FML and Also Gam Zu LeTova

[onionsoupmix]

There are three Orthodox schools here. One is far, far, far right of center. The girls get married before high school has ended and the school publishes its own text books so that no one should ever read about divorced parents or boyfriends. That school was out of the question for us.

Then there is the school that is just plain old right of center

Comments

[humascot97]

Is sending the kids to public school and having them taught by a yeshiva/kollel student after school an option, or is the rest of the community going to have a massive freak-out over it?

[onionsoupmix]

massive freak out, also husband will have massive freak out.

[miris_rants]

why are you beating yourself for being concerned about your kids? That shows you're a good mother. I'm sorry but regardless of earthquakes, hunger, and financial crisis - you're still a human being with needs, wants and worries. Your problems are real problems. I always think that this whole "guilt" line of thinking is rather christian in nature - god forbid to enjoy life or to have personal problems or desires. Right away - how dare you to feel this if there's XYZ in the world. Don't let anyone trump your feelings and certainly don't do it to yourself! I'd be pissed if my children weren't getting the right education and would be worried sick.

[oneironstring]

Couldn't agree more.

[ymarkov]

Nu, education is important.

People sometimes don't know what to make of us, too...

[onionsoupmix]

I feel like I should have made myself more of a presence and clarified that my husband and I are our own separate units. And then I feel like a moron for having to explain and justify my hashkafos.

[oneironstring]

Would it be crazy for you to request a private sitting with the head of the school and explain honestly why you want your children in their school? Reassure them that what you are seeking is what you hope they can provide - more tolerance of diversity. Maybe they will step up to the plate. I suspect they are worried that your children may guilt the other children. I don't know if they will meet your honesty with honesty of their own but it's worth a shot.

How very frustrating. I have a feeling we will have the same problems when our boys are older. I hate this.

[hamaskil]

Yep. This is why we chose a public school boruch Hashem. Thanks god no more tuition have to be paid. Down with overpriced xenophobic Jewish day schools.

[sethg_prime]

The school we send our kids to has pluralist Jewish education as one of its core values. But (speaking as a parent who, relative to this school, is on the right-wing fringe) managing pluralism takes a certain amount of commitment, effort, and diplomatic finesse. It’s certainly easier to say “this is our hashkafah and we only want parents who are as committed to teaching the children that hashkafah as we are.” Furthermore, the administration may be concerned that if there is an influx of more-right-wing students, then their parents will start pushing the administration to go rightward on cholov yisrael in the cafeteria, literal teaching of midrash, etc.

FWIW, I did eight months of yeshiva at a pluralist yeshiva whose faculty represent the spectrum of Orthodox hashkafot. I found it a very illuminating experience, but I don’t know what the associated women’s school is like.

[onionsoupmix]

Part of me is wondering what the MO school does when parents are to the left and don't agree with the observances and hashkafos of the MO school. Does the school react the same way as when the threat is from the chareidi side? I am thinking not.

[hamaskil]

Would they accept my kids if I tell them I'll send bosor becholov sandwitches as a snack ? :)

[onionsoupmix]

How does JCDS handle things? What if you came in and said, my kids eat only CY and PY and can you accommodate that?

[vz85]

Boo-hoo, my kids didn't get into the school I wanted.

Not elitist at all. You could just as easily sum up your complaint as "Boo-hoo, my kids aren't getting the education I want for them and that I feel they deserve."

It may be that the MO school is itself elitist and its officials look down their noses at the chareidim who are, on average, quite a bit poorer than the MO community.

[onionsoupmix]

Maybe they are elitist, but that's a luxury I thought they couldn't afford, what with being the smallest school in the frum community. And it's not like we were asking to go for free.

[hamaskil]

They don't want cholov Israel kids I am afraid.

[onionsoupmix]

for the tuition we'd be paying, they could have bought a cholov yisroel cow.