thinking, but I hadn't actually thought about Buffy in a long time until I knew I was being based in Europe and I figured I would drop in to visit her and her friends in Scotland. If she had been single, then maybe it would have been nice to consider the notion that we could have given it another chance, but trust me, Mademoiselle Rousseau, when a girl breaks your heart that badly, once you get over it, you aren't exactly going to rush back into anything with her. I'm not chasing her around like a lovesick puppy, and for the record, what happened between me and Buffy the other day was mutual. It wasn't me sniffing around her like a love-starved desperado who hasn't possibly been able to live without her presence. She made her choice a long, long time ago. It was just sex. If it was going to be anything else, it would have taken me a long time to trust that she wouldn't hurt me again. I know Blaise is hurting. He came to see me. He was strangely transparent when it came to that. I know where his request is stemming from. He believes that because Buffy has run off to sleep with two other guys since... whatever it was with him, that he really is uncertain he can trust her with the information he gave her in confidence. She hasn't given him a whole lot to be secure that he can trust her. Valid fear, and to be honest, I know nothing about this army of Slayers beyond the fact they exist, so I have to agree that maybe there is a threat. It's my job to take care of that. Because I can actually vouch for the fact not all Slayers are pure, and I can't buy they would all be one hundred percent innocent with the power they have. Power goes to peoples heads. There was even one Slayer who managed to body swap with Buffy, and deliberately slept with me to get revenge on Buffy... or something. I still don't quite get it. Total mindfuck, especially when Buffy blamed me for cheating on her when I had no idea I did it until after the fact."

Juliette tilted her head as she regarded him. "Body swap? Not that the existence of magic is hardly strange to me, but a body swap is new. Especially between two Slayers. He'll need more time to trust her again if he can even let himself risk it. She'll have a lot of ground to make up. All Blaise really wants is to fall in love." Juliette ran her tongue over her lips as she moistened them before meeting Riley's gaze, her green eyes piercing his blue ones. "Perhaps for the last time. And that information does not leave this cubicle, do you understand?"

"Of course," Riley murmured with a nod. "And trust me, I know exactly how he feels. I've had enough brushes with my own death to know not to take life for granted. Some days I wonder why the hell I bother wanting to love again when all that seems to happen is..." He waved his fingers dismissively, not even sure he could say it all out loud without feeling like an idiot again. "But then other days, I miss that closeness of someone. The intimacy. The affection. The taking care of someone. Buffy and my wife, neither of them wanted that. They always wanted to believe they were above and beyond needing a mere guy to look after them. But I can't help it. That's me. It's what I want. So, I can understand exactly how he feels. Probably exactly how you feel too."

Juliette gave him a sad smile and took the seat next to him. As much as she'd promised to leave once seeing Rory, she still wanted to stay by his bedside for a few more moments. "It is a hard thing to let yourself be taken care of, and to take care of someone. It requires absolute trust, absolute faith in them that they'll keep you safe. Sometimes it's that final jump that we cannot make. Yet we still want it. We still want to meet the person that will make us jump. I hope you find someone, Sergeant Finn. You're one of the few good men left in this world."

"Instead, the other person ends up doing all the jumping to the point they're just plain damn exhausted," Riley pointed out with a small shrug. "Buffy and me have a lot of history. Too much, probably. Her friends told me I should try to seek her out, so I assumed that meant something. I ended up running into her before I even decided to actually find her, though. I guess her friends were just messing with me, or they don't really know why she's in Paris. Either way, it doesn't matter. I think I was just hurt too much. I'll probably never forget it. It's easy to say move on and make a fresh start, which I'm sure I can do. Just not with Buffy."

"We are all capable of fresh starts... It's just gathering the energy to accomplish them that is the part we struggle with." Juliette looked down at her pale hands folded in her lap as she frowned, her eyebrows knitting together tightly. "Thank you for getting there in time. For your team stopping the Kindred before Rory was Embraced. Not just because it is against our law to Embrace against someone's will. But because I am not ready for him to stop being alive."

"I wish I could say it was me, but it wasn't. I was at home in bed ill. It was my second-in-charge, Graham. One of my closest friends. He heard there was unrest at your estate and dispatched the team straight away. I can understand how you are feeling. It must be tempting to consider even just slightly, though, that he would be around with you forever if he had been Embraced," Riley guessed, watching her as he wiped his forehead again. "I know you're still human enough to contemplate something like that. No one wants to say goodbye to someone they love."

Juliette gave a small shake of her head. "I do not want him to hate what he would be. To hate me because he might think that it was something I wanted. If he is ever to be Embraced, if he would ever consider spending as close to forever as we would get with me... Then I would consider it."

Riley wished he could understand more of this, but he couldn't. He couldn't understand why anyone would choose a life like that. In saying that, it would be better to end up Kindred than any other type of vicious vampire. But still, it was a cursed life no matter how you looked at it. "You know, I'm really not feeling that great. I'm just gonna go..." He stood up and gestured in the direction of the bathrooms. "Whatever it is, it won't be pretty, so I'll leave you to it. No rush. Just... stay as long as you need."

"Merci, Sergeant. I hope you feel better," Juliette replied, but her gaze was already back on Rory.

Word Count | 7,443

[co-written] gr8muppetyodin, [with] buffy summers, [co-written] histhornedrose, [co-written] lotterylucky, [with] juliette rousseau, [ship] blaise/buffy, [with] riley finn, [verse] tender trap

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