With a little help from my (little)friends
Dear LiveJournal,
I'd like to recite to you a tale . . . a tale of woe and sadness and yet one of hope.
Chapter One - The hot little couple
Once upon a time, there was this married couple - a strikingly handsome husband and his equally beautiful wife. The husband was a bit eccentric though and the wife liked to lovingly tease him. They were very much in love and life was awesome in their quaint little apartment.
Chapter Two - The dark invaders
One day, the couple, still very much in love mind you, had come home to find out that their tiny kitchen in their quaint little apartment was filled with ants. Little six legged invaders that streamed in from multiple locations. Their goal - little crumbs left on the kitchen counter. I'm not saying that the couple was slovenly or that their kitchen was particularly unkempt, but there is the general idea that if you leave some dishes in your kitchen for even the briefest period of time, not days mind you, that you will then experience the coming of the swarm! The beautiful wife was quite distressed about the situation. They tried placing ant traps, sealing crevices, and spraying but to no avail. Every meal was taken with the fear of the little six legged invaders coming to infest the kitchen. Nothing they seemed to do would stop the tide. If they plugged one hole, the ants found another. It a a dark and sorrowful time for the otherwise happy couple.
Chapter Three - The silly husband
The husband, who was still striking handsome, but perhaps a little more careworn, one day remembered that in his youth, his family encountered a similar situation. Excitedly, he told his wife what they had to do. They had to train the ants and teach them that there was no food to be found here. The wife, looking quite lovely, was somewhat skeptical of the idea. "Train ants?", she said. "Can it be done?" "Well what else do you want to do, love of my life?", replied the husband to his wife. With some trepidation, the wife reluctantly agreed to go with her husband's somewhat unusual scheme.
Chapter Four - The ant tamer . . . err trainer
For the next few weeks, the couple made sure that there was no food to be found whatsoever in their tiny kitchen within their cozy abode. All plates and utensils were washed and put away right after meals. The garbage was not even placed in the garbage can. Counters were constantly wiped down. All the trash was instead taken outside to the larger community trash receptacle. At first, the ants still seemed to be lurking as if ready to pounce on the merest morsel of food should it happen to drop. Pounce indeed they would have, had it not been for the careful attention to detail that the couple paid to their daily regimen. However, the tables slowly turned and with each passing day it seemed like more ants were giving up the prospect of finding food of any sort in this particular kitchen.
Chapter Five - The (ant)Empire strikes back
It looked like the couple was on the way to a peaceful resolution of the problem. The ants' presence was no longer felt and the couple was joyfully talking about returning to being able to use the garbage can in the kitchen again as well as being able to leave dishes in the sink until after a meal instead of cleaning them all beforehand. All was on track until the day of the cookie crumb. One day, while coming home from an event, the happy couple walked into their apartment to see ANTS! Streams and streams of ants. The horror! The sheer inhumanity! The ants were after some cookie crumbs left on the counter. There seemed to be far more ants than needed to take the cookie crumbs, but perhaps the ants did not seem to care. Perhaps it was their way of combining work and play. Grab a few crumbs, chat with a few buddies, get outside of the colony, etc. While each side maintains its innocence of the following events and it cannot be denied that the crumbs were there. The husband secretly suspected that it was the wife that left the crumbs, and the wife believed that the husband was the one at fault. Regardless of who was at fault, the damage was done. The ants were back with a vengeance.
Chapter Six - A new hope
The wife mercilessly yet lovingly teased her poor husband at his failed attempt at ant training, suggesting that perhaps ants could not be trained. The husband was quite despondent, muttering "But it should have worked." The couple was at their wits' end trying to figure out what to do, but it was around this time that the wife, at the husband's gentle prodding, began looking for a new place to move. A place that was perhaps free from the long reach of the ants' empire. With some research the wife discovered a new place they could get in a far off land called Irvine. It was a magical mystical place filled with magical bears, happy ducks, unicorns, but with no ants. The couple scrimped and saved over the next few months and was able to secure a deposit to buy their new home, leaving their current ant problems behind.
THE END
For those who wish to know there is a sequel called:
Revenge of the Sith(Ants)
This was all brought about by a posting on cnn.com today stating that ants can teach each other and learn.
http://www.cnn.com/2006/TECH/science/01/11/ants.teching.reut/index.html
Well sorry for the long post. Some may enjoy it more than others.
