exo: comings and goings
Comings and Goings
- Kris/Suho. PG-13. 2007 words.
- The trip to London isn't as turbulent as expected. Kris wonders if it's just Joonmyun and his habit of moving around too much that's rocking his world.
- For Bijae jonghyun, because she wanted Amsterdam!KrisHo. Or just KrisHo. ♥
- PSA: I had Busker Busker win in this particular fic, but Chris Lee is the real winner of the Best Worldwide Act award.
i. "So it's just you and me, huh?"
Kris peeks from his bangs, lips still wrapped around the straw of his drink. It's the first time Joonmyun has spoken since passing customs and grabbing a drink; Kris reckons the coffee has finally taken root in Joonmyun's body. He replies with light laughter and a casual shrug, then reaches to take a sip of Joonmyun's coffee - the holiday cup is a betrayal of the black coffee Joonmyun has bought.
"Hey, you grabbed my cup. You know I like my coffee black."
I love pretending that I don't. Kris passes the cup back to Joonmyun. "You have the taste of an old man."
"Says the one who's older than me."
Despite the height difference, it's so easy for Joonmyun to hook an arm around Kris' shoulder, to pull Kris down to his height so he can whisper in Kris' ear. Often, Kris wonders if he's really the old one between the two of them, if Joonmyun is just pretending to be small and meek and mild-mannered. He wonders if he yields to Joonmyun too much, too easily. He wonders if he's giving himself away.
A little over eleven hours. This will be a long flight.
They're lucky to have been booked in business class. Joonmyun speeds past Kris and claims the window seat, but then Kris has always preferred the aisle seat, anyway. He sinks in his seat after liftoff and sifts through the songs in his iPod, but Joonmyun looks as if he's dying to say something when they meet each other in the eye.
"Sometimes I love travelling when we're not complete," Joonmyun comments. He laughs after a while, and Kris follows suit. "I mean, business class. They can't always spend this much for twelve people."
"Don't let Jongin hear you saying that. You know the prospect of disbanding upsets him."
Joonmyun rests a hand on Kris' thigh. "Relax, duizhang. It's just you and me here." Slow licking of the lip, then, "Besides, that was just a joke."
"A bad joke."
Joonmyun retracts his hand and props his chin on his left hand, instead. "You're boring."
Thirty minutes into the trip, Joonmyun falls asleep. Joonmyun isn't a classy sleeper, always has his lips slightly parted, forming a tiny 'o' as he breathes out almost inaudible snores. Joonmyun shivers, so Kris grabs the corners of his blanket and gently lays it on Joonmyun, careful to not wake the latter up. Joonmyun stirs, though, and Kris quickly retreats, leaning back in his seat and closing his eyes for effect.
When they alight the plane, Joonmyun holds on to him longer than the usual. Maybe it's because of fatigue or sleep pulling at Joonmyun's eye lids. Maybe it's because of Joonmyun's lack of balance. Maybe it's because it's just the two of them. Or maybe it's because that's just the way things are (even if the shy smile on Joonmyun's lips says otherwise).
ii. They're shuffled to Super Junior's concert as soon as they arrive. Joonmyun had said, "You should've changed into something better," eyeing Kris' outfit from head to toe. Kris had argued, "Says Mr. Plain-in-a-simple-gray-shit-and-black-leather-jacket."
"I've got charisma to pull this off."
"Charisma the size of a thumb drive." Kris chuckled, and hadn't stopped laughing every ten seconds ever since.
They're a good distance from the stage, and the area is dimly lit. Kris' breath hitches when he feels a cold hand squeezing his arm. "Great view," Joonmyun comments. There's a playful tug at the corner of Joonmyun's lips. "Mhmm?"
"You planned this, didn't you?"
"What- I don't get to decide who flies to London to see SS5 and attend the EMAs." Joonmyun squeezes Kris' arm again, this time lighter than before. "Besides, we're the leaders. I think it's a given that we'll represent the group."
"And Lu Han can't keep his mouth shut about things that don't make sense." Kris leans into the touch, even when Joonmyun curls his fingers around Kris' nape. "Yeah. We're the perfect choice."
There's a peculiar curl at the curve of the lip. Often, Kris thinks it's trouble; most of the time, Joonmyun means well, save for when he secretly laces their fingers or when he leans in too close that Kris can feel his breath on his skin. And get a whiff of Joonmyun's scent. Joonmyun always smells like coffee, or strawberries; occasionally, of Kris.
