exo: the perfect words never crossed my mind
The perfect words never crossed my mind
- Kris/Suho. PG-13. 5743 words.
- After finishing his porn trilogy, Kris decides to try out a different genre. Joonmyun has very little faith in him.
- To the enablers, my babies, thank you for the hand-holding and for generally supplying me with ideas. To the mastermind, YOU. ARE. EVIL. ♥
Kris started writing when he was thirteen. It was an essay for a writing competition. He wrote about his love for tennis and the perils of training at such a young age. He won a silver medal for it, and he vaguely remembered looking forlornly at the winner of the gold medal, a kid a year younger than him who wrote about the wisteria tree outside their school, and a girl who often waited under it for the man of his dreams.
That was what everyone knew, but Kris knew very well that he started writing when he was eleven.
It was a fan fiction about Yuusuke and Kurama, how Kurama sought comfort from Yuusuke after being indiscreetly rejected by Hiei. It ended with awfully-written porn, or at least that was what Kris called handjobs at that time. It was a turning point of his life, because it was the first time he felt so accomplished, and that Yuusuke-Kurama fan fiction was his first published work, ever.
That was a secret he would never let anyone know.
Except he bumped into said gold medalist one day, in a coffee shop, while he was on his way to the office to meet his editor. "Oh, hey! Kris, right?" the gold medalist said, bright-eyed and too upbeat for 6 a.m. coffee. "I was in the school paper with you back in primary school. You were the literary editor and-"
Kris took a deep breath. "And you were my associate director. Zhang Yixing. Yeah."
Yixing smiled, satisfied.
Kris had two options - he could wipe that silly grin off Yixing's face by brushing him off and running as fast as he could to the office, or he could indulge Yixing a little by engaging in a quick chat. Yixing might actually be a good addition to his roster of connections, after all, and it's not as if he saw old acquaintances - writing nemeses - everyday. But there was also the danger of running late and being scolded by his editor, and the last thing he'd want on a Monday morning is to get scolded by Joonmyun.
"I haven't seen you since graduation," Kris began. "How've you been?"
"Good. Pretty great, actually." Yixing scrunched his nose. "Very busy, but I'm pretty happy where I am right now." Yixing paused for a while, then grinned. "You? Still writing gay porn?"
Kris blinked twice. "Yeah, earning a living from it," he replied, and bit the inside of his cheek lightly in an attempt to not strangle Yixing. Yixing just laughed, though, so Kris took it as a sign to leave. But Yixing caught on and kept talking, even when Kris started walking to the direction of his office.
And that was how Kris found out that he and Yixing shared the same publisher, and that Yixing was that Z. Lay who had been topping charts for the past few months.
---
"God, Kris, if this is another Fifty Shades spin-off then I am terminating my contract with you. As in right now."
"Wait, let me explain! Look-" Kris flips through the pages of his draft and highlights a line as he scores a finger across it. "This twist right here is totally different from Fifty Shades and not all Christians and Anastasias are born to be in the Fifty Shades world."
Joonmyun massages his temples. "I don't need to read all 300 pages of your draft to know that you probably wrote another spin-off. And no, you are not writing a sequel to Nothingness. Kris, how many times are we going to argue about this?"
Kris sinks in his seat. He hasn't released a book since ending his Forty-seven Shades series ‐ of Light, of Darkness, of Nothingness. The series ends in a tragedy where Christian, the lead male, severs ties with Anastasia, the lead female, following a tragic mishap at work. "Let's just keep things professional," Christian tells Anastasia, and Christian files for a transfer to a different department. There is no closure, no definite ending, but Kris hints at a final sequel to Forty-seven Shades of Nothingness, and fans have so lovingly decided to call it Forty-seven Shades of Completion.
Kris takes a deep breath. He can file for a transfer ala Christian, but everyone knows that his niche is erotica fiction; non-erotica simply isn't his style.
"I'm stuck," he confesses. "I've been stuck for the past few months, for the past year, and I want to deviate from my usual genre but nothing's coming out."
Joonmyun coughs. "I see what you did there." He then adjusts his glasses. "And I appreciate that you're trying to "explore" and all, but maybe this isn't the time for that. You're weeks behind your deadline for the plot. You've never missed a deadline, ever."
"I don't want to be grouped with the rest of the erotica writers. I want to be seen as someone who can write porn with substance."
There is silence for a while. A small smile tugs at the corner of Joonmyun's lips and Kris shivers a little. It's the same smile that makes him feel like a kid clamoring for Joonmyun's attention and affection, the same smile that makes him throw bad ideas into the trashcan and write an entirely new (and better) plot that Joonmyun can be proud of. "I think you just need a break," Joonmyun says, finally breaking the silence, and Kris just nods.
"But you'll have to start writing after this."
"Then you'll have to buy me good food. And we'll have to eat cheesecake for dessert."
Joonmyun laughs. Kris can feel a plot brewing at the back of his mind.
"Your wish is my command."
Their partnership began when Kris was twenty four. Joonmyun was fresh off of college and Kris was naive and wrote what Chanyeol usually called "tasteless porn". Kris was working on the first book in the Forty-seven Shades series back then, and by that time everybody had already forgotten about Christian Grey. Only a year after did Joonmyun remember who Christian Grey was, and berate Kris for writing a plot similar to that of Fifty Shades'.
Joonmyun has been his editor ever since.
Kris has released a total of five books - three from his Forty-seven Shades series, a pocketbook tackling highschool romance and the many places you can make out in, and a novel about office romance and work tension resulting in the best table sex ever.
"So, what's stopping you from writing outside of the erotica realm?"
Kris scrunches his nose. "I have no idea, to be completely honest. I guess I'm just tired of writing about sex day and night."
At the back of his head, Kris processes the next set of questions from Joonmyun.
He actually has a very good idea of why he wants to deviate from his usual genre - he has run out of sex plots to talk about. After researching for days on end and seeking information from his friends, he's gotten boring answers and nothing that can be used for a literary material, much more a raunchy novel. Finally, at the very bottom of his "why I should try writing something else" list - Joonmyun rarely ever gets a boner while reading his writing anymore. It's not a good sign.
"I was going to suggest romance, but you know nothing about romance."
Kris rests the fork on the small plate and frowns a little. "So are you implying that I'm well-versed in porn?"
Joonmyun laughs. "I don't know, I don't think I want to know, and I'm glad I don't."
I know a lot about romance, Kris wants to argue. Unrequited feelings, to be exact, he appends, and studies Joonmyun's features - the crinkle of his eyes, the faint lines on his forehead from all those nights of editing and drawing sad faces on Kris' drafts with a red pen, the playful smile on his lips. He takes a deep breath. Four years isn't a lot of time, but when you spend nearly every single day with the same person the whole time, it feels like a decade, maybe even more. He wakes up to Joonmyun's calls about work and manuscripts and good coffee everyday. He goes to bed thinking about his next book and the disappointed look on Joonmyun's features every night. In the four years that they have known each other, Joonmyun has carved a niche in his life and has squeezed himself in it. Now, Kris isn't just Kris - he's part Kris and part Joonmyun.
