Hero // Kis-My-Ft2
For celightd, from our discussion of how Kitayama would be a great wuxia (sort of like a wandering warrior/knight) in a Chinese historical drama.
Hero
Kitayama/Fujigaya
PG, 1061 words, AU
Of loneliness, and being a hero.
"You shall not go, Kitayama," Fujigaya ordered, slamming his hand down flat on the smooth redwood tabletop and making all the tea cups rattle. "I forbid you to go. It's official decree!"
Kitayama inclined his head respectfully, but there was a flat determination stamped onto his face that spoke louder than words of defiance.
"Mitsu-" Fujigaya began, but a quick look of warning from Kitayama reminded Fujigaya of the servants around them and he began again. "Kitayama, you're not bound to our state at all. You swore no allegiance to my father, you owe no debt of honor that requires you to sacrifice yourself in this way."
"I owe it to you," murmured Kitayama, so low that Fujigaya would not have heard if he hadn't been expecting those words.
Fujigaya felt a rush of emotion towards the swordsman that he'd met on his travels through the unclaimed territories in the past year. Kitayama had saved his life the first time they'd met, and then many times after that, for they had struck up a deep friendship and traveled a dangerous road together, fraught with highwaymen and assassins.
Then, after several seasons spent traveling together, Fujigaya had brought Kitayama back with him, to the splendid red-roofed palace he called home. "I belong to the open plains," Kitayama had objected, looking with distaste at the dirty streets of the capital city. But in the end he had come, giving in to Fujigaya's persuasive tongue that had whispered to him, "I need you with me."
Kitayama had been out of place in the gold-gilt rooms, choosing to remain garbed in the simple linens of a traveler rather than the embroidered silk robes Fujigaya had brought to him as gifts. Truthfully, Fujigaya was being selfish; he knew Kitayama wasn't happy here, but having Kitayama near had made Fujigaya feel good, feel free, like they had been under the open skies.
Yet, even though Kitayama had obviously been a misfit amongst the polished inhabitants of the palace, he'd never lost his sense of self. Even now, as Fujigaya looked down at his friend and protector, he could see the hard warrior's muscles under his shirt that spoke of even harder warrior's principles. There was something in Kitayama's bearing, the streak of stubborn pride that showed through even when he was kneeling in submission.
With a start, Fujigaya realized that Kitayama was still down on one knee at the entrance of the room. Fujigaya had been so vehement in his insistence that Kitayama should not throw himself to their enemies as a pawn in the military game his father was playing that he hadn't time to bid Kitayama rise to his feet yet.
"Stand, Kitayama. Stop kneeling in that foolish way," he commanded quickly. "There is no ceremony between us, you know that." Then he rose from his seat too, and with an impatient sweep of his arm dismissed the servants standing on the edges of the room. "Out, all of you!"
As soon as they were all gone, the last servant shutting the doors behind him carefully, Fujigaya strode to Kitayama and clasped him on the upper arm. "Mitsu, please. Don't do it."
"Taisuke-"
"You don't owe me anything, why should you think so? It is I who owe you my life, many times over. So now I'm telling you, if you go on this mission for my father, you will lose your life!"
Kitayama didn't respond, though he lost all the rigid formality in his bearing. Pulling out of Fujigaya's grasp, he went to the table and poured himself some tea. He wasn't graceful, but Fujigaya watched each movement avidly anyway, some innate sixth sense prompting him to memorize each detail and store it away in his heart. There was a long moment before Kitayama turned back to him to speak.
"A wise monk once told me that no man can be a hero who doesn't understand loneliness." Fujigaya thought he saw a flicker of sadness of Kitayama's eyes before a small smile chased it away. "I'm not a hero, Taisuke, and I don't hope to be one, but I understand loneliness. And thanks to you, I've come to understand love and companionship as well."
"I don't understand," said Fujigaya, though he did understand full well in his heart of hearts.
"Oh, Taisuke..." Kitayama's voice was so soft now that Fujigaya had to step closer to be able to hear. "You've shown me that life contains so much more than just loneliness and existence, which was all I knew before I met you.
"Your father's strategy is a good one, and if this maneuver succeeds, you and yours shall be the rulers of all this land, safe from the ravages of your enemies. Now, I have it in my power to give you this in return for the happiness you have shown me. How could I choose otherwise but to do this for you?"
Fujigaya bit down on his lip, hard. It was unfair. He wanted to rail at the world. He wanted to rain curses down on the unworthy father who had abandoned Kitayama as a child and consigned him to a life of loneliness, and tear into his own father who couldn't see past the drab clothing and nicked sword blade to see the true worth of his friend.
So instead he took his anger out on Kitayama. "I don't want it! I never said I wanted it! Not at the expense of losing you!" Without waiting for a response, he stormed out of the room, running to the stables to seek solace and inner peace in a long gallop over the hills.
Dusk had fallen by the time he got back. Of course Kitayama wasn't in his chamber anymore, but neither was he in his own rooms when Fujigaya sought him out to apologize, nor in the courtyard where he sometimes practiced his martial arts. In a sudden blaze of panic, Fujigaya rushed to his father's quarters, intent on demanding answers.
They were awaiting him in the form of his father's absence and his mother's sad eyes.
"Oh my dear," she said, embracing him as she hadn't done since he'd grown old enough to put on his very first set of scholar's robes. "Your warrior, he asked me to pass along this message: 'Love isn't something that can ever be lost.'"
Note(s):
1. The setting of the AU is loosely based on the Three Kingdoms period of historical China.
2. The lj cut text "若是英雄 怎么能不懂寂莫" means "if one is a hero, how can one not understand loneliness?" and comes from the song 曹操 by JJ Lin.
