this originally was a comment on marias lj

[onlyaphase]

i read camille's entry too, and i kind of had the same reaction as you. was MY year as progressive as hers? did i do anything to make myself proud of me? because for some reason i can't look back and think "andrea, you made it! you put up with all that shit and look where it's taken you! the future!" i feel like i'm still struggling to not be

Comments

[tulippy]

i worried about papers and tests so i wouldnt have to worry about anything else.

not knowing, not having control, it all scares me to the point where i just want to run away and keep running away. truly, nothing excites me anymore.

i can relate to you so much. thank YOU for writing YOUR entry.