"I can try romance," Kris says with finality. "I like challenges."
Joonmyun laughs again and takes a piece of his cheesecake. Some crumbs stick to the corner of his lips.
Kris plots out the story in his head. A girl sets off in a quest to be the best manhwa artist ever, and scores a deal with one of the biggest publishing houses in the country. She gets assigned to a strict editor. After spending enough time with her editor, she finds out that he's not entirely strict and the worst person to ever surface Earth. She gets sick after meeting a tight deadline, and her editor takes care of her. The inevitable happens - she finds herself developing feelings for her editor, so she portrays him as a villain in her next manhwa, except the lead female falls in love with him.
It's terribly cliche and trite, but that's how romance novels usually are.
"I'll send you a summary tonight," Kris says. "Prepare to be blown away."
Kris sees Yixing again the same week, emerging from one of the conference rooms. "Story pitch," Yixing says, mumbling, and Kris just nods, unwilling to engage in a conversation.
"Readers are asking for a sequel to Lonely Nights in Changsha so I proposed a plot to the board and they shot it down." Yixing exhales, eyes falling downcast on the floor.
"Why don't you just write about wisteria and a girl waiting for the man of his destiny," Kris replies flatly.
Yixing laughs a little. "Funny. But that can actually work."
And it does, Kris learns when he bumps into Yixing the Monday of the following week. "Thanks for the suggestion," Yixing says, then dashes off with his editor who's donning the brightest blond hair. "I'll make sure to thank you in the book!"
I'd rather you don't, Kris wants to say, but he gives Yixing a small smile and waves at him, anyway. His phone sounds off not too long after - it's a message from Joonmyun, written in all caps. "COME TO MY OFFICE NOW"
"I know you have issues with your phone, but can you not yell at me through text?" he says once he reaches Joonmyun's office. Joonmyun peers from his laptop's screen and pushes his glasses up. Kris furrows his eyebrows. This is Joonmyun's way of telling him that there's something wrong that should be fixed right away. The last time it happened was when Kris overlooked some pronouns that made the lead female undergo a sex change; it was disconcerting. Kris moves closer and clasps his hands together.
"I just finished reading that five-page summary of yours," Joonmyun begins. Kris holds his breath as Joonmyun's lips stay parted. "And I liked it. Chanyeol was raving about it through text, so yes - it's good. You should start writing it soon."
Light breaks across Kris' features and he feels his lips being tugged at the corners, forming a grin too big and weird for his facial structure that a look of worry surfaces on Joonmyun's face. "I won't let you down," he says, determined, and Joonmyun gives him that smile again.
"You never did."
"So on a scale of 1-10, how cheesy is this story and how much does it resemble your love life?"
Kris shoots Chanyeol a stern look and places their drinks on the table - tall, non-fat Cappuccino for him, and something overly customized and too sweet for Chanyeol. "On a scale of 1-10, how amazing would it be if I poured your coffee all over your face?" he retorts, and Chanyeol just scoffs.
"Good, as long as you lay off my hair. Double caramel pump?
"Yes."
"Awesome. I'll give your story a 5, then."
Kris leans back into the seat and watches as Chanyeol goes back to reading his manuscript. Back when he was just starting out, Joonmyun took offense in Kris making someone else other than his editor read his drafts. "It's rude. It's like you don't want me in your life," he remembers Joonmyun telling him. He also remembers scoffing and shoving his draft in Joonmyun's chest. These days, Joonmyun already assumes Chanyeol has gone through his draft and is usually surprised when Chanyeol hasn't.
"Honestly, though, this is good. Better than your porn series."
"It's a trilogy."
"Porn trilogy, then."
Chanyeol is a movie director. He's all extremes - he's extremely nice to talents, yet extremely strict and hard on his team. "Good cop, bad cop. It gets movies done. It gets me awards. Haters can die of sugar deprivation," Chanyeol would say whenever he's asked about the way he works. Half the time, Kris is grateful for Chanyeol's honesty; other times, he doesn't bother figuring out if it sits well with him.
"Why did you say it's better than the trilogy, though?"
"Well." Chanyeol puts the draft down and takes a sip of his coffee. "First off, it's not tasteless porn. You've actually created new characters, and they actually have personalities, and your story finally has substantial plot. I'm pretty proud of you, not even gonna lie.
"And I like the build up to the girl getting sick. It sounds a lot like November 2015."
Kris smiles a little. He appreciates the fact that Chanyeol can remember moments in his life like scenes in a film. "And February 2016," he adds, and Chanyeol nods, laughing a little.
"D'you think he'll notice?"
Kris shrugs. "Doubt it. He's dense."
Dense is a word he has reserved for Joonmyun and Joonmyun alone. Not that he's been overt with his display of affection, but he's obvious enough that even Joonmyun's associate editor - Zitao - can tell that he's a bit too attached to Joonmyun. And attracted. He's spearheaded every birthday celebration Joonmyun has had since 2013, has accompanied Joonmyun to every family reunion that Joonmyun would rather not attend, has spent the past three Christmases and New Year's Eves with Joonmyun, serving him too much wine and rubbing circles on Joonmyun's back while Joonmyun throws up in the sink. "And you don't look like that kind of guy," Zitao even comments within Joonmyun's earshot, but Joonmyun's too busy blowing candles and talking to guests and mouthing to Kris, GET ME OUT OF HERE.
"Yeah. He's dense. You can probably give him flowers and chocolates and he won't even realize that you're trying to woo him."
As expected, Chanyeol is right.
He arrives at Joonmyun's office the following day with a bouquet of flowers in one hand and a box of chocolates in the other. "For encouraging me to try something different," Kris says, and Joonmyun takes both presents with a soft smile and a question at the curl of his lips.
"Have you been reading too much manhwa? You've probably been reading too much manhwa."
"I have to," Kris says, choking a little. Dense and in-denial do not go well together. "I mean, I'm writing about a manhwa artist and-"
Joonmyun laughs. Joonmyun laughs loud and he cackles and he's gasping for breath at the end of it all. "You're funny," he tells Kris once he catches his breath, and Kris just shakes his head and texts Chanyeol, Theory proven. He is dense.
take him out after submitting the final manuscript and propose to him there hahaha
Hell, no. Or I can try that just for kicks.
Yeah, I will.
Park Chanyeol, I will kill you if something bad happens.
your fault not mine. i didn't do anything to make you fall in love with the densest man in the world HAHAHAHAHA :p
There's still a full week before the deadline when Kris finishes the whole story. Chanyeol has finally given him a go signal to present it to Joonmyun, and Kris has finally been able to keep his hands away from the keyboard long enough to change some scenes and make some minor fixes. He appears on Joonmyun's office's doorstep unannounced, his draft in one hand and a box of donuts in the other.
"Are you bribing me?"
Kris laughs a little, then looks for a place where he can place the box. Joonmyun's desk is a mess - there are piles of manuscript's left and right, and his coffee mug looks as if it hasn't been washed for three days. There are numerous cups of coffee and some boxes of take-out food in the trashcan.
"No. I'm feeding you. Have you been working overtime again?"
