The Adventures of Sherlock Holmikyun // EbiKisu
The Adventures of Sherlock Holmikyun (Case Studies in 100 Words)
Kawai, ABC-Z, Kis-my-ft2
PG, 100x9 words, crack & AU
For the prompt "When Kawai decides to be Sherlock Holmes for a day, everyone in Kis-my-ft2s dressing room (ofcourse that includes ABC-Z) gets interrogated. many interesting things are found out, but none of them are what Kawai actually wanted to know." at the Johnnys Jr Fic Meme.
Beginning
“WATSOOOON!” bellows Kawai from under a fake moustache that elicits a reaction from nobody in the Kis-My-Ft2 dressing room. Except Miyata, who scurries over to join him, producing a walking stick from the mysterious black space underneath his make-up table.
“Holmes!” Miyata beams. “Time for another case?”
“My dear Watson, I see that your faculty of reasoning has not entirely rusted away in the time that we have been inactive. Yes, indeed, it has come upon my attention that I and only I can shed light upon the dark mysteries that crowd the hallowed halls of this Jimusho! Come!”
I. The Case of the Sleeping Junior
“Hmmmm,” Kawai murmurs, stroking his moustache contemplatively and peering through an oversized magnifying glass at Kitayama’s closed eyelids. “Kitamitsuuu? Are you really sleeping?”
At his side, Miyata squints at the sleeping form as well, trying to look doctor-like.
“You know Watson, Tama-chan may have had a point here. I’ve written an extensive treatise on the twitching of the human eye during midday naps, and judging by the rate that Kitamitsu’s are going, he’s most certainly - ”
Suddenly, without opening his eyes, Kitayama grabs the magnifying glass out of Kawai’s hand and brains him with it. “Shut up, you talk too much.”
II. The Mystery of the Adult Magazine Subscription
Yara stares at Kawai, bemused. "What's he up to now?" he asks Goseki in a whisper.
The other grins back, looking secretive. "Trying to find out who put gay porn in Hasshi's bag."
Yara’s intrigued face makes Goseki burst out laughing, which in turn causes Kawai to whirl around and point an accusing finger at him. “You! Just admit it! It was you!”
As Goseki tries to get out a refusal around his laughter, Hashimoto bounces into the room excitedly waving around a little slip of paper. “Gocchi~ Look! I found another ero-ero magazine that I can subscribe to! ☆”
III. The Mystery of Tsukada’s Buns of Steel
“Hey, Fumito,” Tottsu says hesitantly, eyes shifting across the room continually to check if anybody is around. “I uh, have something I’d like you to investigate i-if you’re not too busy. B-but if you are, then that’s fine! You don’t have to - erm - well…”
Kawai looks questioningly up from where he’s idly filing his nails.
“Well you know, uh, how everyone says Tsuka-chan has b - um, buns of steel…”
“That’s true.”
“Well uh, could you check?”
“I told you, it’s true.”
“Hah?! How do you know?!”
Kawai raises an eyebrow pointedly in response.
Tottsu gasps dramatically in comprehension.
IV. The Nighttime Adventure of Tamamori’s Hair
The amount of time Tamamori spends on his hair after a concert is, in EbiKisu’s collective opinion, disproportionate to the amount of people who actually notice him on his way home. Tamamori, however, insists that people stare.
Kawai and Miyata decide to investigate this claim one night, following Tamamori at a discreet distance all the way back to his neighborhood.
The next morning, Tamamori bursts triumphantly in upon ABC-Z, saying “Hora, Kawai-kun, there were two stalker-sans looking at my hair last night!”
When Kawai pretends to not hear him, Tamamori turns to Miyata. “Miyacchi, one of them looked like you!”
V. The Adventure of the Birthing Sea Turtle
Walking into what he thought was an empty practice room, Senga comes upon Kawai and Takizawa-senpai watching a compilation of his own sea turtle impersonations on Shounen Club with slack-jawed concentration. He yelps and rushes over to stand with his arms out in front of the television screen.
“What are you doing?!”
