Tell Me When You Hear My Heart Stop (2/2)
Title: Tell Me When Your Hear My Heart Stop (2/2)
Author: justanerdyangel
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,284
Author's Notes: Special thanks still goes out to my friend Abby for being my beta. You rock! "Hic angelus non jam est ad me astrictum." loosely translates to "This angel is no longer bound to me."
The next day, Dean woke up to Castiel sitting at the foot of the bed, fully dressed in his traditional clothes with the exception of the trench coat. "Good morning, Dean," Cas said as he leaned forward, his hands clasped and head lowered, as if he were saying a silent prayer.
"Are you praying that what happened last night would happen again?" Dean asked, a smirk appearing on his face as he tossed the covers off of him to get dressed. He pulled out a fresh pair of jeans and a t-shirt from his duffel bag, and pulled on the jeans first, his eyes fixated on Castiel.
Castiel raised his head and looked behind him, just before Dean had put on the shirt, his blue eyes piercing green ones before breaking the gaze and letting his eyes roam down Dean's chest and towards where the most incredible dick that ever fucked him was hidden behind the thick denim, thinking about the previous night’s events before meeting the hunter’s eyes again. "Perhaps," Cas replied, going back to his silent prayer. What they had done the night before was so wrong and went against everything Castiel knew, but yet, oh so right. What the angel was praying for though, was that he would be able to locate God without going on an almost two year search for him.
While Cas' eyes were on him, Dean's were on the angel. More importantly, they were staring at that sinful ass covered in the beige material that was too good to belong to an angel before moving to stare at the slight bulge in his pants. Dean snapped back when he felt Cas' eyes move to meet his own again. "Perhaps?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Perhaps," Castiel answered.
Whatever 'perhaps' meant, Dean didn't take it as a yes or no. He shrugged his shoulders a little bit and finished getting dressed, and before long, the pair was in the Impala and out on the road again, finishing the drive up to Bobby's. It was raining, almost like all of heaven was weeping the loss of Sam. But that wasn't the case - they were mourning the loss of their fallen brother, trapped in the cage with Sam - or Lucifer - for all of eternity. The ride was silent, save for the music that came out of the car's speakers on a low volume that felt weird to Dean, but he knew Cas' intolerance to loud music. There was so much that both of them wanted to say. Where did they stand? What was going to happen now? Those questions, and so many others, swam around in Dean's mind. He opened his mouth a few times to ask Cas, but shut it. Cas was going back to heaven to stop the anarchy that was happening, to restore peace to their home.
~*~
Dean pulled the car into Bobby's driveway and gave the horn a honk, singling his arrival. The Impala’s tires crunched around the rocks as it drove up, and soon approached Bobby's home where Dean parked it. "I guess this is goodbye," he said, looking over at Castiel. "With you going back to heaven and all."
Castiel looked at Dean with sad, almost puppy-like eyes. "As much as I want to stay here with you, I was also thinking a lot about that during the night while you slept. I do have to go back, Dean. They need me." With that statement, the angel leaned over the middle console and placed a gentle kiss on Dean's mouth. "I will never forget you, Dean Winchester." Then he vanished with the faint sound of wing beats in the air.
Dean got out of the car, and headed to the front door, kicking a rock in the process. He rang the doorbell, and waited for Bobby to answer. Turning his back and looking up to the sky, he cursed loudly. "Damn it, Cas! I needed you! I thought you weren’t going back? What happened to that, huh?! I lo-"
His rant and confession was cut off as the door swung open, and Bobby stood across the threshold. "Dean," he said gently to the other hunter's backside. Dean turned around, and looked at his surrogate father. "Bobby."
"Come on inside," Bobby said. "Where's Castiel at?" he asked, looking for the angel who had kindly gave him his life back.
"He left, Bobby. Left to go back to heaven and take care of business up there," Dean replied, walking inside the home.
Bobby shut the door behind Dean after giving the yard a once over and turned to face Dean. "Looks like it's just you and me then, kid."
"Yeah, it's just you and me, Bobby, the last of our hunter family that we’ve built. Ellen, Jo, Sam, Cas...they're all gone, and not coming back."
~*~
Castiel never did return to heaven. Instead, he found God in the form of Chuck at his home. The wing beats where practically deafening to Chuck's human ears, but to God, they were nothing more than sounds of a son or daughter’s arrival or departure.