Joonmyun smiles weakly. Kris just shakes his head and makes space for the box to Joonmyun's right, then hands Joonmyun his manuscript.
"Wow. You're way ahead of schedule. Is something wrong? Are you dying?"
Possibly. Three days before finally finishing the story, he hit the worst writer's block and subsequently felt the strangest urge to just walk up to Joonmyun and just tell him how he felt, face-to-face instead of through the story. He locked himself up in his house, took no calls, and had food delivered for the next three days. He was able to finish the story two days after, and only then did he unlock his doors and boot up his phone and send a text to Chanyeol, saying, "Read my draft. Bring some food. I'm starving."
Of course, he didn't tell Joonmyun about this. Joonmyun is a worrywart - it's enough that he's already worrying about deadlines and keeping Zitao from strangling the incompetent writers on board.
"I was inspired. Now go, eat and read the story. And please refrain from the facial expressions."
Joonmyun laughs a little and smiles upon seeing the donuts. "Aww, hangul donuts! What are these English letters- IQU?"
Kris just shakes his head, and the smile on Joonmyun's lips and his eyes soften. Facial expression #1.
Joonmyun goes through the manuscript without looking up at Kris, only tearing his gaze from the material to check which part of his name he's eating.
Kris fishes for his notebook from his bag and starts writing keywords, phrases, then, eventually, paragraphs. It's a side-story to the story he has just written. It's about Joanne's new manhwa getting sold out the week it is released, and Kevin taking her out to celebrate the success of her new manhwa. They have too much soju and too little samgyupsal, and Joanne has the worst alcohol tolerance and ends up getting too drunk, sputtering a clumsy confession and promptly passing out of Kevin's lap after that.
Kevin takes her to his house and watches her sleep. When Joanne wakes up, Kevin has already gone to work, but has left her a note - Good job. Meet me for lunch. Celebration Part 2! - and some breakfast.
Joanne sinks in her seat and buries her face in her hands. Kevin should stop being so nice, she thinks. Kevin should also stop being so darn attractive.
"A happy ending," Joonmyun suddenly says, eyes wide and a smile on his lips. "Seriously. You wrote something that ends happily."
"Am I not allowed to try something different?"
"Yeah, but-" Joonmyun's smile widens and he exhales loudly. "Wow. That was something different. It felt raw. Real. And I loved that you included dates and all those little moments, like Kevin taking care of Joanne when she got sick after meeting the deadline and all."
Kris coughs a bit. "That part was my favorite." He tucks the pen in his notebook and lays it aside, then reaches for a donut. "So, do I need to fix anything?"
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but no. This is perfect! Are you free tomorrow? We can meet with the cover artist so we can get things moving."
Kris furrows his eyebrows and stares and inches closer. "You mean the first draft is already good?"
Joonmyun nods, then gives him two thumbs up. His fingers are tiny and a bit stubby. "You'll have to thank the donuts for this."
Kris nods and laughs a little. "Yeah. I guess I have to. So, dinner? My treat."
Then the scene he's just written earlier plays in his mind, in images so crisp and clear that they look too realistic for daydreaming. But Joonmyun is frowning and shaking his head and saying, "Ah, sorry, not today. Pretty swamped with work. Zitao's been sick the whole week so I'm covering for him."
Kris swallows the rest of the donut down his throat and gives Joonmyun a small smile. "It's okay. Lunch, then. Tomorrow, after the meeting."
He leaves not too long after, hands now empty, and he keeps repeating the image of Joonmyun's smile in his head, that satisfied look in Joonmyun's features, This is perfect! spilling from Joonmyun's lips. It's enough a reward for all his hard work, so he relishes the thought, too much, in fact, that he fails to hear Joonmyun calling his name behind him.
Hello! I can't come to the phone right now, so please leave a message after the beep and I'll get back to you the soonest I can. Thanks!
"Hey Joonmyun, I left a notebook in your office this afternoon when I submitted my draft. It's a green notebook and there's a pen inside it. I'll get it from you tomorrow, before the meeting?"
Hello! I can't come-
"And oh, don't open it. Don't even think of doing anything to it. Thanks. Bye."
Kris comes down with the worst cold when he wakes up in the morning. He checks his calendar - two weeks too early to get sick - and buries his face in his pillows. He dozes off again, and only wakes up an hour after, to the sound of his phone buzzing and at the sight of Chanyeol's picture flashing on his phone's screen.
"Hey. What's up?"
"Kris?" The line chops up a little Chanyeol sounds three octaves too high. "I've been calling you for an hour already but you weren't picking up so I called Chanyeol."
Ah. Joonmyun. "Oh, shit. Sorry." He sits up, then sniffles. "I'm down with a cold. Can you buy time while I get dressed? I'll be there in… thirty minutes. Or you can have the artist go through the manuscript so she can start visualizing-"
"There won't be a meeting, and you're not going here. Stay in bed, Kris. I'm coming over."
In the background, Kris can hear Chanyeol saying, Oooh. Whipped. He exhales loudly and just mumbles an okay in response, then unlocks his front door. He puts his phone as far away from him as possible and promptly collapses on his couch, in pajamas too small for him, Joonmyun's first present on his first year in SM Publications.
The next time Kris wakes up is at noon, just in time for lunch. "Here, I made some soup," Joonmyun tells him ,and he slowly sits up, limbs still sore.
"You should stop taking care of me when I'm sick. You have the immune system of baby panda."
"Says the one who has a scheduled colds season every year." Joonmyun chuckles a bit, then gestures for Kris to take another sip of the soup. "Finish that, then drink this tablet. I'll just grab some coffee."
His mind goes back to November 2015, the day he realized that he fancied Joonmyun's face too much and that, maybe, he was attracted to Joonmyun. Joonmyun's face was too close and Joonmyun was replacing the cold towel on his forehead and going on about taking a long rest because he deserved it, and that they maybe they should go out of town to celebrate Kris finally completing the trilogy. Then, he remembers February 2016 and all other moments pertinent to it - having to take care of Joonmyun after Joonmyun took care of him, meeting Joonmyun's grandparents and, subsequently, taking them out to dinner, being thanked by Joonmyun's grandparents because, "You know him. He pushes himself too hard. He's a workaholic. It's a good thing you're there to take care of him."
Kris remembers nodding a bit too enthusiastically. "He's also too nice and too good at what he does. It's a sin."
"Have you taken your medicine?" Joonmyun asks when he gets back, looking considerable more refreshed than he was minutes ago. The first sip of coffee always does wonders. Kris nods and offers a smile. "Good. Now, close your eyes and get some rest. I'll just be here."
"But I've just eaten."
"You know what I mean."
Kris laughs a little. "Thanks," he replies, mumbling, then does as he is told because it doesn't hurt to let Joonmyun have his way from time to time just so Kris can have his way. He closes his eyes, and scenes from a movie start playing in his eyes and he just watches until he drifts off.
In a week, Kris' recovers from his fever but not from his colds. He meets up with the cover artist without Joonmyun's knowledge and gives specific instructions as to the appearance of the characters and, when he goes to Joonmyun's office, Joonmyun is nowhere to be found. Kris' green notebook is at the center of Joonmyun's desk, though, and the pen is on top of it. There's also a sticky note tacked to it, saying, "Going to Malaysia to look for a cheaper paper supplier." Then, in small letters, "Drink your vitamins." When Kris opens his notebook, he sees notes in red ink, copywriting marks, and a some characters scribbled on the last page of the story.
