016 ￥
[ Unhackable; ]
Hm... That was the second curse to befall me that I have found truly unpleasant in aftermath. True, a few days have now passed since that event however I believe that my discontent from looking back on it all still remains.
Were we still at home would I indeed be looking into my First Year Modules Schedule at med school as par request of my father? Of course not. Because I have surpassed that hurdle far sooner than I was supposed to. I exceeded my brothers, claimed the family company and then rejected it.
The curse showed some truths I already knew, some fears I knew existed and showed me a glimpse of what could have been. And yes, I envied him, the fool-king Tamaki Suou. Envied how overnight he could have the family's whole company if he worked for it, and yet he threw it back in my face. The one who wasn't working hard enough for what they wanted was I.
He was right. Damned idiot was right.
And because of that damned idiot I am now in a position upon return to fall into whatever future I choose.
I can work with stocks and shares, manage budgets, assess and overview matters from the shadows and yet ultimately I will never be able to find a way to repay him.
Damned fool. I am forever indebted to a fool.
... There are worse fates to befall someone. Such as falling in line unquestioningly for the family business when there can be so much more.
Terrifyingly, I have no idea where this fool will take us. Even more shocking still is the thought that I know we will follow, despite any protest we present. I use a plural for I refuse to believe I'm the only one caught up in his hurricane. The twins, Hunny-senpai, Mori-senpai, and Haruhi to some extent.
Yet she has her own dreams. I wonder if then a hurricane will calm and follow a light breeze instead. I wonder...
We shall see.
Hmm... Speaking of which.
Hunny-senpai.
Mori-senpai.
...and now Haruhi, too.
The question now is whether I tell him. Or wait for him to find out. Or be surprised that he knew before I did.
Éclair Tonnerre's presence in the City has certainly not gone unnoticed, either. Monitoring her seems the best course of action. Simply put I am not as forgiving as he. I have and will be watching her for I will not allow history to repeat. The Host Club exists for the happiness of women, but not at his expense. I will not allow it.
On a debatably lighter note it seems Renge has graced our fair streets. I have no idea how this bodes for us, but we shall see.
...
Again relating to the curse I am left with a wondering of the situation as it stands, my moonlighting, and the irony of it all. To maintain the things I enjoy I must endure the things I dislike.
One part of me says I should come clean, yet this comes with the impression that I've done something wrong. Perhaps I have. Maybe it is a kind of betrayal. If it is then I am truly a terrible person. Our code is unspoken and as wordlessly as it has been set I have broken it. It feels like I am cheating on a lover and I am musing on how to approach confessing it. How disconcerting.
The other side of my brain says I have done nothing wrong and I am doing this only because we do not have the finical float we had in our own world, that the Club alone does not bring the kind of money that we need to survive.
If I am the "mother" I am entitled to a few secrets, surely. It is the same principle that the children must think Christmas appears by magic when in fact there is more preparation behind it then they could ever imagine.
Yet the baseline sets me on edge. Our trust is unspoken. I broke it.
I am, regardless of the fine arguments I can present in my favour, feeling rather undeserving of the position I have somehow obtained. I am not accustomed to guilt. It is nauseating.
Hmm...
---
[ Private to Tamaki; ]
She is no--
Haruhi is no longer--
Perhaps we should do a head count--
... I know you better than this. What am I thinking.
Tamaki.
---
Miss Kuromi. My apologies for my unspeakably rude behaviour during the last curse when we spoke. It was terrible of me how could I forget such a bunny face were I in my own mind. I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me.
Kaoru, I shall assume that you are no longer Kaoru and a clone, shall I?
Hikaru, do I assume the same?
Kinomoto-kun, while I was under the influence of the curse when we were introduced I would like to venture that it was pleasant to speak with you indeed and additionally for my ignorance I offer my apologies. In retrospect your situation makes a great deal of sense. Some of the information I offered you is, however, inaccurate. For example, the schedule in general and my current stance on the school to work progression. Again, my apologies for any confusion caused.
Miss, I did not catch your name during the curse but again I feel my ignorance during that day may have come across as rude. In a state of clarity I would like to express a degree of curiosity toward your field, assuming of course that you were not cursed also and once more my deepest apologies for any stubborn ignorance that may have caused me to appear unnecessarily callous toward the area of discussion.
...today there appear to be fairies and panic. Another day in the City, is it not?