"Father," Cas started, genuflecting and lowering his head before God who was sitting in front of a computer with a pair of glasses perched on his nose. "I have something that I deeply need to ask of you."
An eyebrow rose on God’s forehead in surprise as the gold studded brown leather chair swiveled around, now facing the kneeling angel. "Castiel," God said. "What can I do for you, son?" he asked, looking down upon his son’s bed head mess of hair.
Castiel raised his head and stood. It was now or never to ask as the angel cleared his throat. "Father, you’ve given me so much, but I cannot return to heaven with you. I have found love here on Earth, and would like to become human."
God contemplated Castiel’s request for a few moments, taking a sip of his scotch as he did so. "So you fell in love with Dean Winchester," he said, the statement coming out more or less than a question than anything.
The angel nodded slowly. "I did, Father. I'm...I'm not sure how he feels about me, but I love him with every fiber of my being. He's too important to me. I'd rather give up everything and live here on earth, than to have to go back home and never let him know how I feel."
"I see," the creator said. "Castiel, you do realize that if I do grant this request of you, you won't be able to ever return to heaven if it doesn't work out between the two of you."
Cas nodded again. "I do understand."
God stretched out an arm, as if beckoning Castiel to him. The angel stepped closer to his father, and kneeled in front of him, lowering his head again. Placing a hand on top of Castiel’s head, God spoke in perfect Latin, "Hic angelus nom jam est ad me astrictum." The glow of Castiel's grace appeared in the creator's hand, and the angel hung his head lower, blue eyes shut tight. "You may rise, Castiel."
The now-former angel rose to his feet again, and looked upon the face of God. "Thank you, Father," he said as he turned his back and started walking towards the front door.
"Castiel," God said. "There is something else I can do for you."
Cas turned around and faced his father again, his head tilted in slight confusion. "You already gave me what I asked for. There isn't anything else I could ask for."
God let out a chuckle and shook his head slightly. "Castiel, I can send you to Dean. He's at Bobby's, yes? Just know that this will be the last time you'll see me, or any of your brothers or sisters."
Blue eyes blinked, and his head gave a nod as Castiel walked back towards God. "I know." With that, God pressed two fingers against Cas' forehead, sending him to Bobby's home.
~*~
Inside the house, Dean and Bobby sat, each with a beer, and talked about what happened after Lucifer killed Bobby. "I'm telling you, Bobby. Sam had this weird look on his face right before he took control of Lucifer. It was like he was having an internal struggle with himself," Dean said before taking a pull off his bottle. It still wasn't easy for the older brother to talk about what happened. He lost his younger brother, the one he was supposed to look after and protect.
Bobby opened his mouth to speak when the doorbell rang. Dean's eyes widened a little at the hope that it would be Castiel deciding that he needed to stay, or Sammy, though the latter was damn near impossible. The elder of the two got up from his chair and made his way to the front of the house. When he opened the door, Bobby’s eyes grew wide.
"Castiel?" he asked in surprise. "Dean said..."
"Dean was wrong. I didn't return to heaven. I went to see God," Castiel stated as he walked into the house. Bobby shut the door, and was close behind him. "I'm not an angel, or a demon, Bobby. I’m human."
Dean heard voices in the living room, and went to investigate what was going on. His eyes grew wide and his jaw slacked a little at the sight in front of him. "Cas?" he questioned. "I thought you had to go back to heaven?"
Cas walked towards Dean. "I didn't go. I promised you that I wouldn't. I would have broken that promise if I did. I seeked out God and found him. I'm not an angel, or a demon. I'm not a shape-shifter, an apparition, or an unhappy spirit. I'm human, Dean. I gave up all my powers, all of my grace, for you."
Dean was flabbergasted. "You gave up your idea of paradise for me?"
A nod came from the former angel. "Dean Winchester, I love you. Have for a very long time, ever since I dragged you out of hell."
Dean stared at Cas, unblinking. They locked eyes again as Dean took a step to close the gap between them, and said, "I love you too, Cas. I think last night proved that." With those words, Dean leaned closer to his partner's face, placing a kiss on Castiel's lips, so full of passion, love and happiness, although he was still grieving over Sam's death on the inside.
The sound of someone clearing their throat was what snapped both of them back, realizing that they were in Bobby's living room, making out. Both faces flushed with a light pink blush in their cheeks, and Dean wrapped an arm around Castiel's waist, turning to look at Bobby.
