NaNo junk
If you all think that what's going down in your novels is bad, I bet mine is worse.
For example.
Nina frowned. "Author, stop it with the writer's block already. You're being stupid." Just then, the clouds amassed over our unfortunate heroine's head. Rain poured down on her, soaking the sandwich in her hand. And then, a voice boomed from the sky;
"PWN'D."
Intues chirped. Wait, chirped? It seems the powers that be had something to say about him, too- Our favorite crossdresser had been turned into a bird. Not just any bird, but Psittacidae, melopsittacus undulatus, the lovebird.
Had our seething male main character been able to talk, he would have said something along the lines of a death threat. Or six. As it was, his singing and hopping was recorded by our closet bird-watcher, Lyn. This didn't last for long- You see, there was something about that sandwich that just wasn't right.
In the next moment, Nina found herself without a hand. Or, to be more exact, it was covered in a mutant tuna sandwich. Screaming and flailing ensued. Then, suddenly, it was a slash scene. Intues, having enlisted the help of the Muse, shook his again-human hand at the author.
"I object! You're not pairing me up with the sandwich."
"Yes."
"No."
"You suck."
"You're a weirdo."
"I'm going to kill you in the next chapter, you know."
"Well I'm going to make the muse hate you."
"Will not."
"Will too!"
This stunning piece of dialog was cut short when Che ran in, flinging curses about the void. "See! I told you! You're all going to diii--" Suddenly, or maybe not so suddenly, a hand grenade fell from the sky onto the woman's head. As it made impact, there was a rasping sound from the sky; Having killed her self-insert, The Powers That Be had killed herself. Intues blinked.
"On second thought... Let's not go to Camelot."
I rock. Just not. :D
For example.
Nina frowned. "Author, stop it with the writer's block already. You're being stupid." Just then, the clouds amassed over our unfortunate heroine's head. Rain poured down on her, soaking the sandwich in her hand. And then, a voice boomed from the sky;
"PWN'D."
Intues chirped. Wait, chirped? It seems the powers that be had something to say about him, too- Our favorite crossdresser had been turned into a bird. Not just any bird, but Psittacidae, melopsittacus undulatus, the lovebird.
Had our seething male main character been able to talk, he would have said something along the lines of a death threat. Or six. As it was, his singing and hopping was recorded by our closet bird-watcher, Lyn. This didn't last for long- You see, there was something about that sandwich that just wasn't right.
In the next moment, Nina found herself without a hand. Or, to be more exact, it was covered in a mutant tuna sandwich. Screaming and flailing ensued. Then, suddenly, it was a slash scene. Intues, having enlisted the help of the Muse, shook his again-human hand at the author.
"I object! You're not pairing me up with the sandwich."
"Yes."
"No."
"You suck."
"You're a weirdo."
"I'm going to kill you in the next chapter, you know."
"Well I'm going to make the muse hate you."
"Will not."
"Will too!"
This stunning piece of dialog was cut short when Che ran in, flinging curses about the void. "See! I told you! You're all going to diii--" Suddenly, or maybe not so suddenly, a hand grenade fell from the sky onto the woman's head. As it made impact, there was a rasping sound from the sky; Having killed her self-insert, The Powers That Be had killed herself. Intues blinked.
"On second thought... Let's not go to Camelot."
I rock. Just not. :D