This doesn't normally happen to me!
I have been so insanely stressed out by media coverage of the primaries this year, and this fucking Super Tuesday is raising my stress levels.
Who am I rooting for? What can I say, I have OBAMA FEVER (and I recognize the subtle racial undertones in my new favorite phrase "OBAMA FEVER" but I hope that I can be given a pass because I'm supporting the [half]-black guy).
It isn't necessarily on issues, because every democrat is (understandably) too conservative for my so-left-I'm-pink political beliefs, and he seems to agree with Hill-Dog on almost every issue with only mild quibbles on implementation. I just really want a really inspiring president after a string of profoundly inspiring presidents (and presidents who could have been inspiring had all of the news not been about blow-jobs [although he did teach me about the possibility of putting objects like cigars in a woman's vajay]). I like the fact that when Obama speaks, it feels all tingly, and I like the fact that all of the cool kids want to vote for him, like Scarlett Johannson and Oprah and Stevie Wonder. And I like that students want to vote for him (even though they almost never do, but MAYBE THIS TIME!)
I would really just like a president who might make famous speeches in my lifetime, and I might get to hear famous speeches as they are happening (seriously, his Iowa speech was close, and when has there been a famous speech so far in my lifetime?).
Maybe the possibility for a really fucking good speech is a dumb reason to get so stressed out that you can hardly sleep and have bad dreams about Super Tuesday (I could call in sick to work today on account of my Obama FEVER!). But I like the idea of a candidate that feels like puppy love, even if it doesn't pan out to be the perfect relationship.
Hill-Dog, on the other hand, I would be fine with for president, and I would still vote for her in the general election, but it bothers me that she is one of the most divisive figures in politics today, possibly behind W. Bush D. Cheney, and K. Rove. People really fucking hate Hill-Dog, for mostly not very good reasons, but I just don't want to put our country through more years of extreme hatin' if we can avoid it.
But at the same time, that logic for why I don't fully support Hill-Dog bothers me, because I truly believe that the reason most people are hating on Hillary is because she's a woman, and she has never fulfilled the stereotype of the subservient married woman. Even though they never say it, even though my parents and brother never say it and get angry at me when I tell them that I think that's what's going on, the subtext of every hateful argument screams I HATE HER BECAUSE SHE'S NOT A GOOD WOMAN! And that really pisses me off, and as a feminist, maybe I should get behind her even though she isn't a magical candidate.
Ergo, I am stressed.
In the Republican primary, I get worried because Romney looks like a fucking pedophile and creeps me out, Huckabee wants to change the dead old constitution to reflect God's living word (creepy!), and McCain strikes me as an extremely angry individual. And it's always been fun when McCain uses his anger on other Republicans, because Republicans annoy me, and I like hearing about them getting yelled at on the senate floor by this angry old man. But if he's THIS difficult to work with with members of his own country and party, then what the hell would this angry fuck do in negotiations with China? That keeps me up at night too. Plus, he's getting really old, and I learned from my grandparents that old age has a way of taking you to the extreme of your personality. Bubbly old people tend to become extremely bubbly, and mean old people become extremely mean.
Stephen King wrote an article in Entertainment Weekly that basically said that he thought that the primaries have been really DRAMATIC because there's no new television with the writer's strike, and we've turned this into our new weekly dramedy. I can't entirely say that he's wrong in my case, but I'm itching to find out what happens after the cliffhanger.