"I wouldn't say perfect, but close enough." Joonmyun pulls Kris closer. Kris is thankful for the lack of people near them and the poor lighting.
"Closer."
Joonmyun furrows his eyebrows.
"I said, closer."
Kris sinks his hands in his pockets as Joonmyun shifts in his seat, the space between them now completely forgotten. Kris looks around for an audience, then leans on Joonmyun's shoulder. He can hear Joonmyun humming - he's not sure if it's a song from their upcoming album or one of SHINee's. It drowns out the noise around him, even the louding beating of his heart.
"I regret everything," Joonmyun says later, when Kris shows him his KKT exchange with Jongdae, the conversation donned with pictures of their brief appearance at Super Show 5, then a picture of Joonmyun crying in Running Man.
"You just have an expressive face."
"Ugly and expressive face."
This is just a phase, Kris says to himself - Joonmyun rarely gets upset - so he bumps lightly against Joonmyun, mumbling, "My favorite ugly face."
The faintest laughter escapes Joonmyun's lips. "How is that supposed to make me feel better?"
"It isn't; it's supposed to make you feel loved."
Joonmyun stands still, eyes locked with Kris. Kris could see the struggle, Joonmyun biting the inside of his cheek to keep himself from smiling. "Come on, we still have a schedule in Amsterdam," Joonmyun says, then hooks an arm around Kris' own.
"Okay, fine. You're not ugly, but you're still my favorite."
"Just shut up, Kris." Joonmyun looks up at him. "Or I'll kiss you in the middle of the street.
Kris hangs his head low and wraps his scarf around his neck tighter, suddenly too aware of Joonmyun - Joonmyun's bright smile, bright laughter, Joonmyun's breath on his skin - beside him.
The train ride to Amsterdam takes only a little over four hours and only two different conversation topics, because Joonmyun falls asleep halfway through. Kris follows the ritual, draping his scarf over Joonmyun, then watching Joonmyun do all sorts of weird and attractive things with his lips as he sleeps.
Kris can't decide which one he prefers - travelling by plane or by train. Right now, he really doesn't have to pick.
iii. They don't get to do much in Amsterdam, save for lounging in their hotel. Joonmyun calls dibs on a bubble bath, so Kris takes it as an opportunity to go to the sauna. "This is the only time we'll get to rest," Kris remembers Joonmyun saying, when Kris expresses interest in going out for a walk or to explore the place.
He contemplates briefly on joining Joonmyun but he knows that, if he does, they'll never get any rest.
"I'm heading out. Be back in an hour or two."
"Where to?"
Kris gulps. "Sauna. 8th floor. I'll be back."
He closes the door behind him even before he can hear Joonmyun's reply.
It doesn't surprise him, though, when Joonmyun comes to join him, the towel wrapped around his waist too loose, hanging just below the small of his back. Kris draws his knees close to each other as he gives Joonmyun a curt nod, as Joonmyun saunters towards him, then settles right beside him, skin brushing against skin.
"I thought you were going to have a bubble bath."
Joonmyun smiles. "I like the heat better."
There's silence for a good few minutes, until Joonmyun stretches his legs on the seat. "Do you mind?" he asks, turning to Kris with a familiar smile on the curve of the lip. Kris nods, clasping his hands and sitting up straight.
Joonmyun slowly slides down until he's lying flat on his back, the towel riding up his thighs a little. "I'll never get some time off with you around, won't I?" Kris asks, and Joonmyun just grins.
"They don't have security cameras here. I asked."
"What?"
"I said-" Joonmyun's hair is all over his face. It's supposed to look messy and thoroughly unattractive, but it doesn't. "No one's watching."
Kris takes a deep, deep breath.
Joonmyun nearly bumps into a glass door on their way back to the room. "Hey, I didn't think I was that good," Kris says, teasing, and Joonmyun just slaps him on the arm, letting his fingers dance on Kris' skin and brush against Kris' own when he lets his hand fall to his side.
Kris catches Joonmyun's hand by the pinky and doesn't let go.
Kris is in the middle of running his acceptance speech in his mind when the winner is announced - it sounds strangely far from E-X-O and sounds a lot like Busker Busker.
We... lost. Kris gulps down hard. We... didn't win.
He furrows his eyebrows on instinct and frowns. Joonmyun's fingers are cold on his skin, wrapped tightly around his wrist. When he looks up, he's met by a warm yet rehearsed smile; he wonders briefly how long it has taken Joonmyun to master that art.