Hm... That was the second curse to befall me that I have found truly unpleasant in aftermath. True, a few days have now passed since that event however I believe that my discontent from looking back on it all still remains.
Were we still at home would I indeed be looking into my First Year Modules Schedule at med school as par request of my father? Of course not. Because I have surpassed that hurdle far sooner than I was supposed to. I exceeded my brothers, claimed the family company and then rejected it.
The curse showed some truths I already knew, some fears I knew existed and showed me a glimpse of what could have been. And yes, I envied him, the fool-king Tamaki Suou. Envied how overnight he could have the family's whole company if he worked for it, and yet he threw it back in my face. The one who wasn't working hard enough for what they wanted was I.
He was right. Damned idiot was right.
And because of that damned idiot I am now in a position upon return to fall into whatever future I choose.
I can work with stocks and shares, manage budgets, assess and overview matters from the shadows and yet ultimately I will never be able to find a way to repay him.
Damned fool. I am forever indebted to a fool.
... There are worse fates to befall someone. Such as falling in line unquestioningly for the family business when there can be so much more.
Terrifyingly, I have no idea where this fool will take us. Even more shocking still is the thought that I know we will follow, despite any protest we present. I use a plural for I refuse to believe I'm the only one caught up in his hurricane. The twins, Hunny-senpai, Mori-senpai, and Haruhi to some extent.
Yet she has her own dreams. I wonder if then a hurricane will calm and follow a light breeze instead. I wonder...
We shall see.
Hmm... Speaking of which.
Hunny-senpai.
Mori-senpai.
...and now Haruhi, too.
The question now is whether I tell him. Or wait for him to find out. Or be surprised that he knew before I did.
Éclair Tonnerre's presence in the City has certainly not gone unnoticed, either. Monitoring her seems the best course of action. Simply put I am not as forgiving as he. I have and will be watching her for I will not allow history to repeat. The Host Club exists for the happiness of women, but not at his expense. I will not allow it.
On a debatably lighter note it seems Renge has graced our fair streets. I have no idea how this bodes for us, but we shall see.
...
Again relating to the curse I am left with a wondering of the situation as it stands, my moonlighting, and the irony of it all. To maintain the things I enjoy I must endure the things I dislike.
One part of me says I should come clean, yet this comes with the impression that I've done something wrong. Perhaps I have. Maybe it is a kind of betrayal. If it is then I am truly a terrible person. Our code is unspoken and as wordlessly as it has been set I have broken it. It feels like I am cheating on a lover and I am musing on how to approach confessing it. How disconcerting.
The other side of my brain says I have done nothing wrong and I am doing this only because we do not have the finical float we had in our own world, that the Club alone does not bring the kind of money that we need to survive.
If I am the "mother" I am entitled to a few secrets, surely. It is the same principle that the children must think Christmas appears by magic when in fact there is more preparation behind it then they could ever imagine.
Yet the baseline sets me on edge. Our trust is unspoken. I broke it.
I am, regardless of the fine arguments I can present in my favour, feeling rather undeserving of the position I have somehow obtained. I am not accustomed to guilt. It is nauseating.
Hmm...
---
[ Private to Tamaki; ]
She is no--
Haruhi is no longer--
Perhaps we should do a head count--
... I know you better than this. What am I thinking.
Tamaki.
---
Miss Kuromi. My apologies for my unspeakably rude behaviour during the last curse when we spoke. It was terrible of me how could I forget such a bunny face were I in my own mind. I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me.
Kaoru, I shall assume that you are no longer Kaoru and a clone, shall I?
Hikaru, do I assume the same?
Kinomoto-kun, while I was under the influence of the curse when we were introduced I would like to venture that it was pleasant to speak with you indeed and additionally for my ignorance I offer my apologies. In retrospect your situation makes a great deal of sense. Some of the information I offered you is, however, inaccurate. For example, the schedule in general and my current stance on the school to work progression. Again, my apologies for any confusion caused.
Miss, I did not catch your name during the curse but again I feel my ignorance during that day may have come across as rude. In a state of clarity I would like to express a degree of curiosity toward your field, assuming of course that you were not cursed also and once more my deepest apologies for any stubborn ignorance that may have caused me to appear unnecessarily callous toward the area of discussion.
...today there appear to be fairies and panic. Another day in the City, is it not?