“Oh, Sen-chan!” Takizawa beams a smile at him. “We were watching your sea turtle impersonations!”
“And trying to figure out why the noises you make sound so familiar,” adds Kawai.
“In other words, what kind of kinky pornos you watch!”
Senga can only slink away in utter mortification.
VI. The Case of the Disappearing Evidence
“Ehhhh? Again!?” Kawai looks around the Kis-My-Ft2 dressing room in bewilderment. “What happened to the bag of evidence I left on the table?! Who wiped off the footprint I found on that chair?! And took out the trash?!”
Nikaido looks up from comparing biceps with Senga and snickers at Kawai’s rage. He points to the closet, to which Kawai stomps over.
“Miyata! You were supposed to keep an eye on things!”
“I couldn’t stop him!” wails Miyata.
At that moment, Yokoo walks into the room with a dust rag and vacuum in his hands, and cheerful smile on his face.
VII. A Scandal Behind the Costume Racks
While getting a drink from the vending machine, a cell phone is shoved into Fujigaya’s face with a blurry photo on the screen. “How you do plan to explain this?” demands Kawai.
“Where’d you get that?” Fujigaya asks nervously.
“I have my ways, my friend, I have my ways. What were you doing with Kitayama behind the costume racks, hmmm?”
“You’ve got the wrong person.”
“Ohoho,” chortles Kawai, “Those are definitely your bangs.”
Fujigaya ducks his head, grabs his canned coffee, and rushes back to the Kisumai practice room. But then he turns and smirks. “Maybe, but that’s not Kitayama.”
Ending?
It is by no means unusual to see ABC-Z and Kis-My-Ft2 members coming and going from each others’ dressing rooms; but the day Goseki stomps in with a slouchy, black, felt hat over his eyes and drags Fujigaya away, a few eyebrows are raised in Kisumai. When, a moment later, they hear a door slam and three pairs of feet rushing over to their dressing room, someone is moved to comment.
“Um.” says Senga. “What?”
Hasshi jerks a thumb over his shoulder and explains, “Professor Moriarty and Irene Adler.”
Kitayama nods in perfect understanding and goes promptly back to sleep.
Kawai, ABC-Z, Kis-my-ft2
PG, 100x9 words, crack & AU
For the prompt "When Kawai decides to be Sherlock Holmes for a day, everyone in Kis-my-ft2s dressing room (ofcourse that includes ABC-Z) gets interrogated. many interesting things are found out, but none of them are what Kawai actually wanted to know." at the Johnnys Jr Fic Meme.
Beginning
“WATSOOOON!” bellows Kawai from under a fake moustache that elicits a reaction from nobody in the Kis-My-Ft2 dressing room. Except Miyata, who scurries over to join him, producing a walking stick from the mysterious black space underneath his make-up table.
“Holmes!” Miyata beams. “Time for another case?”
“My dear Watson, I see that your faculty of reasoning has not entirely rusted away in the time that we have been inactive. Yes, indeed, it has come upon my attention that I and only I can shed light upon the dark mysteries that crowd the hallowed halls of this Jimusho! Come!”
I. The Case of the Sleeping Junior
“Hmmmm,” Kawai murmurs, stroking his moustache contemplatively and peering through an oversized magnifying glass at Kitayama’s closed eyelids. “Kitamitsuuu? Are you really sleeping?”
At his side, Miyata squints at the sleeping form as well, trying to look doctor-like.
“You know Watson, Tama-chan may have had a point here. I’ve written an extensive treatise on the twitching of the human eye during midday naps, and judging by the rate that Kitamitsu’s are going, he’s most certainly - ”
Suddenly, without opening his eyes, Kitayama grabs the magnifying glass out of Kawai’s hand and brains him with it. “Shut up, you talk too much.”
II. The Mystery of the Adult Magazine Subscription
Yara stares at Kawai, bemused. "What's he up to now?" he asks Goseki in a whisper.
The other grins back, looking secretive. "Trying to find out who put gay porn in Hasshi's bag."
Yara’s intrigued face makes Goseki burst out laughing, which in turn causes Kawai to whirl around and point an accusing finger at him. “You! Just admit it! It was you!”