"It's okay, we did our best," Joonmyun says, but Kris knows better than to believe Suho, the leader mask Joonmyun is wearing at this very moment. He knows better than to let his frustration show, too.
He puts on a show for the cameras and tries to convince himself that he's okay, but heart versus mind has never been a fair battle for Kris. The result is a weak smile, hooded eyes, and Joonmyun's palm flat on the back of his hand. Warm, real.
("Post-defeat sex?" Joonmyun offers, stretching on their shared bed. His shirt rides up, just enough to expose his stomach and for Kris to consider accepting the offer.
"I hope it doesn't turn out like sake."
Joonmyun crawls to where Kris is, then presses his palms flat on Kris' knees. "Only if you're really, really bitter about the loss."
Kris laughs a little. Trust Joonmyun to successfully trick other people, even himself, into believing that everything is okay, that everything will be alright. "What if I am?"
Joonmyun winks, then slides a hand up Kris' thigh. "I'm sure you'll be as sweet as always."
The sound of Kris' laughter fills the room for the next ten seconds, until Joonmyun presses their lips together, sucks on his bottom lip and his neck and his collarbones, sucks every inch of fatigue and sadness out of him.)
iv. Back to London, then back to Seoul. Back to a dorm filled with the noise of ten people. Now more than ever, it feels a lot like home, and Kris doesn't bother fighting the smile making its way to his lips when he hears the ruckus from the other side of the door.
"Ready?" Joonmyun asks. It feels a lot like 2012 or maybe even before that, when they were still trainees and there were more hugs, touches, not-stolen kisses. Kris wouldn't say that he minds the surprises, but it would be great if Joonmyun wasn't so sneaky all the time, wasn't so secretive.
Kris takes a deep breath. "Whenever you are."
Joonmyun drops his bags to the floor and tiptoes, just enough to meet Kris' lips. Kris knows how this will play out - he's been around for too long to know this particular trick of Joonmyun's - so he decides to outplay Joonmyun, curling his free hand around Joonmyun's name and pressing their lips together. He counts, slowly, yi, er, san, and pulls away when the sound grows louder, when Minseok's voice rises above the rest in an attempt to organize the chaos.
When the door opens, Joonmyun's still staring at him, eyes wide and lips slightly parted.
Kris turns to the group in front of them and grins.
"We're home."
- Kris/Suho. PG-13. 2007 words.
- The trip to London isn't as turbulent as expected. Kris wonders if it's just Joonmyun and his habit of moving around too much that's rocking his world.
- For Bijae jonghyun, because she wanted Amsterdam!KrisHo. Or just KrisHo. ♥
- PSA: I had Busker Busker win in this particular fic, but Chris Lee is the real winner of the Best Worldwide Act award.
i. "So it's just you and me, huh?"
Kris peeks from his bangs, lips still wrapped around the straw of his drink. It's the first time Joonmyun has spoken since passing customs and grabbing a drink; Kris reckons the coffee has finally taken root in Joonmyun's body. He replies with light laughter and a casual shrug, then reaches to take a sip of Joonmyun's coffee - the holiday cup is a betrayal of the black coffee Joonmyun has bought.
"Hey, you grabbed my cup. You know I like my coffee black."
I love pretending that I don't. Kris passes the cup back to Joonmyun. "You have the taste of an old man."
"Says the one who's older than me."
Despite the height difference, it's so easy for Joonmyun to hook an arm around Kris' shoulder, to pull Kris down to his height so he can whisper in Kris' ear. Often, Kris wonders if he's really the old one between the two of them, if Joonmyun is just pretending to be small and meek and mild-mannered. He wonders if he yields to Joonmyun too much, too easily. He wonders if he's giving himself away.
A little over eleven hours. This will be a long flight.
They're lucky to have been booked in business class. Joonmyun speeds past Kris and claims the window seat, but then Kris has always preferred the aisle seat, anyway. He sinks in his seat after liftoff and sifts through the songs in his iPod, but Joonmyun looks as if he's dying to say something when they meet each other in the eye.
"Sometimes I love travelling when we're not complete," Joonmyun comments. He laughs after a while, and Kris follows suit. "I mean, business class. They can't always spend this much for twelve people."
"Don't let Jongin hear you saying that. You know the prospect of disbanding upsets him."
Joonmyun rests a hand on Kris' thigh. "Relax, duizhang. It's just you and me here." Slow licking of the lip, then, "Besides, that was just a joke."
"A bad joke."
Joonmyun retracts his hand and props his chin on his left hand, instead. "You're boring."