Kris.
Let's talk.
---
He receives a text message from Joonmyun when Joonmyun gets back. "Breakfast tomorrow, 7 a.m.. Don't be too early," it says, and Kris' initial reaction is to exit Joonmyun's message as quickly as possible and call Chanyeol.
Sorry, can't come to the phone right now. I'm in the middle of doing something. Obviously. And oh, if you're Kris, whatever it is you're going to ask, it's a yes. Chanyeol, out!
"Wow. What a friend," Kris mumbles. He then decides to boot up his computer and go through his story again, to see if the scenes he has written are too realistic or too similar to his experiences. If Chanyeol's memory is good, Joonmyun's is even better; Joonmyun can narrate a chunk of Kris' life since scoring a deal with the company and not miss a detail.
He's sure he's made parallelisms vague enough so that his story will be more easy to relate to, but he might have overlooked something. He ends up falling asleep on his keyboard, though, and, when he wakes up, A, S, D, and F have already left a good impression on his skin.
"I don't know what you've been up to, but I hope that thing isn't permanent," Joonmyun says when Kris arrives, eyes still puffy.
"Thanks, but I think it's rather cool. Fashionable, even." He coughs a bit as he settles on the seat opposite Joonmyun. Two weeks of no contact whatsoever, two weeks of not seeing Joonmyun and being left with a note like that, has done all sorts of things to his mind. The worst that has happened is him continuing the side story. The best is scrapping the whole continuation and resolving to himself to not write a sequel.
"So, how was your trip?"
Joonmyun smiles, then takes a deep breath.
The succeeding minutes are of Joonmyun narrating his exciting exploits in Malaysia, meeting suppliers left and right, and somehow ending up on a book hunt. Kris understands Joonmyun's excitement over books, but he will never be able to understand Joonmyun's enthusiasm for meeting all sorts of people.
"Oh, the pancakes are for him," Joonmyun tells the waiter when the food arrives, and the waiter serves him a huge pancake. It's a bit burnt around the edges, and is decorated with whipped cream smiley and strawberry syrup. "Go on, eat. Don't worry about me."
Joonmyun's beef and kimchi salad arrives not too long after, and Joonmyun reveals that he actually made a quick trip to Hongkong to visit a friend and ended up buying more books and scarves than intended. He takes out a package from his bag and reaches for Kris' hand, then places the present on it. "Just a little something for beating the crap out of that deadline."
"Pancakes, sir?"
Kris looks up, a bit distraught, but smiles just the same. "No, I'm good."
"Yes, he'll take it."
Joonmyun's smiling brighter than the usual. Kris doesn't have a problem with it - of course, he doesn't - but there's something terribly off-putting about it, like the sides of Joonmyun's lips are being pulled apart and that the smile is going to rip through his face any moment. He starts to eat the new giant pancake, anyway, to keep the smile on Joonmyun's lips, and notes that the design is now a winking smiley.
"They have pretty interesting stuff here," Kris comments.
Joonmyun chokes on an slice of beef. "Yeah. Very interesting." Joonmyun clears his throat, then rushes, "So, Tsim Sha Tsui! You know Kowloon Park? Nothing has ever made me feel so small!"
The narration is nearing Joonmyun's return to Korea when the third plate of pancake arrives. "Joonmyun, are you trying to make me hate pancakes?" Kris asks even before taking a glance at the pancake the waiter has just laid on his side of the table. "I mean, I know they're my favorite and I know you know that but-"
Joonmyun just laughs and points at the pancake, then bites his lower lip.
There are letters written on the pancake, and Kris has to lean back a bit to get a better view of the whole thing. He furrows his eyebrows for a while until the realization hits him.
"IQ- Oh."
Kris wants to laugh. He wants to make fun of the whole situation and of Joonmyun, of the pancake decorated with the letters "IQU" and a small "2" beside it, of himself. He takes another look at the pancake just to make sure that he's not missing a detail, then looks at Joonmyun again.
"My hangul donuts were better."
Joonmyun chuckles. "Shut up. This was the best I could think of."
There's a good full minute of silence as Kris slices the pancake with utmost care. He cuts out the "2" for Joonmyun and puts it on Joonmyun's plate, saying, "You have to share my pain," and Joonmyun slaps him lightly on the arm.
"Oh, by the way," Joonmyun says after a while. "I read the side story."
Kris lays his utensils flat on the plate and looks at Joonmyun in the eye. It's a breach of trust, what Joonmyun has just done, but he can't seem to find it in his heart to get mad, much less be disappointed. He studies the way Joonmyun's lips press together tightly, the smile that was once there disappearing as Joonmyun says, "It's horrible. Don't even think about expanding it."
Kris doesn't bother to hold back the laughter threatening to fall from his lips, just lets himself laugh out loud and breathe and shake his head, then shoots something akin to a hurt look at Joonmyun. Joonmyun sticks his tongue out. Kris almost knocks his coffee over, and they laugh all the more. There's a wisteria tree in the distance and Kris can see the petals being carried by the wind, and he laughs all the more. They look silly and stupid but they haven't talked for two weeks, and this love story is four years in the making, and Kris hardly knows anything about romance - requited love, that is.
He won't mind learning now, though.
Despite Joonmyun's dislike for the side story, Kris' new book finally gets the top spot the same way that Joanne's new manhwa does, and Z. Lay's new book sits comfortably on the second. Initial stocks are sold out within a week, and Chanyeol attributes this mostly to Kris' new photo in the "About the Author" panel, and that nice, handwritten signature that adds a personal touch to it. Of course, they celebrate, but Kris doesn't get drunk, and neither does Joonmyun, but they make sure that Chanyeol drinks more than enough alcohol to actually get him to talk to his new director of photography, Baekhyun.
Chanyeol wakes up the following day with the worst hangover and with a message from Baekhyun, saying, "That was a great night ;)"
Kris wakes up to a call from Chanyeol that same morning, and to the scent of the coffee Joonmyun is brewing in the kitchen.
He won't have it any other way.
Captain Obvious, Captain Oblivious
Thanks to:
Wink, for always believing in me and for the pancakes.
My crazy best friend, for being crazy.
SM Publications, for giving me the opportunity to share this book with people all over the world.
And to Z, my good friend, wisteria moments are real.
---
a/n:
1. "IQU" is a tragic misspelling of "IOU" or "I♥U".
2. The director of photography is also called a cinematographer.
3. Yixing's new book that got the #2 spot is, yes, the one about the wisteria tree and the girl waiting for the man of his dreams. LOL.
4. Kris wrote the two other books (the ones that don't belong to the trilogy) after writing the trilogy.
5. Lu Han is Yixing's editor. Yup, the guy with the bright blond hair.
6. The title was taken from Snow Patrol's Signal Fire.
7. PLEASE DIRECT ALL COMPLAINTS AND FEELS TO JQ madelyn93 AND JO halcyondusk. TYSM.
- Kris/Suho. PG-13. 5743 words.