3. Why yes the title is a bad pun on Kitayama's name, har har. 8D
Hero
Kitayama/Fujigaya
PG, 1061 words, AU
Of loneliness, and being a hero.
"You shall not go, Kitayama," Fujigaya ordered, slamming his hand down flat on the smooth redwood tabletop and making all the tea cups rattle. "I forbid you to go. It's official decree!"
Kitayama inclined his head respectfully, but there was a flat determination stamped onto his face that spoke louder than words of defiance.
"Mitsu-" Fujigaya began, but a quick look of warning from Kitayama reminded Fujigaya of the servants around them and he began again. "Kitayama, you're not bound to our state at all. You swore no allegiance to my father, you owe no debt of honor that requires you to sacrifice yourself in this way."
"I owe it to you," murmured Kitayama, so low that Fujigaya would not have heard if he hadn't been expecting those words.
Fujigaya felt a rush of emotion towards the swordsman that he'd met on his travels through the unclaimed territories in the past year. Kitayama had saved his life the first time they'd met, and then many times after that, for they had struck up a deep friendship and traveled a dangerous road together, fraught with highwaymen and assassins.
Then, after several seasons spent traveling together, Fujigaya had brought Kitayama back with him, to the splendid red-roofed palace he called home. "I belong to the open plains," Kitayama had objected, looking with distaste at the dirty streets of the capital city. But in the end he had come, giving in to Fujigaya's persuasive tongue that had whispered to him, "I need you with me."
Kitayama had been out of place in the gold-gilt rooms, choosing to remain garbed in the simple linens of a traveler rather than the embroidered silk robes Fujigaya had brought to him as gifts. Truthfully, Fujigaya was being selfish; he knew Kitayama wasn't happy here, but having Kitayama near had made Fujigaya feel good, feel free, like they had been under the open skies.
Yet, even though Kitayama had obviously been a misfit amongst the polished inhabitants of the palace, he'd never lost his sense of self. Even now, as Fujigaya looked down at his friend and protector, he could see the hard warrior's muscles under his shirt that spoke of even harder warrior's principles. There was something in Kitayama's bearing, the streak of stubborn pride that showed through even when he was kneeling in submission.
With a start, Fujigaya realized that Kitayama was still down on one knee at the entrance of the room. Fujigaya had been so vehement in his insistence that Kitayama should not throw himself to their enemies as a pawn in the military game his father was playing that he hadn't time to bid Kitayama rise to his feet yet.
"Stand, Kitayama. Stop kneeling in that foolish way," he commanded quickly. "There is no ceremony between us, you know that." Then he rose from his seat too, and with an impatient sweep of his arm dismissed the servants standing on the edges of the room. "Out, all of you!"
As soon as they were all gone, the last servant shutting the doors behind him carefully, Fujigaya strode to Kitayama and clasped him on the upper arm. "Mitsu, please. Don't do it."
"Taisuke-"
"You don't owe me anything, why should you think so? It is I who owe you my life, many times over. So now I'm telling you, if you go on this mission for my father, you will lose your life!"
Kitayama didn't respond, though he lost all the rigid formality in his bearing. Pulling out of Fujigaya's grasp, he went to the table and poured himself some tea. He wasn't graceful, but Fujigaya watched each movement avidly anyway, some innate sixth sense prompting him to memorize each detail and store it away in his heart. There was a long moment before Kitayama turned back to him to speak.
"A wise monk once told me that no man can be a hero who doesn't understand loneliness." Fujigaya thought he saw a flicker of sadness of Kitayama's eyes before a small smile chased it away. "I'm not a hero, Taisuke, and I don't hope to be one, but I understand loneliness. And thanks to you, I've come to understand love and companionship as well."
"I don't understand," said Fujigaya, though he did understand full well in his heart of hearts.
"Oh, Taisuke..." Kitayama's voice was so soft now that Fujigaya had to step closer to be able to hear. "You've shown me that life contains so much more than just loneliness and existence, which was all I knew before I met you.
"Your father's strategy is a good one, and if this maneuver succeeds, you and yours shall be the rulers of all this land, safe from the ravages of your enemies. Now, I have it in my power to give you this in return for the happiness you have shown me. How could I choose otherwise but to do this for you?"
Fujigaya bit down on his lip, hard. It was unfair. He wanted to rail at the world. He wanted to rain curses down on the unworthy father who had abandoned Kitayama as a child and consigned him to a life of loneliness, and tear into his own father who couldn't see past the drab clothing and nicked sword blade to see the true worth of his friend.
So instead he took his anger out on Kitayama. "I don't want it! I never said I wanted it! Not at the expense of losing you!" Without waiting for a response, he stormed out of the room, running to the stables to seek solace and inner peace in a long gallop over the hills.
Dusk had fallen by the time he got back. Of course Kitayama wasn't in his chamber anymore, but neither was he in his own rooms when Fujigaya sought him out to apologize, nor in the courtyard where he sometimes practiced his martial arts. In a sudden blaze of panic, Fujigaya rushed to his father's quarters, intent on demanding answers.
They were awaiting him in the form of his father's absence and his mother's sad eyes.
"Oh my dear," she said, embracing him as she hadn't done since he'd grown old enough to put on his very first set of scholar's robes. "Your warrior, he asked me to pass along this message: 'Love isn't something that can ever be lost.'"
Note(s):
1. The setting of the AU is loosely based on the Three Kingdoms period of historical China.
2. The lj cut text "若是英雄 怎么能不懂寂莫" means "if one is a hero, how can one not understand loneliness?" and comes from the song 曹操 by JJ Lin.
3. Why yes the title is a bad pun on Kitayama's name, har har. 8D