As Goseki tries to get out a refusal around his laughter, Hashimoto bounces into the room excitedly waving around a little slip of paper. “Gocchi~ Look! I found another ero-ero magazine that I can subscribe to! ☆”
III. The Mystery of Tsukada’s Buns of Steel
“Hey, Fumito,” Tottsu says hesitantly, eyes shifting across the room continually to check if anybody is around. “I uh, have something I’d like you to investigate i-if you’re not too busy. B-but if you are, then that’s fine! You don’t have to - erm - well…”
Kawai looks questioningly up from where he’s idly filing his nails.
“Well you know, uh, how everyone says Tsuka-chan has b - um, buns of steel…”
“That’s true.”
“Well uh, could you check?”
“I told you, it’s true.”
“Hah?! How do you know?!”
Kawai raises an eyebrow pointedly in response.
Tottsu gasps dramatically in comprehension.
IV. The Nighttime Adventure of Tamamori’s Hair
The amount of time Tamamori spends on his hair after a concert is, in EbiKisu’s collective opinion, disproportionate to the amount of people who actually notice him on his way home. Tamamori, however, insists that people stare.
Kawai and Miyata decide to investigate this claim one night, following Tamamori at a discreet distance all the way back to his neighborhood.
The next morning, Tamamori bursts triumphantly in upon ABC-Z, saying “Hora, Kawai-kun, there were two stalker-sans looking at my hair last night!”
When Kawai pretends to not hear him, Tamamori turns to Miyata. “Miyacchi, one of them looked like you!”
V. The Adventure of the Birthing Sea Turtle
Walking into what he thought was an empty practice room, Senga comes upon Kawai and Takizawa-senpai watching a compilation of his own sea turtle impersonations on Shounen Club with slack-jawed concentration. He yelps and rushes over to stand with his arms out in front of the television screen.
“What are you doing?!”
“Oh, Sen-chan!” Takizawa beams a smile at him. “We were watching your sea turtle impersonations!”
“And trying to figure out why the noises you make sound so familiar,” adds Kawai.
“In other words, what kind of kinky pornos you watch!”
Senga can only slink away in utter mortification.
VI. The Case of the Disappearing Evidence
“Ehhhh? Again!?” Kawai looks around the Kis-My-Ft2 dressing room in bewilderment. “What happened to the bag of evidence I left on the table?! Who wiped off the footprint I found on that chair?! And took out the trash?!”
Nikaido looks up from comparing biceps with Senga and snickers at Kawai’s rage. He points to the closet, to which Kawai stomps over.
“Miyata! You were supposed to keep an eye on things!”
“I couldn’t stop him!” wails Miyata.
At that moment, Yokoo walks into the room with a dust rag and vacuum in his hands, and cheerful smile on his face.
VII. A Scandal Behind the Costume Racks
While getting a drink from the vending machine, a cell phone is shoved into Fujigaya’s face with a blurry photo on the screen. “How you do plan to explain this?” demands Kawai.
“Where’d you get that?” Fujigaya asks nervously.
“I have my ways, my friend, I have my ways. What were you doing with Kitayama behind the costume racks, hmmm?”
“You’ve got the wrong person.”
“Ohoho,” chortles Kawai, “Those are definitely your bangs.”
Fujigaya ducks his head, grabs his canned coffee, and rushes back to the Kisumai practice room. But then he turns and smirks. “Maybe, but that’s not Kitayama.”
Ending?
It is by no means unusual to see ABC-Z and Kis-My-Ft2 members coming and going from each others’ dressing rooms; but the day Goseki stomps in with a slouchy, black, felt hat over his eyes and drags Fujigaya away, a few eyebrows are raised in Kisumai. When, a moment later, they hear a door slam and three pairs of feet rushing over to their dressing room, someone is moved to comment.
“Um.” says Senga. “What?”
Hasshi jerks a thumb over his shoulder and explains, “Professor Moriarty and Irene Adler.”
Kitayama nods in perfect understanding and goes promptly back to sleep.