LJ Idol Week Six - The Lightning Strike

[ohelectricshock]

Sometimes we become the villain of our own story. It's a curious thing, realizing that I have been an unreliable narrator of my own behaviour and decisions, of my own life. I have unknowingly possessed a destructive power to wound and shatter the same way I had been wounded and shattered. Weapons can be infinitely more dangerous when you don't

Comments

[bleodswean]

I'm truly enjoying watching this unfold and your subtle and not-subtle navigation of it. I hope you begin to talk more about your internalization - mental and emotional - regarding the shifts and rebalances.

This was nice. This especially - Sometimes we become the villain of our own story.

[ohelectricshock]

Thank you so much for this comment. I am definitely going to start focusing on that more I think as it goes on :) I am really enjoying this process even though it's so, so difficult for me to write about some of the things that happened.

[witches]

you're such a wonderful storyteller. your way with words is amazing

[ohelectricshock]

Aww thank you so much! This makes me feel so happy <3

[reckless_blues]

Jeez. How do people even do polyamory? I'm always kind of shocked when I manage to find even one person who's willing to sleep with me.

True that you're often the villain in your story, though - you're always the one who's caused the most problems in your own life.

[ohelectricshock]

I have definitely seen it work to varying degrees of success, but it is never an easy thing, and in this situation I think that even though I convinced myself that I thought we were in a good, healthy place to begin this journey from, in hindsight I was definitely fooling myself and it ended up causing both of us a lot of pain and heartbreak.

That is a very good point :) I think it was just kind of a turning point in regards to our relationship because now I was the one doing the hurting.

[kagomeshuko]

Nice.

[ohelectricshock]

Thank you!

[eska818]

Still reading, and still finding this story ridiculously compelling. I love the way you tell it - I feel every bit of pain and confusion and betrayal. It's terrible to me that it's a true story, but I guess sometimes the best stories come from our own tragedies.

[ohelectricshock]

It's so true, this story is getting so much harder to write as I go deeper. I am so glad that you are reading though and finding it to be a story worth telling :) It's been a very interesting experience for me to get it all out there in print form for anyone to read. Thanks so much <3