"I guess it's not just you and me anymore, Dean," Bobby mentioned, a rare smile on his face.
"Nope, it's not," Dean replied, a similar smile appearing as he looked at Cas and placed a small kiss on his lover's lips.
~*~
One year later to the day that they were reunited at Bobby's, Dean and Castiel were married at a chapel in Vegas, as much as Dean protested to it. He would have rather just had a simple ceremony in front of a local justice of the peace, but when Cas looked at him with those big blue puppy eyes, Dean couldn't argue. Bobby paid for their honeymoon, a trip to Disneyland, saying something about how Dean needed to relax and told Cas to make sure that he took Dean on It's a Small World to get the song stuck in his head.
The couple had bought a house not far from Bobby's, but still far enough to have some privacy of their own. They slowly grew adjusted to living a normal life and stopped hunting. Castiel got a job as a tax accountant, and Dean went to work as a mechanic, freelancing when there wasn't steady employment. Ten years after, in early August, the Hell Hounds came for Bobby because of the deal that he and Crowley made. By the time Dean and Castiel got there, it was too late - Bobby's body had been torn to shreds. It was up to them to salt and burn their friend's corpse. Dean and Castiel sold the home that they were living in, and moved into Bobby's, knowing that he would have wanted them to have it.
Forty years afterward on one crisp fall evening in October, when they were both old and graying, Dean and Castiel laid in bed, holding onto one another, much like they did on the very first time after they had sex. Sam's song came on Cas' iPod that was plugged into a bedside dock, and Castiel looked at Dean. "Tell me when you hear my heart stop." With those last words, Cas closed his eyes, and died in his lover's arms.
"Cas? Cas, wake up. Wake up, come on. You can't leave me, you can't," Dean begged as tears started streaming down his face in sobs. "You can't do this to me."
But Castiel never did wake up. Dean took a pillow and blanket from the room, and went downstairs in the old house, sitting on the couch and wrapping the blanket around him, the sobs taking over him. Dean was alone, and was destined to live that way until he died.
The day after Castiel, the angel-turned-human, died, Dean carried his body down the stairs and outside to the grave that he dug during the night. He placed his lover's corpse down into a pine box, and lowered the box into the earth. "I love you, Cas. And I'll see you soon."
Soundtrack here!
Author: justanerdyangel
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,284
Author's Notes: Special thanks still goes out to my friend Abby for being my beta. You rock! "Hic angelus non jam est ad me astrictum." loosely translates to "This angel is no longer bound to me."
The next day, Dean woke up to Castiel sitting at the foot of the bed, fully dressed in his traditional clothes with the exception of the trench coat. "Good morning, Dean," Cas said as he leaned forward, his hands clasped and head lowered, as if he were saying a silent prayer.
"Are you praying that what happened last night would happen again?" Dean asked, a smirk appearing on his face as he tossed the covers off of him to get dressed. He pulled out a fresh pair of jeans and a t-shirt from his duffel bag, and pulled on the jeans first, his eyes fixated on Castiel.
Castiel raised his head and looked behind him, just before Dean had put on the shirt, his blue eyes piercing green ones before breaking the gaze and letting his eyes roam down Dean's chest and towards where the most incredible dick that ever fucked him was hidden behind the thick denim, thinking about the previous night’s events before meeting the hunter’s eyes again. "Perhaps," Cas replied, going back to his silent prayer. What they had done the night before was so wrong and went against everything Castiel knew, but yet, oh so right. What the angel was praying for though, was that he would be able to locate God without going on an almost two year search for him.
While Cas' eyes were on him, Dean's were on the angel. More importantly, they were staring at that sinful ass covered in the beige material that was too good to belong to an angel before moving to stare at the slight bulge in his pants. Dean snapped back when he felt Cas' eyes move to meet his own again. "Perhaps?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Perhaps," Castiel answered.
Whatever 'perhaps' meant, Dean didn't take it as a yes or no. He shrugged his shoulders a little bit and finished getting dressed, and before long, the pair was in the Impala and out on the road again, finishing the drive up to Bobby's. It was raining, almost like all of heaven was weeping the loss of Sam. But that wasn't the case - they were mourning the loss of their fallen brother, trapped in the cage with Sam - or Lucifer - for all of eternity. The ride was silent, save for the music that came out of the car's speakers on a low volume that felt weird to Dean, but he knew Cas' intolerance to loud music. There was so much that both of them wanted to say. Where did they stand? What was going to happen now? Those questions, and so many others, swam around in Dean's mind. He opened his mouth a few times to ask Cas, but shut it. Cas was going back to heaven to stop the anarchy that was happening, to restore peace to their home.