Thirty minutes into the trip, Joonmyun falls asleep. Joonmyun isn't a classy sleeper, always has his lips slightly parted, forming a tiny 'o' as he breathes out almost inaudible snores. Joonmyun shivers, so Kris grabs the corners of his blanket and gently lays it on Joonmyun, careful to not wake the latter up. Joonmyun stirs, though, and Kris quickly retreats, leaning back in his seat and closing his eyes for effect.
When they alight the plane, Joonmyun holds on to him longer than the usual. Maybe it's because of fatigue or sleep pulling at Joonmyun's eye lids. Maybe it's because of Joonmyun's lack of balance. Maybe it's because it's just the two of them. Or maybe it's because that's just the way things are (even if the shy smile on Joonmyun's lips says otherwise).
ii. They're shuffled to Super Junior's concert as soon as they arrive. Joonmyun had said, "You should've changed into something better," eyeing Kris' outfit from head to toe. Kris had argued, "Says Mr. Plain-in-a-simple-gray-shit-and-black-leather-jacket."
"I've got charisma to pull this off."
"Charisma the size of a thumb drive." Kris chuckled, and hadn't stopped laughing every ten seconds ever since.
They're a good distance from the stage, and the area is dimly lit. Kris' breath hitches when he feels a cold hand squeezing his arm. "Great view," Joonmyun comments. There's a playful tug at the corner of Joonmyun's lips. "Mhmm?"
"You planned this, didn't you?"
"What- I don't get to decide who flies to London to see SS5 and attend the EMAs." Joonmyun squeezes Kris' arm again, this time lighter than before. "Besides, we're the leaders. I think it's a given that we'll represent the group."
"And Lu Han can't keep his mouth shut about things that don't make sense." Kris leans into the touch, even when Joonmyun curls his fingers around Kris' nape. "Yeah. We're the perfect choice."
There's a peculiar curl at the curve of the lip. Often, Kris thinks it's trouble; most of the time, Joonmyun means well, save for when he secretly laces their fingers or when he leans in too close that Kris can feel his breath on his skin. And get a whiff of Joonmyun's scent. Joonmyun always smells like coffee, or strawberries; occasionally, of Kris.
"I wouldn't say perfect, but close enough." Joonmyun pulls Kris closer. Kris is thankful for the lack of people near them and the poor lighting.
"Closer."
Joonmyun furrows his eyebrows.
"I said, closer."
Kris sinks his hands in his pockets as Joonmyun shifts in his seat, the space between them now completely forgotten. Kris looks around for an audience, then leans on Joonmyun's shoulder. He can hear Joonmyun humming - he's not sure if it's a song from their upcoming album or one of SHINee's. It drowns out the noise around him, even the louding beating of his heart.
"I regret everything," Joonmyun says later, when Kris shows him his KKT exchange with Jongdae, the conversation donned with pictures of their brief appearance at Super Show 5, then a picture of Joonmyun crying in Running Man.
"You just have an expressive face."
"Ugly and expressive face."
This is just a phase, Kris says to himself - Joonmyun rarely gets upset - so he bumps lightly against Joonmyun, mumbling, "My favorite ugly face."
The faintest laughter escapes Joonmyun's lips. "How is that supposed to make me feel better?"
"It isn't; it's supposed to make you feel loved."
Joonmyun stands still, eyes locked with Kris. Kris could see the struggle, Joonmyun biting the inside of his cheek to keep himself from smiling. "Come on, we still have a schedule in Amsterdam," Joonmyun says, then hooks an arm around Kris' own.
"Okay, fine. You're not ugly, but you're still my favorite."
"Just shut up, Kris." Joonmyun looks up at him. "Or I'll kiss you in the middle of the street.
Kris hangs his head low and wraps his scarf around his neck tighter, suddenly too aware of Joonmyun - Joonmyun's bright smile, bright laughter, Joonmyun's breath on his skin - beside him.
The train ride to Amsterdam takes only a little over four hours and only two different conversation topics, because Joonmyun falls asleep halfway through. Kris follows the ritual, draping his scarf over Joonmyun, then watching Joonmyun do all sorts of weird and attractive things with his lips as he sleeps.
Kris can't decide which one he prefers - travelling by plane or by train. Right now, he really doesn't have to pick.
iii. They don't get to do much in Amsterdam, save for lounging in their hotel. Joonmyun calls dibs on a bubble bath, so Kris takes it as an opportunity to go to the sauna. "This is the only time we'll get to rest," Kris remembers Joonmyun saying, when Kris expresses interest in going out for a walk or to explore the place.