- After finishing his porn trilogy, Kris decides to try out a different genre. Joonmyun has very little faith in him.
- To the enablers, my babies, thank you for the hand-holding and for generally supplying me with ideas. To the mastermind, YOU. ARE. EVIL. ♥
Kris started writing when he was thirteen. It was an essay for a writing competition. He wrote about his love for tennis and the perils of training at such a young age. He won a silver medal for it, and he vaguely remembered looking forlornly at the winner of the gold medal, a kid a year younger than him who wrote about the wisteria tree outside their school, and a girl who often waited under it for the man of his dreams.
That was what everyone knew, but Kris knew very well that he started writing when he was eleven.
It was a fan fiction about Yuusuke and Kurama, how Kurama sought comfort from Yuusuke after being indiscreetly rejected by Hiei. It ended with awfully-written porn, or at least that was what Kris called handjobs at that time. It was a turning point of his life, because it was the first time he felt so accomplished, and that Yuusuke-Kurama fan fiction was his first published work, ever.
That was a secret he would never let anyone know.
Except he bumped into said gold medalist one day, in a coffee shop, while he was on his way to the office to meet his editor. "Oh, hey! Kris, right?" the gold medalist said, bright-eyed and too upbeat for 6 a.m. coffee. "I was in the school paper with you back in primary school. You were the literary editor and-"
Kris took a deep breath. "And you were my associate director. Zhang Yixing. Yeah."
Yixing smiled, satisfied.
Kris had two options - he could wipe that silly grin off Yixing's face by brushing him off and running as fast as he could to the office, or he could indulge Yixing a little by engaging in a quick chat. Yixing might actually be a good addition to his roster of connections, after all, and it's not as if he saw old acquaintances - writing nemeses - everyday. But there was also the danger of running late and being scolded by his editor, and the last thing he'd want on a Monday morning is to get scolded by Joonmyun.
"I haven't seen you since graduation," Kris began. "How've you been?"
"Good. Pretty great, actually." Yixing scrunched his nose. "Very busy, but I'm pretty happy where I am right now." Yixing paused for a while, then grinned. "You? Still writing gay porn?"
Kris blinked twice. "Yeah, earning a living from it," he replied, and bit the inside of his cheek lightly in an attempt to not strangle Yixing. Yixing just laughed, though, so Kris took it as a sign to leave. But Yixing caught on and kept talking, even when Kris started walking to the direction of his office.
And that was how Kris found out that he and Yixing shared the same publisher, and that Yixing was that Z. Lay who had been topping charts for the past few months.
---
"God, Kris, if this is another Fifty Shades spin-off then I am terminating my contract with you. As in right now."
"Wait, let me explain! Look-" Kris flips through the pages of his draft and highlights a line as he scores a finger across it. "This twist right here is totally different from Fifty Shades and not all Christians and Anastasias are born to be in the Fifty Shades world."
Joonmyun massages his temples. "I don't need to read all 300 pages of your draft to know that you probably wrote another spin-off. And no, you are not writing a sequel to Nothingness. Kris, how many times are we going to argue about this?"
Kris sinks in his seat. He hasn't released a book since ending his Forty-seven Shades series ‐ of Light, of Darkness, of Nothingness. The series ends in a tragedy where Christian, the lead male, severs ties with Anastasia, the lead female, following a tragic mishap at work. "Let's just keep things professional," Christian tells Anastasia, and Christian files for a transfer to a different department. There is no closure, no definite ending, but Kris hints at a final sequel to Forty-seven Shades of Nothingness, and fans have so lovingly decided to call it Forty-seven Shades of Completion.
Kris takes a deep breath. He can file for a transfer ala Christian, but everyone knows that his niche is erotica fiction; non-erotica simply isn't his style.
"I'm stuck," he confesses. "I've been stuck for the past few months, for the past year, and I want to deviate from my usual genre but nothing's coming out."
Joonmyun coughs. "I see what you did there." He then adjusts his glasses. "And I appreciate that you're trying to "explore" and all, but maybe this isn't the time for that. You're weeks behind your deadline for the plot. You've never missed a deadline, ever."
"I don't want to be grouped with the rest of the erotica writers. I want to be seen as someone who can write porn with substance."
There is silence for a while. A small smile tugs at the corner of Joonmyun's lips and Kris shivers a little. It's the same smile that makes him feel like a kid clamoring for Joonmyun's attention and affection, the same smile that makes him throw bad ideas into the trashcan and write an entirely new (and better) plot that Joonmyun can be proud of. "I think you just need a break," Joonmyun says, finally breaking the silence, and Kris just nods.
"But you'll have to start writing after this."
"Then you'll have to buy me good food. And we'll have to eat cheesecake for dessert."
Joonmyun laughs. Kris can feel a plot brewing at the back of his mind.
"Your wish is my command."
Their partnership began when Kris was twenty four. Joonmyun was fresh off of college and Kris was naive and wrote what Chanyeol usually called "tasteless porn". Kris was working on the first book in the Forty-seven Shades series back then, and by that time everybody had already forgotten about Christian Grey. Only a year after did Joonmyun remember who Christian Grey was, and berate Kris for writing a plot similar to that of Fifty Shades'.
Joonmyun has been his editor ever since.
Kris has released a total of five books - three from his Forty-seven Shades series, a pocketbook tackling highschool romance and the many places you can make out in, and a novel about office romance and work tension resulting in the best table sex ever.
"So, what's stopping you from writing outside of the erotica realm?"
Kris scrunches his nose. "I have no idea, to be completely honest. I guess I'm just tired of writing about sex day and night."
At the back of his head, Kris processes the next set of questions from Joonmyun.
He actually has a very good idea of why he wants to deviate from his usual genre - he has run out of sex plots to talk about. After researching for days on end and seeking information from his friends, he's gotten boring answers and nothing that can be used for a literary material, much more a raunchy novel. Finally, at the very bottom of his "why I should try writing something else" list - Joonmyun rarely ever gets a boner while reading his writing anymore. It's not a good sign.
"I was going to suggest romance, but you know nothing about romance."
Kris rests the fork on the small plate and frowns a little. "So are you implying that I'm well-versed in porn?"
Joonmyun laughs. "I don't know, I don't think I want to know, and I'm glad I don't."
I know a lot about romance, Kris wants to argue. Unrequited feelings, to be exact, he appends, and studies Joonmyun's features - the crinkle of his eyes, the faint lines on his forehead from all those nights of editing and drawing sad faces on Kris' drafts with a red pen, the playful smile on his lips. He takes a deep breath. Four years isn't a lot of time, but when you spend nearly every single day with the same person the whole time, it feels like a decade, maybe even more. He wakes up to Joonmyun's calls about work and manuscripts and good coffee everyday. He goes to bed thinking about his next book and the disappointed look on Joonmyun's features every night. In the four years that they have known each other, Joonmyun has carved a niche in his life and has squeezed himself in it. Now, Kris isn't just Kris - he's part Kris and part Joonmyun.
"I can try romance," Kris says with finality. "I like challenges."