~*~
Dean pulled the car into Bobby's driveway and gave the horn a honk, singling his arrival. The Impala’s tires crunched around the rocks as it drove up, and soon approached Bobby's home where Dean parked it. "I guess this is goodbye," he said, looking over at Castiel. "With you going back to heaven and all."
Castiel looked at Dean with sad, almost puppy-like eyes. "As much as I want to stay here with you, I was also thinking a lot about that during the night while you slept. I do have to go back, Dean. They need me." With that statement, the angel leaned over the middle console and placed a gentle kiss on Dean's mouth. "I will never forget you, Dean Winchester." Then he vanished with the faint sound of wing beats in the air.
Dean got out of the car, and headed to the front door, kicking a rock in the process. He rang the doorbell, and waited for Bobby to answer. Turning his back and looking up to the sky, he cursed loudly. "Damn it, Cas! I needed you! I thought you weren’t going back? What happened to that, huh?! I lo-"
His rant and confession was cut off as the door swung open, and Bobby stood across the threshold. "Dean," he said gently to the other hunter's backside. Dean turned around, and looked at his surrogate father. "Bobby."
"Come on inside," Bobby said. "Where's Castiel at?" he asked, looking for the angel who had kindly gave him his life back.
"He left, Bobby. Left to go back to heaven and take care of business up there," Dean replied, walking inside the home.
Bobby shut the door behind Dean after giving the yard a once over and turned to face Dean. "Looks like it's just you and me then, kid."
"Yeah, it's just you and me, Bobby, the last of our hunter family that we’ve built. Ellen, Jo, Sam, Cas...they're all gone, and not coming back."
~*~
Castiel never did return to heaven. Instead, he found God in the form of Chuck at his home. The wing beats where practically deafening to Chuck's human ears, but to God, they were nothing more than sounds of a son or daughter’s arrival or departure.
"Father," Cas started, genuflecting and lowering his head before God who was sitting in front of a computer with a pair of glasses perched on his nose. "I have something that I deeply need to ask of you."
An eyebrow rose on God’s forehead in surprise as the gold studded brown leather chair swiveled around, now facing the kneeling angel. "Castiel," God said. "What can I do for you, son?" he asked, looking down upon his son’s bed head mess of hair.
Castiel raised his head and stood. It was now or never to ask as the angel cleared his throat. "Father, you’ve given me so much, but I cannot return to heaven with you. I have found love here on Earth, and would like to become human."
God contemplated Castiel’s request for a few moments, taking a sip of his scotch as he did so. "So you fell in love with Dean Winchester," he said, the statement coming out more or less than a question than anything.
The angel nodded slowly. "I did, Father. I'm...I'm not sure how he feels about me, but I love him with every fiber of my being. He's too important to me. I'd rather give up everything and live here on earth, than to have to go back home and never let him know how I feel."
"I see," the creator said. "Castiel, you do realize that if I do grant this request of you, you won't be able to ever return to heaven if it doesn't work out between the two of you."
Cas nodded again. "I do understand."
God stretched out an arm, as if beckoning Castiel to him. The angel stepped closer to his father, and kneeled in front of him, lowering his head again. Placing a hand on top of Castiel’s head, God spoke in perfect Latin, "Hic angelus nom jam est ad me astrictum." The glow of Castiel's grace appeared in the creator's hand, and the angel hung his head lower, blue eyes shut tight. "You may rise, Castiel."
The now-former angel rose to his feet again, and looked upon the face of God. "Thank you, Father," he said as he turned his back and started walking towards the front door.
"Castiel," God said. "There is something else I can do for you."
Cas turned around and faced his father again, his head tilted in slight confusion. "You already gave me what I asked for. There isn't anything else I could ask for."
God let out a chuckle and shook his head slightly. "Castiel, I can send you to Dean. He's at Bobby's, yes? Just know that this will be the last time you'll see me, or any of your brothers or sisters."
Blue eyes blinked, and his head gave a nod as Castiel walked back towards God. "I know." With that, God pressed two fingers against Cas' forehead, sending him to Bobby's home.
