today i went to borders and got a book (hot water music by Charles Bukowski). and Joy Divisions Greatest Hits in compact disk form.

i guess im officialy single now.

i think my biggest pet peave is people asking me why i have such low self esteam. i think its times like these that makes it obvious.

since the rise and fall of tribute night,i have posponed all musical ventures, untill i get a new bass.

_+ today is the last day of being grounded (what the fuck im 17?)

_-i was suposed to go to gilman last night with brian (or) hang out with alexa. but i couldn't.

_so i went to a barbeque. and two out of the three most beauitful blonde girls i know fell asleep in my arms. (they are 5 and 10, hardly getting some action)

new layout:onsunday
(thanks drea)

why does this night seem to keep draging onnnnnnnn?

happy birthday alexa newman!!!

_edit {insert funny quote by alexa here}

R.I.P.

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hi, i'm derek, im a manipulative ass hole. girls shouldn't like me, or get involved with me. i'll only hurt you. i've hurt anyone that i have become emotionaly atatched to.

please no one like me.

i dont deserve it.
trust me.

_1:everytime I see andrea in the hall, and our eyes don't meet (which nowadays they never do) I sharp pain gets me inside. I know this was over a year ago, but it kills me to know that I could ever make a person feel as much so as I did her. She was crazy about me and I really was crazy about her, eventhough diffrent things at the time blinded me ( Read more... )

this weekend conconsisted of a play(onceuponanisland). not a fasion show =/ (sorry marley) being drunk. a show in oakland (xbxrx/coachwhips). a hip party in san francisco. lots of good company a car acident and so many other things.

i realy enjoy the veiw from chris's roof.

i have such a headace i think ill go o.d. on tylenol now.

new s/n: ohh fag core

10.13.03 11:04
(my live journal time is catching up with real time.)

xmodelcorex:

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