(no subject)
stolen from paige. i don't want to go to sleep because i want to keep listening to music, but i'm too tired to do anything but fill out a survey :p.
Your One Best friend -- aimee/erin
One person you would marry -- you mean like a real person, or like a rock star? i would honestly marry steven tyler or billy joel if given the chance. there's no one i actually know that i'd consider marrying. well, one person. but i don't want to talk about that.
One thing you regret -- not really socializing much in the beginning of the school year. now i'm just hopeless.
One thing you will never regret - i will never regret being financially irresponsible and selfish by going to so many shows this year. soo amazing.
One Person who made the biggest impact on your life -- mrs joyce
One reason to wake up each day -- because what's the alternative?
Next..
Something important on your desk: my ticket stubs
When you sleep you wear: sweats and a t-shirt
If you could afford it at the moment, you would buy: i hate saying this, but more tickets
Something you don't have a lot of: nyu friends. i kind of JUST noticed that yesterday though. i don't know where i've been.
MORALS
If there were no side effects, you would enjoy being addicted to: i'm already addicted to aerosmith/live music. i used to joke about it, but i really think it's an addiction. a day or two after an aero show i literally get sick thinking about not having another one. i shake and get dizzy and it's just bad. but i enjoy it anyway, so i'm not sure how to answer this.
A time when you purposely hurt someone emotionally: i think the only time i've ever really hurt someone on purpose was when i started screaming at my sister about her grades. oh, and last year i often tried to hurt harrison (nationals!), but i'm not sure i was ever successful.
A time you accidentally hurt someone emotionally: i'd rather not write about those times here
One person you have killed in your thoughts: my cousin ronnie is the only one
FRIENDS
Three traits you look for in a friend: insanity (really though, i like f*cked up people), humor, loyalty
Who makes you laugh most often: harrison...that catwalk quote...god
A friend who you can tell anything: aimee
A friend you can go to for advice: aimee
The best piece of advice you had been given: i don't remember the wording, but my grandmother basically told me to stop bitching and obsessing over things i have no control over. so simple and brilliant.
Two closest friends: aimee and erin
The friend who uses most of your energy: rachel
EGO
Your 3 best qualities: i'm somewhat intelligent, or at least i used to be; i'm considerate of others (even if i don't like them, so don't think the 3 worst qualities negates this), and i actually can't think of anything else. i wrote this in my journal last night, but i just haven't really been liking myself lately.
i really do like that i know how to listen to music though. it seems stupid, but i don't think a lot of people appreciate it to the same extent.
Your 3 worst qualities: lately i've been really lazy (or tired? i don't know, but it's getting bad), i'm often cold, and i'm so goddamn irritable.
Describe your ideal self : a lot more energetic, involved, intelligent, charismatic (i have virtually NO charisma), confident, better looking.
You are embarrassed when: i fail to do my work
The greatest physical pain you ever endured: cluster headaches. or charlie horses in the middle of the night, but those only last for a couple of minutes before you pass out from the pain. cluster headaches last like a month. the worst it's ever been was during the monticello tournament. i'm still kind of pissed that menick made me judge the final round. i really wasn't kidding about being in pain and high on vicodin. then that night it was the worst pain i've ever felt in my life and i sat in the hospital being injected with god only knows what all night.
The greatest emotional pain you ever endured: shit with my mother
Moment you are most ashamed of: pretty much my current lifestyle
Your best physical feature: i don't know. my eyes? i somemhow feel like i'm getting uglier too. argh. or maybe i'm PMSing.
Who/What makes you happy: live music
Who/what makes you sad: my utter lack of energy
EMOTIONS
Emotion you hide most: i guess...i don't know, loneliness? ha, i sound so pathetic in this entry. honestly though, this is just a recent thing that hit me, so don't think i'm this disgustingly melodramatic/pathetic/whatever.
The emotion you tend to experience most: haa. i'm completely bipolar, don't ask me that question. i still have the mood swings article harrison gave me when i was pissed at him for something.
The emotion you are feeling most lately: exhaustion--physically and emotionally
You have a huge amount of guilt regarding: spending all of my money on shows when people in this world are starving.
When you are angry you need: to tell my mother
When you are sentimental you need: i'm not really ever sentimental.
When you are in love you need: for it to be returned
MEMORIES
One of your most peaceful memories: playing with mrs. joyce's horse with harrison and medum over the summer
One of your most tragic memories: i guess my father dying, but a less severe incident a couple of years ago that i'm not discussing here
One of your angriest memories: nationals last year. i wanted to kill everyone and i'm still not sure why. i was angry about everything that ever happened in my life i just lost it. ahh, i still wish i could have that tournament to do over.
A memory that makes you laugh: when harrison fell over noye's back at bergenfield sophomore year. i'm sorry, it's still the funniest thing in the world. oh no, or maybe medum's pocahontas dance. i'm kind of freaked out at how far away that seems.
A memory that makes you happy: 5/6/05
Something someone can say or do that you find extremely attractive: sing
Something someone can say or do that you find unattractive: make fun of people
What you enjoy most about having a committed relationship: ahh, if only i've experienced that
FINALLY
If you had more time alone you would: i hate this, but probably sleep
If you had more patience you would: probably have more friends, ha. people just annoy me soo easily.
If you could change one thing about your physical appearance what would it be: umm either have bigger teeth or fix the weird bumps that are on my nose. people tell me they're normal, but i hate those side pocket thingss
If you had no commitments what would you be doing: i have no commitments that i take seriously. i mean, i go to work, but not much. i have to go to debate tomorrow. i guess i'd probably sleep in instead of doing that.
If you could have one super power what would it be: automatic energy
If you could start all over: how the hell am i supposed to answer that? i have no idea.
k, night.