in memorium, with love

[olivia_circe]

I've been trying to figure out how to write this post since Saturday, which feels like yesterday and also like it was a year ago. Most of that "trying to figure it out" has been the familiar, comfortable avoidance of thinking about how to write this -- the meta, which is sometimes a retreat for me more than anything else -- because I wasn't ready

Comments

[eleanor_lavish]

I got to this: Maybe just because Gerard keeps killing Mikey, I don't know and I am now uncontrollably laugh-crying at you, lady.

I love you, and I am so, so grateful that this fandom - that bandom brought us together even in such an oblique sort of way, and I love how much you love, and how much you share and how fucking fearless you are sometimes (this post was fearless, do not ever think it wasn't) and I feel both relief and this intense guilt that I had mostly broken up with this band before they broke up with us, so my sadness is so different. Like nostalgia sadness, and sadness-by-proxy for all of you

[olivia_circe]

So I have been not replying to this comment because I love it and I love you and it makes me want to cry in all the good ways. But just -- thank you. Thank you for all of this. <333333333333333

[eleanor_lavish]

<3333333333

I am stupidly grateful to have you in my life, just so you know.

[olivia_circe]

Right back at you. <3333333333

[sunsetmog]

I love YOU. <3

[olivia_circe]

<3 <3 <3