~*~
Inside the house, Dean and Bobby sat, each with a beer, and talked about what happened after Lucifer killed Bobby. "I'm telling you, Bobby. Sam had this weird look on his face right before he took control of Lucifer. It was like he was having an internal struggle with himself," Dean said before taking a pull off his bottle. It still wasn't easy for the older brother to talk about what happened. He lost his younger brother, the one he was supposed to look after and protect.
Bobby opened his mouth to speak when the doorbell rang. Dean's eyes widened a little at the hope that it would be Castiel deciding that he needed to stay, or Sammy, though the latter was damn near impossible. The elder of the two got up from his chair and made his way to the front of the house. When he opened the door, Bobby’s eyes grew wide.
"Castiel?" he asked in surprise. "Dean said..."
"Dean was wrong. I didn't return to heaven. I went to see God," Castiel stated as he walked into the house. Bobby shut the door, and was close behind him. "I'm not an angel, or a demon, Bobby. I’m human."
Dean heard voices in the living room, and went to investigate what was going on. His eyes grew wide and his jaw slacked a little at the sight in front of him. "Cas?" he questioned. "I thought you had to go back to heaven?"
Cas walked towards Dean. "I didn't go. I promised you that I wouldn't. I would have broken that promise if I did. I seeked out God and found him. I'm not an angel, or a demon. I'm not a shape-shifter, an apparition, or an unhappy spirit. I'm human, Dean. I gave up all my powers, all of my grace, for you."
Dean was flabbergasted. "You gave up your idea of paradise for me?"
A nod came from the former angel. "Dean Winchester, I love you. Have for a very long time, ever since I dragged you out of hell."
Dean stared at Cas, unblinking. They locked eyes again as Dean took a step to close the gap between them, and said, "I love you too, Cas. I think last night proved that." With those words, Dean leaned closer to his partner's face, placing a kiss on Castiel's lips, so full of passion, love and happiness, although he was still grieving over Sam's death on the inside.
The sound of someone clearing their throat was what snapped both of them back, realizing that they were in Bobby's living room, making out. Both faces flushed with a light pink blush in their cheeks, and Dean wrapped an arm around Castiel's waist, turning to look at Bobby.
"I guess it's not just you and me anymore, Dean," Bobby mentioned, a rare smile on his face.
"Nope, it's not," Dean replied, a similar smile appearing as he looked at Cas and placed a small kiss on his lover's lips.
~*~
One year later to the day that they were reunited at Bobby's, Dean and Castiel were married at a chapel in Vegas, as much as Dean protested to it. He would have rather just had a simple ceremony in front of a local justice of the peace, but when Cas looked at him with those big blue puppy eyes, Dean couldn't argue. Bobby paid for their honeymoon, a trip to Disneyland, saying something about how Dean needed to relax and told Cas to make sure that he took Dean on It's a Small World to get the song stuck in his head.
The couple had bought a house not far from Bobby's, but still far enough to have some privacy of their own. They slowly grew adjusted to living a normal life and stopped hunting. Castiel got a job as a tax accountant, and Dean went to work as a mechanic, freelancing when there wasn't steady employment. Ten years after, in early August, the Hell Hounds came for Bobby because of the deal that he and Crowley made. By the time Dean and Castiel got there, it was too late - Bobby's body had been torn to shreds. It was up to them to salt and burn their friend's corpse. Dean and Castiel sold the home that they were living in, and moved into Bobby's, knowing that he would have wanted them to have it.
Forty years afterward on one crisp fall evening in October, when they were both old and graying, Dean and Castiel laid in bed, holding onto one another, much like they did on the very first time after they had sex. Sam's song came on Cas' iPod that was plugged into a bedside dock, and Castiel looked at Dean. "Tell me when you hear my heart stop." With those last words, Cas closed his eyes, and died in his lover's arms.
"Cas? Cas, wake up. Wake up, come on. You can't leave me, you can't," Dean begged as tears started streaming down his face in sobs. "You can't do this to me."
But Castiel never did wake up. Dean took a pillow and blanket from the room, and went downstairs in the old house, sitting on the couch and wrapping the blanket around him, the sobs taking over him. Dean was alone, and was destined to live that way until he died.
The day after Castiel, the angel-turned-human, died, Dean carried his body down the stairs and outside to the grave that he dug during the night. He placed his lover's corpse down into a pine box, and lowered the box into the earth. "I love you, Cas. And I'll see you soon."
Soundtrack here!