Joonmyun laughs again and takes a piece of his cheesecake. Some crumbs stick to the corner of his lips.
Kris plots out the story in his head. A girl sets off in a quest to be the best manhwa artist ever, and scores a deal with one of the biggest publishing houses in the country. She gets assigned to a strict editor. After spending enough time with her editor, she finds out that he's not entirely strict and the worst person to ever surface Earth. She gets sick after meeting a tight deadline, and her editor takes care of her. The inevitable happens - she finds herself developing feelings for her editor, so she portrays him as a villain in her next manhwa, except the lead female falls in love with him.
It's terribly cliche and trite, but that's how romance novels usually are.
"I'll send you a summary tonight," Kris says. "Prepare to be blown away."
Kris sees Yixing again the same week, emerging from one of the conference rooms. "Story pitch," Yixing says, mumbling, and Kris just nods, unwilling to engage in a conversation.
"Readers are asking for a sequel to Lonely Nights in Changsha so I proposed a plot to the board and they shot it down." Yixing exhales, eyes falling downcast on the floor.
"Why don't you just write about wisteria and a girl waiting for the man of his destiny," Kris replies flatly.
Yixing laughs a little. "Funny. But that can actually work."
And it does, Kris learns when he bumps into Yixing the Monday of the following week. "Thanks for the suggestion," Yixing says, then dashes off with his editor who's donning the brightest blond hair. "I'll make sure to thank you in the book!"
I'd rather you don't, Kris wants to say, but he gives Yixing a small smile and waves at him, anyway. His phone sounds off not too long after - it's a message from Joonmyun, written in all caps. "COME TO MY OFFICE NOW"
"I know you have issues with your phone, but can you not yell at me through text?" he says once he reaches Joonmyun's office. Joonmyun peers from his laptop's screen and pushes his glasses up. Kris furrows his eyebrows. This is Joonmyun's way of telling him that there's something wrong that should be fixed right away. The last time it happened was when Kris overlooked some pronouns that made the lead female undergo a sex change; it was disconcerting. Kris moves closer and clasps his hands together.
"I just finished reading that five-page summary of yours," Joonmyun begins. Kris holds his breath as Joonmyun's lips stay parted. "And I liked it. Chanyeol was raving about it through text, so yes - it's good. You should start writing it soon."
Light breaks across Kris' features and he feels his lips being tugged at the corners, forming a grin too big and weird for his facial structure that a look of worry surfaces on Joonmyun's face. "I won't let you down," he says, determined, and Joonmyun gives him that smile again.
"You never did."
"So on a scale of 1-10, how cheesy is this story and how much does it resemble your love life?"
Kris shoots Chanyeol a stern look and places their drinks on the table - tall, non-fat Cappuccino for him, and something overly customized and too sweet for Chanyeol. "On a scale of 1-10, how amazing would it be if I poured your coffee all over your face?" he retorts, and Chanyeol just scoffs.
"Good, as long as you lay off my hair. Double caramel pump?
"Yes."
"Awesome. I'll give your story a 5, then."
Kris leans back into the seat and watches as Chanyeol goes back to reading his manuscript. Back when he was just starting out, Joonmyun took offense in Kris making someone else other than his editor read his drafts. "It's rude. It's like you don't want me in your life," he remembers Joonmyun telling him. He also remembers scoffing and shoving his draft in Joonmyun's chest. These days, Joonmyun already assumes Chanyeol has gone through his draft and is usually surprised when Chanyeol hasn't.
"Honestly, though, this is good. Better than your porn series."
"It's a trilogy."
"Porn trilogy, then."
Chanyeol is a movie director. He's all extremes - he's extremely nice to talents, yet extremely strict and hard on his team. "Good cop, bad cop. It gets movies done. It gets me awards. Haters can die of sugar deprivation," Chanyeol would say whenever he's asked about the way he works. Half the time, Kris is grateful for Chanyeol's honesty; other times, he doesn't bother figuring out if it sits well with him.
"Why did you say it's better than the trilogy, though?"
"Well." Chanyeol puts the draft down and takes a sip of his coffee. "First off, it's not tasteless porn. You've actually created new characters, and they actually have personalities, and your story finally has substantial plot. I'm pretty proud of you, not even gonna lie.
"And I like the build up to the girl getting sick. It sounds a lot like November 2015."
Kris smiles a little. He appreciates the fact that Chanyeol can remember moments in his life like scenes in a film. "And February 2016," he adds, and Chanyeol nods, laughing a little.
"D'you think he'll notice?"
Kris shrugs. "Doubt it. He's dense."
Dense is a word he has reserved for Joonmyun and Joonmyun alone. Not that he's been overt with his display of affection, but he's obvious enough that even Joonmyun's associate editor - Zitao - can tell that he's a bit too attached to Joonmyun. And attracted. He's spearheaded every birthday celebration Joonmyun has had since 2013, has accompanied Joonmyun to every family reunion that Joonmyun would rather not attend, has spent the past three Christmases and New Year's Eves with Joonmyun, serving him too much wine and rubbing circles on Joonmyun's back while Joonmyun throws up in the sink. "And you don't look like that kind of guy," Zitao even comments within Joonmyun's earshot, but Joonmyun's too busy blowing candles and talking to guests and mouthing to Kris, GET ME OUT OF HERE.
"Yeah. He's dense. You can probably give him flowers and chocolates and he won't even realize that you're trying to woo him."
As expected, Chanyeol is right.
He arrives at Joonmyun's office the following day with a bouquet of flowers in one hand and a box of chocolates in the other. "For encouraging me to try something different," Kris says, and Joonmyun takes both presents with a soft smile and a question at the curl of his lips.
"Have you been reading too much manhwa? You've probably been reading too much manhwa."
"I have to," Kris says, choking a little. Dense and in-denial do not go well together. "I mean, I'm writing about a manhwa artist and-"
Joonmyun laughs. Joonmyun laughs loud and he cackles and he's gasping for breath at the end of it all. "You're funny," he tells Kris once he catches his breath, and Kris just shakes his head and texts Chanyeol, Theory proven. He is dense.
take him out after submitting the final manuscript and propose to him there hahaha
Hell, no. Or I can try that just for kicks.
Yeah, I will.
Park Chanyeol, I will kill you if something bad happens.
your fault not mine. i didn't do anything to make you fall in love with the densest man in the world HAHAHAHAHA :p
There's still a full week before the deadline when Kris finishes the whole story. Chanyeol has finally given him a go signal to present it to Joonmyun, and Kris has finally been able to keep his hands away from the keyboard long enough to change some scenes and make some minor fixes. He appears on Joonmyun's office's doorstep unannounced, his draft in one hand and a box of donuts in the other.
"Are you bribing me?"
Kris laughs a little, then looks for a place where he can place the box. Joonmyun's desk is a mess - there are piles of manuscript's left and right, and his coffee mug looks as if it hasn't been washed for three days. There are numerous cups of coffee and some boxes of take-out food in the trashcan.
"No. I'm feeding you. Have you been working overtime again?"
Joonmyun smiles weakly. Kris just shakes his head and makes space for the box to Joonmyun's right, then hands Joonmyun his manuscript.
