Well I broke down drunk and retarded last night to the ex-fiance. I told him I still loved him and that I miss him and I am losing it without him...and the funny thing is is that it was all a lie. I totally lied my face off. I made him just think I still really cared about him when I don't. He moved and ruined anything between us. Yeah I will be ( Read more... )

okay so i tried to have a conversation with a friend of mine, even though i sort of started making it into a debate....about evolution ( Read more... )

15 years ago today my mother (bless her heart) passed away. Funny how my first History assignment is to write my own obituary today, for today, on the day my mother died.

How fitting and depressing, and heart breaking.

Maybe I'll wait until tomorrow...or maybe it's perfect to write a gut-wrenching one for class.

Who knows...

Well I read my last entry and I'm a bit upset I didn't finish it ( Read more... )

so i just spent the last hour scanning through the oldest of old journal entries. i've realized that i have all my past relationships in this journal, except the one. i deleted the entire relationship, from day one to the end and shit, even after ( Read more... )

Well my pell grant went through. I hopefully get it soon ( Read more... )

I believe that my brain has finally conquered my erratic blood flow. It seems that everything inside that wanted to shift and transform into emotional energy is turning into theoretical impossibilities. Marketing my emotional self is now as dead as Billy Mays. Some would say I'm turning into a zombie that craves brains...and they would indeed tell ( Read more... )

so tonight was GREAT! i talked to damien for two and a half hours tonight! i have not spoken to him since 2006 or so....but yeah i have never laughed so much and talked on the phone for that long since high school...hell maybe even this is the first time i've ever talked that long...and sadly, i still have so much more to talk about! aw i miss him ( Read more... )

I'm addicted to 3Oh!3 right now.
yuck!

but i have a ton of energy and am ready to go to the bars tonight and get free drinks for flirting. =]

has handed me a new thinking process. its one of those "do unto yourself" processes. i woke up again. literally woke up again to realize that i don't need anyone and no one needs me. i am just getting myself together and no one is stopping me. i missed being like this. getting a job by the end of the month. getting school things set up by the end ( Read more... )