He contemplates briefly on joining Joonmyun but he knows that, if he does, they'll never get any rest.
"I'm heading out. Be back in an hour or two."
"Where to?"
Kris gulps. "Sauna. 8th floor. I'll be back."
He closes the door behind him even before he can hear Joonmyun's reply.
It doesn't surprise him, though, when Joonmyun comes to join him, the towel wrapped around his waist too loose, hanging just below the small of his back. Kris draws his knees close to each other as he gives Joonmyun a curt nod, as Joonmyun saunters towards him, then settles right beside him, skin brushing against skin.
"I thought you were going to have a bubble bath."
Joonmyun smiles. "I like the heat better."
There's silence for a good few minutes, until Joonmyun stretches his legs on the seat. "Do you mind?" he asks, turning to Kris with a familiar smile on the curve of the lip. Kris nods, clasping his hands and sitting up straight.
Joonmyun slowly slides down until he's lying flat on his back, the towel riding up his thighs a little. "I'll never get some time off with you around, won't I?" Kris asks, and Joonmyun just grins.
"They don't have security cameras here. I asked."
"What?"
"I said-" Joonmyun's hair is all over his face. It's supposed to look messy and thoroughly unattractive, but it doesn't. "No one's watching."
Kris takes a deep, deep breath.
Joonmyun nearly bumps into a glass door on their way back to the room. "Hey, I didn't think I was that good," Kris says, teasing, and Joonmyun just slaps him on the arm, letting his fingers dance on Kris' skin and brush against Kris' own when he lets his hand fall to his side.
Kris catches Joonmyun's hand by the pinky and doesn't let go.
Kris is in the middle of running his acceptance speech in his mind when the winner is announced - it sounds strangely far from E-X-O and sounds a lot like Busker Busker.
We... lost. Kris gulps down hard. We... didn't win.
He furrows his eyebrows on instinct and frowns. Joonmyun's fingers are cold on his skin, wrapped tightly around his wrist. When he looks up, he's met by a warm yet rehearsed smile; he wonders briefly how long it has taken Joonmyun to master that art.
"It's okay, we did our best," Joonmyun says, but Kris knows better than to believe Suho, the leader mask Joonmyun is wearing at this very moment. He knows better than to let his frustration show, too.
He puts on a show for the cameras and tries to convince himself that he's okay, but heart versus mind has never been a fair battle for Kris. The result is a weak smile, hooded eyes, and Joonmyun's palm flat on the back of his hand. Warm, real.
("Post-defeat sex?" Joonmyun offers, stretching on their shared bed. His shirt rides up, just enough to expose his stomach and for Kris to consider accepting the offer.
"I hope it doesn't turn out like sake."
Joonmyun crawls to where Kris is, then presses his palms flat on Kris' knees. "Only if you're really, really bitter about the loss."
Kris laughs a little. Trust Joonmyun to successfully trick other people, even himself, into believing that everything is okay, that everything will be alright. "What if I am?"
Joonmyun winks, then slides a hand up Kris' thigh. "I'm sure you'll be as sweet as always."
The sound of Kris' laughter fills the room for the next ten seconds, until Joonmyun presses their lips together, sucks on his bottom lip and his neck and his collarbones, sucks every inch of fatigue and sadness out of him.)
iv. Back to London, then back to Seoul. Back to a dorm filled with the noise of ten people. Now more than ever, it feels a lot like home, and Kris doesn't bother fighting the smile making its way to his lips when he hears the ruckus from the other side of the door.
"Ready?" Joonmyun asks. It feels a lot like 2012 or maybe even before that, when they were still trainees and there were more hugs, touches, not-stolen kisses. Kris wouldn't say that he minds the surprises, but it would be great if Joonmyun wasn't so sneaky all the time, wasn't so secretive.
Kris takes a deep breath. "Whenever you are."
Joonmyun drops his bags to the floor and tiptoes, just enough to meet Kris' lips. Kris knows how this will play out - he's been around for too long to know this particular trick of Joonmyun's - so he decides to outplay Joonmyun, curling his free hand around Joonmyun's name and pressing their lips together. He counts, slowly, yi, er, san, and pulls away when the sound grows louder, when Minseok's voice rises above the rest in an attempt to organize the chaos.
When the door opens, Joonmyun's still staring at him, eyes wide and lips slightly parted.
Kris turns to the group in front of them and grins.
"We're home."