I'd like to recite to you a tale . . . a tale of woe and sadness and yet one of hope.
Chapter One - The hot little couple
Once upon a time, there was this married couple - a strikingly handsome husband and his equally beautiful wife. The husband was a bit eccentric though and the wife liked to lovingly tease him. They were very much in love and life was awesome in their quaint little apartment.
Chapter Two - The dark invaders
One day, the couple, still very much in love mind you, had come home to find out that their tiny kitchen in their quaint little apartment was filled with ants. Little six legged invaders that streamed in from multiple locations. Their goal - little crumbs left on the kitchen counter. I'm not saying that the couple was slovenly or that their kitchen was particularly unkempt, but there is the general idea that if you leave some dishes in your kitchen for even the briefest period of time, not days mind you, that you will then experience the coming of the swarm! The beautiful wife was quite distressed about the situation. They tried placing ant traps, sealing crevices, and spraying but to no avail. Every meal was taken with the fear of the little six legged invaders coming to infest the kitchen. Nothing they seemed to do would stop the tide. If they plugged one hole, the ants found another. It a a dark and sorrowful time for the otherwise happy couple.
Chapter Three - The silly husband
The husband, who was still striking handsome, but perhaps a little more careworn, one day remembered that in his youth, his family encountered a similar situation. Excitedly, he told his wife what they had to do. They had to train the ants and teach them that there was no food to be found here. The wife, looking quite lovely, was somewhat skeptical of the idea. "Train ants?", she said. "Can it be done?" "Well what else do you want to do, love of my life?", replied the husband to his wife. With some trepidation, the wife reluctantly agreed to go with her husband's somewhat unusual scheme.
Chapter Four - The ant tamer . . . err trainer
For the next few weeks, the couple made sure that there was no food to be found whatsoever in their tiny kitchen within their cozy abode. All plates and utensils were washed and put away right after meals. The garbage was not even placed in the garbage can. Counters were constantly wiped down. All the trash was instead taken outside to the larger community trash receptacle. At first, the ants still seemed to be lurking as if ready to pounce on the merest morsel of food should it happen to drop. Pounce indeed they would have, had it not been for the careful attention to detail that the couple paid to their daily regimen. However, the tables slowly turned and with each passing day it seemed like more ants were giving up the prospect of finding food of any sort in this particular kitchen.
Chapter Five - The (ant)Empire strikes back
It looked like the couple was on the way to a peaceful resolution of the problem. The ants' presence was no longer felt and the couple was joyfully talking about returning to being able to use the garbage can in the kitchen again as well as being able to leave dishes in the sink until after a meal instead of cleaning them all beforehand. All was on track until the day of the cookie crumb. One day, while coming home from an event, the happy couple walked into their apartment to see ANTS! Streams and streams of ants. The horror! The sheer inhumanity! The ants were after some cookie crumbs left on the counter. There seemed to be far more ants than needed to take the cookie crumbs, but perhaps the ants did not seem to care. Perhaps it was their way of combining work and play. Grab a few crumbs, chat with a few buddies, get outside of the colony, etc. While each side maintains its innocence of the following events and it cannot be denied that the crumbs were there. The husband secretly suspected that it was the wife that left the crumbs, and the wife believed that the husband was the one at fault. Regardless of who was at fault, the damage was done. The ants were back with a vengeance.
Chapter Six - A new hope
The wife mercilessly yet lovingly teased her poor husband at his failed attempt at ant training, suggesting that perhaps ants could not be trained. The husband was quite despondent, muttering "But it should have worked." The couple was at their wits' end trying to figure out what to do, but it was around this time that the wife, at the husband's gentle prodding, began looking for a new place to move. A place that was perhaps free from the long reach of the ants' empire. With some research the wife discovered a new place they could get in a far off land called Irvine. It was a magical mystical place filled with magical bears, happy ducks, unicorns, but with no ants. The couple scrimped and saved over the next few months and was able to secure a deposit to buy their new home, leaving their current ant problems behind.
THE END
For those who wish to know there is a sequel called:
Revenge of the Sith(Ants)
This was all brought about by a posting on cnn.com today stating that ants can teach each other and learn.
http://www.cnn.com/2006/TECH/science/01/11/ants.teching.reut/index.html
Well sorry for the long post. Some may enjoy it more than others.