"Wow. You're way ahead of schedule. Is something wrong? Are you dying?"
Possibly. Three days before finally finishing the story, he hit the worst writer's block and subsequently felt the strangest urge to just walk up to Joonmyun and just tell him how he felt, face-to-face instead of through the story. He locked himself up in his house, took no calls, and had food delivered for the next three days. He was able to finish the story two days after, and only then did he unlock his doors and boot up his phone and send a text to Chanyeol, saying, "Read my draft. Bring some food. I'm starving."
Of course, he didn't tell Joonmyun about this. Joonmyun is a worrywart - it's enough that he's already worrying about deadlines and keeping Zitao from strangling the incompetent writers on board.
"I was inspired. Now go, eat and read the story. And please refrain from the facial expressions."
Joonmyun laughs a little and smiles upon seeing the donuts. "Aww, hangul donuts! What are these English letters- IQU?"
Kris just shakes his head, and the smile on Joonmyun's lips and his eyes soften. Facial expression #1.
Joonmyun goes through the manuscript without looking up at Kris, only tearing his gaze from the material to check which part of his name he's eating.
Kris fishes for his notebook from his bag and starts writing keywords, phrases, then, eventually, paragraphs. It's a side-story to the story he has just written. It's about Joanne's new manhwa getting sold out the week it is released, and Kevin taking her out to celebrate the success of her new manhwa. They have too much soju and too little samgyupsal, and Joanne has the worst alcohol tolerance and ends up getting too drunk, sputtering a clumsy confession and promptly passing out of Kevin's lap after that.
Kevin takes her to his house and watches her sleep. When Joanne wakes up, Kevin has already gone to work, but has left her a note - Good job. Meet me for lunch. Celebration Part 2! - and some breakfast.
Joanne sinks in her seat and buries her face in her hands. Kevin should stop being so nice, she thinks. Kevin should also stop being so darn attractive.
"A happy ending," Joonmyun suddenly says, eyes wide and a smile on his lips. "Seriously. You wrote something that ends happily."
"Am I not allowed to try something different?"
"Yeah, but-" Joonmyun's smile widens and he exhales loudly. "Wow. That was something different. It felt raw. Real. And I loved that you included dates and all those little moments, like Kevin taking care of Joanne when she got sick after meeting the deadline and all."
Kris coughs a bit. "That part was my favorite." He tucks the pen in his notebook and lays it aside, then reaches for a donut. "So, do I need to fix anything?"
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but no. This is perfect! Are you free tomorrow? We can meet with the cover artist so we can get things moving."
Kris furrows his eyebrows and stares and inches closer. "You mean the first draft is already good?"
Joonmyun nods, then gives him two thumbs up. His fingers are tiny and a bit stubby. "You'll have to thank the donuts for this."
Kris nods and laughs a little. "Yeah. I guess I have to. So, dinner? My treat."
Then the scene he's just written earlier plays in his mind, in images so crisp and clear that they look too realistic for daydreaming. But Joonmyun is frowning and shaking his head and saying, "Ah, sorry, not today. Pretty swamped with work. Zitao's been sick the whole week so I'm covering for him."
Kris swallows the rest of the donut down his throat and gives Joonmyun a small smile. "It's okay. Lunch, then. Tomorrow, after the meeting."
He leaves not too long after, hands now empty, and he keeps repeating the image of Joonmyun's smile in his head, that satisfied look in Joonmyun's features, This is perfect! spilling from Joonmyun's lips. It's enough a reward for all his hard work, so he relishes the thought, too much, in fact, that he fails to hear Joonmyun calling his name behind him.
Hello! I can't come to the phone right now, so please leave a message after the beep and I'll get back to you the soonest I can. Thanks!
"Hey Joonmyun, I left a notebook in your office this afternoon when I submitted my draft. It's a green notebook and there's a pen inside it. I'll get it from you tomorrow, before the meeting?"
Hello! I can't come-
"And oh, don't open it. Don't even think of doing anything to it. Thanks. Bye."
Kris comes down with the worst cold when he wakes up in the morning. He checks his calendar - two weeks too early to get sick - and buries his face in his pillows. He dozes off again, and only wakes up an hour after, to the sound of his phone buzzing and at the sight of Chanyeol's picture flashing on his phone's screen.
"Hey. What's up?"
"Kris?" The line chops up a little Chanyeol sounds three octaves too high. "I've been calling you for an hour already but you weren't picking up so I called Chanyeol."
Ah. Joonmyun. "Oh, shit. Sorry." He sits up, then sniffles. "I'm down with a cold. Can you buy time while I get dressed? I'll be there in… thirty minutes. Or you can have the artist go through the manuscript so she can start visualizing-"
"There won't be a meeting, and you're not going here. Stay in bed, Kris. I'm coming over."
In the background, Kris can hear Chanyeol saying, Oooh. Whipped. He exhales loudly and just mumbles an okay in response, then unlocks his front door. He puts his phone as far away from him as possible and promptly collapses on his couch, in pajamas too small for him, Joonmyun's first present on his first year in SM Publications.
The next time Kris wakes up is at noon, just in time for lunch. "Here, I made some soup," Joonmyun tells him ,and he slowly sits up, limbs still sore.
"You should stop taking care of me when I'm sick. You have the immune system of baby panda."
"Says the one who has a scheduled colds season every year." Joonmyun chuckles a bit, then gestures for Kris to take another sip of the soup. "Finish that, then drink this tablet. I'll just grab some coffee."
His mind goes back to November 2015, the day he realized that he fancied Joonmyun's face too much and that, maybe, he was attracted to Joonmyun. Joonmyun's face was too close and Joonmyun was replacing the cold towel on his forehead and going on about taking a long rest because he deserved it, and that they maybe they should go out of town to celebrate Kris finally completing the trilogy. Then, he remembers February 2016 and all other moments pertinent to it - having to take care of Joonmyun after Joonmyun took care of him, meeting Joonmyun's grandparents and, subsequently, taking them out to dinner, being thanked by Joonmyun's grandparents because, "You know him. He pushes himself too hard. He's a workaholic. It's a good thing you're there to take care of him."
Kris remembers nodding a bit too enthusiastically. "He's also too nice and too good at what he does. It's a sin."
"Have you taken your medicine?" Joonmyun asks when he gets back, looking considerable more refreshed than he was minutes ago. The first sip of coffee always does wonders. Kris nods and offers a smile. "Good. Now, close your eyes and get some rest. I'll just be here."
"But I've just eaten."
"You know what I mean."
Kris laughs a little. "Thanks," he replies, mumbling, then does as he is told because it doesn't hurt to let Joonmyun have his way from time to time just so Kris can have his way. He closes his eyes, and scenes from a movie start playing in his eyes and he just watches until he drifts off.
In a week, Kris' recovers from his fever but not from his colds. He meets up with the cover artist without Joonmyun's knowledge and gives specific instructions as to the appearance of the characters and, when he goes to Joonmyun's office, Joonmyun is nowhere to be found. Kris' green notebook is at the center of Joonmyun's desk, though, and the pen is on top of it. There's also a sticky note tacked to it, saying, "Going to Malaysia to look for a cheaper paper supplier." Then, in small letters, "Drink your vitamins." When Kris opens his notebook, he sees notes in red ink, copywriting marks, and a some characters scribbled on the last page of the story.
