Oh no!

[onekestrachern]

There has been a terrible accident, and my memory is gone! I have no recollection of who I am. Tell me about myself. What do you know about me? What kind of person am I? What are my likes and dislikes? How did we meet and how long have we known each other? Is there one thing in particular that stands out about me? Tell me who I am

Comments

[stardusted_lady]

You, my dear, are the long-lost princess of Sillynamia. You were stolen as an infant by members of a cult devoted to the One True Chef, having mistaken you for a man being a lemon custard in the autumn. This was particularly strange, since you were kidnapped in the spring. You spent your formative years learning to cook with your toes, as your hands were busy modeling jewelry in a pawn shop.

When you were of age, you went to collect your hands, and arrived just after they were discovered to be the long-lost hands of the long-lost princess. A media event was made of the re-fitting of your hands on your arms, though tragically your hand was swiftly given in marriage to the King Monarch, who died two weeks later.

You are now a gay widow who vacations in the midlands under the assumed identities of various desserts, but never lemon custard. You have three dogs, two cats, and four billion pet iguanas all named Steve.

[onekestrachern]

She fights harder and harder to stifle the giggles as the story progresses, at last collapsing into a fit of laughter until tears run at the corners of her eyes.

[stardusted_lady]

*kneels beside Moonshadow, rubbing her back soothingly* I'm sorry, did I go too far?

[onekestrachern]

"No, no, it was lovely. Oh! If you ever teach the Bards this game, they'll thank you forever! Oh, my!" And she collapses back into giggles.

[darkoctavius]

I'm not entirely sure, but you're worlds-renowned for your impression of a one-man bell choir. *grins and flicks one of the bells, listening to it jingle*

[onekestrachern]

"Oh! Rascal!" She giggles.

[fejijar]

I'll never forget it... The first day I met you...

It was the last day before we all had to be on the ships and across the ocean - the great Heat Haze was devouring our home continent of Kragnaroc, slowy turning it into a giant amusment park. I tried in vain to woo you for the entire journey, but alas, you rebuked my every advance.

The massive prank I planned to play on my rival, the one I was sure would forever grant me your love, backfired, and as the ships sailed onwards, I found myself alone on a small jungle island, only the giant killer ants and mutant strains of food crops to keep me company.

Perhaps it is for the best that you no longer remember me, dear, sweet Clementine... For I am long dead, and your husband and family truly love you, and I am long dead.

[onekestrachern]

"Oh. Well. I hope you were able to find love and happiness among the ants and food crops, before your end."

[fejijar]

I was. Thank you for the thoughts.

[onekestrachern]

"You are always welcome."