there is something about looking at things up close ( Read more... )

who gets to call the shots when no one has lived this before?  whos to say whats right and whats wrong when there is no precedent, no rule book, no guidelines.  there is really no way to reach me.  because im not there. im not just anywhere, only here. i can only be here, with me, by me, in me.  i can only trust in whats here.  whats by me, whats ( Read more... )

here now. with shorter hair and a longer list of acheivements.  pushing for perfection i forget that i am so far off.  my life is really another's, i swear, i only direct it, poorly.  an infinite reality will surface someday, someday.  until then i am writing a script full of holes that is so inconsistant it could be funny, should be funny.  but it ( Read more... )

sad face.

or...apathetic face?

i dont know.

in the words of Ms Clarice: "something is not right"

its been amazing, eye-opening, comforting, exhilerating, breathtaking, solidifying, stimulating....prefect.

the waves have calmed. i am solid. i am safe. we are solid.

i feel good.

and i still have a 4.0 :P

its beennn a whiilleee ( Read more... )

she counts each crack in the cement and matches each with the cracks in her skin. to feel imperfect is to know your alive, but being alive is the worst burden ever. instead she walks on air molecules so she doesnt have to realize the cracks. each would send the electricity of reality through her. the tissues of her mind and her heart are ( Read more... )

will you ever listen to her? You'll never listen to her. A fail-safe gone wrong; fueled by the pain made for a warning. the struggle is made a spectical, a laughing stock, a punishment. bare the shame and shove it deeper. work it in/back away. cripple yourself/pull yourself up. push it farther/run away. listen to her pleas; happiness with puppy ( Read more... )

this night was supposed to be awesome.

but now im crying

why wasnt she as excited for this as I was?

what the fuck happened to us?

this night was supposed to be awesome.

but now im crying

why wasnt she as excited for this as I was?

what the fuck happened?