Kris.
Let's talk.
---
He receives a text message from Joonmyun when Joonmyun gets back. "Breakfast tomorrow, 7 a.m.. Don't be too early," it says, and Kris' initial reaction is to exit Joonmyun's message as quickly as possible and call Chanyeol.
Sorry, can't come to the phone right now. I'm in the middle of doing something. Obviously. And oh, if you're Kris, whatever it is you're going to ask, it's a yes. Chanyeol, out!
"Wow. What a friend," Kris mumbles. He then decides to boot up his computer and go through his story again, to see if the scenes he has written are too realistic or too similar to his experiences. If Chanyeol's memory is good, Joonmyun's is even better; Joonmyun can narrate a chunk of Kris' life since scoring a deal with the company and not miss a detail.
He's sure he's made parallelisms vague enough so that his story will be more easy to relate to, but he might have overlooked something. He ends up falling asleep on his keyboard, though, and, when he wakes up, A, S, D, and F have already left a good impression on his skin.
"I don't know what you've been up to, but I hope that thing isn't permanent," Joonmyun says when Kris arrives, eyes still puffy.
"Thanks, but I think it's rather cool. Fashionable, even." He coughs a bit as he settles on the seat opposite Joonmyun. Two weeks of no contact whatsoever, two weeks of not seeing Joonmyun and being left with a note like that, has done all sorts of things to his mind. The worst that has happened is him continuing the side story. The best is scrapping the whole continuation and resolving to himself to not write a sequel.
"So, how was your trip?"
Joonmyun smiles, then takes a deep breath.
The succeeding minutes are of Joonmyun narrating his exciting exploits in Malaysia, meeting suppliers left and right, and somehow ending up on a book hunt. Kris understands Joonmyun's excitement over books, but he will never be able to understand Joonmyun's enthusiasm for meeting all sorts of people.
"Oh, the pancakes are for him," Joonmyun tells the waiter when the food arrives, and the waiter serves him a huge pancake. It's a bit burnt around the edges, and is decorated with whipped cream smiley and strawberry syrup. "Go on, eat. Don't worry about me."
Joonmyun's beef and kimchi salad arrives not too long after, and Joonmyun reveals that he actually made a quick trip to Hongkong to visit a friend and ended up buying more books and scarves than intended. He takes out a package from his bag and reaches for Kris' hand, then places the present on it. "Just a little something for beating the crap out of that deadline."
"Pancakes, sir?"
Kris looks up, a bit distraught, but smiles just the same. "No, I'm good."
"Yes, he'll take it."
Joonmyun's smiling brighter than the usual. Kris doesn't have a problem with it - of course, he doesn't - but there's something terribly off-putting about it, like the sides of Joonmyun's lips are being pulled apart and that the smile is going to rip through his face any moment. He starts to eat the new giant pancake, anyway, to keep the smile on Joonmyun's lips, and notes that the design is now a winking smiley.
"They have pretty interesting stuff here," Kris comments.
Joonmyun chokes on an slice of beef. "Yeah. Very interesting." Joonmyun clears his throat, then rushes, "So, Tsim Sha Tsui! You know Kowloon Park? Nothing has ever made me feel so small!"
The narration is nearing Joonmyun's return to Korea when the third plate of pancake arrives. "Joonmyun, are you trying to make me hate pancakes?" Kris asks even before taking a glance at the pancake the waiter has just laid on his side of the table. "I mean, I know they're my favorite and I know you know that but-"
Joonmyun just laughs and points at the pancake, then bites his lower lip.
There are letters written on the pancake, and Kris has to lean back a bit to get a better view of the whole thing. He furrows his eyebrows for a while until the realization hits him.
"IQ- Oh."
Kris wants to laugh. He wants to make fun of the whole situation and of Joonmyun, of the pancake decorated with the letters "IQU" and a small "2" beside it, of himself. He takes another look at the pancake just to make sure that he's not missing a detail, then looks at Joonmyun again.
"My hangul donuts were better."
Joonmyun chuckles. "Shut up. This was the best I could think of."
There's a good full minute of silence as Kris slices the pancake with utmost care. He cuts out the "2" for Joonmyun and puts it on Joonmyun's plate, saying, "You have to share my pain," and Joonmyun slaps him lightly on the arm.
"Oh, by the way," Joonmyun says after a while. "I read the side story."
Kris lays his utensils flat on the plate and looks at Joonmyun in the eye. It's a breach of trust, what Joonmyun has just done, but he can't seem to find it in his heart to get mad, much less be disappointed. He studies the way Joonmyun's lips press together tightly, the smile that was once there disappearing as Joonmyun says, "It's horrible. Don't even think about expanding it."
Kris doesn't bother to hold back the laughter threatening to fall from his lips, just lets himself laugh out loud and breathe and shake his head, then shoots something akin to a hurt look at Joonmyun. Joonmyun sticks his tongue out. Kris almost knocks his coffee over, and they laugh all the more. There's a wisteria tree in the distance and Kris can see the petals being carried by the wind, and he laughs all the more. They look silly and stupid but they haven't talked for two weeks, and this love story is four years in the making, and Kris hardly knows anything about romance - requited love, that is.
He won't mind learning now, though.
Despite Joonmyun's dislike for the side story, Kris' new book finally gets the top spot the same way that Joanne's new manhwa does, and Z. Lay's new book sits comfortably on the second. Initial stocks are sold out within a week, and Chanyeol attributes this mostly to Kris' new photo in the "About the Author" panel, and that nice, handwritten signature that adds a personal touch to it. Of course, they celebrate, but Kris doesn't get drunk, and neither does Joonmyun, but they make sure that Chanyeol drinks more than enough alcohol to actually get him to talk to his new director of photography, Baekhyun.
Chanyeol wakes up the following day with the worst hangover and with a message from Baekhyun, saying, "That was a great night ;)"
Kris wakes up to a call from Chanyeol that same morning, and to the scent of the coffee Joonmyun is brewing in the kitchen.
He won't have it any other way.
Captain Obvious, Captain Oblivious
Thanks to:
Wink, for always believing in me and for the pancakes.
My crazy best friend, for being crazy.
SM Publications, for giving me the opportunity to share this book with people all over the world.
And to Z, my good friend, wisteria moments are real.
---
a/n:
1. "IQU" is a tragic misspelling of "IOU" or "I♥U".
2. The director of photography is also called a cinematographer.
3. Yixing's new book that got the #2 spot is, yes, the one about the wisteria tree and the girl waiting for the man of his dreams. LOL.
4. Kris wrote the two other books (the ones that don't belong to the trilogy) after writing the trilogy.
5. Lu Han is Yixing's editor. Yup, the guy with the bright blond hair.
6. The title was taken from Snow Patrol's Signal Fire.
7. PLEASE DIRECT ALL COMPLAINTS AND FEELS TO JQ madelyn93 AND JO halcyondusk. TYSM.