(no subject)
As some of you already know~ there are few people who are better with the ladies than I am. And I've always been pretty damn good at getting the men I want, too. Even the straight ones~ However, as I am taken now, I can no longer use this talent. And I figure it'd be a damn shame to let it go to waste like this. So from now on, I am going to start helping people in need.
Are you desperate? Need to get laid? Maybe just want a date? You've come to the right place~
Some people are already using my services, and I hear they're very~ satisfed. Or they will be.
So to start off, I've decided to help out a few people from my own fandom.
Sanzo might not look too friendly -- and he's not, believe me. But he does have his good sides. He's a monk, which means he's got a pretty high status here in China. He's got a credit card handed to him by the three aspects of Buddha, so he's filthy rich. Doesn't waste money, though, but he's pretty willing to spend it on booze and cigarettes. He's got a gun and a cheating scroll, so you can feel pretty safe. And hell, he's even a virgin.
Sound good~?
He's also got a soft spot for annoying monkeys, but if they bother the fuck outta you like everyone else, it's okay to strangle them. You're doing the world a favour. Luring them away with food works as well. And if you are a monkey, well, this is just your lucky day~
He might not be as hot as me, but he's not too bad~
One requirement, though: you gotta be a seme. This man needs someone who can control him, who's not afraid of getting shot at a few times. And someone patient. He needs a little time to warm up to you~ If you're not scared away by bullets though, his username here is fairyprncsscrwn. Go talk to him~ And yes, he does have a crown.
Moving on...
You're right, Hakkai's a hell of a lot friendlier. In fact, he always smiles. He's damn polite, he keeps things clean, he always knows where your lost shirt is -- actually, he might be a stalker. I've seen him wear my shirts a few times. As long as you remember when trash day is, though, it's worth it. Creepiness aside, he's a fucking amazing roommate.
Tempting so far~?
He's got brains. Loves reading. In fact, it's hard to get him to put a book down no matter how much you nag. Though all he does is glance up and smile at you, so don't worry -- not like he's gonna kill you. He wouldn't do that, even if you poured garbage all over the floor. I've done it, I should know. It was worse.
You gotta be submissive if you wanna be with this guy, though. He's a fucking control freak, and the only guy who could top him is me~
I'd go on, but Hakkai's got too many good sides, so it'd take me all night. I don't even think I could fit it all into one post, so instead, here's another picture. I imagine this guy'll be taken quick, so act fast. Username is haveaneye for when he's around.
Now, if anyone else needs my help, just shout out. No matter how disfigured or hopeless you are, I can get you someone. There's always~ someone desperate enough.
If Sanzo ever gets laid, that should prove my point~
Are you desperate? Need to get laid? Maybe just want a date? You've come to the right place~
Some people are already using my services, and I hear they're very~ satisfed. Or they will be.
So to start off, I've decided to help out a few people from my own fandom.
Sanzo might not look too friendly -- and he's not, believe me. But he does have his good sides. He's a monk, which means he's got a pretty high status here in China. He's got a credit card handed to him by the three aspects of Buddha, so he's filthy rich. Doesn't waste money, though, but he's pretty willing to spend it on booze and cigarettes. He's got a gun and a cheating scroll, so you can feel pretty safe. And hell, he's even a virgin.
Sound good~?
He's also got a soft spot for annoying monkeys, but if they bother the fuck outta you like everyone else, it's okay to strangle them. You're doing the world a favour. Luring them away with food works as well. And if you are a monkey, well, this is just your lucky day~
He might not be as hot as me, but he's not too bad~
One requirement, though: you gotta be a seme. This man needs someone who can control him, who's not afraid of getting shot at a few times. And someone patient. He needs a little time to warm up to you~ If you're not scared away by bullets though, his username here is fairyprncsscrwn. Go talk to him~ And yes, he does have a crown.
Moving on...
You're right, Hakkai's a hell of a lot friendlier. In fact, he always smiles. He's damn polite, he keeps things clean, he always knows where your lost shirt is -- actually, he might be a stalker. I've seen him wear my shirts a few times. As long as you remember when trash day is, though, it's worth it. Creepiness aside, he's a fucking amazing roommate.
Tempting so far~?
He's got brains. Loves reading. In fact, it's hard to get him to put a book down no matter how much you nag. Though all he does is glance up and smile at you, so don't worry -- not like he's gonna kill you. He wouldn't do that, even if you poured garbage all over the floor. I've done it, I should know. It was worse.
You gotta be submissive if you wanna be with this guy, though. He's a fucking control freak, and the only guy who could top him is me~
I'd go on, but Hakkai's got too many good sides, so it'd take me all night. I don't even think I could fit it all into one post, so instead, here's another picture. I imagine this guy'll be taken quick, so act fast. Username is haveaneye for when he's around.
Now, if anyone else needs my help, just shout out. No matter how disfigured or hopeless you are, I can get you someone. There's always~ someone desperate enough.
If Sanzo ever gets laid, that should prove my point~