I was actually a week or two older than seventeen when it happened. I had been dating this guy for about a month and ahalf and I though I was ready, and I believed he loved me.
Then he found god, told me I was a sin, and got back together with his exboyfriend. :)
The two boys at school were numbers 4 and 5, respectively.
psh. don't be jealous. that was boy number 1. boy number 2 i found in bed with my roommate the next night. boy number 3 thanked me afterwards because he really didn't want to go to college a virgin. boy number 4 is now holding hands with a virgin with no chin, and boy number 5 is responsible for last night.
1. I think I really only truly realized it last semester. I mean, for as long as I can remember, the only time I've ever felt like I was doing anything with meaning, or worth my time, or that I was good at, it's been theatre. It's been being on stage. It's been that rush when the lights go up, and that bittersweet kick in the teeth when the lights go down. What else was I gonna do when I went to college? All I wanna do is be that girl in the movies. A little farfetched, I know, but it's what I thought I wanted. And then last semester, I'm here, and everyone's good, kind of. And then the kicker comes. They all think I'm better. I'm better than them. I know that's egomanical, but I believe in what I'm doing now. I believe that I'm good. I believe that I'm better than most, and that I belong here. I'm an actress. It's all I can do. It's all I'll ever do
( ... )
Do you ever wish you could be someone completely different for a day, just to see if life sucked for them just as much as it (sometimes) sucks for you?
All the time. Not only do I have ego issues, as mentioned above. I have the WORST jealousy issues of anyone of my friends. I can't stand losing, and I always want to win. And when someone else wins, I want to be them, to see if it is better, or if I'm getting something out of this completely messy thing called life that God gave me. That maybe it's not worth it being me, and maybe the fact that I'm not a good person makes it more desirable to be someone else. I wonder that all the time. It scares me sometimes, Claire.
You said ANYTHING, and so I troll your personal journal in flagrant violation of all rules of etiquette to ask what's up with broadwaysecrets this week? why hasn't it updated?
'Cause the thing is I get that everyone's life gets way busy, and I'm not like pissy about it or anything (nor am I under any illusion that you and not reflections typically makes the updates there, but, y'know, her journal is flocked and you said to ask you anything!) I'm just curious, 'cause I submitted a secret for the first time ever and I was all curious to see what people would say and then there was never an entry! woe!
You seem like a very nice person though, and things. So I don't mean to harass.
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(i adore you.)
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I've been curious since you mentioned you slept with that one boy who's name I can't remember. :/
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Then he found god, told me I was a sin, and got back together with his exboyfriend. :)
The two boys at school were numbers 4 and 5, respectively.
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you sleep with some pretty hot men. i'm jealous! :D
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that was boy number 1. boy number 2 i found in bed with my roommate the next night. boy number 3 thanked me afterwards because he really didn't want to go to college a virgin. boy number 4 is now holding hands with a virgin with no chin, and boy number 5 is responsible for last night.
don't be jealous. lol
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Why/When?
Why the Hilary Clinton hatred?
Do you have any skeletons in yo' closet that you feel comfy sharing?
I'm tempted to do this.
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'Cause the thing is I get that everyone's life gets way busy, and I'm not like pissy about it or anything (nor am I under any illusion that you and not reflections typically makes the updates there, but, y'know, her journal is flocked and you said to ask you anything!) I'm just curious, 'cause I submitted a secret for the first time ever and I was all curious to see what people would say and then there was never an entry! woe!
You seem like a very nice person though, and things. So I don't mean to harass.
::toddles off::
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